The Unexpected Benefits of Dressing...

[GeminaRenee]

Here's a topic I think about from time to time:

What unexpected positives has dressing brought about in your life? I'm not really thinking of things like "It makes me happy," or "It gets me in touch with my feminine side" - although, if you didn't expect these things, then I guess they qualify. When I ponder this question, I'm thinking of stuff that I was pleasantly surprised to discover along the way. For example...

-Because I am a crossdresser, I waste less money on junk food. This is a two-fold benefit. Not only am I less likely to buy unhealthy food because I want to continue to fit into all of the clothes I have, but I've also applied a simple rule to any luxury food purchases: I always ask myself "Would I rather have this (Taco Bell/Bag of Cheetos/Carton of Ice Cream), or would I rather spend this money on (Lipgloss/Pumps?Dresses)? Being on a budget, it's an easily self-moderated conversation.

-Because I crossdress, I find it easier to go to the gym regularly. Again, I'm motivated by my desire to look the best I can, and continue to fit into the clothes I have. Also, there are always women there that inspire me to keep working hard to look good, like them.

-Because I crossdress, I've learned how to sew. I don't mean quilting or anything. I just mean when buttons pop and stitches separate, I can't exactly ask my mom to fix my new dress. So I had to learn some basics in an area that I, quite frankly, never would have ventured into had it not been for my hobby.

These are just a couple that come to mind off the top of my head. Has anyone else encountered benefits that they totally didn't expect, but have come to enjoy nonetheless??

[Cynthia Anne]

Cross dressing has helped me be a cleaner and more caring person!

[Brittany CD]

I feel crossdressing has made me a better man and I feel like I understand women better

[RADER]

I feel crossdressing has made me a better man and I feel like I understand women better

Yes; I second that, and add that I am more caring to the other side of the gender gap.
I see Girls as something better than just a sexual attraction. I see them as a special
people with great needs and the ability to love.
Rader

[Marcie R.]

Crossdressing has made me feel good about myself. I excersise, watch what I eat and ride my bicycle frequently to stay in shape. As I am getting older I find these things are necessary to keep a nice shape for my feminine clothes. Looking good takes a lot of work

[bridget thronton]

It has helped learn to control my anger better

[GeminaRenee]

I see Girls as something better than just a sexual attraction. I see them as a special
people with great needs and the ability to love.


No offense but, it took crossdressing to make you realize these things?

[docrobbysherry]

Here's a topic I think about from time to time:

What unexpected positives has dressing brought about in your life? I'm not really thinking of things like "It makes me happy," or "It gets me in touch with my feminine side" - although, if you didn't expect these things, then I guess they qualify. When I ponder this question, I'm thinking of stuff that I was pleasantly surprised to discover along the way. For example...

-Because I am a crossdresser, I waste less money on junk food. This is a two-fold benefit. Not only am I less likely to buy unhealthy food because I want to continue to fit into all of the clothes I have, but I've also applied a simple rule to any luxury food purchases: I always ask myself "Would I rather have this (Taco Bell/Bag of Cheetos/Carton of Ice Cream), or would I rather spend this money on (Lipgloss/Pumps?Dresses)? Being on a budget, it's an easily self-moderated conversation.

-Because I crossdress, I find it easier to go to the gym regularly. Again, I'm motivated by my desire to look the best I can, and continue to fit into the clothes I have. Also, there are always women there that inspire me to keep working hard to look good, like them.

-Because I crossdress, I've learned how to sew. I don't mean quilting or anything. I just mean when buttons pop and stitches separate, I can't exactly ask my mom to fix my new dress. So I had to learn some basics in an area that I, quite frankly, never would have ventured into had it not been for my hobby.

These are just a couple that come to mind off the top of my head. Has anyone else encountered benefits that they totally didn't expect, but have come to enjoy nonetheless??

Interesting, Kali! Many of the things about dressing that have changed u have done the same to me! I've also learned a little about sewing.

However, I eat MORE fast food than I used to because I now eat healthier, less filling dinners with no beer.

I quit the gym when I got serious about dressing. I'm flabbier but weigh less and have less muscle definition now.

By and large the GREATEST THING that has happened since I began dressing was coming out here. And, meeting online and in person, some of the most interesting and amazing "men" and former men, that I have in all my life!

[Tracii G]

Controlling anger and treating other people better.
Treat myself better too.
I have been able to be more understanding of others life styles.Much less prone to judge people based on what they look like on the outside.

[susangirl]

I'm an airline captain and most flight attendants are female. I have a better understanding of what they go through in day to day life. Dressings up, wearing dresses and skirts, fancy pumps, pantyhose and stockings, men making comments and hitting on them. I often wish I could bring my stuff on my trips and spend some dress up time with them but not going to happen. My professional life is going to stay professional.

[Ashley D.]

This is a intresting topic and I have been trying to think of something to add.
it just hit odd but it saved my life and my marriage. When I purged for a long time I whent in to a deep depression. Which almost killed me and made life with me hell for everyone around me. By coming out and getting back to my self I'm happy agen :)

[betty1253]

Hello Kali, One of the benefits for myself has definitely been in my diet. Have lost about 40 pounds since embracing this part of me. Not so much of having the extra money by not buying junk food, but more of a "how will I look in this skirt?" thing.
Betty

[Leslie Langford]

I have come to regard my being transgendered and a crossdresser as a gift, and through it being able to experience life in a way that would not have been possible if only viewed through a male lens. Kind of like being able to see the world in 3D as opposed to in only two dimensions...

I also see it as a condition that is similar to being bilingual and/or bi-cultural, which I also happen to be. Both of these factors expand one's horizons immeasurably, allow one to truly get "inside" the other world as a participant rather than just an observer, and provides the individual with a perspective that makes them far more well-rounded than the average person.

[Michelle (Oz)]

So things like 40lb weight loss in 10 weeks (about half way to target)? My absolute motivation is to look better en femme.

[Mistybtm]

Cross dressing has helped me understand my self and women better.
I feel like my self and at peace when I am dressed up.

[Davena Doll]

Before I dressed. I was thinking how good it would feel to get up in her. Now I look at her shoes, sholders, waist and hair. It is very plain as far as dressing goes. sandels, caprees, T shirt, hair bunched up, WTF. So the Benefit is I look at woman diferently. It's a good thing.

[Beverley Sims]

Yes; I second that, and add that I am more caring to the other side of the gender gap.
I see Girls as something better than just a sexual attraction. I see them as a special
people with great needs and the ability to love.
Rader

You need to know Rader's background to see he has reformed. :)
I feel I have a better understanding of women and the three boys in my life I saw turn into very attractive women.
Their moods, wants, views on life, deciding boys were probably good company.
No I am not gay but receptive to others problems especially the ones that transitioned.
They drove me mad until they got to where they were going. :)
The answer to the question, I am sure I am a better person because of it.

[ReineD]

I'm an airline captain and most flight attendants are female. I have a better understanding of what they go through in day to day life. Dressings up, wearing dresses and skirts, fancy pumps, pantyhose and stockings, men making comments and hitting on them. I often wish I could bring my stuff on my trips and spend some dress up time with them but not going to happen. My professional life is going to stay professional.

I'm reading this thread with great interest, and I just want to say that in my younger years I worked in an office and wore makeup, skirt suits or dresses, hose, and heels every day. I was in my 20s and also got hit on. But I have to say that wearing these things didn't take any effort. It was just routine for me and frankly after I got dressed in the morning I just forgot what I had on. Also it wasn't all that difficult to deflect men who came on to me, whether I smiled at them or ignored them. Very few were insistant to the point of rudeness, in fact I can't remember any bad experiences. I'm saying this because you mentioned "what we go through" and really, it is no big deal when you dress like that all the time, just like men who get used to wearing ties and jackets, and because they look so nice they have women smile at them a lot. :)

-------------------

I also have a general comment about getting hit on or seeing women as sexual objects. I suppose nowadays, it is politically incorrect for a man (or a CDer) to come on to a woman else it might be considered sexual harassment in the workforce at least, but men and women have been sexually attracted to each other and have come on to each other throughout the ages! :) Some people say this is what makes the world go 'round. You know, the birds and the bees and all that. I know that after a certain age this decreases somewhat, but unless someone is creepy, a woman enjoys being appreciated just as much as a man does.

I should think it would be frustrating for a young, single girl to be in a room full of CDers who are more interested in what she is wearing or being her best friend, than her potential for a romantic or sexual attraction. Yes, we want to be respected and all and we certainly don't want to be treated as wh*res, but we also don't want men (or CDers) to treat us like our girlfriends treat us! :)

[Shari]

When I get dressed up, it's like being transported into another world. The nylons, the silks, the click of my high heels, all send me to a place where I love to go and be the inner me, the female side, the soft and sexy side. A completion of my whole personna.
It's very much like a drug where nothing else enters and I can just enjoy the feelings. It's an escape from the real world, if only for a short time.

[Karren H]

Other than looking better.... I can't think of any big advantage in my life.... any small advantages don't come close to negating the disadvantages..... for me... imho....

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Kali, Being a lady has made me a better man.

[linda allen]

I feel crossdressing has made me a better man and I feel like I understand women better

That's it in a nutshell. :thumbsup:

[Veronica27]

I should think it would be frustrating for a young, single girl to be in a room full of CDers who are more interested in what she is wearing or being her best friend, than her potential for a romantic or sexual attraction. Yes, we want to be respected and all and we certainly don't want to be treated as wh*res, but we also don't want men (or CDers) to treat us like our girlfriends treat us! :)

I loved reading your reply to this thread. Men and women instinctively interact with members of the opposite sex differently than they do members of their own sex. They may be hitting on them but also they may simply be engaging in innocent flirting with no ulterior motives. Today's hyper awareness of harrassment issues has made both men and women a bit more reluctant to engage in such non threatening activities.

I find that one of the major advantages to getting old is the increased ability to innocently "flirt" with women such as sales clerks, wait staff, medical assistants and so on, and to have them reciprocate and even initiate such exchanges. That rarely happened when I was younger.

Here's to being a geezer.

Veronica

[krissy]

Its help me control my anger .i also see i can have emotions and still be ok .i can talk about things more.

[kimdl93]

My feeling is that if one gains a degree of self acceptance by coming to terms with being a cross dresser, then that will spill over into other aspects of life. To the extent that CDing motivates a person to adopt a healthier lifestyle, reduces frustration levels or eliminates bouts of anger,then CDing is a positive force. In my case, acheiving a level of self acceptance has positively impacted on my behavior in a number of ways. In particular, I have grown more tolerant of the idiosyncracies of others and less frequently exhibit childish temper tantrums.

[Thera Home]

When I get dressed up, it's like being transported into another world. The nylons, the silks, the click of my high heels, all send me to a place where I love to go and be the inner me, the female side, the soft and sexy side. A completion of my whole personna.
It's very much like a drug where nothing else enters and I can just enjoy the feelings. It's an escape from the real world, if only for a short time.

I ditto that,its a high thats a GOD sent to me. I love it.

Thera

[GeminaRenee]

Thanks everyone for your responses! (:

What's most interesting to me is the implication that some people had to start crossdressing in order to see the complexity and beauty of women as human beings, & to see women as something more than potential d*%$ receptacles. I suppose I've always sort of taken that perspective for granted - while I've always had that sexual attraction to women, I've also always seen them as being very exciting and interesting as people, especially in their differences. This begs this question - should macho jerks be forced to spend some time crossdressing in order to reform poor attitudes towards women? It sounds like something that might work in a movie, anyways! ;)

I guess for me, dressing hasn't negated the sexually charged way in which I view women; it has just added another (very exciting) dimension to it. My covert inspection of eye shadow techniques always takes a second chair to the physiological response that I inevitably experience around a real looker. Still, I think it's a fascinating shift in perspective to not only want to be with an attractive woman that I meet, but to secondarily want to be like her (at least in terms of presentation and appearance) as well.

[outhiking]

I fnd that when I'm dressed I'm much more graceful in my actions and maintain better posture. This was first a conscious effort, but as I get to dress more and more, it's becoming a habit. The improved posture is a definate plus, even when in drab, but I'll have to watch the "graceful actions" :-)

[susan54]

I don't think of myself as a woman when dressed I just act as one. Apart from learning why it takes so long to get ready, why women want to take massive amounts of luggage on holiday and just 'have' to have that new dress, I don't think it has given me any additional insights. I love being with women and listening to them however I am dressed - that's how I have learned about women. However, I have met some lovely women who run women's clothes shops or are beauticians and there is little chance of me having met them without crossdressing.

[JeanneF]

Self-awareness. Dressing, and all the crap that comes with figuring out why you are a boy who likes to wear girl's clothes leads to a level of self-awareness that "normal" people don't have. This can also apply to having a disability (especially one that comes post-birth), sexual orientation issues, personal tragedy at a young age, etc.

Coming to terms with my TG-ness makes me more aware of all of the choices that I make in life, and also helps me to understand that sometimes you just have to roll with what life gives you and make the best of it.

[susangirl]

Reine D. I understand what your saying about dressing every day and it being no problem and feeling great. I love to wear all soft and silky stuff. In my line of work I hear flight attendants complain about their feet after a long day in four inch heels, stockings running, men trying to look up their skirts, men looking through the gap in their blouses to try and see some bra or some breast. I must say, I have been guilty also. I sneak a peak sometimes.

[lauren_m]

It's a little difficult for me to answer this question because Lauren has been a part of me for as long as I can remember, certainly before puberty and the onset of some of my more "traditionally male" attitudes/characteristics/instincts. I do assume, though, that it's helped me to better understand why women have certain feelings, certain proclivities, an addiction to shopping, etc., etc. And though my perhaps-more-feminine-than-typical traits have sometimes spurred me to overcompensate in order to fit in among my male peers, my attachment to the Lauren side of me has emboldened me to stay true to my inner self and embrace activities like cooking, sewing and craft-making that some males may frown upon. So I guess the answer is that, though it is sometimes as confusing as heck, my alternate person brings me a measure of inner peace that I might not otherwise have.

[Paulette]

Being able to let down the macho facade that makes feelings, and being able to respond to emotions that have been repressed since childhood. When I am dressed I am more apt to shed a tear (BTW found that carry a tissue in your purse is a great way to avoid raccoon eye) while watching a sad movie. A major plus is that even now after dressing for so many years I am able to let the water works go while in quasi drab (under dressed ) and not feel foolish, it is just Arnold guy crying from happiness or sadness.