Need advice

[someperson001]

Hi.

I rarely get the privacy to crossdress. My parents leave the house very rarely, and if they do, it's usually for a maximum of 4 hours.
Next to that, I don't have anywhere in my room where I can store and hide bought makeup/clothes. Most of my room's storage is clearly visible and the nooks and crannies usually get ransacked through by our cleaning lady every week. Where should I hide my stuff?

So until now, I just used the four hours I would sometimes get and used my mother's makeup and clothes. But it doesn't look convincing at all, not to mention that I feel guilty for using my mom's stuff.

I'd like to crossdress in a way where, as a result, I would look completely like a girl and not just like a guy in drag. I need to buy makeup and clothes for this, but how do I do this without the shop clerks suspecting anything? I'd rather not have anyone find out.

What do I do?

[Erina]

I keep em in a bag under the bed. I told my folks that it is full of books:). sometimes I place some papers on top but they don't open it and they don't care.
I can't tell you what to do. Can only tell you how I do. As long they don't suspect that you are hiding something bad then they shouldn't get to nosy, perhaps you could even tell them that you don't like people going thru your things.

Something I know for sure is that, you are never alone when you live at home. Its sad but quite true

[Michelle V]

Be super patient, there will be a time I your life where you'll find the right time and place to be yourself, just give it time, I was raised with two sisters and a single Mom, I used the time when they were absent to use their clothes, and had lots of fun doing it, till I miscalculated the time once and got caught. My sister found me and made me feel like a miserable perverted freak, I wish I had been honest with my family especially my Mom at the time since then and not hide who I am, I received psychiatric consul and was not very honest with them either, which resulted in misery most of my life. Two failed marriages later I. Have found a woman who loves me and accepts me for myself, had I been honest from the beginning...who knows. My family might have accepted me and supported me or I would have move on and lived my life the way it made me happy.
I suggests you don't take chances until you are ready to face the consequences. I wish you the best and be strong, only time will tell what the future holds

[jillleanne]

Sounds like you need a place to dress and store stuff. You can rent a storage locker if you can afford it. Best you try to find friends that will accept you and allow you to store your stuff at their place. You could always just spill the beans with the parents and take your chances. Tough one. Good luck.

[Stephanie47]

When I was growing up I shared an apartment with my parents, an older brother and a much younger sister. I did use my mom's makeup-hideous! I wore my mom's clothing when I could. I did have my own $$$ when I started working after school. I will say this, "There ain't no place you can hide anything from a mother." Since you say you live in a house, if you're lucky there may be a dropped ceiling in the basement or recreation room. If there is a dropped ceiling just don't put too much weight on any one panel, and, stay away from the panels near any lights.

[Ava Tryptyk]

Are you sure that you have no bins or boxes where you can store things? No boxes with old toys or schoolbooks, things like that that parents or cleaning ladies wouldn't regularly go through? You could rent a storage locker indeed, but if it's going to be a long-term thing, that could get expensive. I think you'd be better off leaving your stuff with friends whom you accept and trust. OR...I don't know if this would work or not...but you could say, "Hey Mom and Dad, one of my best friends is interested in dressing up as a girl and doesn't want his parents to know about it, so he wants me to hang onto his stuff when he's not using it." Then you could judge by their reaction what they think of crossdressing...and if they are really cool about it, you could even come out to them.

About your other question regarding shop clerks - I don't know how old you are or whether you have a car, but if you're in a small town and you're worried that shop clerks will start gossiping and telling other people, you could try driving/taking a bus to an area further away from where you live. But shop clerks generally don't care about what stuff you're buying - they just want to make money.

[reb.femme]

Personally, a lockable case would be best and what's in it is your secret and no other bugg3rs business. Other than that, how much is rented accommodation for one around your way?

Sounds like a cue for beginning life out on your own. I left home at 17 to live with my girlfriend and child, been married ever since. Bit of an extreme method for you perhaps but you get my drift etc etc. :heehee:

Rebecca

[Thera Home]

What do I do?

Hello Kiddo
First what you need to do is concentrate on finishing you education and then get a job and find your own place. Don't try and pull a fast one on your parents. They will find out and then you'll be in position you dont want to be in. Don't dishonor your parents by worring and looking for yourself at this point in your life. Youre still young and have a whole lot of living in front of you.


Thera

[melissaK]

Sweetie, your first post and nothing in your profile. Not really enough to give a helpful opinion. I could guess about age, sexual preference, how far back does this interest go, your religion, your relationship with parents, your financial situation, etc etc, but I'd rather not.

But trying to live a double life from parents or friends or significant others is generally unhealthy for your self esteem, your long term happines and your relationships with those others.

A lot of transgendered people start by denying their cross gender interests and end up in a traditional relationship with kids and feel quite trapped by their false promises to others. You see if you have internal shame or guilt over CDing or trans issues, you may not love yourself as you are, and you may feel unloveable. You may have abandonment or rejection issues because part of you doesnt feel loved or accepted. This makes us prone to clinging tightly to the first significant other who takes an interest in us. As someone above posted, it can lead to unhappy relationships. But I have no idea what might apply to you.

So, any chance you have a counselor you can chat with to work through this?

And dont let gender cross dressing issues distract you completely. Keep your school grades up no matter what - doesn't matter where you are in gender land if you can't find a decent job.

Hugs,
'lissa

[Ally 2112]

When i was younger (way long ago ) I built a sterio stand or cabinet as you might call it .I covered in the bottom put a door at the back of it with an inner lock .As far as i knew no one suspected anything .Or you could build a video game stand ? :)

[Karren H]

I actually rebuilt the bathroom cabinets .... kind of an engineer thing i guess..... all that area behind the kick plate is like free space.... remove the kick plate and reattach it with magnetic locks.... and you can make other hidden compartments in the cabinets too...... just have to be creative that's all...

[Beverley Sims]

Don't do what I did when I was eleven.
I used to hide my stash in a cardboard box under the bed.
Worked well for a couple of years, then a brilliant idea......
Put a padlock on one of my cupboards, and it will all be super safe......
I was busted in less than twelve hours. So was the lock. :)

[Kaz]

Hi, someperson... why not do a post in the Introductions section and tell us a bit about yourself and context... we will be able to give you a lot more advice if we know more... don't worry... you are as anonymous as you want to be here!

[Brenda79135]

Hi.

I rarely get the privacy to crossdress. My parents leave the house very rarely, and if they do, it's usually for a maximum of 4 hours.
Next to that, I don't have anywhere in my room where I can store and hide bought makeup/clothes. Most of my room's storage is clearly visible and the nooks and crannies usually get ransacked through by our cleaning lady every week. Where should I hide my stuff?

So until now, I just used the four hours I would sometimes get and used my mother's makeup and clothes. But it doesn't look convincing at all, not to mention that I feel guilty for using my mom's stuff.

I'd like to crossdress in a way where, as a result, I would look completely like a girl and not just like a guy in drag. I need to buy makeup and clothes for this, but how do I do this without the shop clerks suspecting anything? I'd rather not have anyone find out.

What do I do?

First off, look at the furniture in your room. Almost all funiture has some wasted space that can be used. The chest of drawers is the most likely to have the most. Does the chest go all the way to the floor? If so, pull the bottom drawer out and see how much room there is between the bottom drawer and the floor. This is often a great hiding place since it means work to get at it. As for the house cleaner going through every nook a crannie, stop depending on this person to clean your room. Clean it yourself. Don't give this person a reason to go through anything. Keep your room clean so only a vacuuming is done and nothing else. As for buying things, now is the time of year that things can be bought without much trouble. Halloween is upon us. If you have a GF, start getting your 'outfit' ready buy shopping the thrift stores and get your war-paint now for your outfit.

[Ashley D.]

Hi sweetie,
I aswell as moste everyone here knows this is a tuff time in your life.
I'm sour this site can be a great resource for you I wish I had the net when I was starting out.
Anywho first thing is it would help if you could tell us more about you self. How old you are, a little about you home life, and if you have anyone to confide in.

Second hidding things is tricky. I thought I was good at hidding things. But in time someone always found it. Over time I stopped trying and come out to my family. Which was no big shock. The lies I tald weren't very good.

[jillleanne]

I actually rebuilt the bathroom cabinets .... kind of an engineer thing i guess..... all that area behind the kick plate is like free space.... remove the kick plate and reattach it with magnetic locks.... and you can make other hidden compartments in the cabinets too...... just have to be creative that's all...

and if you're really handy with tools, you can continue down between the walls, into the basement wall cavities, install a dumb waiter in each cavity. When you are finished, hollow out the legs of the coffee and end tables in the living room. They make great hiding places for makeup and stuff. If you have too much makeup like I do, hollow out the dining room table legs. No one ever uses that room anyway.

[someperson001]

Sweetie, your first post and nothing in your profile. Not really enough to give a helpful opinion. I could guess about age, sexual preference, how far back does this interest go, your religion, your relationship with parents, your financial situation, etc etc, but I'd rather not.

But trying to live a double life from parents or friends or significant others is generally unhealthy for your self esteem, your long term happines and your relationships with those others.

A lot of transgendered people start by denying their cross gender interests and end up in a traditional relationship with kids and feel quite trapped by their false promises to others. You see if you have internal shame or guilt over CDing or trans issues, you may not love yourself as you are, and you may feel unloveable. You may have abandonment or rejection issues because part of you doesnt feel loved or accepted. This makes us prone to clinging tightly to the first significant other who takes an interest in us. As someone above posted, it can lead to unhappy relationships. But I have no idea what might apply to you.

Well, here is my story..

A long while back, I started wondering what it would be like to be a girl. That curiosity quickly turned into an obsession, and eventually a fetish.. And yes, I am ashamed of it.
I have a good life, and don't want to risk changing my gender because that could ruin my life as it is right now. Crossdressing is the closest I can get without changing my gender.
I also don't like hospitals, so surgery would be a very big step for me - next to dramatically changing my life.
Next to that, at my age, it's probably too late to change. I would still have secondary puberty characteristics..

As for my age, i'm between 18 and 24. I don't want to tell my exact age.
Sexual preference is hetero, and if I was a girl I would probably be lesbian. I don't have a girlfriend, and I am not married.

I have denied being transgender, even to myself, and I am still not sure if I really am - because it started with this simple spark of curiosity. I used to shrug it off.
There were some signs when I was a kid. When I was a kid, I was of the opinion that toys shouldn't be divided into genders, and next to boy's TV shows I also watched girl's TV shows. Like Winx Club, PowerPuff Girls, and Totally Spies. I focused on the plot and running gags, and didn't care about the gender division. That's changed now though, for some reason..

[ReineD]

I actually rebuilt the bathroom cabinets .... kind of an engineer thing i guess..... all that area behind the kick plate is like free space.... remove the kick plate and reattach it with magnetic locks.... and you can make other hidden compartments in the cabinets too...... just have to be creative that's all...

Ooh, I want to do that in my kitchen. You can get IKEA drawers with glides that attach to the sides of the cabinetry and attach the kickplate to the drawer front. Great place to store valuables, ID papers, laptops, etc when you're out. :)

To someperson001 (love your name), given your second post, I'd talk to your parents about it. I know the prospect is awful, but I'm a mom and if one of my sons had told me this, I would have taken him seriously. You could tell them exactly what you said in post #17, and tell them that you want to see a gender counselor. In time, your parents could also talk to the gender counselor and it may well be decided that it is to your mental benefit to present as a girl at home occasionally. For now.

And no, it's not too late to transition even when you're done with college. You should see some of the ladies here who've done this in their 30s and 40s. But, you will need to finance yourself so I hope that you'll be able to focus on your education while you also figure out your gender.

I wish you all the best! :hugs:

[Erina]

A long while back, I started wondering what it would be like to be a girl. That curiosity quickly turned into an obsession, and eventually a fetish.. And yes, I am ashamed of it.

Started as an idea and evolved a bit more into some kind of arousal for me to. Haven't felt that arousal in a while, still ashamed of what it might mean. Think this might be common on this forum, you're definitely not alone.
I'm on the first steps of crossdressing also. I'm inexperienced, think that's the first challenge. Getting understanding
You can buy of Ebay and get it home delivered if you can get it from the mailbox before your parents. If your parents would beat you to it, they might not open your mail?

[Stephenie S]

Well, you can't hide anything from a mother. If you hide it, she will find it. That's just a fact of life. She may not say anything to you. She may be just as embarrassed abut it as you are, but she WILL find it.

The best thing, by FAR, is to tell your parents. No question.

Asking to see a therapist shows you are serious about this. That's a good idea.

A lifetime full of guilt and shame is a lifetime wasted, and you will get only one. Best to be as true to yourself as you can.

Stephenie

[EllieOPKS]

Do you have a garage? You can get pretty creative with storage places in the garage. If you have your own car, that's a pretty handy place as well.

[Elena Ornamental]

Years ago when my brother helped me move and I didn't want to put my dressing in his face, I packed the clothes into the back of a speaker cabinet. I don't know if that helps but nobody mentioned it this far.

[Missy]

online buying, or just hold off till you get your own place.
I had too wait till I got my own place but it was worth it for me.