Frédérique
07-16-2012, 06:36 PM
(Author’s note: before I get this lengthy discourse underway, I wish to say that I am using the word “society” to describe the people of my country and my community as a whole. These are the people that have set a standard, and everyone that is affected by that standard is a part of it. I could very well write “An open letter to the real world,” since our own community represents a kind of society, but, on further review, I will stick with the original title.)
Dear society,
How are you? Well, I don’t have to ask, do I? Some say you are crumbling, but, based on all that I see, hear, and read, I’m guessing you’re doing pretty well these days. Speaking (I mean writing) as a societal outcast, I’m either NOT doing well (by your standards), or I’m doing well within the constraints you have so inconveniently provided. It’s a challenge, but I’m doing as well as I can...
Can I ask you a question? Before you answer that, can you see me? Do you WANT to see me? I’m way over here next to the edge, barely in the frame. Anyway, is it necessary that I must conform to others? If every boy is actively being a boy, and every girl is actively being a girl, can’t I slip in-between there somewhere? Do I have to be like everyone else? Do I have to think like everyone else? I’d really like to think for myself, but are the physical and psychological beatings necessary? Individuality gets a lot of lip service, such as “Question everything,” or “Be all you can be,” but I’m guessing you want me to achieve some sort of standardized perfection, and not individual goals in regards to happiness, correct? Oddly enough, this “open” letter is a form of questioning EVERYTHING...
Why are only heterosexuals accepted in (or by) society? Huh? Are you afraid that procreation will somehow cease if a majority of the populace embraces same-sex relationships or alternative lifestyles? Are you afraid that our beloved consumer “culture” will disintegrate? Are you afraid that production will be affected, and those in control (who rely on procreation and rampant consumerism) will be faced with mounting anarchy? ANY other sexuality, be it gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgendered will be physically and verbally abused by heterosexuals, even though the GLBT community doesn’t deserve such abuse – in case you haven’t noticed, WE haven’t done anything bad to YOU. We just want to live our lives OUR WAY, and, allegedly, we have the right to do so. Remember rights?
At this point I should mention that I am a MtF crossdresser, which means I’m a male that wears women’s clothing on occasion. This is part and parcel of a concerted effort on my part to distance myself from my inherent masculinity, not be like every other male, not think like every other male, and not sell out to the standard you have put forth. All that is true, but I also like to make use of my senses, my imagination, and my willingness to be different. Even though males are supposed to be completely opposed to all things feminine, many of us like such things, and we seek to express our feminine “side,” as it is often called. Ironically, this blessed inversion comes about because of the physical and verbal (and mental) abuse I referred to earlier – bullying is allowed to fester, serving its transparent function as adolescent policing. We boys are being bent into shape to fit the standardized mold, but some of us, the lucky few, get bent OUT of shape...
Imagine that – a boy wishes to wear a dress. How terrible! How hideous! How perverted! He’s on the wrong path, you say, but I say he’s on the right path – I’m willing to guess that this particular boy will never hurt anyone, unless those around him are perfect examples of current society. He knows who he is (have you ever heard that one?), he has tapped into his powers of imagination, and he is extremely courageous – you have made it extremely difficult to cross the gender “line,” society, but the boy somehow did it, and he’s not going back. Not to worry, though – our boy in a dress may or may not be heterosexual, which means he may still get married, raise a family, and begrudgingly do all those “correct” things he’s supposed (or expected) to do, yet, despite his best intentions, he is branded a deviant, a pervert, or a queer for doing what comes naturally. It’s just a dress, for crying out loud, but you’re worried about what the dress may represent...
The truth is, any further ruling on the individual past the concern of the society is perversion. You want people to be obsessed with questions of having and not being. It seems ridiculous to me that certain things are forbidden, and yet the opportunity is there for the taking. Since the human body, M or F, has certain characteristics in common (two arms, two legs, a neck, etc), it only takes a short skip over to the adjacent clothing area to see, touch, and try on some REALLY interesting things! You only have yourself to blame, society – you force boys to be prisoners in uncomfortable, drab clothes, perhaps getting them used to the uncomfortable, drab lives they will soon need to embrace. Girls have nicer things, in line with a need to attract males and do their part in this ongoing ritual of standardization. I know society worships the male orgasm, which may explain why such a fuss is made about certain types of clothing, but it may interest you to know that many MtF crossdressers dress up FOR the orgasm. That’s OK, isn’t it?
What? That’s wrong? I beg to differ. I KNOW that only the orgasm matters. I see it everyday on TV, being clubbed into my head against my will. The “Are you half the man you used to be?” commercial comes on every ten minutes, I swear, neatly placed between the ads for male impotency products. Males are presented as virile so-called “individuals” who “know who they ARE.” Funny. I know who I am, but I’m not going to erect a monument to that effect. Every time I see this male-oriented propaganda, I wonder how the poor females are doing – I’m sure some are happy, some are blissfully unaware, some don't care, and some are shaking their heads (as they should be). Same as it ever was in this hunting-and-collecting male-dominated world, which is why I stepped off of the merry-go-round a long time ago. There’s no room for sissified male compassion, is there? That means I have to take matters into my own hands and explore new territory. When I put on a dress I feel complete, positively changed, and the master (mistress) of my own existence...
As far as I’m concerned, I didn’t have far to go to cross the alleged gender divide. There has always been plenty of “girl” in me waiting to be defined. Others make an arduous trek from one side to the other, complicated by feelings of shame or personal disgust that had been implanted at an early age by people who sold out years ago. To paraphrase the late, great Christopher Hitchens, this is child abuse of the highest order. A boy should be allowed to explore his sexuality, as well as his imagination and his self-defined personal boundaries. In other words, free-thinking should be the order of the day. You have nothing to worry about, society – the world has been imagined into existence by courageous free-thinking individuals. You need individuals in society in order to survive and maintain the system. Against the backdrop of anti-minority bias, we, the few, will continue to prosper. I think we were once referred to as “The Meek,” but we go by different names now, ones that reflect our varying degrees of personal courage and commitment...
You should be proud of US, but I know you never will be. We won't ever be welcomed anywhere, we won’t have a “day” set aside in our honor (officially sanctioned by society, I mean), and you won’t see a squadron of queers execute a fly-over during a sporting event. Same as it ever was, which is sad, but something deviant like my MtF crossdressing falls outside normalcy and conformity in a rather BIG way. I know my place. I can’t be seen en femme by the children playing over in the next yard, because then their parents, conformists all, may be forced to explain something with no decent information at hand. They MAY have to think, and we can’t have any of that, can we? This may be beyond understanding, even to the one DOING it! I don’t wish to be a burden to society, in fact I don’t mind slipping through the societal cracks, going about my chosen existence unseen, living as a very human being, using the brief time that is left to me in an efficient manner. BTW, thanks for providing the cracks to slip through – I appreciate it...
One more thing – do you care about culture? No, not popular culture, ACTUAL culture! The kind of culture that resides in museums, or can be heard in concert halls, or can be read in a fine book (remember real books?). I get the feeling you don’t care, society, and, speaking of feelings, I get the feeling you’re afraid of feeling emotion. I KNOW you’re not going to cry (that’s a given), but how about acknowledging the fact that there are some people in the world who DO have feelings? I think you’re embarrassed by displays of emotion, many of which exist within culture for all to see, hear, or feel. It’s a fear of intimacy, plain and simple, which accounts for nearly all of the self-perpetuating group mindset that afflicts the unenlightened. If you can imagine touching something, and becoming emotional because of it, you might understand why a human being (a male, in this case) might seek out such pleasure and...perhaps...wear something he’s not supposed to, like a dress...
You need to gain an appreciation of culture, for it is at the forefront of human achievement. Keep the LOGO channel on TV (put it back, I mean), for it is a watered-down user-friendly portal to the GLBT world. It’s not much, but it’s something. Please don’t worry about the proverbial fabric of society unraveling at the mere mention of alternative anything – to borrow YOUR over-used phrases: “Think outside the box,” “Push the envelope,” and “I don’t believe what I just saw.” Believe it. Oh, one more thing – please don’t let pressure, be it societal, familial, or peer, cause the boy next door to give up playing the violin. I know that society WANTS the boy to play sports, to prepare him for those other things in life that sports only represent, but leave him alone. He’s making a beautiful sound, on his own, a willful decision on his part – I’d much rather hear his plaintive music than listen to the conformist cacophony of aggression that passes for society these days. Who knows – he just might try on a dress one fine day...
Love, Freddy
PS -With each new day there is less and less to see, or do, or feel, or aspire to. In short, there’s NOTHING going on. Thanks, society...:hmph:
PPS – Check out my pretty dress! Oh, never mind...:doh:
*****
Please feel free to add anything to my effusive, unsolicited rant...:yt:
Dear society,
How are you? Well, I don’t have to ask, do I? Some say you are crumbling, but, based on all that I see, hear, and read, I’m guessing you’re doing pretty well these days. Speaking (I mean writing) as a societal outcast, I’m either NOT doing well (by your standards), or I’m doing well within the constraints you have so inconveniently provided. It’s a challenge, but I’m doing as well as I can...
Can I ask you a question? Before you answer that, can you see me? Do you WANT to see me? I’m way over here next to the edge, barely in the frame. Anyway, is it necessary that I must conform to others? If every boy is actively being a boy, and every girl is actively being a girl, can’t I slip in-between there somewhere? Do I have to be like everyone else? Do I have to think like everyone else? I’d really like to think for myself, but are the physical and psychological beatings necessary? Individuality gets a lot of lip service, such as “Question everything,” or “Be all you can be,” but I’m guessing you want me to achieve some sort of standardized perfection, and not individual goals in regards to happiness, correct? Oddly enough, this “open” letter is a form of questioning EVERYTHING...
Why are only heterosexuals accepted in (or by) society? Huh? Are you afraid that procreation will somehow cease if a majority of the populace embraces same-sex relationships or alternative lifestyles? Are you afraid that our beloved consumer “culture” will disintegrate? Are you afraid that production will be affected, and those in control (who rely on procreation and rampant consumerism) will be faced with mounting anarchy? ANY other sexuality, be it gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgendered will be physically and verbally abused by heterosexuals, even though the GLBT community doesn’t deserve such abuse – in case you haven’t noticed, WE haven’t done anything bad to YOU. We just want to live our lives OUR WAY, and, allegedly, we have the right to do so. Remember rights?
At this point I should mention that I am a MtF crossdresser, which means I’m a male that wears women’s clothing on occasion. This is part and parcel of a concerted effort on my part to distance myself from my inherent masculinity, not be like every other male, not think like every other male, and not sell out to the standard you have put forth. All that is true, but I also like to make use of my senses, my imagination, and my willingness to be different. Even though males are supposed to be completely opposed to all things feminine, many of us like such things, and we seek to express our feminine “side,” as it is often called. Ironically, this blessed inversion comes about because of the physical and verbal (and mental) abuse I referred to earlier – bullying is allowed to fester, serving its transparent function as adolescent policing. We boys are being bent into shape to fit the standardized mold, but some of us, the lucky few, get bent OUT of shape...
Imagine that – a boy wishes to wear a dress. How terrible! How hideous! How perverted! He’s on the wrong path, you say, but I say he’s on the right path – I’m willing to guess that this particular boy will never hurt anyone, unless those around him are perfect examples of current society. He knows who he is (have you ever heard that one?), he has tapped into his powers of imagination, and he is extremely courageous – you have made it extremely difficult to cross the gender “line,” society, but the boy somehow did it, and he’s not going back. Not to worry, though – our boy in a dress may or may not be heterosexual, which means he may still get married, raise a family, and begrudgingly do all those “correct” things he’s supposed (or expected) to do, yet, despite his best intentions, he is branded a deviant, a pervert, or a queer for doing what comes naturally. It’s just a dress, for crying out loud, but you’re worried about what the dress may represent...
The truth is, any further ruling on the individual past the concern of the society is perversion. You want people to be obsessed with questions of having and not being. It seems ridiculous to me that certain things are forbidden, and yet the opportunity is there for the taking. Since the human body, M or F, has certain characteristics in common (two arms, two legs, a neck, etc), it only takes a short skip over to the adjacent clothing area to see, touch, and try on some REALLY interesting things! You only have yourself to blame, society – you force boys to be prisoners in uncomfortable, drab clothes, perhaps getting them used to the uncomfortable, drab lives they will soon need to embrace. Girls have nicer things, in line with a need to attract males and do their part in this ongoing ritual of standardization. I know society worships the male orgasm, which may explain why such a fuss is made about certain types of clothing, but it may interest you to know that many MtF crossdressers dress up FOR the orgasm. That’s OK, isn’t it?
What? That’s wrong? I beg to differ. I KNOW that only the orgasm matters. I see it everyday on TV, being clubbed into my head against my will. The “Are you half the man you used to be?” commercial comes on every ten minutes, I swear, neatly placed between the ads for male impotency products. Males are presented as virile so-called “individuals” who “know who they ARE.” Funny. I know who I am, but I’m not going to erect a monument to that effect. Every time I see this male-oriented propaganda, I wonder how the poor females are doing – I’m sure some are happy, some are blissfully unaware, some don't care, and some are shaking their heads (as they should be). Same as it ever was in this hunting-and-collecting male-dominated world, which is why I stepped off of the merry-go-round a long time ago. There’s no room for sissified male compassion, is there? That means I have to take matters into my own hands and explore new territory. When I put on a dress I feel complete, positively changed, and the master (mistress) of my own existence...
As far as I’m concerned, I didn’t have far to go to cross the alleged gender divide. There has always been plenty of “girl” in me waiting to be defined. Others make an arduous trek from one side to the other, complicated by feelings of shame or personal disgust that had been implanted at an early age by people who sold out years ago. To paraphrase the late, great Christopher Hitchens, this is child abuse of the highest order. A boy should be allowed to explore his sexuality, as well as his imagination and his self-defined personal boundaries. In other words, free-thinking should be the order of the day. You have nothing to worry about, society – the world has been imagined into existence by courageous free-thinking individuals. You need individuals in society in order to survive and maintain the system. Against the backdrop of anti-minority bias, we, the few, will continue to prosper. I think we were once referred to as “The Meek,” but we go by different names now, ones that reflect our varying degrees of personal courage and commitment...
You should be proud of US, but I know you never will be. We won't ever be welcomed anywhere, we won’t have a “day” set aside in our honor (officially sanctioned by society, I mean), and you won’t see a squadron of queers execute a fly-over during a sporting event. Same as it ever was, which is sad, but something deviant like my MtF crossdressing falls outside normalcy and conformity in a rather BIG way. I know my place. I can’t be seen en femme by the children playing over in the next yard, because then their parents, conformists all, may be forced to explain something with no decent information at hand. They MAY have to think, and we can’t have any of that, can we? This may be beyond understanding, even to the one DOING it! I don’t wish to be a burden to society, in fact I don’t mind slipping through the societal cracks, going about my chosen existence unseen, living as a very human being, using the brief time that is left to me in an efficient manner. BTW, thanks for providing the cracks to slip through – I appreciate it...
One more thing – do you care about culture? No, not popular culture, ACTUAL culture! The kind of culture that resides in museums, or can be heard in concert halls, or can be read in a fine book (remember real books?). I get the feeling you don’t care, society, and, speaking of feelings, I get the feeling you’re afraid of feeling emotion. I KNOW you’re not going to cry (that’s a given), but how about acknowledging the fact that there are some people in the world who DO have feelings? I think you’re embarrassed by displays of emotion, many of which exist within culture for all to see, hear, or feel. It’s a fear of intimacy, plain and simple, which accounts for nearly all of the self-perpetuating group mindset that afflicts the unenlightened. If you can imagine touching something, and becoming emotional because of it, you might understand why a human being (a male, in this case) might seek out such pleasure and...perhaps...wear something he’s not supposed to, like a dress...
You need to gain an appreciation of culture, for it is at the forefront of human achievement. Keep the LOGO channel on TV (put it back, I mean), for it is a watered-down user-friendly portal to the GLBT world. It’s not much, but it’s something. Please don’t worry about the proverbial fabric of society unraveling at the mere mention of alternative anything – to borrow YOUR over-used phrases: “Think outside the box,” “Push the envelope,” and “I don’t believe what I just saw.” Believe it. Oh, one more thing – please don’t let pressure, be it societal, familial, or peer, cause the boy next door to give up playing the violin. I know that society WANTS the boy to play sports, to prepare him for those other things in life that sports only represent, but leave him alone. He’s making a beautiful sound, on his own, a willful decision on his part – I’d much rather hear his plaintive music than listen to the conformist cacophony of aggression that passes for society these days. Who knows – he just might try on a dress one fine day...
Love, Freddy
PS -With each new day there is less and less to see, or do, or feel, or aspire to. In short, there’s NOTHING going on. Thanks, society...:hmph:
PPS – Check out my pretty dress! Oh, never mind...:doh:
*****
Please feel free to add anything to my effusive, unsolicited rant...:yt: