First things First

[Ginger]

Hi All;

I have been having this conversation with my S/O about where to start in my transition. I have just retired and want to start to transition not completely but close to the completed part. I have been following this site for many years and have read many sound pieces of advice. I have the clothes and the wigs and everything else what would you advise ????
Thanks
Ginger

[Sara Jessica]

A vagina???

Just sayin'.

How are defining transition? Clothes and wigs seem like they would be much lower on a transition to-do list.

[Ginger]

That is why I am asking for direction and advice.

[Sara Jessica]

That is why I am asking for direction and advice.

If you are asking a message board membership to define transition for you, then I dare to say transition isn't necessarily for you.

First thing's first, what does your therapist say?

[GaleWarning]

Just how far are you thinking of going?

No need to undergo a full transition, IMHO, especially if you are of retirement age.
Just enjoy dressing en=femme.

[jessicapaige]

If you are asking a message board membership to define transition for you, then I dare to say transition isn't necessarily for you.

Heheheh sorry to the OP but I love your reply.

We need more information on how far you plan to go. Not completely but close? Are we talking permanent hair removal? Plastic surgery? Can't make a map with no destination!

[Stephanie47]

I think you need to define in your mind what you want to achieve. Is it wearing women's clothing exclusively? Does it mean hormones? Do you have a therapist for guidance? And, what does your S/O have to say about it? Is the S/O a recent relationship? Or a long term marriage? There are many variables.

[JohannaSophia]

That is why I am asking for direction and advice.

You have been wearing your clothes and wigs? That is certainly a start, I know what transition means to me, not sure what it means to you but opening a dialog with your Significant Other is a good first step. What is your S/O's gender and sexual flexibility?

If I was talking Transition I would be planning to be full time Girl on hormones at least with breasts and if I were young enough to use it, I would have a genital reassignment. Those are big steps that take a lot of preliminary practice, counselling some time getting used to the idea in each step.

[Badtranny]

I have just retired and want to start to transition not completely but close to the completed part.

You are missing the point of transition entirely. In fact this would be quite offensive to some people, not to me because I just think you don't understand, but basically you are reducing a profound life experience down to something to do now that you have some free time. My first question to you is; Are you closeted? and if so, are you aware that transition requires coming out of the closet?

[noeleena]

Hi,

As youll be aware of my posts i may be a little different yet similer applys . for us its not a i think ill be a woman now because i would like to or just for fun . we are on hormones for life we have blood tests to make sure we dont have cancer we do mamogrames .

For my self & Jos we went through ....HELL.... just so i could live yes i may be intersexed as i said a little different yet i was some way towards being who i am just not quite compleat its not a joy ride of just getting in a car & off you go its bloody hard to say the least.

For me its not about clothes never has been its about being as whole as i can be with what we have, yea my birth did not include all that i needed to have my child so its very different for us who dont have the nesersay .

i paid for all of my surgerys & that was at a cost,both phyiscaly & mentaly. apart from a lot of other changes, & with in family a lose i still may have to bear i hope not,

You see we dont just do a change because its the thing to do its our lifes at stake here.

Okay ....... if you wont or need help we can only go so far......... my ?..... will be are you a woman ........ if yes then this is a totaly different matter. when you can say yes & youv allways known then the tread mill walk will be very different.

Im 65, a female / woman from long before my birth & a woman in the makeing . well was , i am a normal woman, & im wired in such a way its who i am .

& yes i do have some male about who i am & again that keeped me from going under for keeps. or stoped me from going insane.

Any way for what it may be worth to you,

we are born this way....its not a tack on, its for real.

...noeleena...

[monalisa]

Probably have a long conversation with your wife and see if she is ok with the change or will be packing to leave which will give you much more closet space. Next throw away all your male clothing so there is no turning back. Then buy some large mirrors to see how the transition looks and a camera to record the change for history and friends and family.

[CINDYO]

transition- meaning change into a women, not the clothes, but the hormones, surgical breast implants and lower SRS to resemble a womans anatomy. ie male parts removed, female part constructed by a plastic surgeon. To live completely everyday as a women, mind and body, no going back. $$$ involved and surgery ++. Or are you just talking about shaving and wearing female clothes, wig, makeup. Here in lies the confusion for most.

[Sally24]

Since you've been on this forum for 5 years and this is the first thread you've started I have to assume you are in the closet. That being said, are you referring to 24/7 or transitioning? 24/7 can be just wearing the clothes and forms and wig all the time without considering any permanent changes. If you really are considering transitioning then you are talking about hair removal and probably a surgery or two or three.... Since it doesn't sound like you've done much research I would expect that you probably just want to dress 24/7. If so, just do it!

If you are thinking about anything else your first step should be a gender councilor.

[BRANDYJ]

If I had to guess, the OP has been living vicariously through this site and from doing so, has driven right slap into the middle of a dense PINK FOG. All good advice so far. Especially to define what the OP means by transition. I don't think the OP has a clue as to what that means to those that are in fact TS. The mere mention of having the wigs and clothes is the tip off. Sad, but I think the OP is living in fantasy land. Five years a member here and only 31 total posts? Honestly, I do think the OP needs a counselor, but not one to help through the life altering phases of transition. I am thinking of his poor wife and how she must feel.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Ginger , How many years have you been dressing and do you go out dressed??

[kristinacd55]

Hi All;

I have been having this conversation with my S/O about where to start in my transition. I have just retired and want to start to transition not completely but close to the completed part. I have been following this site for many years and have read many sound pieces of advice. I have the clothes and the wigs and everything else what would you advise ????
Thanks
Ginger

When I read the title, I thought this was an AA post :) It's hard to define what to advise when you don't know where ur at with your "transition". There are sooooo many different definitions of transition that you just have to go with what you feel you want to do. Also, when you say the term, usually you think of hormones, or srs, so without more info it's hard to give any advice.

[Ginger]

Hello Every one

Thanks
for the in put but let me explain, be to a doctor for many years. She says I am transsexual and told me if i WANT TO START hrt LET HER. I am about ready to start the HRT not quite sure about implants, wife is not keen on them but could be interesting to see how big my breasts grow. I have been giving it a lot of consideration as to an orchi. Wife does not want me to completely cut it off. SOOO here I am asking for guidance as I feel there is much experience from you all. I am not closeted as I have been out while dressed. I guess I could use a good makeover or something but where else should I start. My wife is very supportive and I think she is the greatest for dealing with it, however it is also to her advantage as we shop together. She is not very fashion wise and could use a makeover herself for a lift in spirits. Please give me some direction
Thank You
Ginger

[Bree-asaurus]

Do things a little at a time. Meditate on the subject and think about what YOU want... deep down inside... and do it.

You don't need to suddenly decide to transition and you should follow your heart (so to speak) rather than asking others what to do because you "want to transition."

If you think you want to transition, you're going to have to live in the world as the person that you are. That's what transition is. So, if you say you are a woman, then do what you need to do (makeup, wigs, cloths, whatever) to present as the person you feel you are. Then, walk out the front door.

[Sara Jessica]

I'd probably start with a second opinion.

Really, nothing you are describing sounds remotely TS. Being a woman is not about how big your breasts might grow, or the advantage of staying married to your wife so you can shop together or give her a (needed???) makeover. This might sound harsh but what does she care if you "cut it off"? It won't work after hormones anyways.

[Bree-asaurus]

I'd probably start with a second opinion.

Really, nothing you are describing sounds remotely TS. Being a woman is not about how big your breasts might grow, or the advantage of staying married to your wife so you can shop together or give her a (needed???) makeover. This might sound harsh but what does she care if you "cut it off"? It won't work after hormones anyways.

I might agree, but who am I to say. A good way to find out is to just do it.

As for what the wife cares about the OP cutting off their junk, I think that's a silly question. Society places HUGE emphasis on genitals. Is it right? I don't think so... but I understand where she's coming from.

[Sara Jessica]

Just as I agree with what you said Bree. I guess two different views of the same thing.

[Marleena]

Ginger I'm surprised you're asking us. Most TS women know what steps to take and plan it out. So you're saying your doctor will start you on HRT. Why not start with that since you're wife is okay with it? If the breasts are not large enough (give it at least 18 months) then decide on implants or not along with your wife. It's not a race to the finish, it takes time. In the mean time do some research on being TS, Google is your friend. Sara and Bree are saying basically the same thing as me.:)

[Ginger]

Thank You for you advice
Ginger

[Marleena]

Here's some good reading for you: http://www.avitale.com/FAQ.htm#category 6

[linda allen]

Ginger, I think you need to see a gender therapist. Someone who specializes in treating people with issues such as yours.

It's OK to ask for advice, but remember we are strangers, we don't know you, we don't know your history, we don't even know how old you are.

As for transitioning but not completely, it sounds like your plan is to end up as a woman with a penis that only functions for urinating. What's the point in that? If you're going to take hormones and live as a woman, you might as well go all the way. Otherwise, you haven't "transitioned", you're just left somewhere in the middle.

[Beverley Sims]

To transition just because you have more time to do it does not seem genuine to me.
It needs utter devotion and LOTS of commitment.

[Bree-asaurus]

It needs utter devotion and LOTS of commitment.

And strength, and a thick shell, and patience, and strength.

Oh, and did I mention strength? Transition is no cakewalk. It's something people do to survive, not to have fun.

[linda allen]

I watched a documentary on TV a few years back on people who had gone through SRS. I remember one male who went to female (pretty hot looking, I might add), then got tired of it and went back to being a (gay) male.

I'm sure this was not only costly, but in the end, he was not a complete man. Imagine explaining this to a potential lover.

I would think undergoing SRS to become a woman ("transitioning") would be the biggest and most important decision one could ever make in a lifetime.

[Marleena]

I would think undergoing SRS to become a woman ("transitioning") would be the biggest and most important decision one could ever make in a lifetime.

Oh for sure it is Linda! The thing is if Ginger's doctor is willing to start her on HRT she has had to have been diagnosed. No doctor will prescribe it without proof as there are standards of care for TS people. The members that have said to proceed are only saying so based on that assumption.