Getting braver and braver when out!!!

[GinaM]

Well, I went out again today and had an even better experience. I'm getting so brave which is awesome. I went to 2 separate malls and walked around both of them. Went to several McDonalds for pit stops and no issues just walked right in. I even went for a stroll in a busy outdoor shopping area. All in all an awesome day and no issues at all. Looks like all the issues are in our heads. Obviously we still need to play it safe but it was fun for sure.

[STACY B]

Get out there in the MIX ,,, That's how to Roll sissta ,,, No shame in your Game ,,,,Fun ain't it ?

[bridget thronton]

Well done - most people really do not make a big deal out of seeing us out

[Launa]

Way to go. I'm trying to do the same thing during the daytime!!!
I still feel fear like I'm a vampire and can only come out at night.

[Megan Briana]

YES! congratulations for your bravery. My own has only gotten me onto my lanai, either in my pj's or cami + bra and jeans. As soon as i feel comfortable with my abilities in the makeup dept., I will add that to my list.

[Lucy Lou]

You go for it girl. I will do the same my self one day. Maybe it will be in Paris as I think they will just accept it and say "oh la la!" Lucy

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Gina, The more that you do it the easier it gets.

[Cynthia Anne]

Good for you Gina! Get-er-done and enjoy it!

[GinaM]

I'm totally enjoying this and I'm able to get out about 2-3 times per month. It's so liberating being out and is something I wanted to do since I was so much younger. Just glad I've found the courage to actually do it. Getting better with clothing too which helps tone things down a bit so I'm not so obvious which is definitely helping.

[AnitaH]

Way to go. Have fun. being out is something I dreamed about for decades, it was a little over a year ago that I finally made that dream come true. Haven't looked back since. Yes one has to be careful but most people don't bother. Keep up, have fun but be careful.

AnitaH

[Beverley Sims]

The more you go out the more confidence you gain.
Do not forget who you are and keep your appearance up to scratch.
It is easy to get outed inadvertently due to paying attention to detail.

[sonna]

get out there and strut your stuff... becarful gets addicting.

[Wildaboutheels]

Good for you Gina.

So... 2 malls, several McDonalds and one busy outdoor shopping area? Maybe passed 200 people? 400? A thousand or more? [if they were "busy" malls] And not one single hassle from anyone.

Golly, that shure sounds like A C C E P T A N C E to me.

BUT... you don't really know what they were THINKING.

I am guessing that at this point, you realize it doesn't matter what THEY think.

Q for you. Can you point to anything that finally convinced you to "Just Do It"? Maybe you were struck by a lightning bolt?

[Stephenie S]

Wildabout mentions a very important point.

You can't know what they were thinking. But wait. You can't ever know what ANYONE is thinking. All you can know is how they react to you. That's all. None of us can ever know what anyone else really thinks. This is true always! No matter WHAT you wear. Drab or femme, it don't matter. You will NEVER know what others really think about you.

So why worry about it? If the pitchforks and the torches stay hidden, what else can you expect of others? No one screamed, no one pointed. So relax already.

Stephie

[GinaM]

Q for you. Can you point to anything that finally convinced you to "Just Do It"? Maybe you were struck by a lightning bolt?

I've ALWAYS wanted to go out and as I've been dressing more and more that desire has grown stronger. Earlier this year I was away at a hotel and my goal was to step out into the hall. It took me hours to do so but finally I said I will go to the soda machine at the end of the hall and buy a soda and rush back to my room. I would get out into the hall and then rush back in. Finally I did it and it was F-ING AWESOME!!!! I had to go out again so I went back into the hall and walked up stairs and back around and back to my room. AGAIN, F-ing AWESOME. I walked down the stairs and opened the outside door and stepped outside. EVEN MORE AWESOME!!!! I walked to my car and got in and actually drove around. I got out of the car a few times and it was one of the greatest experiences. After that I would go out for short rides etc. and get out of the car even for just a few seconds. I did this a bunch of times just making sure to get fairly far from home. I was first dressing in ****ty clothing so I was def. standing out. Now, I try to tone it down a bit (but ALWAYS wear 5" or higher heels) and try to go to safe places. The mall was scary but exciting. People did look but most didn't even notice me. A few def. had my figured out but nobody said anything to me. A sales associate at JC Penny even stopped to say hi and asked if I needed any help. I only wish I took her up on the offer and tried on some clothing and dresses while there. I saw a sexy dress I wanted to buy so badly but didn't. Now, I just try getting out more and more often. My goal is a few hours each week. Baby steps will get you there.

I'm telling you that you ABSOLUTELY NEED to get out. It's AMAZING!!!! Hearing your high heels click on the ground just gets your heart racing.

[ArleneRaquel]

Gina,
Great news girl, I hope that you have many more positive outings.

[skirtsuit]

Maybe you were struck by a lightning bolt?

I saw Lightning Bolt last month. Best live band ever.

I think you're doing the right thing going out in the day. Personally, I feel much, much safer out in the day with lots of people around and less chance of running into a bunch for drunk hombres. The daylight is less revealing than you might think & is the best light, hands down, for photography.

I can also say that if you try and look your best people will respond positively - so get out there and shake it!

Best,
SkirtSuit

[pippinfort]

I spent the whole day in hose today but I hadnt the bottle to remain uncovered when out of the sanctuary of the car.

[Karren H]

"still have to pay it safe ".... there's a fine line between being brave and being stupid.... I know because I've crossed the line a number of times....so choose your venues carefully....

[pippinfort]

Yes you are right but the urge to "get out there" is soo strong.....

[Diversity]

Good going, Gina! You are having fun and gaining the courage I am also gaining as I take a few steps at a time. Your JC Penney post (above) was also enjoyable to read. Thanks for sharing.
Di

[RitaJanelle1964]

Went to several McDonalds for pit stops and no issues just walked right in.

Those pit stops are about the only issue I ever have anymore when going out dressed. I try to avoid using the ladies rooms unless it's direly necessary--it's too risky if you get read by a GG who might report you to security--and it helps to know where the Unisex bathrooms are located in whatever area you might be out and about in. Thankfully, the office building where I see my therapist at has a Unisex bathroom right inside a main entrance, so if the need arises, I know I can stop there without incident. Also, any time I anticipate going out dressed, I always make sure to go easy on the liquids beforehand--nothing worse than having to pee and being nowhere near a convenient bathroom!

[GinaM]

Those pit stops are about the only issue I ever have anymore when going out dressed. I try to avoid using the ladies rooms unless it's direly necessary--it's too risky if you get read by a GG who might report you to security--and it helps to know where the Unisex bathrooms are located in whatever area you might be out and about in. Thankfully, the office building where I see my therapist at has a Unisex bathroom right inside a main entrance, so if the need arises, I know I can stop there without incident. Also, any time I anticipate going out dressed, I always make sure to go easy on the liquids beforehand--nothing worse than having to pee and being nowhere near a convenient bathroom!

The thing is that many states have laws that you can use the bathroom for the gender you are dressed for. I know Massachusetts has this law so security can't really do anything at all. Plus, I would rather be outed by a GG than some insecure dude in the mens room.

[Megan Briana]

YES! congratulations for your bravery. My own has only gotten me onto my lanai, either in my pj's or cami + bra and jeans. As soon as i feel comfortable with my abilities in the makeup dept., I will add that to my list.

Well tonight, I have expanded my appearance to include some makeup (as well as my hand can do) and to a stroll off my lanai dressed and in heals, down the sidewalk to my mailbox (condo assoc.). Granted, I have a lil liquid courage, but I am thinking at the moment, "who cares?". Some of my neighbors must have a clue. If not, then ok. All went well, and maybe later I will go up to the stores. um....nah, my appearance wont cut that, but It is coming along.

[mayacd7]

Way to go Gina, you are brave. It is so exciting to go out. When I go out people do not question how I look because I blend in if I am sitting but when I stand up at 6'1 and 4" heals, then I really stand out and get noticed.

[Michelle (Oz)]

Ah, the drug of being out and about bites and confidence grows with each opportunity. You've enjoyed a terrific experience.

Two points made previously are very important:


Don't assume that people are laughing at you. They are likely to be just having a good time. We are not the centre of the universe even if our radar is very sensitive. Maintain your confidence even if you are read.

Give thought to the sort of places you go to avoid difficulties.

I'll add another - we don't own the ladies' restrooms so take care not to confront others there.

Michelle

[Shelly Preston]

Wildabout mentions a very important point.

You can't know what they were thinking. But wait. You can't ever know what ANYONE is thinking. All you can know is how they react to you. That's all. None of us can ever know what anyone else really thinks. This is true always! No matter WHAT you wear. Drab or femme, it don't matter. You will NEVER know what others really think about you.

Stephie

Sometimes you do get to know what others think

Last week I had reason to have a conversation witha guy who was 25- 30 years old

His only comment to a female friend of mine was that I had a slightly husky voice

So its not always bad news when others see or speak with you :D

[susangirl]

Glade for ya girl, I wanted to get out of the car so bad for a long time and once I did I couldn't believe it took me so long. Making your way through this world dressed as a woman is such a high. The clothing is to kill for and feels so frecking awesome. It really doesn't matter if some think your a man in womans clothing. Over time you get better and better at looking and acting the part.

[Eryn]

You can't know what they were thinking. But wait. You can't ever know what ANYONE is thinking.

Yes, quite true.

Back in my youth (and long before I even knew what CDing was) I had long hair and even permed it a few times. I didn't run around worrying if people thought I was a female. I knew I was a man and never even considered the idea that I might be "read" as female. It just wasn't conceivable to me that I could be read as anything else.

I try to apply this to my own en femme outings. I'm not the most feminine woman around but I've found that the more I get out there and interact with others the more accepted I feel. I've never been able to 100% identify a "sister" in public, but the thing that raises suspicions is someone who furtively zips about avoiding contact with everyone. GGs don't do that and we shouldn't either. The mindset that I try to adopt is that I am what I am presenting and it isn't open to debate. My voice may not be a soprano and I may be a bit tall, but the fact is that there are plenty of GGs with the same characteristics and they aren't worried about being "read." It's that assured manner that carries the day for them and hopefully, me.