Conversation at Toledo Pride...

[SandraAbsent]

A celebration for the lgb "T" community...

Me a full-time pre-op standing and talking to a friend who is recently post-op, neither looking anything like men, and suddenly a random man walks up to me, very intentionally and the conversation goes like this...

(man) Is your name Richard?

{For what ever reason at this point my filter is completely turned off. Probably alcohol lol}
(me) What the f%^%$ makes you think its appropriate to ask me a question like that? Do you have any idea of how offensive at this very moment you are being?

(man) I just thought you looked like, ummm.....

(me) I looked like what? Richard? What part if me looks like Richard? Is it my boobs? Do you know many boobs named Richard?

(man) but...but...but...I just thought...

(me) Ohh, I get it. Your name is Susan, because you have a penis. Is that your name sir? Well Susan nice to meet you, my name is Richard. Now go away because you are rude, and you annoy me. {palm in face}

Now anyone who knows me, knows that I am probably one of the most polite, quiet, reserved, soft spoken girls on the planet. Which makes this conversation even more shocking to have come from my mouth. However, being involved with Pride this year has thrust me deep into the leadership in our local LGBT community. What I have learned is that I am disgusted by the way "most" of the gay community treats anyone trans whether it be pre-op, post-op, crossdresser, queer or whatever.

I go to work every day and speak with hundreds of people in my day to day life. 99% of the time I never get misgendered, called "tranny", or asked dumb questions about my personal life, surgical status, or sexual orientation. Nope, this level of rudeness and general ignorance is reserved for when I am functioning within my fellow and supposedly supportive LGBT family. In the last three months, the level in which I have been mistreated is unbelievable and has really left me disillusioned about our supposed family. In the last month, I've spoken with at least a dozen men and women, whom I know for certain are full-time and at various surgical status, and all of them had either been victim of or witnessed the same style of treatment.

Well I have nothing to say really, other than it's shameful.

[Jorja]

And now you know why most transsexuals distance themselves once they are post-op.

[LeaP]

They are no different than any cisgendered person. The presumption of familiarity because of the supposed alliance, coupled with that ignorance, however, loosens the restraints and the tongue.

[noeleena]

Hi,

This is a reason why the intersexed dont care for many of those who attend the group you said about because of wonting nothing to do with those of us who are intersexed. yet the trans community as such did not accept intersexed people ]
both here & iv heard of other places as well.

Yet they say they are inclusive. certinly not intersexed any way.

Our main reason being we have different sets of issues & our surgerys are different, plus other details, & really theres nothing in common .& much the same for the gays they dont have to have hormones or surgerys so why would they be interested most are not,so again nothing in common ,

So im not surprised of what you said,

...noeleena...

[ColleenA]

noeleena, I have a dear friend who is intersex. She says the I in LGBTQI stands for Invisible.