I took a ballroom dance lesson en femme!

[Alison Lewis]

I recently met a GG on Craigslist and we met at a mall to go shopping with me dressed en femme, but I don't pass. It turns out Estée Lauder was giving free makeovers at Macy's, so of course, we got them (and I spent $200 on makeup and brushes). The girls were extremely nice and fussed over me. It was a little nerve racking as the chair was facing the escalator so I felt like I was on display.

At 5 pm, she had to go, and I had some time before I was expected home (my wife doesn't know, I know, I know, I'm playing with fire), and I didn't want to take the makeup off, so I went to a ballroom dance studio for a beginner group lesson. It's been a fantasy of mine to be the lady at ballroom dance lessons, being led, and standing with the women when they separate the genders.

This was a huge step for me. I was really nervous going in. When I got to the lesson a couple of minutes late, I joined the women. When it was time for men to pick a partner, one man got "stuck" with me and laughed it off. We rotated partners. Some men laughed a little and avoided eye contact. Some were perfect gentlemen and introduced themselves. One asked if I had been there before. One man left the rotation right before it was his turn to dance with me.

After an hour, I still felt uncomfortable and decided it wasn't fair to the men, so I left. I can't believe that I found the courage to go, and wish I could tell the men how much their tolerance and in some cases friendliness means to me.

FYI, this was in Northern California. I can think of plenty of places where this would have been very unwise.

[Beverley Sims]

You do have to present as female when going out.
You do need to get your wife on side as well.
With your level of bravado you confidence level should be high.

[Ineke Vashon]

I recently met a GG on Craigslist and we met at a mall to go shopping with me dressed en femme, (my wife doesn't know, I know, I know, I'm playing with fire),I can't believe that I found the courage to go....,



Since you found the courage, now go tell your wife, before the GG you met on Craigslist becomes the match that lights the bonfire.

Ineke

[Amy R Lynn]

I have to agree here. You are certainly playing with fire. Metting up with a GG that you met on Craigslist sounds like a recipe for disaster for you and your wife. You really need to be cautious. Letting your SO in on this side of you is a challenge all of its own.

It sounds like you had a fantastic Girls day out! Sounds like a LOT of fun! I have been thinking about taking some dance lessons. I don't know that I could be as brave as you and show up dressed En-Femm.... It sounds like it was wonderful.

[Kate Simmons]

Glad you had fun. I have considered something like this many times but I know it would open a "can of worms' and begin a forward motion that would be hard to stop. It would be hard for me to keep the dressing in perspective as socially I would want to proceed as a woman. This is always in the back of my mind as I basically enjoy dancing in front of others. The socialization alone would be hard to resist. I can really fulfill both roles and being a woman socially is quite tempting but presently I'm happy with the ways things are with my GF and that is important to both of us. I hope you get to enjoy more dancing in any case Hon. :battingeyelashes::)

[Alison Lewis]

The way I'm mustering up the courage to venture out is realizing the worst case scenario is that I humiliate myself in front of strangers. Ok, I know, worst case is someone recognizes me, takes a pic, and sends it to my wife. Or that a homophobe beats me up, but I'm careful where I go.

Worst case if I tell my SO: she thinks I'm less of a man, she confides in her girlfriends who like spreading gossip, and I spend the rest of our marriage fearing that if things go downhill, she's just a phone call away from my parents or a Facebook post away from everyone else. I have a good marriage with two wonderful kids, and don't want to mess with it.

I agree that if this progresses to something I need to so more often, I have to tell her. I have no intention of going ballroom dancing again, except for possibly next Halloween when I can wear a mask.

[stacycoral]

Glad you had a good time, it is sad that we can't just go and have a good time without the world looking down on us, but being out in the world is worth it, i only wish sometimes i could be a place that it would be possible to go out more, hugs.