Pretend...ing ???

[Courtneigh]

Who are YOU ? or who are you Not ?

I guess we all do ALOT of pretending...everyday ? It is unfortunate but what alternative is there really ?

It is not that easy for all of us to "BE".

The question here is ; whoe are YOU pretending to be...or not to be ???

I personally, myself...I am not pretending to be a Girl...that is who I am...I am pretendingto be this guy, this male-figure who fits in with society and the way I've been brought-up t be...to fit into the circle of daily life and circumstances. To please all else in what they see and meet...HEARTBREAKING ???

I hate living a double life but I can't yet be who I am full time...not yet !

I ama Girl, a Woman first and foremost...all I ever wanted to be !
I live that life as much as I can, and instead of doing "manly" stuff I'd much rather shop for shoes, fasion and make-up.
I'd much rather do some other girls mak-up and nails and help her choose an outfit than watch football or whatever !

So who are you ?

I AM COURTNEIGH :thumbsup:

[docrobbysherry]

Interesting post, Courtneigh. I've been thinking a lot about this later. Because your question goes MUCH deeper than the gender/sex u r or wish to be. Figuring out exactly who u r takes a life time, at best.

I'm in my 60's and still discovering new things about me all the time. And, I've many questions for myself that remain unanswered!

[RileyEvans]

I'm the same way. I work in a common male job trying to give the image of just one of the guys. But behind closed doors I get to be the girl that I feel I should have been.

[Lady Catherine]

To be honest here, I don't pretend to be anyone I'm not. I am perfectly content as either Glen or Catherine, and concider myself fortunate to be able to know them both. I sincerely wish those of you who have to hide who you truly are the best of luck in getting to where you want to be. No one should have to hide.

[franlee]

Only time I'm pretending is when I'm in a roleplaying situation and that has nothing to do with who I am. So all this questioning who you are is only relivant to you. No two of us are the same, just have some shared ideas and feelings. My two cents worth on the subject is to learn to love and accept yourself and then your will have your answer!

[Joanne f]

There are times when I wish it was one big pretend then I could at least say that I do it for fun and nothing else, or maybe it has been one big pretend on trying to be a man :heehee: should be a :straightface: really

[Ashley Lyn]

I, on the other hand, thoroughly enjoy being a man and am only attracted to women.. :battingeyelashes: However, it was not always easy for me to meet women, so I turned myself into the girl/woman I hoped I would sometime meet.. :heehee: unfortunately, I enjoyed it..!! Love the frilly, silky things.. and dressing as a woman, tho' I tend to dress 'younger' than I really am!! I don't feel as tho' I am pretending.. I'm just able to be myself as a man and sorta' as a woman... Guess I like being a "guy in girls clothes" and getting away with it!!:)

[SamanthaC]

Personally I'm not pretending to be anyone in particular. From an external point of view, clothes only suggest how people and the world should perceive me. Those I choose to talk to and share my actual identity with will see me in the correct light no matter what I'm wearing. It's just a fact that I limit the amount of people I reveal my true identity to those who need to know only :).

Still, I don't give a flying f#@! what the world thinks of me. I have hung out with female friends while they look at / try on shoes or make-up etc. I tell you what though, even doing that makes any bloke look like a fish out of water! I was rather out of place, but again, wasn't fussed in how the world saw that... it's the world's issue to deal with :). That said, I'm so much less experienced and developed in terms of incorporating my growing femme side into my life. There are likely issues ahead I've not considered or thought about.

[5150 Girl]

Yes, the "ugly side" of me is the pretender. Wynonna is the real me.

[Brianna612]

I do what everyone else does. I wear work appropriate clothes to work and comfy clothes on my time. So my comfy clothes consists of dresses, skirts and blouses. No pretending here. I love doing my nails while watching football.

[Samantha43]

I'm simply your average guy with an unusual hobby.

[heatherdress]

"Who am I?" - perhaps that is what life is all about. Continual searching, discovery, change, growth. Awareness.

Who we are is more important than who we pretend to be or what we appear to be to others.

[Marguarite]

Who am I ? That is a constantly changing, forever morphing, chasing the end of the a rainbow answer.

I can only hope to enjoy the ride, and maybe make a few discoveries and treasures along the way.

[Megan Briana]

I, on the other hand, thoroughly enjoy being a man and am only attracted to women.. :battingeyelashes: However, it was not always easy for me to meet women, so I turned myself into the girl/woman I hoped I would sometime meet.. :heehee: unfortunately, I enjoyed it..!! Love the frilly, silky things.. and dressing as a woman, tho' I tend to dress 'younger' than I really am!! I don't feel as tho' I am pretending.. I'm just able to be myself as a man and sorta' as a woman... Guess I like being a "guy in girls clothes" and getting away with it!!:)

THis sounds a lot like me, as far as being the woman i would like to meet. Along the way, I get to play with the fashions of women that have one or more characteristics of what I am looking for in a woman. My one vanity is I love the fashions of the college girls. I may be nearing forty, but boy would I love to have started this twenty years ago. I get to be that young woman behind clothes doors, and as the opportunity to go out becomes a norm, I plan to go out dress age-appropiate, with an occasional super sexy jeans and top night out.

[Lady Slipper]

I love doing my nails while watching football.

Lol, I'm doing that right now!

Back on topic, I'm trying to figure out where the mask I show the world ends and real me begins. I think I'm making progress on that front, thanks to Cd.com and the wonderful people here. :)

[Beverley Sims]

I, on the other hand, thoroughly enjoy being a man and am only attracted to women.. :battingeyelashes: However, it was not always easy for me to meet women, so I turned myself into the girl/woman I hoped I would sometime meet.. :heehee: unfortunately, I enjoyed it..!! Love the frilly, silky things.. and dressing as a woman, tho' I tend to dress 'younger' than I really am!! I don't feel as tho' I am pretending.. I'm just able to be myself as a man and sorta' as a woman... Guess I like being a "guy in girls clothes" and getting away with it!!:)

This says it all but I do need the man's job to earn money.
I am able to be myself as a woman and sorta" as a man. :)

[Angela Campbell]

When I was a child I was taught to be a boy. I was expected to be a boy so I did what I was told. All of my life I have been pretending to be a male and built a life of being a man. I am a woman through and through. Inside I am a woman outside I must play a part like any good actress does and convince others of what I am supposed to be. Sometimes I play the male part anyway.

[noeleena]

Hi,

To pretend or act pretending,

did i, no because i knew who i was / am. from age 10. never pushed in to a role , i was able to do things i liked go where i liked & enjoyed my self by myself, though did meet up with others as well. Mom never forced me to do things, like thats only for boys or girls, i did both,

where did i see myself over the years, in the middle, & being different, i had to grow & learn that was hard, yet got through that even some hardships really did help me to be strong as a person.

So your ? is really did i conform to , being a male or female, no i was my own person it was never about being male or female, & as i can look back it was about being both male / female, not one or the other, so my name says both male & female .
The first part of noel is in my maleness & noeleena is in my femaleness, thats were i am & thats where im the most happyest,

Yes im accepted as a full female / woman & in womens groups , it does not take away from me who i am, & for some of us it can be a real blessing when we can accept our selfs as we should,. does not mean perfect just means we dont have to prove who we are, .

...noeleena...

[Cynthia Anne]

I don't pretend to be anything! I'm me! Take me the way I am or leave me the way I am! Either way is fine with me!

[Foxglove]

Sometimes I pretend to be young, beautiful and happy. In my more rational moments I'd settle for happy, and I'm working on that.

Annabelle

[Jocelyn Quivers]

A very close friend who knows both my male and female sides, basically said I should have been an actor (male mode). Seeing the 2 extreme differences in my male and femme appearances and she would never have thought the smiling happy cheery girl exist inside of the rough grumpy bland male exterior. As for the original question I will answer it with one of my favorite songs, "I Am, I'm Me!" By Twisted Sister!!!!!!!!!!

[Cheryl T]

I don't pretend anything...this is who I am and who I have always been.

[Courtneigh]

None of us should...or should have to...but unfortunately it is not the same for all of us...I just want to be me !!! Nothing more and nothing less !!!

[Kate Simmons]

Okay but in all reality, many genetic girls do so called "manly things" and are into sports, etc. I personally think we are limiting ourselves if we "lock in" to any certain way of thinking or doing things. Just my 2 cents.:battingeyelashes::)

[sometimes_miss]

I have to agree with part of the original post; I spend many hours a day pretending to be a standard issue guy, to avoid conflict, and keep everyone else in the world happy. So when I'm at home, I allow myself to be what I am; a guy who's simply more comfortable feeling like I am, and dressing, much like a 14 year old girl. I'm fortunate enough to know the difference, but not fortunate enough to have a woman to share my life with, looking at spending the rest of my life, alone. I always find it so hard to accept, that so many women prefer the companionship of men that beat them, mistreat them, lie to them, instead of someone who will love and care for them, but aren't the macho male they need to feel secure. Oh well. life isn't fair, now, is it.

[I Am Paula]

It's only been in the last six months that it has donned on me- I stopped pretending- I'm no longer playing at being a girl. Granted I'll never BE a girl, but living full time has become my new normal. I am woman-hear me shop. -Celeste

[NathalieX66]

I'm what's known as gender fluid. I live life in both genders.

The idea of transitioning to female taunts me every day. So does preferring to be male.

Going out in public dressed as a woman rocks! Having people compliment on my outfit is the best.

Blending in, and/or being ignored rocks too. It makes me feel like the average woman.

[LaraPeterson]

Courtneigh, what's wrong with pretending? I grew up pretending to be a soldier, a cowboy, an astronaut. . .while I was with the boys. When I was alone I pretended to be little girl. I grew up and all the male baggage came with me. But as "I" grew up, so did the little girl. The guy in me does what he has to do to get by in the world, and does a damn good job at it. The girl in me goes along for the ride, enjoys the scenery, and more often than ever before, she shows herself to be a strong woman who knows how to dress, knows how to talk to people, and can make friends every bit as good as that guy. Now, thank goodness, it is "he" that is going along for the ride more often.

But reality being what it is, genetics can be a real b****. So keep on pretending. Reality is hiding in there somewhere.

[CynthiaD]

I'm a woman pretending to be a man. When I dress that's the real me. Oddly enough, I sometimes really enjoy playing the male role. I especially like the "who's more macho" games, because I win more often than not. I think it's hilarious when I win, and I think to myself, "buddy, you just got out-machoed by a woman!"

[Brenda Freeman]

Pretending? What is real? For me I am a man that loves dressing up as a woman and acting feminine when I am. I am not a woman but love the feeling it gives me. Would have loved to been born a woman but am not. I wonder if I was born a woman if I would have the same love and joy of dressing up or would it just be like my male side just clothes? I would miss out on the joy if this were the case. I do wish I could be open to people close to me about this side of me. By not being open am I pretending? I do Know I am having fun, life is short so pretend if you must have fun for sure, Life is short.

[AllyCDTV]

When I'm in guy mode, I'm just a regular guy. When I crossdress, I pretend I'm a porn star.:dom:

[ArleneRaquel]

When I'm in male mode I pretend that I'm liking it, when I'm in female mode I pretend that I'm not an old bag.

[Sarah Doepner]

Sometimes I pretend to be young, beautiful and happy. In my more rational moments I'd settle for happy, and I'm working on that.

Annabelle

Almost what I'd say. When I'm pretending to be young and beautiful, I'm happy. In my more rational moments I work on happy, knowing that no one else will ever see me as the person I THINK I see in the mirror. Oh well, their loss I guess. Actually I prefer to let others pretend they don't see me for what I am, that's much more fun than trying to fool myself.

[Nikki A.]

Pretending is a harsh word. I feel that there are two parts of me and I'm happiest when both sides can co-exist and be out in the open. That said there are tmes when I need to dial back one side or the other, depending on the situation.
I feel comfortable dressed in either mode especially when I can integrate both wardrobes into my everyday wear. There are days when everything I have on is from my Nikki closet and yet I am still in male mode.

[Ms. Laura]

I don't really feel as though, inside, I am one gender or another, I just feel like me. I have to pretend as a guy, as in, hide my predilections for all things girly and check my mannerisms. I don't get out as a girl yet, so I'm not sure how I would act that way, but I don't see the need to hide anything at that point. (except the jewels :)

[Marlana]

More and more, I find my self wanting to be the girl I feel like I am inside. I work with mostly women, so they expect me to act like the man they see. Tall and strong. I just want to wear my womens clothes and do my job, but I have to play the part of who I am on the outside. I stand with you.

[suchacutie]

Luckily there is no pretending for me. Sometimes I'm a guy, and I like that guy! Sometimes I'm a girl and I like her too! These two share a database, but are two separate applications running one at a time! :)

[Courtneigh]

Thank you all for your input, all well said and valid.

As someone said; woman don't pretend when they wear guy clothes or do guy things and most people couldn't care less or don't even notice.

That said, why shouldn't we just do the same, take our chances and go with the flow ???