The Gender Gap

[Brianna612]

My question is being a CD and having two sides both male and female, do we have a better understanding of the gender gap?

Personally I believe that I do. In my early years there was a definite separation of my male and female sides. As I have grown, both of my sides have grown closer together with my female side slightly stronger. My male side was harsh, rude and mad where my fem side is calming, caring and understanding.

When my SO is having a problem, my instant response is to offer a solution then I realize that she just wants someone to listen. I understand getting ready to go out involves the right outfit, the right makeup and the right accessories. In male mode I would just slap something on and wonder what was taking so long. I care more about cleanliness and neatness where my male side would throw everything on the floor. I’m pickier about décor than my male counterpart. I understand being able to let meaningless things go with out a fight where my male self would run someone off the road for cutting me off (and I have).

On the other hand my female side would never understand why the male needs to wash the truck every week, sweep the driveway and have a big screen TV, microwave and fridge in the garage (theater seating would be nice also).

[StephanieT]

I am fully convinced that I WILL NEVER understand a FEMALE. Hormones or whatever I WILL NEVER understand.

[Bree-asaurus]

My male side was harsh, rude and mad where my fem side is calming, caring and understanding.

Well... if you think to be male is to be harsh, rude and mad and to be female is to be calming, caring and understanding, I'd say you don't really understand the gender gap at all.

All you're talking about is stereotypes. Believing stereotypes is quite the opposite of understanding.

[max]

^^^^
What Bree said +1

[Erica2Sweet]

In my adventures, I don't think I've made any sort of significant strides in better understanding women's thoughts, feelings or motivations. Having never actually been a woman, I still find myself looking in from the outside when it comes to understanding the female mind and soul, and to this day it's still a "grass is greener on the other side" experience for me.

Personally I think a lot of the talk we read and hear about regarding crossdressers finding better understanding of women today is well-intentioned wishful thinking. As long as we have the option of taking off the makeup and pretty shoes and opening a beer as a guy, we simply are not in a position to comprehend what its like to be a woman from a first person perspective.

I have, however, made some interesting discoveries in how others treat someone they perceive to be a woman, as opposed to how they behave toward a man.

Interestingly I find I learn a great deal more about women by simply listening to my wife when we compare and contrast us vs. them.

[sometimes_miss]

I think that most of us over estimate how well we can empathize with GG's. No matter how much we learn, there will still be a huge difference in how we grew up, and how we see the world. As much as we might like to think that once we're dressed up and feeling 'oh so feminine', we feel exactly like a REAL girl does, well, we don't. Men and women see things differently; it's genetic. Sure, there well be a small percentage of guys who are closer to thinking and behaving female, and vice versa, but in general, boys think like boys and girls think like girls.
References about how and why can be found in books by: Alan and Barbara Pease, Leil Lowndes, Timothy Perper to name a few.

[NathalieX66]

I am fully convinced that I WILL NEVER understand a FEMALE. Hormones or whatever I WILL NEVER understand.

Being female has a hundred worth of sensory experiences that males will never experience. That's what I find so fascinating about women.
Testosterone has this odd effect of prohibiting these sensations. Go to youtube and type JennaMarbles, she is in the elite top ten of youtube videobloggers.
Example:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CtuJAs7hSaA&list=UU9gFih9rw0zNCK3ZtoKQQyA&index=4&feature=plcp

[Bree-asaurus]

Being female has a hundred worth of sensory experiences that males will never experience. That's what I find so fascinating about women.
Testosterone has this odd effect of prohibiting these sensations. Go to youtube and type JennaMarbles, she is in the elite top ten of youtube videobloggers.

Women ain't special... just different.

[Brianna612]

Well... if you think to be male is to be harsh, rude and mad and to be female is to be calming, caring and understanding, I'd say you don't really understand the gender gap at all.

All you're talking about is stereotypes.

I guess I’m pretty stereotypical since I was stating my actual personality, very simplified.

[Brianna612]

As far as understanding the female gender completely, it never will happen, heck I don’t even completely understand myself and never will. Always learning.

[Sandra1746]

It's the macho-men who are different.

It is all a matter of perspective,
Sandra1746

[Bree-asaurus]

I guess I’m pretty stereotypical since I was stating my actual personality, very simplified.

Well if you are saying that you are a brutish, caveman of a man and a calm, whispering willow of a woman, then maybe... juuuust maybe, you embody all those attributes you describe??? The cloths don't change who you are. You're simply allowing certain feelings to be expressed when you're dressed as a man, and others when you're dressed as woman.

Maybe you are both harsh and rude and mad and calm and caring and understanding all wrapped up in the same person? Maybe it's your personal issues that you're learning to deal with that make you think you need to fit stereotypes at different times?

[ReineD]

My question is being a CD and having two sides both male and female, do we have a better understanding of the gender gap?

A person who notices the existence of a gender gap is one who has not crossed it. Once crossed, then it no longer exists.



Interestingly I find I learn a great deal more about women by simply listening to my wife when we compare and contrast us vs. them.

Well said.

[suchacutie]

When my wife and I discovered Tina, we immediately started to try to figure out what influence Tina had had in my life even though we had not recognized her, per se.

That conversation quickly moved (required?) to areas of our personal experiences growing up as a boy or a girl. We had never talked about that in depth, but now that we were trying to tease the details of Tina out of my life experience we were looking for overlaps or any common ground where our experiences ovelapped. The major point of our discussion was to realize that growing up as one gender or the other might as well be like growing up on two separate planets! We shared experiences and ideas that we had both thought were common in our lives and found out that they were not common between us at all! In fact, very little was common when it came to emotions, expectations, psychology, desires, and the expectations of others! We began to wonder how the genders actually learn to interact at all!!!

Tina has opened up so many new frontiers for us and made us immensely more communicative because we no longer take anything for granted.

This afternoon Tina arrived after 50 minutes of transformation. The first thing my wife asked Tina was, "so Tina, what's new in you life?". We strive to help each other know what it's like to be the other gender, and it's just fabulous!

currently Tina!