Means of perception

[Inna]

Thread after thread, emotional content galore, slew of opinions............................ARE WE THERE YET!!!!!!!!LOL

But my last thread lead to certain clarity of perhaps understanding in a deeper sense what the heck is going on!

We seem to split on the stealth and embrace of the transient condition called transsexuality.

I wonder and I think I have an indisputable position on this, however I give in to possibility that maybe, just maybe, I am totally wrong :)

So here it goes, in my view, if you were offered absolute womanhood, I wont go into the means of such offer, but if that became real which for some of us it is, I bet you a nulla that you wouldn't look back and embrace being a woman in its totality, transness would not be your call sign!!!!!!!!!

Now I take that there would be fraction of those who just want to be labeled as trans despite possibility, but over all, I think it would be safe to say that majority would embrace and welcome such chance.

And so we come to the point I have written in the previous thread:

Do you allow society to label you TRANS because YOU Want this, or simply because YOU Have NO CHOICE but to accept it??????????

From the perspective of someone who almost made it there, I tell you, there is nothing more rewarding then being taken, look upon as a natural woman.

[Beverley Sims]

Here I go again where angels fear to tread.
How do I explain it. What the heck am I saying this time.
At some point you crossed over, hence the callsign trans.
Once the process is complete you should be addressed as a woman.
Some do not transition well and although they undergo SRS and have lots of hormone treatment they should still be addressed as a woman.
The biggest hurdle is friends from the past who do not understand and still perceive you as your previous self.
If you do not pass 100 percent others in the community that are not familiar with protocol will not see 100 percent woman and so what do they call someone that they know was a man and is now a woman.
I think it takes years of practice to chip off those hard corners especially if you did not start around age 21.
This is why some go back into the closet again as a woman to hide their previous identity.
Life can be enjoyable with past friends as long as you are able to ignore some of the descriptions.
After all they are only words.

[Melody Moore]

At some point you crossed over, hence the callsign trans.
Once the process is complete you should be addressed as a woman.
Only in your perception it is.

There are those of us who recognised we were women NOT trans or whatever other label you
want to apply BEFORE we even started any sort of transition on hormones. Or did you forget that
your true gender identity is defined by what is between your ears, NOT what is between your legs?

[ReineD]

I think there is no choice but to be stealth in societies/areas where transsexuality is not easily accepted. It's a function of how those around us view TSs, and a person's physiology (how manly are her physical features, stature, etc) more than anything else, IMO.

And this is why we have so many disputes within the community. Everyone has different bodies, sizes, backgrounds, life circumstances ... some are well accepted for who they are and continue to function well in their lives while others feel ostracized and want to start over.

[danielleb]

Only in your perception it is.
There are those of us who recognised we were women NOT trans or whatever other label you want to apply BEFORE we even started any sort of transition on hormones. Or did you forget that your true gender identity is defined by what is between your ears, NOT what is between your legs?

I second that.

I took trans as a label that others would apply only because I didn't know how else to state it to the rest of the world. Really, there's no question in my mind about where I stand, I just couldn't reconcile it with the obvious physical deformities. So sometimes rather than having to spill my life story at every turn I just accept that others are going to address me as trans. I'm sure there's just as many that apply gay, CD, or whatever else they want without telling me, and there's nothing I can do about that. If you really have to know, you have to talk to me.:)

[Alyla]

someday, I will become
fluid. leaving behind a state of solidity
gaseous, etheral dissolving in to the sea,
ebbing and flowing between linguistics
and syntax
waiting in the womb
for the transition of my phylogeny
for my noun to become a verb
for my humanity to become human
under the artist's brush
blooming from the pastel dust
setting the barren desert to my palette
looking among the stars
to transition from being,
waiting to just be
breathing the dust of
the future, nutured and
walking the thin grey line of the cosmos
balancing my language, on the tight rope
of tomorrow, and things to come.


My apologies, i am inspired somedays,
alyla

[KellyJameson]

To live in the wrong body is to not ever experience the privacy of being invisible by way of being normal.

It is exhausting and you never feel rested because there is no peace.

I understand perfectly why you want what you want Inna and I
think you are wise to pursue it.

Be careful of disappointment because it takes time to gain what you seek.

We help save the world by saving ourselves.

[Badtranny]

It's like this Inna. I really hate this fantasy stuff, but even if I WERE able to "become" a woman through and through, I would still be a transsexual unless the people in my life were to somehow forget who I used to be as well. I would LOVE to be stealth and never have anyone EVER question my gender but I would also like to flap my arms and fly.

We all have transition goals, and mine is to LOOK stealth. I want to look so convincing that a stranger would never know, but I don't necessarily care if they eventually find out. Even when I look right, there are still so many people (40 years worth) who knew me before, not to mention hundreds of professional contacts over a 15+ year career (and a 10 year career in broadcasting prior) that there is no way I could live stealth without considerable help from a fairy godmother. I suppose I could move away, but I truly love it here, and I've made peace with my reality. It is what it is. I am who I am. I don't mind being associated with the "community" such as it is. At least I'm not a Trekkie. ;-)

[Inna]

It's like this Inna. At least I'm not a Trekkie. ;-)

I simply love the fact that amongst seriousness of psychological weight you find laughter and humor, cause, resistance is futile where no man has gone before.
Live long and prosper!

[arbon]

One day being totally accepted and seen as a woman without the trans would be great, and no more thinking about it would be a dream, just be a woman...of course I would take that.

But it is soooo far away! It is not my reality today. Being trans is a constant in my life, I am reminded of it ALL the time, I just have to look in the mirror, or hear myself talk, or catch someone staring at me, or having someone slip and use my old name or refer to me as a guy, or registering my daughter for something and marking out where "father" goes and putting in parent.

Even with FFS I could never escape that trans identity where I live as to many people knew me before. Maybe someday I can slip away from it but I try to be okay with being seen as transgender or transsexual because that is the way most people perceive me and I don't have control over that.

Each week I go to my womens group , where I am warmly accepted and welcomed, but I know what is still between my legs and how I look and what my past is, and most of them in this group knew that person from the past to, and I know, no matter how nice and accepting they are of me that my experience as a woman is very much different then theirs. Don't know. Still working it all out.

[LisaMallon]

At least I'm not a Trekkie. ;-)

And what precisely is wrong with Trekkies (putting my fighting hat on and firing photon torpedoes towards SF, trust me anti-matter can ruin your whole day)?