Not sure I'm Commited

[HeartRacing]

OK, here goes so bear with me.... Tried on Mom's bras as a kid and got "the thrill" and then moved on. 15 years later and married with foot fetish that she supports and then went on to panties. She "allows" me to wear hers and actually bought me a matching thong for fun on nights out- but not fully supportive of idea. Found this site and got some tips and ideas. THEN she recently cleaned out the closet. I happened to be the one to take the clothes to Goodwill and felt compelled to grab a few items. Polka dot skirt, black skort, maternity black dress, a few tops, and a few pantyhose. Tried a few on and felt amazing, then, after this site, did it again with makeup and bought heels online (size 16 blk mary janes- I'm not small). Really had fun 3/4 times and now the delema...

is this fetish/taboo and I'll get over it - or - keep going and eventually try to incorporate it. She is OK with the foot thing and thinks its funny to wear her panties very ocassionally. But I think this will weird her out.

Will this pass or am I hooked??? History and/or opinoins/advice?

[connie23]

Hi!
I think you may be hooked and what is so wrong with that? It sounds like you liked the clothes from Goodwill. That has whet your appetite. Is your wife understanding, is there anything in it for her? Can you reassure her you will not lose your love for her ? If so, then you may have lots of fun in your future!
Good luck and take it slow,
Connie

[GeminaRenee]

Welcome to the site!

There are some scarce legends of this passing, that some who have come to love the feel of a snug pair of panties have grown out of the life. They say they've just tossed it aside like an old, chunky-heeled shoe. Of course, some people still claim to see Jim Morrison hanging around, too.

I think most will tell you, though, that it never really goes away. It certainly hasn't for me, no matter what I tell myself. No matter how many times I throw all my stuff in the dumpster and say "That's it - I'm just a normal guy from here on out," it just doesn't work that way. As with tide and quicksand, I've learned that struggling against it is only going to make things worse.

Don't let that scare you though. It's a weird and wonderful bent on life, if you can wrap your mind around it. The whole wife thing could be a problem, but you'll never know until you tell her. There are loving and accepting SOs out there...

Wishing you well on your journey through these parts (:

[docrobbysherry]

Sounds like your CDing prospects may be scaring u more than her at present, Racing. The problems start when dressing becomes a COMPULSION! Then, u may lose control when your fem counterpart takes over! No suggestions with your SO. Maybe play it by ear?

Good luck!

[ReineD]

Heartracing, I think it's important to share your feelings with your wife now. You don't need to have all the answers or know if you're committed or not before you talk to her, just tell her how you feel and what you'd like to do. You can both meander through this together. Be sure and tell her that you've been attracted to wearing women's clothes since you were a child, but you've not acted on it. And the two of you can start reading literature and decent websites that demystify the CDing.

If you start dressing behind her back in an attempt to "figure it all out", well, it might be years before this happens and by the time you do tell her, she'll feel betrayed. Or, she'll feel even worse if she happens to stumble onto your stash, which will have accumulated if you start dressing regularly.

The best way to know if it's fetish or not is to follow your gut and go along with it, hopefully with your wife's knowledge. Eventually, you'll figure it out. It's different for everyone.

[Tracii G]

You sound pretty understanding to me Snow White.
It is quite confusing to say the least but when that light comes on and you realize just what CDing really is its not so bad.

[larry]

This is another thread that convinces me if anything goes bad with my current family situation I will only see someone I meet that
knows about my love for crossdressing. It is just a no-brainer.

[marion]

Seems that ur wife is already opened minded from what u say. Perhaps she probs already knows that u do more etc and will not be surprised

[heatherdress]

You had a thrill 15 years ago. You do enjoy shoes and panties openly. You now have been thrilled 3 or 4 times dressing. What does that mean? Only you know.

But seems like you would like to continue to explore and enjoy. If these experiences provide enjoyment, excitement, pleasure, escape and if you want to continue, then you should, as Reine suggested, discuss your feelings with your wife. Seems like she would be supportive and you will enjoy your experiences to a much greater degree. Welcome to the site.

[Beverley Sims]

I think you already have your answers, talk to your wife nowa this is important for your future relationship.
You are going to continue what you are doing and this will escalate.
Reine has some sound advice here.
Read all the replies and weigh the information carefully.
Go slow with what you do and consider very carefully your wife's views in the matter.

[ChelseaErtel]

I was on an off. And in my middle fifties I decided to just accept who I am. I'm going to bet it won't pass.

My wife does not know and it would not go very well. I'm not hiding it as much as I used to - I've shaved off all my body hair.

Only you can answer your question. If it feels good, then why not? For me it had an early component of eroticism, but now (just this week) dressing almost full time I find it just to be another part of me that I am comfortable in. I love the process, I love the transformation, the clothes, the shoes, makeup........oh stop me.

I haven't seen anything that anyone has made me, especially when I added visible hairless cleavage, but now that I've been out I don't care. But, I'm on travel, still a closet case in my small VA home.

Good luck and enjoy the forum, its a great place to get advice from all points of the TG/CD compass.

[dallasmann]

The fact that she enjoys having you wear her panties or matching panties has you in a GREAT position, IMO.