I Need to Thank You All for the Courage!

[EllenJo]

Just want to say that coming here and reading posts have given me many things but most of all it has given me courage. I am a CD in a DADT situation with the wife. She is OK with panties and pantyhose but has always drawn the line there. After reading a lot of posts and taking in much of the wisdom on this site I have been able to see a way forward. Yesterday I shaved my legs (God it feels fabulous) and she did not even notice. I have started a conversation with her about wearing skirts around the house when I am not going out anywhere and once I showed her the mid calf chambry skirt that I want she did not recoil in disgust, just said she was surprised it wasn't a mini skirt. This got us onto the thread of how I really see myself when I dress. I explained that at my age (59) I do not want to look like a teenager but really as a man who is comfortable in some women's clothes that are appropriate for how I want to feel. I let her know that I love her only and just want to live out the rest of my life being me. She promised me that we would talk more about this tomorrow after Church. She then kissed me and smiled. Best talk we have ever had about my CD tendencies.

I have all of you to thank for giving me the courage to bring it up in a way that did not threaten her. I don't know where it will go but at least we are on the way. There is so much wisdom and diversity of opinion here and it is a Blessing.
Thank You
EllenJo

[MarcyRex]

Congrats. Amazing what communication (listening, hearing, understanding, empathy) accomplishes.

[Lady Catherine]

Looks like the lines of comunication are open. That's a very important first step. I wish you the best moving forward.

[suzy1]

This is nice to read EllenJo. This is THE place to come for help and advice isn’t it!

Tread softly with her [I know you will] and look forward to a happy life together.

Thank you for telling us. I do like a happy thread.:)

SUZY

[Beverley Sims]

Here is more tread softly advice and I hope your future relationship develops the way you want.

[Cynthia Anne]

That's what this place is all about! Glad to hear it's working so well for you!

[jackielou]

hello ellen jo your wife sounds alot like my fiance she does not like me to talk about my bra and panties even though she know i wear a bra 24/7 panties and pantyhose when cold and i have just started shaving my legs and it feels wonderful i have hinted at this she has hinted at knowing that but she prefers to hear me say my UNDERWARE WAS SOAKING WET FROM SWEAT and not my bra and panties ,she knows i have large breast and has seen me naked but as of yet she has not seen me in just a bra and panties taking it slow she is a wonderful loving woman and i love her and hope to marry her .

[bridget thronton]

It is wonderful that the dialog has moved forward

[Tracii G]

Go at a pace that is comfy for her.

[flatlander_48]

It is always important to be clear about what you want, but some degree of flexibility never hurts. To flip it around, how would you feel if you were backed into a corner? That never feels very good, so why would we want to do that to someone else?

[Inna]

LOL, so what is that teen doing in your AVATAR..........................????
Small steps hon, but I guess, you already know this, and yes this interaction, and interactions like this open eyes to the world of openness and engulfment.

[MsRenee]

Your doing it the right wqy and talking about it before you come out and do it. So thats good to hear and that she will talk more about is even better. I agree with the no mini skirt I kinda lije it just above my knee preferably. But hugs on this far.
Renee

[Vanessa Amber420]

I agree this forum is a great for a cd to come for advice.

[EllenJo]

Thank you all for your comments, advice and support. I will take it slow and let her set the pace. One of the things that I have learned here is that the Pink Fog can overwhelm a spouse and I have no intentions of letting that happen. If all we ever do is talk, at least we got that far. Hopefully it will go well.

[Meghan]

Yay! Thank you for sharing your experience, it may very well give someone else the courage to step forward!

And yes, wow, the feeling of just shaved legs is one of the most interesting and wonderful textures on the planet. Not hair is so much better than hair!

Meghan

[Roberta Marie]

It's great that the lines of communication have opened. But remember that the most important part of communication is listening. Today you had your say and she listened. Tomorrow is her time to give her thoughts and fellings and your time to listen. And it's important to not listen with the intent of forming a response or rebuttle, but rather to listen with the intent of understanding what she is saying, what her feelings are.

I have to admit, though, that I cringed when you said that you shaved your legs without discussing it with your wife.