my parents found out i crossdress

[simpsonfan]

they found out casue my mom read my journal.
my dad was disappointed and my mom is worried i have been wearing her clothes secretly all these years.
this is really tough.

[Julie]

Hang in there. It's always the worst upon discovery. What you need to do is just be the same person they have always known. Don't change anything and in time they will realize their newfound knowledge doesn't mean they have a son they don't know.

One thing about parents is they tend to love their children no matter what. Your dad will most likely have the toughest time with this. That's expected. Take one step at a time. Make sure you don't let this put a wedge between you ane either of your parents. Keep the lines of communication open.

Good luck and let us know how it's going.

Julie

[Tonia]

Don't worry she will always Love you I told my mother 2 year's ago and she didn't have a problem with it. She told me that she already Discovered this 20 years ago the hole Dam family new. Although I just recently in the past went threw a divorce over my CD My "X” could not handle the fact that I like to dress in Woman’s clothing Don’t figure Hun? So she divorced me. And now I can dress any Dam time I want to!!! And Loving It!!!!

Love Tonia

[Lawren]

It sounds like your parents got past the initial shock without going ballistic. That's a good sign.

[Jill]

My mom confronted me about it when I was a teenager cause she found stuff in my room that wasn't for boys. She told me not to do it anymore, I said ok, but I just made sure that I didn't get caught again. I think it's pretty bogus though that your mom read your journal.

[carolynhcd]

If you have had an historically good relationship with your father, talk to him and tell him that for reasons you don't understand, you need to crossdress. If he is interested and not bellicose about it, perhaps find some books or even let him read some threads on this site. With over 3,000 members on this one site alone, he'll see you are not the only one. There is so much pain and alienation in the subtext of so many entries on this site that he will see what so many of us have undergone in our lives to be what we are. How many posts have you read where girls mention losing their wives over crossdressing? I have never been married because I only want to do it once. I believe that if you make a promise you need to keep it. I have been very deeply in love with 3 or 4 totally hot and gorgeous GG's in my life and have turned down many more. I refused to have sex with the May, 1976, covergirl for Cosmopolitan magazine in 1978 because I thought she was nuts and because I was lamenting the loss of an equally beautiful girl that I had been with for six years (she didn't die, we just had to break up). To quote Stevie Wonder, "Everything must change." Your outing is not the end of the world and there are thousands of us here to help you and support you and to tell you that you are doing what must be done. If only every man would crossdress and find their feminine side I think this world would be a much better place. No sports, no wars, no ravaging of the environment. If all men were more interested in makeup than M-16's, I have to think we'd be better off.

[BoyInLace]

Its too bad they had to find out by accident - I told my Mom about it when I was about 18, and she has always been supportive, although a little nervous about it at first. At least they didn't go ballistic, like Lawren said.
You have lots of support here, don't be afraid to ask for help ;) - we've all been through it.

[kristi cd]

It is a shame the way they found out, but you can't change that now. I'm not really sure how to help since no one (I know of at least) knows about my dressing. Just know we're always here for ya if you need us. ;)

[Collette]

Right now its rough! As time passes, it will wear down the sharp edges that are heir apparent. The truth shall set you free! Collette

[Amelie]

This is a tough spot to be in. Some how there should be some type of talking to be done. If you live at home still and don't have the option to leave, then you probably have to go with what your parents say. You don't want an argument and then get thrown out on your butt. If you live away from your parents, then like the others said here go slow and talk when you can. Try not to argue, a shouting match won't help things. You know inside of yourself, you're going to be a CD. You are not going to change that, what you have to change is how your parents feel about the dressing(With-out arguing).
Good Luck in what you choose to do.
Love Amelie

[LaurenAnne]

Well I must say good luck w/ however you decide to deal w/ this, simpsonfan. It might have been easier if it were just your mother who found out, but w/ dad involved, things may become sticky. I don't know you or your father, so I couldn't say either way.

While not quite to the caliber of your situation, I was "sorta" discovered when I was about 17 years old. I had forgotten to set things back after a raid of my mother's closet... when she returned home from work she simply asked me "Have you been in my closet?". I was mortified, but replied w/ a simple "no". The subject was never brought up again, and my mother and I continue to share an excellent relationship. So while things may seem bad now, I have a feeling everything will work out in the end. Again, good luck! :)

[Katie Boundary]

((((Simpsonfan)))) don't worry. :)

[jessicadiane]

Simpsonfan,
My parents caught me crossdressing when I was younger in my teens.My dad walked in on me wearing half dressed.I was wearing my mom's pantyhose,bra,slip,and blouse.I had almost had the skirt on when my dad caught me.It was the worst feeling.I wanted to crawl under a rock. I can understand what it is like to be found out by your parents.Good luck in dealing with this.You will get through it.I did :)

[clarissa3d]

Hey sweety,
As you can tell we all have had some type of unexpected discovery. You and your parents are still the same people. Depending on your parents response researching it for them will help them understand.
I am 41 years old and my mother passed away several years ago and I will never know if she really understood what was going on when she found all the girl clothes hidden in my closet.
We never talked about it and I wish i had. My father is still alive and I know he knows but we do not talk about it. keeping that in mind I do have a good relationship with my father.

If you need to talk it out we are here. I am praying for you and your parents to get through this with a positive direction. A parents true love will stand the test of time.

Big hug

[Ava Mouse]

If I had a son and I caught him crossdressed, I'd scold him for going through MY stuff! :p

Seriously, though, I can understand that they didn't want you going through their stuff, that's private, but if you had your own, that's 1/2 the problem solved I'd think. Mom might feel violated in that sense. Apologize for this at least, it's the right thing to do.

I WISH I outed myself at a younger age, and I would have gladly taken on the wrath of Mom and Dad, and I would have dressed no matter how mad they got. My parents gave me a hard time when I started drawing women, but I continued anyway. I pointed out that my pictures weren't dirty, so they eventually gave up. I was determined to develop this talent that they didn't appreciate.

So, in summary, apologize for violating their privacy, but not for crossdressing. Get your own stuff, hide it well if necessary. I'm not telling you to lie or be deceitful, but if you're not doing anything illegal or damaging, and they're not happy with it, it's the path of least resistance till you're independent.

I wish I was more independent, too. Even after college, I lived at home and worked till I got married. Not good. I should've gotten an apartment as soon as I started working. I HIGHLY recommend this, too.

Do it while you're young and passable. Overcome the fear of buying your own stuff. You can easily mail order, too, if you have your own place. Go out dressed on Halloween, take every opportunity to enjoy it. I missed out on sooo many great opportunities to dress up with friends, I regret not taking advantage of those times! Now that I'm married and have kids, opportunities are few and far between. Especially with those of us still in the closet.

[chantelle]

May this moment see you through because there is hope and close on three thousand supportive friends out here who look out for your heart.Great is she who can face her demons and survive to tell it as the greatest tale of all.
The worst is over and you can rest assured that telling anyone else from now on will seem like a walk in a well defended park,Love chantelle.