Could you be a mentor?

[Kate Simmons]

I was kind of thinking about this the other day. Do you think you have sufficient experience and skill in feminine appearance techniques to be able to coach, guide or teach someone else who wanted to learn?

I, personally, did most of the groundwork for myself by coming out openly, joining the Renaissance TG Org., participating in meetings and get togethers, reading several books on CDing and walking and talking like a woman. In the end I developed my own femme persona to interact with others but did adapt many suggestions by experienced CDers to my own style of doing things.

I probably could be a CD mentor but my goal would always be to instill in the other person to just be themself and not a copy of me. It would be like any kind of training really. You know you've been successful when you see someone gaining poise and confidence and developing their own skills and personality. Does anyone else feel they could help or have helped some other girl in this respect? :battingeyelashes::)

[Angela Campbell]

I am still learning but eventually I will be someones "big sister". I really started getting serious about this last summer and started from scratch. I didn't know anything about makeup, wigs, breastforms or shoes. I have learned a lot in a short time but I still have a long way to go. I will someday.

[Julie Denier]

I think this forum is great for developing mentors who can help and support the new members who join.

[Annaliese]

Yes I have help some other be more self confident in there feminine skills, but like any good teacher I learn more then my students.

[Jana]

I think I do. I mean, since I'm able to go out to mainstream places in broad daylight and pass, I believe I could mentor less experienced sisters in a few areas. I agree with you, the goal would be to provide knowledge to inspire people to seek their own answers. The old "teaching them how to fish" kinda' thing... :)

[Angela Campbell]

Give a man a fish and he knows where to go for fish
Teach a man to fish and you blow your whole marketing base.


or is it

Give a man fire and he is warm for a day
set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life...

I dunno I get confused

One thing is for sure, if you mentor someone in how to cd you will have a friend for life.

[kimdl93]

Honestly, I think I am serving as a mentor, at least to some extent, just by participating here. I wouldn't ever presume to give others advice on technique, presentation or style, but I do think I have something to offer in terms of a lifetime of experience. I've been there and done that...as they say, and sometimes I think I can help our younger members put things into proper perspective.

[AllieSF]

I agree with Kim, we are all mentors here when we opine on someone's post or respond to someone's questions. Now, I would not be a very good makeup mentor and maybe a so-so woman's mannerisms mentor. But, when it comes to just trying to live a life as issue free as possible, I think I have enough experience to be helpful to most people here. A lot of the issues discussed here are really not that much different than the everyday issues most people experience and deal with regularly, sometimes on a daily basis. That means taking the trans out and recognizing sometimes it is just a matter of common sense or ignoring someone's ignorance.

[Kate Simmons]

I agree and I've stated here many times that the foremost experts in CDing in the world are right here on this Forum. Many of us don't think of ourselves as potential mentors but when one has been out there living it and experiencing it in the real world instead of just sitting around talking about it, I guess it means we are. It mostly boils down to being practical to achieve our goals rather than being frivolous.:)

[MsRenee]

I would love to mentor anyone who would ask me for my help. I feel thats the biggest compliment I could ever get. All the time Im put forward has come full round as Im as happiest Ive been in years. I would love to pass on any info to help out the new girls.
Renee

[~Joanne~]

I was kind of thinking about this the other day. Do you think you have sufficient experience and skill in feminine appearance techniques to be able to coach, guide or teach someone else who wanted to learn?

I would love to answer this with a yes but unfortunately I will say no. While I feel I am making great strides in my confidence level, I still have so much I need to learn myself. Maybe when it finally comes all together I could but as of right now, I am pure armature and still need alot of advice just to find this side of me.

[Joanne f]

Definitely not, if there is just one thing that I have learned from being on this forum it is that I do not have the knowledge or experiences to teach anyone how to be a better feminine CD. I will leave that to you experts on the subject .

[Barbara Ella]

After many many long years of education I felt capable of educating and mentoring students for 30 years. After just one year of being a CD/transgendered/ whatever, I know how much I am lacking in knowledge, so at the present, like others have said, probably unable to actually mentor.

However, that does not mean that we inexperienced ones do not have a great deal of general wisdom to parcel out, as is obvious from the variety of threads and responses. All of these are so educational and comforting. I feel there will always be someone coming here who knows a little less than me, and may benefit from a thought or kind word, that is what we all can do every day. As has been said, together we make one hell of a mentor.

Barbara

[Diversity]

Hi Kate,
I am too new at CD'ing to offer any advice, however I think you have a good idea here, and I could see the potential for members of this forum to use this type of service, especially since the mentor would get to know the members that much better, through specific communications. I hope this idea goes forward. Good luck!
Di

[Cheryl T]

We all continue to learn or we stagnate. Being trained as a teacher and having found myself in the last few years I think I could be a mentor to someone who was not as far along in their journey.
In fact I'd love to be able to do that for someone...kinda wish I had had someone mentoring me years ago.

[Lady Panda]

I don't have much experience in being a CD ...but I am a hairdresser and beauty consultant ...taught hair school and am a hairdresser for 20 years. I try to be a positive influence when i can ...i think I can mentor on some level. But I can give support and the benefit of my years. I am a Mom and my daughter has several friends who are in the gay community and have come out to me looking for support. I am also in a relationship w a CDer. Very open minded and have mentored many young people.

[Kate Simmons]

The art of womanhood and motherhood never goes out of style. Having a successful family life is both rewarding and satisfying. I personally believe there is a great need for this for humankind to carry on, especially in this age of de-personalization and cyber life. Family values have never been more important to cultivate. One way to do this is by getting in touch with our innate femininity and cultivating our deep feelings thereby helping to re-balance culture with more important things..:)

[Kathi Lake]

I believe I could be a mentor - not necessarily for the 'womanly skills' aspects, but more for guidance and support that what you're doing isn't wrong, confidence in your presentation and abilities, etc.

Kathi

[Debglam]

I am a strong believer in "paying things forward!" When I came out the girls I met were so nice to me, so helpful! They were instant friends and I love them! Some were just wonderfully nice and some were that and role models for me too. I try and show that same kindness to the new girls that I meet and if I can offer some advice that is helpful, so be it.

[Persephone]

Maybe we should have a volunteer "Big Sister" list? And since there is a muggle organization already called "Big Sisters," maybe we'd better come up with another name.

On the list we could indicate what we are willing to do, etc. and if our SO is also willing to meet with "newbie" SO's. It would be very good to have some type of "compatibility profile" so that mentors might best be able to help folks who are likely to be heading in the same directiom.

I have mentored a few people in the past and am willing to do more, but selectively.

Hugs,
Persephone .

[Rogina B]

Pick me!! Me!! I can teach about handling challenges while out and about...Changing tires with a white blouse on and a short skirt while on a busy street,dealing with law enforcement,daintily siphoning diesel fuel in front of a Baptist Church on a Sunday morning while wearing a pink tank top that says"Legalize Gay" across the boobs! How to entertain the "boys" at the autoparts store....Let me have a student and they will never be the same!

[Beverley Sims]

Never really thought about it but I suppose I have been a mentor unwittingly on occasions.

[Lynn Marie]

I've been mentored, and also helped out by the CD's I hang out with in the NW. I'm always willing to return the favor to the girls getting started. It's just part of the CD experience for those of us who've converted our closets from a living room to a place to hang our skirts and tops.

[whowhatwhen]

Not for a long time I think, in fact if I weren't stuck in drab mode I'd love to have a mentor/someone to talk to.
All I can do is read and post here while I try to understand myself.

[JiveTurkeyOnRye]

I believe I could be a mentor - not necessarily for the 'womanly skills' aspects, but more for guidance and support that what you're doing isn't wrong, confidence in your presentation and abilities, etc.

Kathi

This is sort of how I feel. I feel like people can find a lot more useful beauty tips in magazines and on style websites but the confidence and self assurance is something all budding TG folk could probably use a hand with.

[PretzelGirl]

If someone is interested, it is something you can already do in your area. Join a group or watch the intro section here and you see plenty of people trying to look for the caring and support that to me is the key thing from a mentor. As Ryan says, you can get knowledge from SAs, magazines, and on-line resources. But a lot of people are too unsure to make those moves without someone by their side.

BTW Kathi. You have been a mentor for a long time.

[Eryn]

I have mentored a few people in the past...

For which I am very grateful!:hugs:

The fact is, one of the best people from whom to learn a task is a person who has just learned how to do the task themselves. They not only know how to do the task, but they remember how they learned to do it!

Of course, an experienced hand is also very valuable as they can add polish to the techniques learned.

Example:

I can teach anyone how to apply makeup. After all, 13-year-old girls teach each other how to do it so it shouldn't be a problem for me.

However, that doesn't mean that someone who already competent at applying their makeup can't profit from a lesson by a MAC artist.


I can teach...daintily siphoning diesel fuel in front of a Baptist Church on a Sunday morning while wearing a pink tank top that says"Legalize Gay" across the boobs!

You can't just tease us with that one! It deserves a thread of its own!

[Sue Too]

I would truly love to be a mentor to an aspiring CD who wants to experience the world as a women. I've been out in public for a number of years and think I could offer a lot of guidance to a sister. Join me and I will help you open the doors of your closet. The world is a wonderful place. Once you experience the world you will never return to your closet. Its time for you to find a friend and I'd love to be that friend. Probably the best way to set up communications is for you to PM me. If we click we can move ahead. If not.....nothing is lost.

Susan in Phoenix