I just have to!

[Kimberly]

I'm sorry to do this everyone, but here comes one big rant. You've seen it all before, I'm sure, so if you don't want to read this then you can bail out now. ;)

Still with me? Cool!

I'm just incredibly annoyed at the moment, with the way that my dressing is being restricted by social rules that I cannot control... I can only break them, and either amuse (but offend me) or hurt a lot of other people by doing so. I just want to be out... but I can't see it being something that will happen for a long time yet.

When I say long, I probably mean only a few years. When I consider how you all must have felt around my age, and what pressures were on you to dress and act a certain way, then my situation seems quite good compared to yours. Times have changed, but not enough for me to be able to go "Hi guys, I'm a CD... Don't mind my skirt and heels. I know I'm a guy, but I just wanna wear 'em! :o"

A couple of days ago I had a hairband in... wore it out. It was a pretty androgynous headband though - something David Beckham would have worn a few years ago. So, I thought it was alright - so did my friends... but some annoying teens, (about my age,) weren't so happy about it. Well, they were. So much so, that they burst out laughing... we quickly left, and nothing much happened apart from me being in a bad mood for the rest of the day.

So I came back to my room and what did I do?? Dress and go on here... and put the world to rights in my head. Well, that isn't good enough, really, is it?? We can rant and rave on this site and many others like it, where we know that we won't get any hate messages (quite the contrary!) and where we can all let off steam about the wrongs in "society." Well, I just feel a bit rubbish sitting here in this box I call a room... most of my life seems to be lived sitting inside this box.

Okay... this is turning from a rant into a pledge of action. I promise, (and you can all hold me to this,) that I will do something positive about transgenderism each day... whether its argue with someone who says a word against the community, or whether its telling someone about how I live my life, or whether its finding out whats going on in my local area for TS/TGs. And I also promise to go out dressed some time this winter.... that gives me 3 months. November till January. I must do this... otherwise I will actually go completely crazy and then they'll be a big melted mess on the floor that used to be known as Kimberly.

Sorry guys... hope you stayed with me on that one xx

[Amelie]

There is one way to spread the word that Cding isn't a bad thing, and it's right in front of your eyes, the computer. If anyone here has a hobby or other interest outside of Cding, then join forums about your hobbies, but join them as a CD. I am on other non-CD forums where the people know me as a CD or a she-male. But because I have knowledge in these forums, people don't make fun of me or insult me, they accept me and I freely participate in the forums even though they know I am a Cd. I even post pics of myself so they can see me.

In this way people who usually don't come into contact with a CD, can see and talk to me and then they find out Cds are not bad people. I find most people on other forums that I am on are very curious, they do PM me and ask me questions that I answer, some questions people at CD.com might find offensive but I don't, so I answer them. And then a friendship develops with me and the other members.

So, use your computer and join other forums as a CD, and spread the word that CDs are not all that bad. And if you get hasseled at one of these other forums,,well,,,just leave it and look for another forum.

[Kimberly]

I know an online game I'm on, (where I play a female character,) where some people know I am a CD... I'm gonna come out fully on there, but that means telling a friend of mine - I have no idea how he'll take it.

Looks like I'll find out!

Thanks Amelie - you always seem to have a good arguement for everything! :)

[Sophie_A]

Got to agree with Amelie, im a member of a car club, and I came out on our end of season bash, and then the next weekly meet, Sophie went along, yes there was lots of questions but if you answer everyone honestly and openly, they will accept you alot easier. I think its something to do with if you are completely open, its an impossible target to attack, especially within public, as they themselves are left vunerable to the wrath of the group. All my work colleagues know and the only people who dont is the boss and his wife, but that is only a matter of time, about once a month she has a homophobic rant, and this time rather than keeping quiet, im laying it all on the table, we have rights to live how we want.

Kimberly dont be a molten mess on the floor, and live your life regretting, the saddest two words are 'if only'. Friends can sometimes be shocked, and then take a little while to get to know you again, but if they dont its their loss not yours.

[paulaN]

amelie I think you have a wonderful idea. it works for me. and should work for just about everyone. And kinberly you'll get there it takes time but you'll get there.

[Wendy me]

thats sooooo what i am talking abought ...see when we want to just be who we are and can't be then comes a point were we do have to do something ...
you go girlfreind.....