found something i wrote

[Kaitlyn Michele]

So this morning i'm going through drawers to consolidate things and create some space..

For a couple years prior to and during transition i did a bit of writing ..mostly my usual stream of conciousness....lots of .....'s heh

anyway, here is what i wrote on the back of an envelope i found..no explanation just the words in a column..

I have no idea when i wrote it but clearly it was in the middle of the worst times,

Lazy
pervert
drug addict
liar/betrayer
fag
wimp
pleaser
can't *** with anyone
quitter
guilty as charged
ashamed
embarrassed

ALONE

+++++

no matter how bad you feel, there is a way out if you really want it.

[Laurie Ann]

Kaitlyn,

I think we have all had those same thoughts at times during our transition.

[ReneeT]

So, what would you write today?

[CharleneT]

:iagree:

Today is so different than then, right ?

;)

Those times have passed ?

:whew!:

[Kaitlyn Michele]

I ripped it up and threw it out..

those times have way passed...

what would i write today??...S**T, i'm almost up to 4,000 posts!!:heehee:

[kellycan27]

You just described my ex to a T. Cept you left out a-hole :heehee:

[KellyJameson]

All those words are opinions of yourself that were forced on you by others and all those words are consequences of how you were treated by others but none of those words are truly you.

We are born into a pain not of our choosing that others make worse and somewhere in all that we struggle to rise above it.

There is nothing about us that deserves hating because it is not our hate but others that have taught us to hate ourselves by how we have been treated.

When I stopped fearing being hated that is when I found the courage to begin changing just for me and it was the most loving act of my life.