But this is a womans shirt....Ohhhhhhhhhh, yuck!

[Inna]

I just had another sort of psychological premonition into the question of how many of us are really out there who do NOT even realize they are TG.
So this comes from observation and might be totally misguided however, I have observed this behavior on numerous occasions and it simply tickled my want-to-know!

I observed on few occasions when a male either friend or family member would had been asked or simply had adorn them selves with an article of clothing not from their gender rack.
In all the cases when confronted they became embarrassed and very quick to act on the issue. When many times asked to be the representative of the opposing gender on Halloween night they would profusely refuse to a multiple suggestions that they would simply make a cute girl.
There was one instance when personally known to me individual was absolutely fine with his understanding of gender and they owned their masculinity to the fullest, when he was asked to be a girl on Halloween he jump to the occasion and fulfilled her shoes immensely well, that is for a very masculine guy that he was!

at that moment I was confronted with the same proposal but refused stringently against such travesty even though inside I was disappointed in my self. But I was protecting a secret so immense that if visible to others would had devastated my life, or so I thought.

So that prompted my guess: If all these man refuse such proposition what are they hiding or are afraid of, it is all in the spirit of fun and goofiness, for one I knew I was simply terrified of that scenario and so were the rest of refusing males I have observed, except for the ones who were fine within their gender fix and played along with the crowd.

How many man are out there who feel femininity, yet deny every ounce of it, thinking that such is simply a travesty and a grave danger???????

[Jeanna]

It's really sad Inna but then again am I a real man?

[abby39]

I just had another sort of psychological premonition into the question of how many of us are really out there who do NOT even realize they are TG.
So this comes from observation and might be totally misguided however, I have observed this behavior on numerous occasions and it simply tickled my want-to-know!

I observed on few occasions when a male either friend or family member would had been asked or simply had adorn them selves with an article of clothing not from their gender rack.
In all the cases when confronted they became embarrassed and very quick to act on the issue. When many times asked to be the representative of the opposing gender on Halloween night they would profusely refuse to a multiple suggestions that they would simply make a cute girl.
There was one instance when personally known to me individual was absolutely fine with his understanding of gender and they owned their masculinity to the fullest, when he was asked to be a girl on Halloween he jump to the occasion and fulfilled her shoes immensely well, that is for a very masculine guy that he was!

at that moment I was confronted with the same proposal but refused stringently against such travesty even though inside I was disappointed in my self. But I was protecting a secret so immense that if visible to others would had devastated my life, or so I thought.

So that prompted my guess: If all these man refuse such proposition what are they hiding or are afraid of, it is all in the spirit of fun and goofiness, for one I knew I was simply terrified of that scenario and so were the rest of refusing males I have observed, except for the ones who were fine within their gender fix and played along with the crowd.

How many man are out there who feel femininity, yet deny every ounce of it, thinking that such is simply a travesty and a grave danger???????

Ever ask a man to hold your purse for you when in a bar or department store? It's like you just asked them to shoot their mother. Funny stuff!

[kimdl93]

... asked to be the representative of the opposing gender on Halloween night they would profusely refuse to a multiple suggestions that they would simply make a cute girl...confronted with the same proposal (i) refused stringently against such travesty even though inside I was disappointed in my self. But I was protecting a secret so immense that if visible to others would had devastated my life, or so I thought.

How many man are out there who feel femininity, yet deny every ounce of it, thinking that such is simply a travesty and a grave danger???????

I have been in this situation more than once and before I started to come out, I always was embarrassed to the point of turning red and denied adamantly ...I certainly did protest too much!

[Pexetta]

I have been in this situation more than once and before I started to come out, I always was embarrassed to the point of turning red and denied adamantly ...I certainly did protest too much!

Me too. Plenty of times I've said 'Nooooooo!' when I was thinking 'At last!'

[Marleena]

Ever ask a man to hold your purse for you when in a bar or department store? It's like you just asked them to shoot their mother. Funny stuff!

Oh boy can I relate to this..I would rather pick up dog poo with my bare hands whenever my wife wanted me to hold her purse. I would not wear anything closely resembling women's clothes and hated pink! I was playing the macho role full tilt while I was in denial. Guess who loves pink and carries a purse now?

[Tammy V]

I was so afraid people would see through me and figure me out I would avoid any hint of feminity also. I couldn't be macho, the best I could pull off was neutral but I tried very hard not to be percieved as feminine. Now the average guy being afraid of that perception I understand, but not as much. If he is comfortable in his gender and masculinity it shouldn't be such a big deal. I guess this is what society expects, but few women would be repulsed from putting a man's shirt etc. for some legitimate reason

[JohnH]

All of this stuff is due to the crap that boys have to endure as they are growing up:
1. Boys don''t wear that.
2. Boys don't do that.
3. Be a man

Poor males are raised to be neurotic about wearing feminine items. That tripe listed above should be regarded as child abuse!

John

[LeannL]

I remember as a Cub Scout, our den was planning on putting on a skit of songs from the 20's, 30's, and 40's (it was during the 50's) and I absolutely refused to take one of the female parts. The den mothers ended up having to change the skit because of me. So I definitely fall into the category you describe.

Leann

[ReineD]

How many man are out there who feel femininity, yet deny every ounce of it, thinking that such is simply a travesty and a grave danger???????

I think this depends on their age and also on their level of self-assurance.



All of this stuff is due to the crap that boys have to endure as they are growing up:
1. Boys don''t wear that.
2. Boys don't do that.
3. Be a man

Poor males are raised to be neurotic about wearing feminine items. That tripe listed above should be regarded as child abuse!

John

Right. It begins pre-puberty when boys seem to unilaterally agree that all girls have cooties. I think it peaks during the teenage and early adult years, while they're establishing their pecking orders in the male world. Even then, some boys will be confident enough in themselves (they know they are popular and well-liked, or they have a strong inner core) to not fear defying social convention, but I think this is rare. I've known some younger men who did not feel their masculinity was threatened if they did things that many boys would never do, such as parody a woman on Halloween. Or even go shopping with their girlfriends! :)

But as they age, it changes. More husbands will be willing to hold their wife's purse, or run to the drug store to buy personal products, than younger or single men perhaps (unless they are hiding a secret). And I think that most men mellow out about this stuff even more as they pass middle-age.

Does this mean that as most men age, they will discover they want to wear the feminine clothing themselves? I don't think so, unless of course they've been attracted to feminine things at a personal level all along.

[Barbara Ella]

Yes, it is programmed. I now know my father played a role in having me suppress my feminine interests in drawing the female body as a teenager. I did not cross dress, but I now believer this was my may of being close to the female form without clothes. So for 65 years i was the typical male, avoiding anything female, but staring and admiring and coveting the female form at every chance. Now i relish holding my wife's purse when we are out, and probably annoy her as I hold it in the most feminine way I can at the moment.

Barbara

[Traci Elizabeth]

Ever ask a man to hold your purse for you when in a bar or department store? It's like you just asked them to shoot their mother. Funny stuff!

See I never had that problem. Whenever my wife went into a dressing room, she would hand me her purse and I would sling it over my shoulder and continue looking at women's clothes until my wife came back out of the dressing room. It never phased me in the least. I guess that says a lot about me. But what, I don't know. LOL

[Bree-asaurus]

Ever ask a man to hold your purse for you when in a bar or department store? It's like you just asked them to shoot their mother. Funny stuff!

Haha! I would always hold the purse, no problem, cuz I was a 'nice guy' but I would always be freaking out that someone would see me and somehow make the connection between me holding a purse and being a woman inside! lol...

Then again... I was always afraid of people somehow reading my mind and finding out who I really am... so maybe I'm just nuts.

[Badtranny]

I've talked about this before. Most men are secure enough in their masculinity that they aren't worried about impugning it. I on the other hand was NEVER secure in my masculinity so I would avoid anything that would cause my manliness to be questioned. Even stuff that is not exactly feminine like cooking or decorating anything. Today I'm always intrigued when I see a big macho guy who seems to be sooooo protective of his manly image. I know what I was hiding.

[melissaK]

Yea Reine's self assurance thing applies. When in deepest denial, I wouldn't hold a purse or shop with my wife in women's wear. Other times in my life when I wasn't married and was giving myself some permission to act how I felt best, I had no problem shopping in women's wear for jeans and t's, and I carried a hipster man's purse, and wore my hair 2' long.

Also, I do think the idea that if we participate our secret gets out is true. One Halloween, when in mixed denial, (a tributary river that flows into the deep D' Nile river), I borrowed my wife's Danskin top for a costume It was sooooo wonderful. My wife saw that in my eyes and made me give it back as soon as the costume came off, with some snide comment of derision.

Now, my wife's snide derisive comment ALSO proves the point. Years later she came clean that she wanted to be a man. Yes she was as lost in the d' Nile river system as me.

Hugs,
'lissa

(and for clarity those are stories about ex- wives, not current wife)

[EnglishRose]

Ever ask a man to hold your purse for you when in a bar or department store? It's like you just asked them to shoot their mother. Funny stuff!

Haha, I used to hold one like there was a ticking bomb about to go off!

[Inna]

Haha, I used to hold one like there was a ticking bomb about to go off!

Well in the sense......."There was one!!!" LOL

[JohnH]

After my voice deepened I had very few issues of being manly. No one teases a man who has the speaking voice that is like Johnny Cash, a voice I keep to this very day!

John

[Kate Simmons]

Good question Inna. My answer would have to be: "Call me anything but never 'late for dinner'".:battingeyelashes::)

[Jay Cee]

Oh boy can I relate to this..I would rather pick up dog poo with my bare hands whenever my wife wanted me to hold her purse. I would not wear anything closely resembling women's clothes and hated pink! I was playing the macho role full tilt while I was in denial. Guess who loves pink and carries a purse now?

I soooo hear you, Marleena. Sounds a lot like me.