Has being a CD changed the way you treat women?

[RachelRoxx]

Hey girls. I was wondering how many of you out the have changed the way you treat ladies since being a CD? I for one have learned a lot about women and their minds. Getting hit on by guys really makes you realise how silly and desperate guys can sound sometimes. lol. And I will never ever complain to my girlfriend that shes taking too long in the bathroom, being a girl is hard work! My respect for girls has gone up exponentially now that I know how tough it is to be a lady. Makeup, hair, nails, painful heels, shaving your body, its a tough gig. lol

[JustineFallow]

I agree pretty much with all of this. I'm quite amazed at how much more often I get hit on by men when I'm dressed than I do by women when in drab. And the amount of sheer graft I have to do to look presentable when dressing up has had the same effect on me re: appreciation of the effort. I also know firsthand now the sheer "ARRGGGGHHHHH!" factor of hosiery that runs the second you put it on!

[erica12b]

It has not changed the way i treat anyone i have always tryed to be kind and curtis , and nonjugmental, (a nice guy) i have always been this way, and i finish last in most things to.

[Amy R Lynn]

I don't treat them any different than I did any othr time. However, I have always had CD'ing tendencies and envied Women. So I guess I had some understanding. When I really started dressing with all the stuff, Makeup, wig, dress, heels, etc... I did get an inside perspective on what it was like. I was quite certain that it was much harder for a Woman to look her best than it was for a guy. So I guess I did get some more respect in some sense, but I still treat them as I always have. With love and admiration!

[RachelRoxx]

Yea like i dont mean, were you an asshole to chicks before but now youre nice, i guess it should have been has your perspective changed. Justine i hear ya, i broke the strap on my favorite heels and almost cried. lol

[Tracii G]

Its not all they go thru to look as best as they can but their entire out look on things.
I knew how I felt about things and was never all boy acting anyway but never really understood how women thought.With the help of a few very close GF's I have learned a lifetimes worth of info thanks to them.
Being part of their inner circle to a degree and them treating me as female only helped me a lot.
I'm no expert still but I tend to look at things much differently now and in a more feminine way and that has been a blessing to me.
Peoples words and actions I read more into these days.

[Amy Fakley]

I've been a closet CD nearly my entire life, so I don't think there's really a "before this but now that" sort of perspective for me.
However, I think it has given me a certain empathy regarding body issues, that I've recognized more than once now that my girls are teenagers. When one of them is emotional and sobbing that they just don't like the way they look ... it touches something in me that I don't imagine your standard dad would have.

[Kaz]

Hey girls. I was wondering how many of you out the have changed the way you treat ladies since being a CD? I for one have learned a lot about women and their minds. Getting hit on by guys really makes you realise how silly and desperate guys can sound sometimes. lol. And I will never ever complain to my girlfriend that shes taking too long in the bathroom, being a girl is hard work! My respect for girls has gone up exponentially now that I know how tough it is to be a lady. Makeup, hair, nails, painful heels, shaving your body, its a tough gig. lol

Great thread, but I don't think that for me this was a 'lightbulb' moment... Over time, the more I have embraced this side of my life, the more I have appreciated what ladies (GGs in this place) have to experience, and also what they are expected to do to 'look good' not only in the eyes of men but also their peers, who are bigger critics (at least in their teens to their thirties)... I have always preferred to talk with women rather than men. I just always felt that I had more in common with them some how.

I love the female outlook on life rather than the boring silly male macho crap. I am not naturally competitive, I am collaborative... I nurture, I do not divide. I am not a conqueror... I am a peace maker... I was present at the birth of my three kids and wished that I could have experienced what my partner was going through so that I could really have been part of it and not just a stupid bloke holding her hand and saying 'push'.

The more I understand the feminine, the more I realise the insanities of stereotypical Alpha male behaviour, yet ironically, the greater my understanding of a female's attraction to the Alpha stereotype... it really is true irony! I am not he... and this starts to explain my whole life....

Yes... my appreciation of women has always been high, but has increased mega-fold since acknowledging my CD 'trait'...

Women are just amazing...!

[monicagurl23]

oh, i TOTALLY have way more respect for women now... not like i didn't before, but i think cding just gives me a little bit more of an insight into girls, gurls, and what morons us guys can be sometimes. that and how on earth do they look so good when theyre walking in heels???

[NicoleScott]

I've been a closet CD nearly my entire life, so I don't think there's really a "before this but now that" sort of perspective for me.

Exactly what I was going to say.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Rachel I don't know I been dressing almost all my life and
my mother taught me to respect women at a very young age.

[Joan_CD]

Hi Rachel I don't know I been dressing almost all my life and
my mother taught me to respect women at a very young age.

My mother and father also taught me to respect people. But I think since starting HRT I empathize with my wife and women in general moreso on an emotional level than I did. I understand now when she would tell me her breasts hurt or she was upset and didn't know why because I now go through it also. When my hormones were raging I felt really off and she said to me not to worry, it's just your hormones. I never felt closer to her than in that moment!

[Rachel Morley]

Well the title of your thread is asking if CDing has changed how we "treat women". To answer that question, no. I treat women the same ... however my understanding of their lives has greatly changed.

My wife Marla tells me that she thinks my crossdressing and especially going out in public presenting as female gives me precious insights that go well beyond what a "regular" non-trans male is aware of, and that she would be the first to sing the praises of crossdressing husbands who do really "get" many things about women that other guys can't.

For example, she loves it that I understand why it can take so long for her to get ready for an evening out; why she just doesn't feel pretty some days despite looking more or less the same as always; why a woman might feel vulnerable when walking to the car late at night. etc etc. All of these things (and more) can make me and other crossdressers who educate themselves much more sensitive to women's feelings, and much more in tune with women's lives than most non TG folks typically are. My bi-gendered life does give me valuable insights into what it "might" be like to be female, but obviously it stops well short of what it's actually like to be a real woman.

[Sally24]

I have to say that Rachel got it just right. My behavior towards women hasn't changed much but my empathy and understanding have. Some of it is trivial things like realizing how many nuances that women's clothing has so that it can take more time and many false starts to get ready to go out. Much of it goes deeper. I've been out late by myself in the city and felt very vulnerable. I experience disatisfaction with my body or face and the frustration that can bring. I've always been more emotional than your average guy but that has probably increased too. I've always been the one guy that ends up in the kitchen with the women and now I realize it was becuase we think alike and have similar interests. I have increased respect for women and how they keep the family and society together.

[Brittany CD]

My behaviour hasn't changed, but my understanding of women has. I have a greater understanding of why my female friends talk about dresses a lot and why after a long night they take off their heels and complain about their feet. That's just to name a couple

[RADER]

My wife says that I am the best husband a girl could want. I guess it is the fact that I
respect women more that some men. The last two weeks, My Wife has been in a rehab facility
recuperating from a minor hart incident, All the nurses and aids, as well as the PT councilor's
tell my wife that I am the best husband they have seen. I guess that is great, but little they know,
that as soon as I hit home, it is off with the DAB and on with my bra, and skirt and top.
Rader

[Lorileah]

I don't treat women any differently. They still scare me to death. :)

I have always tried to e the best I could be especially around women and older people...because both of which I am now.

Really, I don't treat women any different but it has opened my eyes to the kind of stuff they have to put up with. When I first started being "out" about 17 years ago I was amazed how many men thought of me in a different manner and never in a good way. I saw how women were looked at as sexual objects, not beings, objects. And I never realized how many guys thought of themselves as the gift every woman would want.

All the makeup and clothes and heels I don't see as any different though. I and the women have a choice in that and we choose to dress or makeup or whatever. I still hate being late :)

[sissystephanie]

My treatment of women has not changed at all even though I am a longtime CD. I was taught as a young man to treat all people with respect and I still do. My late wife always told other people that I was the best possible husband any woman could have! That was good enough for me, and she knew that I was a CD!!

[Eryn]

I've always been courteous to women, something taught to me by my father. These ingrained habits are some of the hardest to break when I'm out dressed. For example, GGs seldom open a door and hold it for other GGs!

[Callum2000]

I've always had nothing but respect for women. To me, they're beautiful creatures :P If anything. CD'ing has taught me not to underestimate how much women do to look good!

[Frédérique]

I was wondering how many of you out the have changed the way you treat ladies since being a CD? I for one have learned a lot about women and their minds. Getting hit on by guys really makes you realise how silly and desperate guys can sound sometimes. lol. And I will never ever complain to my girlfriend that shes taking too long in the bathroom, being a girl is hard work! My respect for girls has gone up exponentially now that I know how tough it is to be a lady. Makeup, hair, nails, painful heels, shaving your body, its a tough gig.

I’ve always treated females the same since way back when – being a crossdresser has just verified certain codes of conduct, and I have literally “slipped” into the shoes of women over time. I mean I turned myself into someone worthy of respect, in my mind at least, since I do not respect males in a general sense. I feel more respectful of ME when I dress, if that makes any sense – it’s like wearing the persona of someone you admire and becoming HER to a certain degree. Meanwhile, I am overtly conscious of females, their circumstances, their “space,” and their overriding importance…
:battingeyelashes:

[Cheryl T]

It hasn't changed my treatment at all as I was always very respectful and considerate of women.
Now that I've been going out lots I am glad I've always been that way and hope that others treat me in the same way.
As for the shaving, time in the bathroom and such I've always known that it takes us gals much longer than guys to get ready so that was never a thought.

[tonixd]

I've always been respectful, but I've found that it changes the way women react to me!
Story:
I was at my college in some dreadful i-didn't-want-to-get-out-of-bed hoodie and jeans, and one of my girlfriends comes up to me and says "Toni, can you fix my bra?" And I started to... and then it hit me that i was very 'man' at that point, but in this circle of friends I was a social woman.
And it's so much better that way :)

[Katie83]

My first memory of cding is from when i was about 7. So there is no other time in my life to compare how i treat anyone to. I always try to treat everyone politely and respectfully (unless they have given me reason not to). I have a huge respect for women, i don't like the way they get treated by the majority of men or the way they are seen by them, as objects to 'own'.
Katie

[Stephanie47]

I was raised to treat everyone fairly. I was raised with a positive work ethic. I was raised to be a positive part of my community. None of that has anything to do with cross dressing. Being a child for the 1950's and 1960's, I saw many caring people judge others harshly for who they were. I know my parents would not like the cross dresser in me, if they had known back then.

So, my cross dressing has made me accepting of other sexual minorities.

[Marleena]

Being raised by my mom I learned to respect and admire women at an early age. It continues to this day. I won't be taken advantage of though (well not knowingly).:)

[Clorissa]

I have always appreciated a woman’s lifestyle as a CD my adult life. The facial skin care techniques and hair care methods are skills I’m still trying to improve on. And I have a long way to go to improve my social networking skills and maintaining personal contacts.

They know when to slow down and rest. A woman’s lifespan is about 8 years longer. There and are reasons to learn and respect why this is so.

[Beverley Sims]

Having done this gig for many years I have never known any other way to treat women, the only thing I notice is how other males interact with them and that is quite different from me.
Of course!... I DO have a better insight to women because I dress similarly.:):):)

[Pexetta]

Yes it has. I know this sounds pious but seeing them through TG/CD eyes has made me realise that they're real people with real feelings, not mysterious fantastic creatures. 'Why have you been so nice these last few weeks?' asked a female colleague today, which is sort of a compliment and sort of isn't.

[Michaela42]

It has not changed the way i treat anyone i have always tryed to be kind and curtis , and nonjugmental, (a nice guy) i have always been this way, and i finish last in most things to.

Ditto . . . to everything.:sigh::sigh:

[Diane Smith]

I was raised among two generations (mother, grandmothers and great aunts) of strong and independent women who were the finest of role models. On my mom's side, they were also very active in the feminist politics of the day, including leadership roles in organizations like the League of Women Voters and Planned Parenthood. I never had any reason or inclination to treat women as objectified or less consequential human beings in any way. Like many, I identified closely with girls at school and had mostly female friends, whom I treated at least as well as the boys I knew. When among males I was always pointing out their disrespectful and sexist remarks and trying to stand up for the girls' point of view. Since crossdressing was a part of my life from a very early age, I can't say whether it contributed to, or was a consequence of, my respect for women, but it certainly has added some dimensions to my shared experience with them.

- Diane

[JustineFallow]

I've been a closet CD nearly my entire life, so I don't think there's really a "before this but now that" sort of perspective for me.


I came back to this thread because I realized hadn't answered the central question; this nails it.

[kimdl93]

maybe a little. I think I'm a bit more humble and certainly more accepting of other peoples' unique characteristics than I was before I accepted myself as being transgendered.

[katie_barns]

My wife says it has. I don't argue with her. :)

[tara t]

i have always felt the way i do now so the way i treated women was always the same .

[Annaliese2010]

I'm with you on all counts, Rachel. And yea I only associate with girls & m2f tg's. I despise all males.

[sometimes_miss]

Well, I've been dressing up as a girl since I was six, so....probably not.