Spotted Shopping

[kimberly ann487]

The other day my wife said that someone told her they spotted me going into a local shoe store. The idea that someone we know saw me dressed doesn't bother me, but that I was recognized was disappointing. I guess I don't blend in as well as I thought, lol. Any other thoughts on this ?

[Stephanie47]

That's why I don't go out en femme and mingle. My outings have been in the dark. As I get older it is more difficult to look like a woman, especially at six foot even and 195 lbs. When I look at myself in a mirror, I do not look the same as in a photo. I think eyes see what I want to appear as, rather than how I actually look. That's both in male and femme modes.

[Jenniferathome]

You are disappointed that they saw the "male" you through your makeup and clothing? You are YOU after all. Given that you did not see them, is there something distinctive about your walk or your face that would more likely give you away?

[kimberly ann487]

You are disappointed that they saw the "male" you through your makeup and clothing? You are YOU after all. Given that you did not see them, is there something distinctive about your walk or your face that would more likely give you away?
More than likely yes to all of your questions, Jennifer. I guess a little reality check is good once in a while.

[Jenniferathome]

More than likely yes to all of your questions, Jennifer. I guess a little reality check is good once in a while.

So, what can you change to make this less likely to occur? Hair color? Mannerisms? Get objective and you can address this with some degree of success but again, you are you;-)

[franlee]

Kimberly, I think that since you don't mind them seeing you dressed and there wasn't any impolite or demeaning rederic you may want to consider it a positive event. After all you are dressing nice to be seen as a well dressed person, and the fact that someone that knows you recognised you is only natural. Besides the way you present yourself from the pictures I've seen you should be proud!

[~Joanne~]

So they saw you and mentioned it? big deal doesn't sound all that bad unless a lot more was said that you haven't mentioned, I agree, You should look at this as a positive adventure, Your out and about and miles ahead of a lot of us in that department. I also agree that you look great in all your pictures so this should be a non event ;)

[Angela Campbell]

If you don't want to be spotted don't go out where anyone you know will be...like another town or something. If you don't care then don't worry about them recognizing you. You will always look like you and some people will always see it.

[JamieQ]

If you don't want to be spotted don't go out where anyone you know will be...like another town or something. If you don't care then don't worry about them recognizing you. You will always look like you and some people will always see it.

Yes, I go shopping enfemme out of town. However I have even walked my own block enfemme way before sunset...and I am not really out. I do not yet think people would put 2 and 2 together, but I may be fooling myself.

[RainyNightGirl]

I do not think that being recognised should be any detraction from you blending in. You are still you, you are dressing to be you. I would take this as a positive experience. I wish you the best

Natasha

[rookiemistake]

I'm definitely on board with going out away from your home town. There's too much for me to lose in my home town. I'm in a place where it isn't highly accepted, so I try not to do anything within sight of people I may know. It would mortify me, but it seems everything is okay, unless your wife is upset about it or something...

[kimdl93]

People who know us have an advantage in seeing past the facade. Our distinctive facial features show through. That doesn't mean you can't blend, it merely means your not wearing a disguise.

[lingerieLiz]

The older we get the harder it is to hide. At 19 I could pass and did! Even girls didn't realize I was a guy. Double dated once. Today my facial characteristics are a dead give away as to who I am. I wear womens clothes, dress androginous most of the time, wear a bra, but don't kid myself that I look like the women my age.

[Cynthia Anne]

I have been spotted all over the world! I refuse to worry about who see me! OH! Wait I'm not Elves! Never mind!
Be yourself; be proud!!!!!

[linda allen]

...... As I get older it is more difficult to look like a woman, .........
...... The older we get the harder it is to hide. .....

Perhaps this is because we're still trying to look like a 20 year old woman. Surely we can look like a bag lady!

Seriously, how many of us "older" crossdressers are wearing conservative outfits and short grey wigs? Perhaps that's the problem.

[Michelle (Oz)]

Seriously, how many of us "older" crossdressers are wearing conservative outfits and short grey wigs? Perhaps that's the problem.
I agree with your point Linda, blending is a large part of passing, but that would sure take the fun out of going out dressed. I guess eventually my dressing age will catch up with my biological age.

[Beverley Sims]

What was their reaction to seeing you dressed.
That is the big question that concerns me?

[Jenny Doolittle]

Yes, What was the reaction of the friend of your wife, and what was your wife's reaction to her telling her?

If your wife is still kewl with you going out, what does it matter?

[bridget thronton]

Short grey hair (page boy length and cut) for me and fairly conservative clothes and make up (Sigh i have gotten older)

[Sharon B.]

For me to go to another town I would have to go about two states away know way to many people even an hour away would be too close for me.

[Jorja]

I have to laugh when I see the "go to another town" advise. Back when I first started going out and about, I would do exactly that, go to another town. Everything was going great. I was enjoying myself after not being able to be me all those years. So one day myself and a couple of girlfriends decided to hit the mall for some shopping. As we came around a corner we walked directly into my brother and his wife. My face was no more than 3" away from my brothers as we collided. I backed up wanting to run and just get the hell out of there but I didn't. I said sorry sir and stepped around him and continued on my way. As I went on I heard him say, crazy little broad needs to watch where she is going!

[JamieQ]

I have to laugh when I see the "go to another town" advise. Back when I first started going out and about, I would do exactly that, go to another town. Everything was going great. I was enjoying myself after not being able to be me all those years. So one day myself and a couple of girlfriends decided to hit the mall for some shopping. As we came around a corner we walked directly into my brother and his wife. My face was no more than 3" away from my brothers as we collided. I backed up wanting to run and just get the hell out of there but I didn't. I said sorry sir and stepped around him and continued on my way. As I went on I heard him say, crazy little broad needs to watch where she is going!

Yes...its a small world. I have run into someone from my hometown when we were over 2hrs away. I was in guy mode with my wife, but most interesting if I were out enfemme and had a close encounter like that I think the slipping by would also happen. I went and bought a 2L coke today 10 miles from home and I know quite a few people there. I think being recognized in a quick encounter is very unlikely...more likely to be recognized getting in the car though....but then again a bunch of these little cars look alike. Maybe I am just fooling myself...