Crossroad

[Michelle V]

I have reached another crossroad in my life, I have been trying to appear more feminine and have stopped working out as a male would, I no longer work on my upper body and therefore have lost upper body strength, my wife doesn't mind even thought when we met it was for her a favorite feature of mine. My children have also notice, they have booth mention my "flabby arms" more than once. I am ok with it, I know why I am doing it but I might need to regress and get in male shape again because it might be affecting my job performance.

As mentioned before I work in the health industry, I am part of the department in my hospital responsible for attending and participating in "blue codes" meaning emergencies that involve CPR, compressions and intubation of patients in the verge of death. Just last night during a very tough code I realized that by not having my old upper body strength I put my patient at risk of dying, I can usually go for long periods giving compressions which are necessary to keep people alive, I noticed that I have gradually lost my ability to maintain appropriate compressions and I know it is because of my lifestyle, I know this lifestyle affects people in different ways and I thought I had it great because of the support I get at home, never realizing how it affects other aspects of my life.

I am writing this to decompress, I figured this to be the best place to do it, among the people that might understand that it is hard trying to look like a woman and having other responsibilities that might require to be done a a man.

[TxCassie]

Michelle, I know exactly the situation. I also need some muscularity in my job. I gone through phases where I've stopped working out, concentrated on cardio only. It works, but we as males, rely on our muscularity so much to live the lives we live. So, I've learn it's all about balance, acceptance, and going forward. Realize our physical limitations and work with them. Good Luck.

[kellycan27]

Girls don't or can't do what you do? Your T is showing :heehee:

[reb.femme]

..............I might need to regress and get in male shape again because it might be affecting my job performance.
.....I can usually go for long periods giving compressions which are necessary to keep people alive, I noticed that I have gradually lost my ability to maintain appropriate compressions and I know it is because of my lifestyle, I know this lifestyle affects people in different ways and I thought I had it great because of the support I get at home, never realizing how it affects other aspects of my life.

Hi Michelle,

Not being a medical professional in anyway and not knowing your training regime, but purely from a lay person outlook, would your cardio fitness be the area to concentrate on rather than strength. I used to run a lot and do circuit training with light weights as I was only interested in my cardio vascular fitness and being trim, than looking like Lou Ferrigno. :battingeyelashes:

I can fully understand your concern with feeling that you are somehow letting people down but I think that is a harsh personal assessment. Plus you are entitled to live your life too.

Rebecca

[Laura912]

I have watched female physicians, nurses, medical students, and nurse anesthetists do CPR. It does not take a lot of upper body strength. Using you weight helps. You can tone the upper body, get rid of the flab, and be fit for responding to the codes. Go for it!

[Michelle V]

I can fully understand your concern with feeling that you are somehow letting people down but I think that is a harsh personal assessment. Plus you are entitled to live your life too.

Thank you for the support

[Leah Lynn]

I do hope there is a happy medium for you. I haven't performed CPR in many years, but I know that I can't lift as much as I used to. After my MI, I lost a lot of upper body mass, some due to medication. For me, the good part is that the overly developed pecs have turned into a fair pair of boobs.

[Roberta Marie]

I'm a retired firefighter/paramedic, and was a BLS and ACLS instructor. Although it's been a few years, I learned that CPR is done by keeping your arms straight, with your shoulders over the patient's sternum, with your hips being a pivot point. By relying on your weight and back muscles rather than your arm muscles you can perform more consistant chest compressions for a longer period of time. I've seen women that weighed less than 120 lbs perform effective CPR.


Also, I would suggest that you change your workout routine to emphasize toning rather than bulk and strength. Rather than a few reps at high weight, try more reps at lower weight. This will allow you to have more feminine looking arms without the muscle turning to flab.

[rocketscientist]

Hi Michelle. I can understand this as well. My job requires some heavy lifting at times. I went on a diet and lost some 25+ pounds. Upside= I can wear a smaller size dress. Downside= I have noticed I can't lift the things I used to. So now I'm just trying to find that happy medium. Hugs,Tonya

[kimdl93]

I know this is a challenge...but I would look for some sort of middle ground. How about higher reps with lighter weight. You'll maintain muscle tone but may be able to develop slimmer arms and maintain the ability to do you full work requirements.

[Cheryl T]

There is a difference between being in shape and being bulked up. You don't have to body build to maintain muscles...just do toning exercises.
I too work in an industry which requires me to have some upper body strength and although I don't work out for mass I do keep toned and it's been sufficient to keep pace with my work and not make me seem like a female body builder.

[Kate Simmons]

Only you can decide if your livelihood is more important than being and feeling feminine or vice versa Hon. No one else can decide that for you. Good luck.:)

[linda allen]

Unless there is a strength test for the job, I wouldn't worry too much about it. Chances are there are GGs doing the same job and they typically have less muscle than males.

I never was as strong as many of my co-workers but I made up for it with "smarts". You should be able to do the same.

[MsRenee]

Nothing wrong with a litte toned body just dont look muscular and your be just fine. Any one can perform cpr doesnt matter body size hun.If you like doing what you do then body looks shouldnt matter.
Renee