PDA

View Full Version : It's good to be home.



I Am Paula
10-10-2012, 05:33 PM
My brother, and my lifelong musical colaborator died suddenly two weeks ago. Aside from the usual feeling of loss, it also meant the end of my band of the last 35 years, and my sudden retirement. My mother had asked that I come to the funeral in boy mode, for the sake of some of her friends. OK, I managed to pull that off, but with all the formalities and legalities to cope with, I ended up staying in boy mode for 11 days. Even had to shop for guy clothes (that was scary).
Anyway, got home day before yesterday. Spent most of the morning getting rid of guy cooties, painting my nails, etc. Back to a semblance of order, though still lamenting having cut my nails (acrylics tommorow). Put on some sensible (read silky) underwear and boobies, did my hair and makeup. Slipped into some nice suede wedges. Much better.
This morning I went back to my coffee hangout, and the girls were all there, talking about thier kids, gossiping, and just being women. I grabbed a grande latte, pulled up a chair just in time to find out Doris thinks her husband may be cheating.
As back to normal as it's going to get for a while.
There's still a memorial concert for my brother on Sunday, where I'll perform in drab, for the first time in years.

Alice B
10-10-2012, 05:46 PM
Not a lot I can say except my condolances. Losing a close loved one is difficult. I lost my son last year, so understand. Having it result in chnaging your life style makes it all the more difficult. You handled it all very well and maybe you can form a new band and see where that takes you. Just being accepted as one of the girls has to be very special.

Thera Home
10-10-2012, 06:10 PM
Hi Celeste

Im sorry to hear about your brother, I hope that you'll over time remember the good times you had and realize he's in a much better place now. Youre in my thoughts.

Thera

girlyboy13
10-10-2012, 06:21 PM
My brother, and my lifelong musical colaborator died suddenly two weeks ago. Aside from the usual feeling of loss, it also meant the end of my band of the last 35 years, and my sudden retirement. My mother had asked that I come to the funeral in boy mode, for the sake of some of her friends. OK, I managed to pull that off, but with all the formalities and legalities to cope with, I ended up staying in boy mode for 11 days. Even had to shop for guy clothes (that was scary).
Anyway, got home day before yesterday. Spent most of the morning getting rid of guy cooties, painting my nails, etc. Back to a semblance of order, though still lamenting having cut my nails (acrylics tommorow). Put on some sensible (read silky) underwear and boobies, did my hair and makeup. Slipped into some nice suede wedges. Much better.
This morning I went back to my coffee hangout, and the girls were all there, talking about thier kids, gossiping, and just being women. I grabbed a grande latte, pulled up a chair just in time to find out Doris thinks her husband may be cheating.
As back to normal as it's going to get for a while.
There's still a memorial concert for my brother on Sunday, where I'll perform in drab, for the first time in years.

I'm so sorry:-( hang in there

Lady Catherine
10-10-2012, 09:21 PM
So sorry. Hugs and prayers, hon.

michelle2020cd
10-10-2012, 09:30 PM
so sorry for your lost

Cynthia Anne
10-10-2012, 09:56 PM
So sorry for your loss! Getting back to normal can be rough sometimes I know! Best wishes to you and yours!

ColleenCD
10-10-2012, 10:16 PM
Hi Celeste,

Very sorry to hear about your loss. Glad to hear you're able to return to some familiarity in the midst of life's turning pages.

Thoughts and prayers,

Colleen

Beverley Sims
10-11-2012, 07:47 AM
I can not say more than what has already been said, but I do hope the Sunday memorial concert is a real blast.

DonnaT
10-11-2012, 11:36 AM
Sorry to hear of your loss.

Might want to hold off on the acrylics until after Sunday's concert?

I Am Paula
10-11-2012, 05:16 PM
Just won't paint them. My drab screams femme anyway.
Thanks everyone for the condolences.

Karen Francis
10-12-2012, 05:45 AM
To be in the music business for that long is quite an accomplishment. And a bigger loss. Hang in there.

Penny Lane
10-12-2012, 06:10 AM
Hi

So sorry to hear of your loss. The old adage of time being a healer is sort of true. I lost my eldest faughter four years ago at age 22. The first year is the worst, lots of "firsts" to get through, birthdays, Christmas etc. Time doesn't heal the hurt but it does teach you how to survive. You'll have good and bad days, with lots and lots of tears but you will cope and you will always. always have your memories.

Take care Penny xx

BOBBI G.
10-12-2012, 09:09 AM
Hang in there, it will get less painful. I lost my daughter 11 years ago, there isn't a day when she is not in my thoughts in some way or another. You will cope and life will seem to get better. I miss her terribly, but I get to see her in the two grand children. I was lucky. They did not really allow me time to feel sorry for myself. Soon the only memories you will have is of the good times you shared, and that makes life pretty great.

Bobbi

Tina B.
10-12-2012, 09:10 AM
Obviously you and your brother where close, sorry you lost him, loosing a childhood, and life long friend, that's hard. Having to meet others expectations while doing it, must have made it even harder since he accepted you as you are. You have my deepest sympathy for your lose.
Tina B.

TeriAnn
10-12-2012, 11:08 AM
Sorry to hear of your loss. I understand how you feel only to well I lost my Mom in Jan 2011 and I still want to pick up the phone and call her. I dont think I have accepted my Moms passing but I have to keep going. Hang in there as things will get better as time goes on. It may not seem like it but it will get better.