Tricks for pushing yourself?

[Pamela girl]

If some of you are like me you will want to go out and dress up but just can't make that step out.
Years ago I was away on business in a motel and wanted so bad to go out of the room further than the drink machine around the corner. When I checked in I got 2 keys and left one in my car which was in the parking garage then proceeded to do the very best job I could dressing and doing my makeup and getting my hair just right. I did make more than one trip to the drink machine and back to the room and then decided I was ready. I stood there for what seemed like forever with my purse in one hand and the door in the other knowing one key was in the room and the other in my car, knowing if the door closed all the way I was committed and could not change my mind. Knowing I would have to get on the elevator get off and cross the lobby to get to the parking garage then come back in and up the elevator.
I closed the door just a little more still not sure if I was ready or not then I think I heard the loudest click ever as the door latch caught and there was no changing my mind now. Wow what a rush! My heart didn't quit pounding for a while.
Are there any other tricks some of you use to push yourself?

[NathalieX66]

Are there any other tricks some of you use to push yourself?=

Yes, find others like yourself.

Join a support group, or meetup group[ and hopefully if you are lucky to run across someone that invites you to some place . Just go.

I started out Day One with Tri-Ess, and , the next thing you know I was drinking with cd'ers in a hotel bar that was full of military personnel, and they just didn't give a 'at's rass about a half dozen guys in dresses. I also went to a nearby all-night diner with the same crew, but it is near a drag strip, and once in a while me and my gang got funny looks, but the staff treats us like celebrities.

Nowadays I go anywhere, and everywhere o my own, and with people. I have been treated wonderful. It took a lot of nerve to get here , but I'm here.

[Melissa Rose]

One of the best ways to get out for the first few times is to go with someone who is experienced at it. It is amazing how their experience and confidence empowers you. Everything is not as scary since they figuratively take you by the hand and lead you. They know the safe places to go, can tell you what to expect, calm your nerves and soothe your fears, can go to the restroom with you, etc.. It makes a huge difference compared to trying it on your own. You are much braver and tend not to lose your courage when you are with someone else. One of the best places to find a friend like this is by joining a local transgender group and making a few friends. I take part of a program we call New Girls Night Out, and it is designed specifically to get new girls out accompanied by an experienced hostess. It really works.

[Jeanna]

Hye sometimes circumstances push you too. I remember being at a hotel, left my room and had forgotten my card for the door lock. That's right, I had to go to the front desk (enfemme) and ask that they could let me back in. The young lady was discrete and helpful but I almost shi! my pants.

[Tracii G]

Seeing you are from West Ky I was in Owensboro several years ago on business in drab.Did my business then hit the Wal Mart and found a nice outfit on the casual side.
Had my wig and make up in the car so thought what the heck have some fun.
Make up looked good so I ventured out for some BBQ ate dinner did more shopping and drove back home in girl mode!! It was a great day.
Just packing the wig and make up was enough to push me over the edge.LOL.

[Kate Simmons]

Well, I suppose I could have come up with a bunch of convoluted Jedi mind tricks to push myself but all that would ever come to my mind was JDI (just do it). Simple enough I guess.:battingeyelashes::)

[Cindy_Act]

Good for you. I can really relate to just how you felt. I don't think there is any trick to getting out...it's a matter of gaining confidence by taking small steps at a time. Next time a walk along the street then eventually a bar or pub. But pick your venue carefully and make sure it's crossdresser friendly. For me, I found it much easier to go out for my first time by going to a Transgender ball. I stayed overnight at the hotel that hosted the ball so when the door closed behind me...I was immediately amongst friends. But even so, that first step out took all my courage. Check out your local Transgender groups see what they have on...Best of luck with your future outtings.

[PretzelGirl]

I don't believe there are tricks either. I think you had made up your mind and the trick was just part of making it work for you. I was lucky in that a pretty young lady took me around while she was dressed and I wasn't and showed me how easy it was to interact with everyone and have fun. It was shortly after that I went out for the first time by myself and I haven't looked back. I think mentoring is a great way if you just can't kick your own butt through the doorway.

[jessicapaige]

I've seen this topic a few times, and no one has mentioned what I'm loosely planning to do... I think an LGBT club might be a good place to start? I think then if you slip up, don't have your voice right, or whatever else you won't have to feel out of place. Does anybody have experience on this?

I do want to find a partner in crime for my first night out, wherever it's going to be.

[Persephone]

I closed the door just a little more still not sure if I was ready or not then I think I heard the loudest click ever as the door latch caught and there was no changing my mind now. Wow what a rush! My heart didn't quit pounding for a while.

Sounds like a good plan! For those that are thinking of using Pamela's strategy, I would strongly suggest that you make sure that your car key is in your handbag before you hear that click!

On the other hand, if your car key is on the other side of that door, you may have the even greater experience that Jeanna described! :)

Either way, you win!

Hugs,
Persephone.

[reb.femme]

I closed the door just a little more still not sure if I was ready or not then I think I heard the loudest click ever as the door latch caught and there was no changing my mind now. Wow what a rush! My heart didn't quit pounding for a while.

I think as others have said, you were going anyway, you must have been teasing yourself. :heehee:

I know the heart pounding bit only too well. When I saw the receptionist first time out, I walked into an imaginary glass wall. Just took a minute of self collection and set mind to 'what the hell mode' and back I went, bold as brass.

Another of life's obstacles pushed aside for you, so well done and another sister hits the streets.

Reb

[Kate T]

I've seen this topic a few times, and no one has mentioned what I'm loosely planning to do... I think an LGBT club might be a good place to start? I think then if you slip up, don't have your voice right, or whatever else you won't have to feel out of place. Does anybody have experience on this?

I do want to find a partner in crime for my first night out, wherever it's going to be.

A good idea. But go with a friend, GLBT club or not. Girls don't go out alone to bars or clubs for a reason.

As far as "tricks", the trick I think is to be happy with yourself, not really give a toss what others are thinking of you. Being "out of town" is a good way to do this. After a while I think most people just don't tend to notice you to be frank.

[Paula_56]

I've used a variation of this trick, I leave both keys in the room this forcing myself to the front desk. Nowadays, I just stop at the front desk on my way out and ask for directions or a bottle of water.

[Cheryl T]

I went to our support group for the first time and after the meeting one of the girls said, "ok, who's going to the diner for dessert?".
I said what the heck and went. That was the proverbial straw and now the camel has had surgery and is doing just fine....lol.

[Marlana]

I agree with Jessica. I would want a partner to go out with the first couple times. And truthfully, girls don't go out alone. So when I'm ready, I gotta find a friend.