Phases of a transwoman

[Tiffany Grace]

I have been dressing with some female article of clothing as far back as I can remember, at around 4 I found mom's nylons and it progressed from there:) Found her black patent leather pumps too.:)

I started going out dressed when I was 15 years old. Throughout the years I did not have a clue who i was, still working on that:) lol

As I look back, for me at least, it seems that my fem persona Tiffany Grace had to go through all the different phases of growing up. I feel like I actually went through my teenage phase not too long ago lol. Speaking only for me, this is the phase where I wore skirts and dresses way to short and super high heels accompanied with all the insecurities of a teen girl. A real drama queen if you ask some folks in my life. During this time i also over did it shopping and buying just wild ensembles, which has left me with items I will probably not wear. I don't in anyway think that this is the norm and I don't speak for anyone else but if you experienced something similar I wish to hear from you.

Now I find myself in a different phase, enjoying dressing differently, I am enjoying nude nylons, which I never liked before, I always went dark. I am enjoying dressing just a tad more elegant, though I will still go ****ty at a moment's notice:D if the mood is right, but seriously, I am enjoying this new calmer phase, my teen years were wild, had to borrow without asking regarding dresses etc. Today I am thrilled I no longer have to do that but more than that I am enjoying this phase of my life which seem less manic than my earlier ones.

And I like being who I am all the time now, in my teen years i both loved and hated myself, especially after masterbation:) If I can be so honest. Today I am comfortable in my "own skin" and have a greater self acceptance than I have ever known before, which just fills me with inexpressible JOY. to be continued...:D

I just hope, someday, I don't tell you I love wearing house dresses like mom used to. That is a phase I am not looking forward to:daydreaming:

[Kate Simmons]

We experience phases and shifts somewhat different than genetic girls as we usually try to compress a lot of development and experiences into a short time frame. Mostly we don't get to experience a first date, sweet 16 party, prom, etc. as a girl, so later on we may tend to over compensate and try to jam things into our new freedom of self expression. It's all part of the learning and growing as a person curve for a transgender person. In the end, I feel many of us become comfortable with ourselves and make out well though. :)

[Beverley Sims]

What I see here is most of our lives mirrored in some way.
As Kate says we progress through phases and shifts in our personality as well.

[josee]

It sounds like you are growing up. Congratulations on accepting your female self. That is huge.

[suchacutie]

My wife and I have discussed this quite closely. Because Tina appeared quite suddenly at age 55 for me, and because the appearance of Tina was a joint activity between my wife and myself, the "learning curve" was intense. As it began to happen my wife quickly realized it was as if Tina were born and going through the learning curve that she (my wife) went through growing up in the process of becoming socialized as a woman. That realization opened up a long conversation that is still going on. It gave us some grounding/standard with which to judge Tina's progress. Obviously there were the trials and errors with makeup, the issue of a "look" for Tina, hair, size of breastforms, diet, how to deal with nails...the list is endless!

It's rather comforting to know that we aren't the only ones who had to go through this learning curve! In fact, it's comforting to be normal!

[kimdl93]

Like most of us, your self image has evolved. What's great is that you've found a place where you are indeed comfortable in your own skin. Self acceptance of ourselves - getting past that love / hate phase - is the critical step in our maturation. Congratulations!

[docrobbysherry]

Like, Tina, my dressing didn't waken in my 50's. I started with "house dresses" and it took years for Sherry to develop. Now going thru her early teen years with the accompanying sexual excitement. Which can be challenging when I'm in my 60's! However, I hope Sherry settles into more conservative modes as she approaches her 20's. Or, she may be the death of ME by then!

I kept those house dresses in the hope that I may want to wear them again one day. A faint hope at this point!

[Angela Campbell]

Although I have been wearing womens clothes since 4 or 5, I just this summer went all the way with makeup wig and dressing entirely as a woman. I find I am pretty much the same age as a woman as I am as a man. I tend to wear classy ladylike outfits, never too sexy but never very slouchy either. Pretty much like a woman in her 40's or 50's may wear to work in an office.

[Jaymees22]

Hi Tiffany, I experimented with dressing as a teenager, then didn't do it again until around 6 months ago, I'm 67 now, so I've been making up for 50yrs lost time. Sometimes I dress over the top then other times more conservatively I guess it has to do with my mood that day. No matter how I'm dressed it certainly feels good when I am. My mom never wore housedresses, so hopefully I won't get that urge. Please check out my home page link. Hugs Jaymee

[flatlander_48]

While I wouldn't characterize my feelings as Joy, there is certainly a significant degree of relief. When you worry about every mannerism and movement that comes up in maintaining a masculine persona, when you don't do that (or most of the time), it frees up time and effort that can be used elsewhere. It also helped than this past Monday I wore a bra to work for the first time. I've underdressed below to waist for the last 6 or 7 years, but this was the first time above the waist. Today, for the second time, I wore a pair of women's 3" wedge-heeled tassel loafers.

There are reasons that explain why we do what we do. However, as varied as they are, we should remember what matters is being able to express the person inside.

[Tiffany Grace]

We experience phases and shifts somewhat different than genetic girls as we usually try to compress a lot of development and experiences into a short time frame. Mostly we don't get to experience a first date, sweet 16 party, prom, etc. as a girl, so later on we may tend to over compensate and try to jam things into our new freedom of self expression. It's all part of the learning and growing as a person curve for a transgender person. In the end, I feel many of us become comfortable with ourselves and make out well though. :)

Very well said Kate. In retrospect, I was almost amused at how development and growth as a human being, either in a dress or not, is always a process, the pace depends on the individual. I believe I am a classic case of "arrested development." Nevertheless, I love the walk so far.

[AmyGaleRT]

Hmm...I mostly started with nightgowns, so I guess you could say "Amy" started out asleep and is now wide awake and enjoying the "morning" of her existence! :)

- Amy

[Tiffany Grace]

Hmm...I mostly started with nightgowns, so I guess you could say "Amy" started out asleep and is now wide awake and enjoying the "morning" of her existence! :)

- Amy

I started with Mom's nylons at 4:eek::heehee::doh:

[I Am Paula]

Like most I went through phases. As a child, just being girly, and getting a laugh from the adults wearing my sisters nighty. As a teen, I stole (I called it borrowing) my sisters stuff, my mom's wig and experimenting with make up. I must have looked a fright. In my mid twenties, at university in Paris, Celeste was born, the closet doors flew open, and she hit the streets in full drag queen mode. I would have had to tone it down to get to flambouyant. At 30 moved to Toronto, made some TG friends, and while still a little over the top, toned it down a lot. More Streetwalker. I was still only hanging out in the gay area, so pink lipstick and platinum blonde was OK. 38 years old, got married...again...moved to the 'burbs, and 'Blending in Celeste' was born. I started dressing like a GG, playing with my band in drag, and slowly went to just staying en femme, or something like it, 23/7. As my blending became more of 'me' than 'dressing up', I dropped the butt and hips, and the waist cincher, got smaller forms, or just push the moobs up into a pushup bra, and grew my natural hair out. Call it 'earth mother' celeste. Of all my incarnations, I finally fit in, am comfortable as I'm going to get in a male body (sigh), and I no longer cringe when I see a male face looking back from the mirror.-Celeste

[secretgurly]

.....my earliest memories is playing with my mums clothes basket waiting to be washed - especially with her tights (pantyhose for my American cousins:)
I did have an early encounter being dressed in my female cousins clothes though. I was about 5 and I was at her house & fell into the fishpond & got soaked!
I didn't have clean clothes, so her mum put me into a pair of her knickers and a dress! I don't remember any real 'excitement' about it, but who knows? Perhaps this insignificant, innocent act of putting me in my cousins dress and knickers had a profound affect on me?
X

[Tiffany Grace]

HI Celeste, great to read about your journey. After reading the many posts it is great to see the natural progression, development and stages of our lives.

In earlier times of my life I used to think a lot about hormones but with time I have come to really love my body as is. I support and respect all folks who undergo HRT and SRS in seeking to become their true self.:)

[Angela Campbell]

I really think I went through the growing up stage as a female in my dreams. Since I can remember I am usually a female when I dream. I faked being a male for society's sake in the daytime but I always thought of myself as a girl. When I was younger I loved garters and stockings, very short skirts and now I am much more subdued when dressing. Of course when I was young I rarely got past wearing the underclothes.

[Mollyanne]

I don't think that I had "phases" of my crossdressing so to speak, but I do remember when it started (age 12, mom's nylons, garter belt, panties and bra), progressed to mom's skirts, dresses, blouses and heels, then to make-up. I remember only wanting to become a girl (AND STILL DO). I don't think that I ever went through the "confused teenager thing" as a girl but as a teenage boy trying to find his way, well that's another story. All this happened and is still somewhat happening to this day and it has been over 50 years.

Molly

[Tiffany Grace]

Thanks Molly, I recall fascination with tights and superheroes, I was crazy for tights as a child, and it seems to have developed and led to much much more.