Avoiding Girly Things

[Megan_Renee]

When I was younger (about my son's age) I did not get to make Christmas cookies. My mother had a ridiculous idea that I would become much less messy if I wore an apron. She was right, of course, but it was a frilly apron. I was afraid that if I wore it someone would figure out I liked it, so I refused to wear it. This put me in a heap of trouble, and meant I didn't get to help making cookies that year.

Once I remembered this, I started thinking about things. I have an odd tendency to avoid girly things when in "guy" mode so that people won't figure out what (who?) I am.

I mocked my SO for watching Next Top Model, and did not think about it at the time, but I really *do* want to watch it. Why WOULDN'T I? I continue doing this, even though I am being more honest with myself. Very strange... Oh well, I bit the bullet the other night and watched an episode with my SO. She laughed at me and said that it was about time.

tl;dr - meandering post. Feel free to reply!

[STACY B]

Super Man complex ,,, Your young ,,,You will give up soon,,, An tell ya what ,,,Don;t get in front of my TV when What Not to Wear is on,,, There will be TROUBLE !! Or shoe shopping with Jane !!

[Phoebe]

My mother made dresses and aprons for neighbors to earn a little extra cash during WWII. Clothes were in short supply due to rationing. I modeled her dresses and aprons for neighbors who had girls around my age and height/weight.

I teased my ex-wife about watching soap operas on Television, but then she knew I was teasing her. But other than that didn't mind being around 'girly things'. :battingeyelashes:

Also learned to cook from my mother as a teenager, wore her aprons. Good lessons in cooking. I live by myself and prepare my own meals and not frozen junk from the frozen food coolers! Also worked as a short order cook in a small cafe freshman and sophomore years in high school, the aprons were plain white and folded down the 'bib' part most of the time.

[kristinacd55]

That is too funny, because I used to do the same thing......someone might figure out im a crossdresser!! oh no!! :eek:

[dsmth]

I know. It is a sad thing actually. How we waste so much of our lives "acting" a part that we don't want to play as the script tells us we are supposed to. When we finally realize that only we ourselves control our own experience will we hope to maybe have some (perhaps only small) form of happiness.

[Stephanie47]

It's not too late to put that apron on. I bought several bib aprons on eBay and they are wonderful. The costs were a lot less than even buying on of those 'manly' BBQing male motif aprons. You do not have to get a frilly French maid apron unless that's what you would like. I find the bib aprons keep my dresses from getting stained or dirty while baking, cooking and washing dishes. It's a lot easier throwing the apron in the washer than laundering a dress that needs to be lined dried.

And, please, please teach your son to cook the basics. Even when I was a single digit kid I cooked my own eggs in the morning. And, I did make cookies with my mother, although sans apron.

As to watching television. I watch the Today Show most every day with an eye on the lovely dresses the hosts and guests wear. I love the Ambush Makeover segments.

[Persephone]

It takes a long while to break out of the prison that we build for ourselves.

Hugs,
Persephone.

[STACY B]

It takes a long while to break out of the prison that we build for ourselves.

Hugs,
Persephone.



Tell ya what Sissta,,,, Its a wonderful thing when ya do !!! An they hate it ,,, When your at ease ,,, Let the Good Times Roll !!

[kimdl93]

I think Peter denied Christ three times. So don't feel so bad about putting up a front to protect yourself. I over compensated for years - trying to avoid or undo any impression that may have revealed who I really was.

[Megan_Renee]

I know. It is a sad thing actually. How we waste so much of our lives "acting" a part that we don't want to play as the script tells us we are supposed to. When we finally realize that only we ourselves control our own experience will we hope to maybe have some (perhaps only small) form of happiness.

You know what's funny? I didn't even realize I was ACTING until just recently!

[Megan_Renee]

It's not too late to put that apron on. I bought several bib aprons on eBay and they are wonderful. The costs were a lot less than even buying on of those 'manly' BBQing male motif aprons. You do not have to get a frilly French maid apron unless that's what you would like. I find the bib aprons keep my dresses from getting stained or dirty while baking, cooking and washing dishes. It's a lot easier throwing the apron in the washer than laundering a dress that needs to be lined dried.

And, please, please teach your son to cook the basics. Even when I was a single digit kid I cooked my own eggs in the morning. And, I did make cookies with my mother, although sans apron.

As to watching television. I watch the Today Show most every day with an eye on the lovely dresses the hosts and guests wear. I love the Ambush Makeover segments.

My son (and daughter) are both often involved in cooking and baking around the house. When they're a little older I'm going to teach them to sew as well. There is nothing like being able to make/alter clothes when needed!

[Abbygirl]

I was afraid that if I wore it someone would figure out I liked it, so I refused to wear it. This put me in a heap of trouble, and meant I didn't get to help making cookies that year.

Once I remembered this, I started thinking about things. I have an odd tendency to avoid girly things when in "guy" mode so that people won't figure out what (who?) I am.



I don't think it's that odd, assuming you don't want to be found out, like me. I feel like I am an illusion whether I'm in guy mode or girl mode. In girl mode I hide my guy-ness. In guy mode I hide my girl-ness (well, most of it).
Here lately though, I've found that letting a little Abby slip into my guy mode is quite enjoyable. Sometimes I think I unconsciously WANT to be found out so I can just be myself.

[StaceyXOXOX]

I so understand. I also have recently noticed this about myself as I continue to embrace my fem side. Dont get me wrong I still love sports, fishing, hunting, drinking beer like a guy but I also find myself not denying to watch romantic movies and drinking fruity drinks. I have poked fun at my wife for many years for the shows she watches but I have to be careful not to jump into things as I don't want her to find out before I'm ready to tell her. but damn I really starting to like those strawberry daquaris.

[Sheila11]

When I was a young teen my mom used to offer me nylons to wear when it was cold out and I had no long johns. I wouldn't do it for fear my brother and his friends would tease me. At the same time I was sneaking nylons and panties when she wasn't home. Silly me. If I would have accepted her offer back then I could say she started the whole thing. :D

[Gillian Gigs]

This reminded me of something that happened to me as a kid. We were out at the lake for the day, and I had no change of clothes. The people we were visiting had three girls and they were going swimming. One of there extra one piece swim suits was offered to me, so I could go swimming also. I refused to wear it and so I did not go into the water, but I did long within myself to wear the swim suit.

[Megan_Renee]

I so understand. I also have recently noticed this about myself as I continue to embrace my fem side. Dont get me wrong I still love sports, fishing, hunting, drinking beer like a guy but I also find myself not denying to watch romantic movies and drinking fruity drinks.

I drink like my sister-in-law... Ok, that's a lie, I could never put away beer like she does... She is a BOSS with the beers.


When I was a young teen my mom used to offer me nylons to wear when it was cold out and I had no long johns. I wouldn't do it for fear my brother and his friends would tease me. At the same time I was sneaking nylons and panties when she wasn't home. Silly me. If I would have accepted her offer back then I could say she started the whole thing. :D

I know, right? I did the SAME THING! I remember putting on that apron one day and just dancing around the house for hours... THE SAME APRON!


This reminded me of something that happened to me as a kid. We were out at the lake for the day, and I had no change of clothes. The people we were visiting had three girls and they were going swimming. One of there extra one piece swim suits was offered to me, so I could go swimming also. I refused to wear it and so I did not go into the water, but I did long within myself to wear the swim suit.

Oh my goodness! I can't say what I would have done. That has ALWAYS (seriously) been something I've wanted to do... I don't know if I could have resisted, especially if there was any prompting...

[Cynthia Anne]

When I was young there were NO boys aloud in the kitchen! No one knew it but I would of loved to put on ''that'' apron! I feel cheated!!!!!!!!!!!

[UNDERDRESSER]

This thread is was not what i thought it was. I used to avoid such girly things too. These days, having come to understand, at least partially, what drives me, I'm much more, effeminate, or touchy feely, however you want describe it. I compliment GGs all the time on clothing choices, I've said several times that I'm jealous of colors that girls get to pick from, several people at work know that I've tried on, even purchased, the womens version of technical clothing because of specific features, fit, or availability.

I'm reminded of a time when i was....13? The family went to the beach, and somehow my swimsuiit was left at home. My mother went shopping, and returned with a pair "swimming trunks" I was suspicious, because the tag had been removed, but they didn't look very different from my usual "speedo" type trunks. Looking back, they were in fact, small womens panties in a horizontal blue white stripe. It was obvious they weren't swimwear when i came out of the water, the white stripes were pretty much see through! :o

[Angela Campbell]

I had a girlfriend years ago who knew I liked to wear lingere when we were in the bedroom. She fully accepted and even went shopping with me to pick out outfits for both of us. I never had been fully dressed at the time but wanted to. One day she offered to do makeup on me and I declined because although wearing panties and hose and garters for sex was ok I didn't want her to know I was full blown. I really wish I had done that.

[KatieTaylor]

As a general rule I tried to avoid girly things when i was growing up and all through my teenage years. With i think 2 exceptions, one when i was about 12 i said i wanted some roller skates, my mother said i had to try my girl cousin's ones first to see how i got on they were bright pink with black stars on them, i remember them well, I spent ages wearing them but couldn't get the hang of them, so never got my own pair. The second was at about 14, my mother was throwing some of her jeans, she said "try them on see if they fit" so i did and they did fit. They were mostly in a male style but had the button on the left! I wore them until i'd worn them out.
Katie Taylor x

[michellecd9999]

This is similar to a thread I posted recently. It seems that many of us missed some opportunities to dress, being afraid that others might see that we enjoyed the opportunity to dress up or do toooo good of a job with the makeup and dress. See my thread....
http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?180558-Missed-Opportunities&highlight=missed+opportunities

[Saffron]

Count me In. I avoided all girly things while being with others, fearing it will expose me. Ironically, there was a pair of times when my family almost catch me wearing girl clothes. In fact, once my mom caught me wearing a wig she had, but she was more concerned about if the wig was damaged. She must think at the time that it was only a child playing.

[GeminaRenee]

Well, sometimes vigorous denial can be the most authentic form of confirmation! (;

Been there, done that - and I hate to say it, still find myself doing it from time to time.

[Paige Winslow]

While walking with a male friend in NYC, I bought a red wallet. He freaked! Red Wallet!!! So gay!!! Some people need to relax.

[Miriam-J]

I carry harsh memories of a Christmas pageant when I was around 7 or 8. We "elves" were required to wear green tights, and I was incredibly embarassed at having to wear them. I had one line that took me to the front of the stage, and I can still taste the pure mortification. I was much less secure socially in those days, and I'm sure that contributed to the image sensitivity more than anything.

I still maintain concern about image for various situations, but I think it's a more sensible and more flexible viewpoint. But I'm not even close to being ready to wear a dress to work yet.

Miriam

[Jeannie]

When I am in drab mode and the wife and I are out shopping I try not to go into the women's section so I go the opposite and within five minutes I find myself in the women's section with her and we start looking things for both of us. Like today I went to a store return some shirts but they wouldn't take then back because they had a 3 day return policy on these particular shirts which were on sale (I waited to long) so we wound up in the women's shoe section and oh they had some very pretty shoe on sale. The funny thing is that we had brought two other women with us but they were in the other part of the store so I was hoping they would stay there and they did. I constantly do things like that. The clothing section for men is just to darn boring.

[Beverley Sims]

I put on the macho image many times at the wrong time.
I missed out on being dressed by those that thought I would look convincing as a girl.
When I was twenty that all changed. I went along with the suggestions and never looked back. :)

[Sharon B.]

When out with friends I try my best not to look at feminine things. Growing up I was taught to cook and sew buttons on, my parents reasoning was you never know when it might come in handy, still cook but don't do buttons. When out alone I will look at all things feminine and will shop in the feminine section. Even now as I sit here have panties, bra and eye liner on along with a pair of womans shorts with nail polish on my toenails.

[nancigirl]

I can certainly relate to the ideas in this thread! Two of my more memorable 'avoidance/denial' experiences were: (1) Being in a Christmas play (as Santa) and refusing to wear lipstick as part of the makeup job; (2) Being only one of two boys in my 4th grade class that did NOT dress as girls on "switch day". I got in major trouble for that one.
I just knew that if i went to school in a dress, or told my mom about switch day, that everyone would be able to know instantly that i secretly wanted to be a girl. (my mom found out about switch day a few days later, and i was in big trouble for not going along with the rules.)