Carrie Ines
11-08-2012, 05:52 PM
Hi
A few years ago i decided that i would buckle down with work and aimed to start my transition before my 30th birthday, i had a plan and it was working much to my amazement it was looking as if this was going to pay off and i could retire from active work (apart from running the odd website from home) and would have enough money to do this properly... Then the recession hit, my company started hemoraging money, investment was pulled and i lost everything. This was not going to happen the way i planned, i was devastated, Square bloody 1!!, my GF also left (best thing really tho as was on the cards anyway but poor timing girl)
But enough about that.
Another plan is in the pipeline now and looks as if it will pay off again but what i've noticed is that i may have been true to my promise after all, and wondered if this happened to any of you out there? Whether this is the natural order of things on this matter or not?...
...I've noticed that i have actually started my transition without realising.
My mannerisms are openly coming out in my day to day life without me feeling to control or hide them, friends, relatives, colleagues, anyone really accepts and doesn't really notice anything wrong, where as before if something slipped out then i'd get funny looks or a "you're being a bit weird"
My jeans are tighter, i'm slimmer, better kept, my hair is longer, i even hold myself and walk in a way i dont feel like im putting a show on anymore and the mirror is getting closer to the eyes gazing into it, and i'm talking when im in boy mode, and for all this i'm much happier.
I've always gravitated toward women socially, but over the past couple of years ive noticed a shift, i am so much more accepted, to the point where girls defend me with things like "so what, he's a girl really if you think about it" (I buzzed for days on hearing that one, and from somebody that doesn't know!) and similar things happen or are said on a regular basis, its kinda like because im more natural its acceptable, weird hey
So my question, to you who are further along the path than I am at this present time, is this. Does this happen to all of us who have to follow this path? Do we actually start transition before we actually know it ourselves?
Carrie x
A few years ago i decided that i would buckle down with work and aimed to start my transition before my 30th birthday, i had a plan and it was working much to my amazement it was looking as if this was going to pay off and i could retire from active work (apart from running the odd website from home) and would have enough money to do this properly... Then the recession hit, my company started hemoraging money, investment was pulled and i lost everything. This was not going to happen the way i planned, i was devastated, Square bloody 1!!, my GF also left (best thing really tho as was on the cards anyway but poor timing girl)
But enough about that.
Another plan is in the pipeline now and looks as if it will pay off again but what i've noticed is that i may have been true to my promise after all, and wondered if this happened to any of you out there? Whether this is the natural order of things on this matter or not?...
...I've noticed that i have actually started my transition without realising.
My mannerisms are openly coming out in my day to day life without me feeling to control or hide them, friends, relatives, colleagues, anyone really accepts and doesn't really notice anything wrong, where as before if something slipped out then i'd get funny looks or a "you're being a bit weird"
My jeans are tighter, i'm slimmer, better kept, my hair is longer, i even hold myself and walk in a way i dont feel like im putting a show on anymore and the mirror is getting closer to the eyes gazing into it, and i'm talking when im in boy mode, and for all this i'm much happier.
I've always gravitated toward women socially, but over the past couple of years ive noticed a shift, i am so much more accepted, to the point where girls defend me with things like "so what, he's a girl really if you think about it" (I buzzed for days on hearing that one, and from somebody that doesn't know!) and similar things happen or are said on a regular basis, its kinda like because im more natural its acceptable, weird hey
So my question, to you who are further along the path than I am at this present time, is this. Does this happen to all of us who have to follow this path? Do we actually start transition before we actually know it ourselves?
Carrie x