More than a year later, conversation still opens new understanding

[Jenniferathome]

I am about 1 1/2 into my coming out to my wife of 20+ years. We talk about my crossdressing whenever I like. My wife tends to have few questions unless I open the conversation but when I do,she always has a question or two. Recently I was asking her opinion about what top goes with what skirt and jewelry etc., and she said something that surprised me as we had talked so frequently. Her comment was something like, "I'm worried that you think one last item will make you magically pass." I walked her through the idea of blending and removing as many "man" queues as possible as well as showing as many female queues as possible. She got it and was relived that I was not fooling myself. She was quick to tell me that I looked attractive as a woman but my male features would always give me away. I'm ok with that. I was surprised that her understanding of this point took so long. Just shows that I didn't explain well enough before and conversation is always good.

So to the wives and girlfriends out there, we need your help with the total look but keep us grounded and keep asking questions.

[Shelly Preston]

Jennifer, its great you can talk about it whenever you wish.

I think you have found that good communiation is the key you progesssion and understanding :)

[Cynthia Anne]

I would say you are blessed with a loving and understanding wife! That is great!

[AllieSF]

I always read your threads and think how great it must be to be partnered with someone who "gets" "it" most of the time. It is hard enough to do that without the transgendered situation included. I congratulate you and her on your open communication. As to you not explaining it well enough, that is always a matter of degrees from the explaining side and the hearing side. You may have done just fine, but saying it in another way, in this case, may have done the trick to get your idea across. Keep up the good work.

[Barbara Ella]

Jennifer, it is wonderful to read your threads and see how your wife is with you. I am only 7 months into coming out, and I know the progress will be small steps, but it is heartening to see where your wife is after a year. I almost would say only one year, as I know CD time passes much quicker, and I always hope to see things happen ten times quicker than they do, but cannot complain about anything that brings a little more happiness to all individuals concerned.

So please continue the conversations. That is the key.

Barbara