KlaireLarnia
08-14-2012, 01:13 AM
http://diaryofacrossdresser.files.wordpress.com/2012/08/teamworksuccesspicnik.jpg?w=620
On a lot of forums you often see people saying it is unfair they cannot dress in public, or that they are not willing to do so in case they get laughed at or get strange looks. People question the terms used to categorise what they do and define people like them (terms like Cross Dresser, Transvestite TransGender, T-Girl etc.). People say they want to be able to dress as they want, or present as female (while still being male physically) or be able to express a more feminine side. Whatever the cause, desire, hope, dream, need is – the one unifying thing that binds them all together is the fact they cannot be unified.
If that sounds like a contradiction, look at it this way: In any great mission or task there has to be a cause to unite behind. The defining reason and goal of the task which people back and fight for. Whether it is sexual freedom, women’s rights, homosexual acceptance, world peace, or the fight against cancer. In every case there is a main target aim, with people doing what they can to progress and aid the cause to it’s finial destination which could be the government of a particular county and the aim to force them to change laws due to public support for a cause. There is always that sense of direction in knowing where to aim and what to aim for. Offshoots and people who look for… alternatvie… methods are often quickly distanced or brought back into line, thus the unity of the group/cause is kept.
http://diaryofacrossdresser.files.wordpress.com/2012/07/pagebreak.png?w=620
This is where the cross dressing world has one of it’s major and perhaps fatal issues. We are not unified because we cannot agree on what we want to achieve out of it. I know there is a general consensus that we want the ability to dress as and in we want – but behind it there is no reason for wanting this and there is no final goal there. When we look at these two items we see:
1) People Cross Dress for many reasons: Sexual, Gender Disorder, Comfort, Understanding, Expression of their female side, because they want to act like a woman, because they want to be part of the women’s world, Because they see no reason why they cannot, etc, etc…
2) While the consensus is that we want to be able to wear whatever clothes we like, when we want; Some people want this freedom while presenting as male, others want this freedom so they can present as female (and in most cases pass/act as female at the same time).
3) When you look at the group we cannot even agree on what to call ourselves. Are we Cross Dressers? Are we Transvestites? Are we TransGender? Are we….. What we are again is split and varied depending on your point of view and how you see each term in relation to your own situation.
Due to the varied reasons for wanting to achieve this target and not having a clearly defined goal we cannot unify behind a common cause. The general public therefore sees that they both involve wearing clothes for the opposite sex & places both sets of people in the same group as it sees the reasons/act/goal as the same – even though on closer inspection they are not.
We therefore cannot unify behind a cause or a name and if anything this causes more harm by showing the disharmony within the group. You only have to look at some posts on the larger cross dressing forums and see how the disharmony shows in the revolving questions over these points. You look at how the two sides argue points because of what they want and the other side does not. But because I present as male, does that mean those who present as female are wrong to do so because it does not help what I want to achieve or am I wrong because I am not willing to try and pass as female and make what they do easier/more acceptable? Answer is neither and both, and again this shows the lack of unity.
Sadly because cross dressing is a very personal thing and something which can be (relatively) well hidden from the world, it has caused it’s own problems and own issues which time will struggle to undo and fix. Unity for now is a dream we cannot realise at this time. I am not saying that progress cannot be made, it can and continues to be made. I see public perceptions change towards how I look and dress, I see occasional stories that give hope in the news – but because we are not unified we cannot rally around these things and capitalise on them, using them to bolster our cause and goal because of our fragmented reasons/aims/goals. This lack of unity runs the risk of being the biggest threat to us all – and not public perception of what we do and why we do it.
Is there an answer to this lack of unity? At the moment no I really do not think there is sadly. I think that we are far to fragmented in what each of us wants to be able to over come this and join together. I have my own opinions of what our problems are and what should be done to correct them so we can unify as a group, but I also know that what I think will not work for a lot of people and therefore fail before it starts. In the future an event may happen that will give us the ability to stand up and unify as a group and I hope that when it does people will see it, know and act quickly before the momentum is lost forever.
http://diaryofacrossdresser.files.wordpress.com/2012/07/pagebreak.png?w=620
Please check out my blog below to see more of what I write and feel.
On a lot of forums you often see people saying it is unfair they cannot dress in public, or that they are not willing to do so in case they get laughed at or get strange looks. People question the terms used to categorise what they do and define people like them (terms like Cross Dresser, Transvestite TransGender, T-Girl etc.). People say they want to be able to dress as they want, or present as female (while still being male physically) or be able to express a more feminine side. Whatever the cause, desire, hope, dream, need is – the one unifying thing that binds them all together is the fact they cannot be unified.
If that sounds like a contradiction, look at it this way: In any great mission or task there has to be a cause to unite behind. The defining reason and goal of the task which people back and fight for. Whether it is sexual freedom, women’s rights, homosexual acceptance, world peace, or the fight against cancer. In every case there is a main target aim, with people doing what they can to progress and aid the cause to it’s finial destination which could be the government of a particular county and the aim to force them to change laws due to public support for a cause. There is always that sense of direction in knowing where to aim and what to aim for. Offshoots and people who look for… alternatvie… methods are often quickly distanced or brought back into line, thus the unity of the group/cause is kept.
http://diaryofacrossdresser.files.wordpress.com/2012/07/pagebreak.png?w=620
This is where the cross dressing world has one of it’s major and perhaps fatal issues. We are not unified because we cannot agree on what we want to achieve out of it. I know there is a general consensus that we want the ability to dress as and in we want – but behind it there is no reason for wanting this and there is no final goal there. When we look at these two items we see:
1) People Cross Dress for many reasons: Sexual, Gender Disorder, Comfort, Understanding, Expression of their female side, because they want to act like a woman, because they want to be part of the women’s world, Because they see no reason why they cannot, etc, etc…
2) While the consensus is that we want to be able to wear whatever clothes we like, when we want; Some people want this freedom while presenting as male, others want this freedom so they can present as female (and in most cases pass/act as female at the same time).
3) When you look at the group we cannot even agree on what to call ourselves. Are we Cross Dressers? Are we Transvestites? Are we TransGender? Are we….. What we are again is split and varied depending on your point of view and how you see each term in relation to your own situation.
Due to the varied reasons for wanting to achieve this target and not having a clearly defined goal we cannot unify behind a common cause. The general public therefore sees that they both involve wearing clothes for the opposite sex & places both sets of people in the same group as it sees the reasons/act/goal as the same – even though on closer inspection they are not.
We therefore cannot unify behind a cause or a name and if anything this causes more harm by showing the disharmony within the group. You only have to look at some posts on the larger cross dressing forums and see how the disharmony shows in the revolving questions over these points. You look at how the two sides argue points because of what they want and the other side does not. But because I present as male, does that mean those who present as female are wrong to do so because it does not help what I want to achieve or am I wrong because I am not willing to try and pass as female and make what they do easier/more acceptable? Answer is neither and both, and again this shows the lack of unity.
Sadly because cross dressing is a very personal thing and something which can be (relatively) well hidden from the world, it has caused it’s own problems and own issues which time will struggle to undo and fix. Unity for now is a dream we cannot realise at this time. I am not saying that progress cannot be made, it can and continues to be made. I see public perceptions change towards how I look and dress, I see occasional stories that give hope in the news – but because we are not unified we cannot rally around these things and capitalise on them, using them to bolster our cause and goal because of our fragmented reasons/aims/goals. This lack of unity runs the risk of being the biggest threat to us all – and not public perception of what we do and why we do it.
Is there an answer to this lack of unity? At the moment no I really do not think there is sadly. I think that we are far to fragmented in what each of us wants to be able to over come this and join together. I have my own opinions of what our problems are and what should be done to correct them so we can unify as a group, but I also know that what I think will not work for a lot of people and therefore fail before it starts. In the future an event may happen that will give us the ability to stand up and unify as a group and I hope that when it does people will see it, know and act quickly before the momentum is lost forever.
http://diaryofacrossdresser.files.wordpress.com/2012/07/pagebreak.png?w=620
Please check out my blog below to see more of what I write and feel.