Would you still dress-up if... ?

[Ambergold43]

Hi everyone! I am pretty much brand new to the site and so far I have enjoyed reading through many of your posts and threads. I am amazed and inspired by the diversity of stories and people on here! This is my first attempt at starting a thread so I'm sorry if something along these lines has been posted in the recent past! Not trying to spam the idea or anything!

So, to the point: It is no secret that male-to-female crossdressing is somewhat of a social taboo (slight understatement, perhaps?) and that there is a lot of anxiety associated with the various aspects of it. Especially when it comes to wondering about how others will treat us, accept us, or not... particularly family, friends, and SO's. Of course, many people dress for many different reasons, whether it be purely for entertainment, excitement, identity purposes, etc. Personally, though, for me part of the excitement that comes from Crossdressing is the idea of breaking a very ingrained social/cultural norm... sort of thumbing my nose at several generations worth of gender construction and being able to escape the "boxes" the genders have been caged in. I'm sure many of us have gone shopping in the women's section of department stores alone and felt a bit of an adrenaline rush? Just me? Well, if you do know the feeling, thats what I'm talking about.

I don't want to belabor the point, so my question is this: If crossdressing was completely unstigmatized, and men could buy and wear dresses, make-up, the whole nine-yards without anyone even raising an eyebrow, would you still get the same thrill? Or do you think that at least some of the fun from subverting gender norms would dissipate?

[STACY B]

Hell yea ,,, Then you could just find way better things to do an wear an realy pus it to new places . Maybe find something else to do that is as Taboo as this ,,, Always trying to be difficult I know !

[Karren H]

yeah but would probably have to add something like robbing banks to compensate....

[BRANDYJ]

It's about as hypothetical of a questions as can be. But if that ever happened, I do think that it would loose some if not all the allure that attracts us to crossdress. Not everyone, but many would participate far less and some might even give it up all together. Of course some may never again present as males and choose to wear feminine clothing 24/7 and present as females. The new social norm would net as many different feelings and actions as there is in this wide range of what we call crossdressers now. Over-all, we would gain something and lose something in the ay we feel about it.

[sometimes_miss]

Amber, for a lot of us, there's no thrill involved. We just feel normal when dressed in female clothing, and uncomfortable when dressed as males. So the answer is sure, I would continue to dress in whatever way makes me comfortable.
I guess what I'm trying to get across is that there's no sexual link to my crossdressing.

[daphne_pynk]

i think i would mix both genders into some sort of feminine male on a casual day and go full femme on those special days or holiday parties.

[Lorileah]

Yes, since I don't do it for the thrill or because it is sexually stimulating. In fact I would dress more especially at work where I have to present more male so I can make money :)

[Sarah Doepner]

I'd dress because I feel very comfortable when I present as female. For thrills I'd offer to be Karren's getaway driver.

[Karren H]

I'd dress because I feel very comfortable when I present as female. For thrills I'd offer to be Karren's getaway driver.

Im ready!! Bonnie and Claudette.....

[Janelle_C]

I think I would be a casual most of the time and a little gender bending. I'm pushing the gender limits now as much as I can.

[Janice An]

I would dress female 24/7 365 days a year except when doing dirty physical work.
My male wardrobe would be purged 95% and then things would start getting expensive!!!

[carhill2mn]

I do not "dress" for the thrill of it. If there were no "stigma" attached to Cding I would present as a woman nearly all of the time as that is the look that I prefer.

[bridget thronton]

I agree - no stigma and I would dress whenever or where ever the mood struck

[MelanieB]

As a first attempt at starting a thread Ithink you come up with a cracker...


Amber, for a lot of us, there's no thrill involved. We just feel normal when dressed in female clothing, and uncomfortable when dressed as males. So the answer is sure, I would continue to dress in whatever way makes me comfortable.
I guess what I'm trying to get across is that there's no sexual link to my crossdressing.

I think this for me suumarises my feelings with the exception that how I dressed would have to be appropriate for my activities at the time

Walking dogs up the Cumbrian Fells dressed in stockings and sussies may not be quite right :)

[Ambergold43]

Thanks for replying ladies! Totally a major hypothetical! I hope my question hasn't offended anyone in some way or anything, I'm definitely not trying to over-generalize and lump all CD's into the category of those that get purely some sort of "thrill" from it. Of course, if a person identifies as and prefers to present as female, then she will prefer to present that way regardless of whether society really accepts it or not, as she should! I'm writing from the perspective of a part-time Crossdresser, and so the question may have been set up geared more towards those on this end of the spectrum!

To answer my own question though, I would probably still do it, I'd just have to some way to still be subversive (can't condone bank robbery though Karren!), maybe thats just part of my personality?

[AngieStone]

One big advantage if it was not taboo would be that we would have a hell of a lot more to chose from. A whole range of heels designed in our size and more fashion, dresses designed just for us as male. You think you spend a lot now on clothes, it would be off the charts for me at least if I had more to chose from. What a nice thought.

[RileyEvans]

I don't dress for a thrill, I mainly do it to relieve stress and because it gives me a feeling of being right. If all the stigma was gone it would make things even better because I wouldn't have to hide things any more.

[Foxglove]

Amber, for a lot of us, there's no thrill involved. We just feel normal when dressed in female clothing, and uncomfortable when dressed as males. So the answer is sure, I would continue to dress in whatever way makes me comfortable.
I guess what I'm trying to get across is that there's no sexual link to my crossdressing.

Thanks, Lexi, you saved me the trouble of writing my own post on this one.

Annabelle

[kimdl93]

I like Sometimes_miss's response. It also brings to mind an old Eagles song "After the Thrill is Gone"

[DonniDarkness]

My answer for me:

If crossdressing was accepted by the general populous, then that would mean that society no longer viewed it as "degrading" for a man to wear womens clothing. It would still be taboo, because a great majority of men have no desire whatsoever to present themselves in a feminine fashion.

Societys' acceptance of crossdressing would just remove the negativity from the experience. The emotional gratification would still be the same....as in you are out and accepted without shame, as a Man who embraces feminine fashion and has a personal gender identity that is feminine in form. The Emotional and Psychological Fulfillment that crossdressing brings us would still be there, it would just be rid of the negativity that goes on among societies view of us as Transvestites/Crossdressers.

So, the real question that intrigues me is this: If you were accepted by society would you still keep your male presentation separate from your female presentation?

For me "gender" would just all blend together into androgyny, which is me everyday, even with all the negativity directed towards my community.

Great Topic,
-Donni-

[Alice B]

Without a doubt. But that is always going to be a pipe dream for most of us.

[kimdl93]

Yup. Ok, for the record, my answer is "Yup". But I needed at least 20 characters to post a response.

[Jenniferathome]

the taboo would be gone so that going out was much less stressful, but the desire would still be there for me. I don't dress for the taboo thrill.

[Sharon B.]

Yes I would continue to dress if all of the taboo's would be gone. I enjoy dressing as a woman even though the only time I go out completely dress as a woman is out for a drive or if I have something I need to mail I will make it a point to walk in a post office after hours to mail something. As far as shopping at a woman's store I am usually under-dressed as a woman with some light makeup on and I will let the sales associate know the items I am purchasing are for myself.

[jillleanne]

If the moon turns green, the clouds turn purple and the air turns pink( and for many here it does regularly), I will continue to express my feminine side. I am trangender. I know and accept it. I express my feminine side for me, no one else. I already buy and wear dresses, make-up, the whole nine yards regularly. Does anyone raise an eyebrow? I don't really know, I've never asked anyone. Should I?

[Eryn]

It might not be as thrilling if society accepted us completely, but it would still be satisfying to me.

Consider that wearing dresses and makeup is completely acceptable for 50% of the population. Of those, perhaps 75% avail themselves of those privileges to one degree or another. They most likely do so because they are deriving some satisfaction from it.

[geri-tg.]

I would only continue to dress until my credit card maxed out.

[Sam-antha]

An interesting thought to which I have to say that the thrill as such, while not quite gone, still exists. I like being out, Sam-antha is sort of illegal even nowadays - in the late fifties she most certainly was illegal -. Perhaps there in lies the lure. I doubt it though, since Samantha likes being out, she likes being one of a pair.
So my reply is simply that we would still co-exist and Sam would be happy and thrilled by the prospect of shopping in quantity, but she would prefer to do it in person.
Donni, that surely says that we two would stay apart.
~Samm

[Brittany CD]

Undoubtedly I would still dress.

[Cynthia Anne]

The lady I share this body with says it would make no differance! If there's one thing I have learned in life it's never argue with a lady!

[docrobbysherry]

My dressing has little or nothing to do with anyone else. It's exciting and arousing for ME to create the illusion that I've become a pretty female!:battingeyelashes:

Going out dressed is stressful for me. I don't get a thrill out of it and worse, I look like a man in a dress. I don't that like on ME. On top of that, I must dress to BLEND! Yuck!:sad:

Would I feel more or less like dressing if it was considered "normal"?

At home, I don't think so! Going out? I have no idea!:brolleyes:

[DanaR]

I dress because I like being a girl. It has nothing to do with sex or thrills, it just seems right.

[Vivian Chen]

I'd still dress up. If it wasn't taboo then buying clothes would be a breeze and a whole bunch of us here would be a lot poorer.

[Traceyjo]

Great first post Ambergold. I hope you contribute often from now on.
Yes I certainly would get the same thrill from dressing regardless. The wonderful feeling that descends upon me once I am fully transformed is not related to any stigma associated with crossdressing. I just love doing it immensely.

[Mollyanne]

WOULD I DRESS IN FEMALE CLOTHING ALL THE TIME IF THE TABOO'S DISAPPEARED??????? YES YES YES!!!!!! Whenever I am dressed I REALLY feel that this is who I am, a woman trapped in a male body!!!!!! Just goes to show ya', "GOD DOES HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOR"

MOLLY

[Marlana]

I dress because I feel comfortable that way. Don't get me wrong, I feel comfortable in my male clothes as well. I prefer to wear womens clothes when I can, and I do every night and morning. . If the stigmatism was removed, I would feel way freer(?) to go out in public, buy clothes that I like to wear and fit me properly. I think we all know that is never gonna happen, but what a wonderful dream. Until then, Marlana is house bound.

[deebra]

I would definately dress female fulltime, try it for six months or so and if I loved it go the female hormone, breast implants and some feminizing facial surgery route. In other words I would become a *******, that's as far as I would want to take it, and if I had a change of mind you can undo just about all of this. I think it would be so cool living and presenting as a busty, curvy female with a little surprise tucked away down below in my sexy panties. Imagine the colorful, soft, form fitting clothes that hug all the curves the female body has and the mannerisms of being female, sign me up!!!

[Cheryl T]

[QUOTE=Ambergold43;2910442 I don't want to belabor the point, so my question is this: If crossdressing was completely unstigmatized, and men could buy and wear dresses, make-up, the whole nine-yards without anyone even raising an eyebrow, would you still get the same thrill? Or do you think that at least some of the fun from subverting gender norms would dissipate?[/QUOTE]

It's not at all about a "thrill" for me. It's about expressing something deep inside that's always been there.
No, it wouldn't change a thing except for the fact that I would be able to dress much more often and without concern for family and friends knowing.

[kimdl93]

Aside from the fact that this is an utterly hypothetical that has no realistic possibiity...it would be more realistic to ask how we might spend Powerball winnings... the motivation and response to dressing does change as we mature. As a young person with raging hormones, its not surprising that wearing lingerie elicits arrousal. But I would argue that this is a coincedence for many of us. At that age, getting dressed may be exciting, but so is simply seeing an attractive girl in a picture. Later, once a person matures, that early sexual association may diminish or disappear entirely but the desire to dress continues. At that point, we begin to realize that something else, something deeper in our psyche has been motivatings...very likely the same thing that drew us onto this path in early childhood. At that point, the thrill is irrelevant or nonexistent.

[Tina B.]

Yes I would still be dressing, and if all of that where to happen, I might even go out in public. I don't dress for thrills, or to be anti social, I dress because I'm driven to it, now if I could get that deep seated compulsion to go away, I would quit dressing, but that is the only thing that would ever get me to stop completely.
No matter who approves, or disapproves, just has no effect on a transgended crossdresser. If it's really just a hobby, maybe you have a choice, if it's just who you are, the choice is limited.
Tina B.

[Ally 2112]

I would still dress for me it is the urge the want and the need to do it not the thrill :)

[Kate Simmons]

It wouldn't matter much to me Hon. For myself it's become an art form for the most part and an outside reflection of my inner feelings. I enjoy trying different looks and have the latitude to do so even more than genetic gals. I have a lot of fun with it by dancing en femme also, kind of my trademark. It's who you are as a person that counts, not what you look like.:battingeyelashes::)

[Desiree2bababe]

It would probably become "old hat".

[Leslie Mary S]

"If crossdressing was completely unstigmatized, and men could buy and wear dresses, make-up, the whole nine-yards without anyone even raising an eyebrow, would you still get the same thrill? Or do you think that at least some of the fun from subverting gender norms would dissipate?"

Yes I would still crossdress because it is the feel of the material against my flesh that I enjoy. I do wear forms that make me look a little more female and partly they help fill out my clothes.

The other day a neighbor, who knows that I crossdress, was at my house and was amassed that I could do something she could not, walk in 5" heels without trouble. She also wanted to raid my small wardrobe of about 50 outfits. Lucky we were not the same shoe or dress size. I'm 6' tall (without heels) and weigh in at 230 pounds. size 12W shoes. She is 5' tall weighs in at 150ish (guessing here) and a size 8.5 shoe.

Yes I would go out more if I could.

[Josie M]

definitely, I would love for my presenting as a female to be a total non-issue :)

[ReineD]

If crossdressing was completely unstigmatized, and men could buy and wear dresses, make-up, the whole nine-yards without anyone even raising an eyebrow, would you still get the same thrill? Or do you think that at least some of the fun from subverting gender norms would dissipate?

IF ... there were an equal number of men and women who wore the same style skirts, makeup, and pants, in other words, if there was no gender differentiation between clothing, makeup, or hair style at all, I think that CDers would still find a way to differentiate themselves from the men, even if it meant only wearing the breast forms, hip pads, and waist cinchers, and making sure their bodies were hair free under their clothing.

But, I'd bet the shelves in the closets would be less filled with clothing, and more filled with varieties of forms, pads, and corsets. :)

[Kelly Smith]

I'm sure many of us have gone shopping in the women's section of department stores alone and felt a bit of an adrenaline rush? Just me? Well, if you do know the feeling, thats what I'm talking about.

I don't want to belabor the point, so my question is this: If crossdressing was completely unstigmatized, and men could buy and wear dresses, make-up, the whole nine-yards without anyone even raising an eyebrow, would you still get the same thrill? Or do you think that at least some of the fun from subverting gender norms would dissipate?

Excellent question. Without the adrenalin it would be as pointless - for me - as drinking decaffeinated coffee or alcohol-free beer. If everyone did it I wouldn't go to the bother and expense

[chloe cute]

of course i would gladly do it..

[Frédérique]

I don't want to belabor the point, so my question is this: If crossdressing was completely unstigmatized, and men could buy and wear dresses, make-up, the whole nine-yards without anyone even raising an eyebrow, would you still get the same thrill? Or do you think that at least some of the fun from subverting gender norms would dissipate?

No, I wouldn’t get the same thrill, and the thrill is important. I like having society against US. I can’t imagine a hypothetical “perfect” world where deviants are welcomed by conformists; in fact WE may be the ones who make the world go ‘round. I need to feel different from the next fellow, even if my penchant for crossdressing is not openly apparent – in many ways I exist as a counterpoint to others, and I’m comfortable in that role. I get the feeling that gender norms will always be around, since the world seems to require it and insist upon it. Meanwhile, I, a male, feel a need to do something really interesting to make me happy, something that few other males would even think of...
:battingeyelashes:

[smellymelly]

doubt i could stop even if i tried. the thrill is definately a factor for me, but i wouldn't say it is the reason. it would make it less special though because there would be more guys out there who could pass better than me and that'd be upsetting.

[IngeInCO]

I reckon I would mix and match. When I am feeling masculine I might choose the typical clothes and vice versa. I do think a blend would be fun! Oh GG's already do that so no worries!

[LIKETODRESS2]

NOt only would i dresss stIll I would dresss more, HEll I would dress every day

[Stephanie47]

Dressing fully as a woman does not give me a 'thrill.' Dressing allows Stephanie to feel comfortable as herself when she pushes her twin brother aside and takes over. Stephanie appears when her brother needs some 'down time' from the stresses of life. I am an adherent to the belief there is a vestige of a woman within each of us, and, consequently, a man within a woman. I enjoy my man side and I enjoy my womanly side. If appearing en femme was fully accepted, Stephanie would not have to protect her brother if his outward appearance were adorned in feminine attire. I believe those who do not acknowledge their female side will endure torment through their lives.

[stacycoral]

I dress because I feel comfortable that way. Don't get me wrong, I feel comfortable in my male clothes as well. I prefer to wear womens clothes when I can, and I do every night and morning. . If the stigmatism was removed, I would feel way freer(?) to go out in public, buy clothes that I like to wear and fit me properly. I think we all know that is never gonna happen, but what a wonderful dream. Until then, Marlana is house bound.

different than Marlana, i not house bound, but i love the statement:). I love dressing as a girl, because that is who i am and want to be.:2c:

[danielletorresani]

Part of the thrill for me definitely is the taboo part of it, but it's a relatively small part of the pleasure. I think I'd still dress up, regardless.

[Jolene Robertson]

Great question! I have read this but did not respond (guess I had to digest it for a while). I would still dress (I don't go out but dress at home every day) It makes me feel complete, my wife and I have a more open relationship than ever because Jolene is more in touch with her feelings. When in male mode I have the bred in self defenses (keep everything bottled up) and become very non-conversational. Besides I love the feeling and look of feminine clothes, when young I did all the guy things (baseball, football, wrestling and stuff) but still played with the girls (jump rope, hopscotch and stuff). But it would be great if society changed as I would probably go out.

Hugs
Jolene

[Amy R Lynn]

Being able to dress without hiding who I am? I would LOVE to be able to do that. For me I think there is more to it than just the thrill. It feels right. Don't get me wrong. I still enjoy being a man. So, yes I would still be dressing. I would do it more often, and I'm certain that I would be much better at it.

[Kaz]

Really interesting thread! Thanks for this... I have never thought that I do this for the thrill... I do it because it is me and who I am. BUT!

I am a natural contrary sort of person... give me a rule and I will find a way round it, set me a boundary and I will break it... I am that sort of person! Let's face it, most people live in shallow backwaters and don't experience life... SO

Is my CDing really driven by my need to feel feminine, or am I just a rebel with no particular cause?

[Noel Chimes]

If the stigma of dressing was removed and the lifestyle was accepted as the norm, I personally would dress more often. For me it is not a fetish or sexual thing, dressing is my own personal expression. To be able to dress and go where ever I choose without a thought or care about who sees me would be the ultimate life rush. BTW Karen, who's covering your back?

[washington cd]

My personal thought is that yes I would totally still dress, and would be doing it even more so on a daily basis. As it is right now I just wear things such as panties and have my toe nails painted when I know they will not be seen. Likewise really only wear women's clothing inside the comfort of my home. If those lines between male and female were blurred or even removed all together then I would dress with a bit more feminine style on a daily basis; including panties, finger and toe nails painted, heels or whatever shoes depending on outfit/what will be going on that day and any other feminine styles or male styles I feel like on a given day.

[Cary]

Great Thread!!! Eventhough I have been dressing from many years now, it's all about the thrill. I get excitement shopping for clothes. I love the feeling I get from the act of dressing and being dressed. Since I have only been out dressed twice(both while driving at night), little would change. It would make shopping more fun and easy. I would have better fitting things, but would still be in the house.

[xdressed]

I think I would definitely dress more, if not on a near constant basis lol

[BLUE ORCHID]

yeah but would probably have to add something like robbing banks to compensate....

Hi Karen, I like the way you think.

[Shadowgirl89]

I don't feel uncomfortable in male clothes I just feel abit more comfortable in female clothes and a bit more self assured but the taboo going away would take some of the thrill out but I'd still dress

[Kate's at home]

If the taboo was vanquished...what a thought! Absolute freedom to dress however I wanted when I wanted...and I do think of this periodically.

My response is I would probably quickly evolve a style androgynous in nature with a focus on long dresses and skirts and sweaters with simple and comfortable flats highlighting the feminine side, while bringing in styles and colors reminisicent of a men's wear look for attitude at times. Other days, maybe soft pretty florals. It would be a definite subtle blending with the look of the day reflecting my personality and mood at the time much more fully. Or at least how I wanted to feel.

Hose and hemlines de jour...

What a nice thought to let linger the rest of the day.

Thanks,

Kate

[Joanne Curl]

Oh my gosh yes! I'd pluck my eyebrows to a real femme shape, mow off all my hair, except on my head, pierce my ears and wear make up everyday. I'd love to be able to cross between Joanne and drab and my drab wouldn't be so drab. I'd love it!