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Lorileah
09-29-2012, 10:47 PM
*This thread is not intended to provoke spirituality discussions*

My path keeps evolving and leading me to places I would have never thought I would be a year ago. Today, I went to church.

A few months ago I met a new friend at the local piano bar. -Black-Crown- (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?180700-Live-from-the-Black-Crown-in-Denver-Colorado...&highlight=). I was still going and sitting alone and he would join me at my table ( it was a two person table, the place was busy, no need to take a whole table by myself). He would sing with the pianist and was the one who "made me" get up and sing there. One night another person at the bar said "You know Father Micheal?". I thought they were kidding. Maybe he was a pastor or minister but "Father"? Turns out he was working to be ordained as an Ecumenical priest. I wrangled an invitation. In truth I really wanted to support him in this endeavor.

I planned to be off work all day today so I could go. It meant getting up earlier than normal but I would sacrifice for him. I had never put makeup on in the morning before. This would be a first. Day makeup verses night makeup...and to be more specific CHURCH makeup. He had made it a point to tell me I could come in any form I chose. I asked what to wear and he said "Basic black is always good". Lucky for me half my closet is black.

I went through the usually ritual of getting ready, but I noticed that I changed a few procedures around. Was it the early morning or was it because I was nut fully awake? Amazingly I didn't forget to do anything. And I was ready early! Black dress with pantyhose...I don't usually wear hose but it was Church!...you are supposed to wear hose right?.. and black pumps...4 inch...um...in church? Oh well that is what I had. I was early...half an hour early. But I decided to go and get there early so I could park.

My car battery was dead. There I was, nine AM, dressed to the nines....and my car won't start. In guy mode, no problem, jump it. As I was...nu uh...wasn't going to happen. I tried the battery charger but could not read it well in the garage (again guy mode no problem, push it out and jump it). It was not working. Luckily I have another car. Well a small SUV not as classy as the sedan. I will just take it! I transferred what I was taking to the SUV. Go in the house to get the key and...can't find it. For the last 2 and 1/2 weeks I have not been home much (no I am not giving all the details...this is a G rated site) and the kitchen was a disaster. After10 minutes I found the key, right where I had looked twice before. OK deep breath, I am still early.

The drive was uneventful. Noticed I had lost my thumb nails. Oh well I will keep them hidden. I found the church with no problem. I even found a parking place and I got in it the first time! (I have a terrible time parallel parking). But I looked around. This was a high class neighborhood. Not that I am low class but I was a 1/2 block away, almost 10 in the morning, in a dress and heels...well maybe they would think I was just getting home. Deep breath, grab my purse, get out, walk across someones lawn in my heels (it was a service aerating) and to the sidewalk. Where I came face to face with a man who smiled and said "hi". I smiled back (you are supposed to right?). Walking briskly toward the church and...met a woman walking her dog. "Hi" "hi".

Got to the door of the church, went it and had no clue where I was supposed to be. I could hear singing in the "Chapel" and talking on the stairs. Choose...stairs (well what would YOU do?). Met a man in robes and a woman in a clerical collar.

"Down the hall to your right." Aw, they know the CD is looking for..wait...what am I looking for. I stopped "Down the hall to your right then left up the stairs" the robed man told me. They were going to the same place.

I have not been in a church for years. I was waiting for rumbling and the earth moving because, I am a guy in a dress with 4 inch heels on Saturday morning. Didn't happen. I entered the main church and was greeted by everyone there. I was the only noticeable TG, but they acted like I was a member, (PM me if you want to know more about this church). The service was excellent and inspiring. I am not Catholic so I had no idea what to do and when to do it. But I followed along. I cried twice when the Bishop gave the liturgy. It hit me about the loss of my wife 4 years ago and my GF last year. Silly me, I didn't plan on crying so I had no tissue or touch up makeup. I cried again as Father Micheal stood before us now an ordained clergy member.

The reception was at the Crown (yeah cool huh?). I stopped at StudioLites to say "hi" and because it was next to the gas station ( I had not planned using the SUV so it was about 1/4 tank and I wasn't going to risk running out). Got two nails for my thumbs. (sweet they had some that matched). Went to the reception. Yes I sang. I will be doing a WWII show in 5 weeks and I will be singing "Dream" Luckily I knew the words and the pianist was "Awesome" (his words). I also stole Father Micheal's song "Stormy Weather". Mea culpa Father :) Met the young lady whose dog I worked with ( I think I posted that somewhere here) and we talked for an hour. Decided to go home and at least clean up to go out again...well here I am so you know that I stayed home.

Jumped the car..Now has a "check engine" light. I looked; the engine is still there but the light won't believe me.

Leah Lynn
09-29-2012, 11:01 PM
Sounds like a very interesting day. Don't suppose you got a pic of the church ensemble?

ColleenCD
09-29-2012, 11:41 PM
Hi LoriLeah,

Great read! You overcame a number of events that would have discouraged most. Church is very interesting when we can take away the pretenses of our perception of other peoples expectations of who we are. As Father Michael spoke, I'm sure you were able to relax and appreciate the love of God and those around you. If only the rest of the world could be this way, we wouldn't have to be so apprehensive about our presented gender. I'm so glad you had a successful experience and hope you consider returning. BTW, sorry for your losses.

Thank you for sharing LoriLeah,

Colleen

Cynthia Anne
09-29-2012, 11:51 PM
Lorileah I believe you had a pretty interesting day indeed! For that ''light'' that won't believe you; take a hammer to it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Beverley Sims
09-30-2012, 08:36 AM
A very touching and moving event in your life.
Wonderful for the priest who took his vows as well.

ArleneRaquel
09-30-2012, 11:39 PM
Lorileah,
Lovely post, I'm glad that you told us about your spiritual experience. :)

Lorileah
10-01-2012, 12:00 AM
:thinking:I never did find my nails...

Persephone
10-01-2012, 01:51 AM
Sounds like a wonderful day, Lorileah, despite the various items that popped up along the way to slow you dowm and frazzle your nerves. And it was really inspiring to read about the moments that so inspired you!

I get another feeling when I attend services, and although you didn't mention it directly, perhaps it affected you the way it affects me, and that is to participate in the services and to pray in a dress, hose, and heels becomes an acknowledgement that you are there in the manner that God had intended, that in a sense you are accepting God's design for you, a sort of deeply private and deeply personal moment in which you comune with God and say, "I hear you."

Hugs,
Persephone.

GaleWarning
10-01-2012, 03:40 AM
Reminds me of the amazingly accepting response I got from the clergy and congregation when I first started going to church back in 1992.
Interesting post, Lori. Thanks for sharing.

Lorileah
10-01-2012, 11:06 AM
Sounds like a very interesting day. Don't suppose you got a pic of the church ensemble?

there were photos but by others. maybe I can get one :)