Mara3001
08-16-2012, 05:20 AM
Hi all. I do not write everyday here, mainly because most of times i don´t know what to say to the "audience".
But lastly, i feel the necessity to express some things that i can´t talk with anyother people around me. So here i am, trying to "calm down" what my head think but my heart can´t explain. My apologies if this sounds too weird. :P
I´m crossdressing since i was 14, i guess. I´ve passed hundred of hours reading about it, i´ve bought loads of clothes by myself (which are hidden by the eternity for now because i share house with my brother), and if you know me, all you would find is a "simple boy".
I do not want to become a woman but what i´ve noted when i´m out with my friends is that i´m not like them. I talk "physically".They are all big, strong and compared to them, i´m quite a joke. I´m a skinny person since i remember. My family always reminds me that i have not fat in anyway. If you think about it, i am 35, 1´70 mts height and my weight is 59kgs more or less. And i like to eat, right? Love meat for example. But i can´t gain weight doing my normal life, like i see. And most important thing is that i don´t want to gain mass for nothing. i´m what i´m, and end road.
So lastly, when i crossdress, i´m beginning to think that i "look better and more natural" when using female clothes. Obviously, i have a man face yet ha,ha,.
I think that the fact to be without a girl near can be affecting me.
If you join all the parts that we have until now, we have a mess in my head quite big.
But the most important thing in all of the crossdressing thing is that i feel alone. That´s the true. I´d love to have a partner with talk about it. A real friend and if possible, a gg who understand me and supports my both sides.
Don´t missunderstand me. I´m not looking for a girldfriend here. That would be crazy. What i´m trying to say is that in my life, and knowing than i´m quite a shy guy, that´s a very very difficult combination to find and happen.
The most valuable thing in one life are friends. And not all the people are lucky enough to count with it. So if you have the luck your life with that special person, congratulations. ^^
Ending this threat, i want to add that i love to crossdress even knowing that is an "out-of-the-line" hobby. Love and hate, because i´ve been educated to search for what all the people do as "normal" (as most of you, i think).
I´d love to talk with other people ,that feels like me or not. My english is quite simple, because is not my language (i´m spanish, living in Spain not in south america, you know).
Thanks for reading me. Thanks for stay there. And my apologies for a very long post.
Best regards from a very very hot summer here...
But lastly, i feel the necessity to express some things that i can´t talk with anyother people around me. So here i am, trying to "calm down" what my head think but my heart can´t explain. My apologies if this sounds too weird. :P
I´m crossdressing since i was 14, i guess. I´ve passed hundred of hours reading about it, i´ve bought loads of clothes by myself (which are hidden by the eternity for now because i share house with my brother), and if you know me, all you would find is a "simple boy".
I do not want to become a woman but what i´ve noted when i´m out with my friends is that i´m not like them. I talk "physically".They are all big, strong and compared to them, i´m quite a joke. I´m a skinny person since i remember. My family always reminds me that i have not fat in anyway. If you think about it, i am 35, 1´70 mts height and my weight is 59kgs more or less. And i like to eat, right? Love meat for example. But i can´t gain weight doing my normal life, like i see. And most important thing is that i don´t want to gain mass for nothing. i´m what i´m, and end road.
So lastly, when i crossdress, i´m beginning to think that i "look better and more natural" when using female clothes. Obviously, i have a man face yet ha,ha,.
I think that the fact to be without a girl near can be affecting me.
If you join all the parts that we have until now, we have a mess in my head quite big.
But the most important thing in all of the crossdressing thing is that i feel alone. That´s the true. I´d love to have a partner with talk about it. A real friend and if possible, a gg who understand me and supports my both sides.
Don´t missunderstand me. I´m not looking for a girldfriend here. That would be crazy. What i´m trying to say is that in my life, and knowing than i´m quite a shy guy, that´s a very very difficult combination to find and happen.
The most valuable thing in one life are friends. And not all the people are lucky enough to count with it. So if you have the luck your life with that special person, congratulations. ^^
Ending this threat, i want to add that i love to crossdress even knowing that is an "out-of-the-line" hobby. Love and hate, because i´ve been educated to search for what all the people do as "normal" (as most of you, i think).
I´d love to talk with other people ,that feels like me or not. My english is quite simple, because is not my language (i´m spanish, living in Spain not in south america, you know).
Thanks for reading me. Thanks for stay there. And my apologies for a very long post.
Best regards from a very very hot summer here...