First interactions out dressed?

[Nichola]

I've only been out once & never came directly into contact with anyone, but I am thinking of giving it another whirl.
So I was wondering for those of you who've been out, how did your first interactions with other people go, was it nerve racking, natural or just fun & did it boost or dent your confidence?

[Staci G]

Boosted, dented, good, and bad. I remember it to be nerve racking but exhilarating. I was so proud that I did it yet afraid I made a fool of myself. Yeah it was fan-damn-tastic. I think it makes ur want to do it again and again. Now I can't wait until I can again.

[MsRenee]

My first time out girl I thought my heart was going to beat out of my chest. was so paranoid about getting pulled over. My first interaction was at a local Tg bar to met a friend. That kinda help break the ice of being in public the first time.
Renee

[Ressie]

Went to a TG get together at a gay bar. Interaction was mostly with other CDs and it was wonderful. The nerve racking part was walking into the bar early and only a few men were there. But still no worries since it was a gay bar right? That's my only time out dressed so far.

[Bree Wagner]

I remember it to be nerve racking but exhilarating. I was so proud that I did it yet afraid I made a fool of myself. Yeah it was fan-damn-tastic.

Yep, this describes it perfectly. And all that was was checking out with a cashier!

[biggirlsarah]

I think my first time out , was to a beaumont society meet and it was in the evening and I drove , yes I was nervous but once I was on my way felt really good , I kept thinking I am not breaking any laws , I have the right to do what I am doing , when I got to the meeting I was welcomed by everyone it was a really good starting point , I have developed greatly since then , but that was about 15 years ago.
If you can dont stay in the closet it is awfully dark in there , come out into the light and be who you want to be , love and hugs Sarah xxx

[ChelseaErtel]

I was on a business trip in October and decided to be en femme the full three weeks. I took great pains to get clothing that blended in for the time of day as well as use appropriate makeup.

So, I went out. I went shopping, asked where I could try on a few tops and skirt and was directed to the ladies changing area. Asked for the restroom and directed to the ladies. Was called ma'am, and miss. Had the door opened for me several times and one older gentleman seem to follow me all over the store. He'd just be there and say hello. He was there to open the door when I entered and exited the store. It was so cute. Each step built confidence until I just didn't worry about it. I go out all the time now, to the DR, shopping,.....

Been to coffee houses and worked on my laptop, dinner, bought lingerie, and did sight seeing.

No comments, no looks - that I heard or saw. Everyone was pleasant as one would expect. I even went to a makeup counter for some new looks and the SA said I was pretty. They will do anything for a sale.

Which brings me to a point. For a first outing, go shopping. Sales establishments are there to sell - they don't give a damn about your gender, sexual persuasions, or species (they'd sell to an elephant if they had money). Great place to go. If you are going to try something on, just play ignorant and find a SA and ask where you can try on the clothes. I would bet 99 out of 100, and probably 100 our of 100 if your avatar is accurate, they'd direct you to the ladies.

When I went in to my first ladies changing area there were several GG's there. They didn't give me a second glance, just ignored me or said hello.

If you dress to blend in, you will be fine. And if they do make you, the most wonderful thing will probably happen - nothing.

Read some threads on voice training, that is the usual give away. No so much pitch but how you speak and pronounce words. I go slightly higher but talk differently. It takes practice but well worth it. If you look the part, then the voice is not a big deal if feminine enough. There are a lot of husky women out there.

Good luck and have fun.

[JenniferUK]

My first time was to the gay village in Manchester with my SO. We got an 'evening girls' from a guy. We're going out tonight to our social groups Christmas dinner. Can't wait. If you're dressed appropriate to the place then there won't be any problems, if you go to asda dressed as a streetwalker then I suspect problems would arise.

Hugs

Jen

[Kate Simmons]

There are never any guarantees one way or the other. Just go out and do it and enjoy being yourself Hon. It's your life really. :battingeyelashes::)

[Cristi]

I've been going out in public for over a decade now, but still remember the first times clearly.

For me, the nervousness and stress got highest just as I was about to step out of the car into the parking lot of a store. I almost didn't get past that point. But as soon as I did, things got easier. I was still nervous and self-conscious walking in the parking lot in plain view of all the other shoppers, but for some reason it faded pretty quickly.

For some reason, once I got in the store and realized that nobody was pointing at me and laughing.... I got a LOT more comfortable. For the record, I've been going out for over 10 years now (several times per year at least) and not ONCE have I gotten a reaction worse than a long lingering gaze and once *gasp* a 'stern look' from an older woman.

To this day, I still have a very brief moment of nerves in the moment before I step out of the car, but now it is so minor I don't even really pay attention to it.

[Jenniferathome]

My first time for interaction with the public was with two great people from this forum: Allie and Rachel. We had drinks at my downtown hotel, walked to a nearby restaurant for dinner and closed the night at a wine bar. I didn't feel nervous at all once we were going. The worst part was the elevator ride to the lobby of the hotel. It was a great experience. Go with a friend if you can.

[Ceri Anne]

My first time out girl I thought my heart was going to beat out of my chest. was so paranoid about getting pulled over. My first interaction was at a local Tg bar to met a friend. That kinda help break the ice of being in public the first time.
Renee

Very simular emotionally, but it went very well, and I ended up going out every night that week. It was such a boost and turn on, yet still was frightening exploring new teritory

[GondorRachel]

My first interaction was a coming out party that I invited 6 of my closest friends (3 of which are T* one is an SO) to meet Rachel. It was hella nerve-wracking, but as the night went on, I forgot that I was wearing a dress in front of people, and was just hanging out with friends watching movies and eating Chinese food. That doesn't make later interactions much less nerve wracking, but some. A month or so ago, right as I was escalating my coming out to include certain acquaintances, I went to a book club meeting en femme (in costume, costumes were encouraged as it was just after halloween, but nobody else bothered >.<) and everybody was either already aware of the situation or just mildly confused and then just didn't seem to care. By the end of the night, I was just me, in women's clothes (I had skipped makeup as I was in a hurry that day and I had ditched the cheap costume wig; I forgot to bring my nice wig along when I packed a change of women's clothes)... I am going to be going en femme to this group again later today, still more people to "freak out"!

[bridget thronton]

First time was scary - but nothing happened and i was treated politely.

[Vanessa5]

My first place out was to my fav thrift store. I enjoyed it tremendously. SA told me I looked beautiful (I did think she read me). Did wonders for my confidence.

[rachaelsloane]

My first time for interaction with the public was with two great people from this forum: Allie and Rachel. We had drinks at my downtown hotel, walked to a nearby restaurant for dinner and closed the night at a wine bar. I didn't feel nervous at all once we were going. The worst part was the elevator ride to the lobby of the hotel. It was a great experience. Go with a friend if you can.

Thanks Jennifer for the compliment when we went out.
Nichola,
Jen is right, try to go with a friend as it does help although my first experience was alone. Once I decided that I was going to take the first step out the door, it was to go to the annual Sacramento River City Gems "Sparkle". I also volunteered to be a greeter at the front door figuring it would help with the interaction, which it did. I drove up, checked into the hotel, only to find out that my room was not in the main building but one of the separate outer outer ones, which meant that I had to walk across the parking lot to get to the ballroom. After getting dressed and somewhat terrified, I walked out of the room and walked across. After a few minutes there, I forgot all about how nervous I had been and even forgot I was there wearing a dress, but in fact having a great time.
That was a year ago and have many experiences like the one Jennifer mentioned and today I have two I'm going to. The first is to a wine tasting luncheon with a GG I met while out with Allie at restaurant in Oakland's Jack London Square in jeans and a sweater and later to the Diablo Valley Girls annual Fall Dinner in a nice dress, etc.
From all the pictures you have posted (I hate you for how good you always look), you do have the nicely dressed aspect down so it's just it's just a matter of taking that first step.
Rachael

[Beverley Sims]

The first time I went out and interacted with others... It was fan b****y tastic. :)

[sarahgrant]

First time outside in a skirt was terrifying. Only managed short walk to end of road.

Second time just as bad but went to a shop. Noone except me seemed to care.

Now just get on with it. Haven't met any hostility. People may have doubts but its brilliant just walking around and being treated as a normal woman. Ladies toilets are still a challenge but getting more natural.

Its all down to confidence. If you look as though you belong you'll be fine. Just practice talking to as many people as you can.

[~Joanne~]

My first interaction went very well but I was at a CD friendly shop to begin with so I don't know if that counts or not. It was the first time I was fully enfemme and out shopping :) I know my mannerisms said female but my voice, while not terribly deep to begin with, said male as i didn't even try to disguise it. Saw no need too. Overall I was treated very well and had a blast :)

[Cheryl T]

Mine was nerve wracking. I kept waiting for all the negative comments and ridicule and it never came. When I had to interact with someone it was usually with a female and I waited for the axe to fall...it didn't. The worst thing was that I wanted so badly to be there and felt that I looked so horrible that I didn't belong there. Of course now I know it was all in my head and since I've been going out for about 8 years now it's just fun. I no longer dread having to speak to someone and I don't even think about something bad happening. I'm aware of my situation of course, but in the general scheme of things it's simply fun being who I am and going out.

[RenneB]

Girl.. you are way to good at the presentation to stay inside.... Nice complexion, narrow nose, nice figure, great makeup application, fashion scence.... yea, you've got to get out.

The biggest hurdle is the nerves. Myself being out and about for some time now, I remember the first baby steps and then a few more and then contact with humans...first a drive through, then the mall, then the checkout.... Take it all in a stide that you are comfortable with... and then get moving...

The first few trips will seem to last forever as time seems to stand still with the adreneline pumping.... after a while the butterflies will leave and it'll just be a nice looking young girl out doing errands and whatnot....

Renne......

[gina_edwards]

the first time i went out was to a shopping mall i was nervous as hell but as time went on it was ok and walked out full of confidence now i have no problems at all plus it helps that i dont care what ppl think its my life

[Eryn]

Every interaction brings with it a little more confidence for the next interaction. That confidence improves your presentation which makes the next interaction more likely to be pleasant for both of you. After a while you can concentrate on the reason for the interaction, not just the idea of "passing."

[Nikki A.]

My first times out were to CD weekends at a club near me. Therefore there were others like me and it was good. There was a lesbian wedding I attended with some friends and this was my first time out in public and daylight. I was very nervous before the people there (both gay and straight) were very accepting (well most were) and helped me feel at ease and be myself. The non accepting person was the loner.
My watershed moment was walking into an IHOP on a Saturday morning all dressed and ready for a day of shopping in Denver. I almost chickened out but my friend gave me the courage (also I didn't want to ruin her breakfast) to go in. After that I figured that I can do anything or go anywhere that I want and haven't looked back since.

[ArleneRaquel]

My first interaction out dressed was over forty years ago, whatever it was I'm sure that I was shaking in my boots. I believe it was getting on a late night bus, after midnight, but I'm not sure if that was the first, or just one of the firsts.

[joanna4]

It was nerve racking for sure. Its harder when I go without sunglasses. It was natural and fun like it was meant to be although I am always overdressed:P . I made me want to do it more and more. I felt like I was accepted as a GG or transsexual.

[AllieSF]

My first time out way back in 2007 was with two ladies from this site, one,Roberta, who hasn't been around in quite awhile and the other Windy Cissy with whom I go out whenever she is in town. I was nervous, maybe a bit anxious, but it never reached anywhere near the fear level. I went to the designated restaurant meeting place in San Francisco alone and got there first. So, my first interaction was with the gentleman behind the counter when I walked in. The rest of the evening is wonderful history and went off without a hitch. I even spent part of the evening chatting with the lady bartender at the bar we finally ended up at. As others have said here, it is amazing how fast any apprehensions that we have seem to fade away once we meet up with someone and get into some fun conversations.

[Amy R Lynn]

I've only been out twice now. The first time was to walk in the transgender day of rememberance, and the second was just last night to a local TG friendly bar. I have to say, it is so much more fun showing off my clothes and feminine side than it was to just walk in circles in my bedroom. I really haven't had any bad experiences. However, I've only been out twice. Once you start going, you will certainly want to do it more and more.

[AllyCDTV]

I have only been out once where I interacted with anybody. It was to a local shop specializing in crossdressers so I figured it would be a pleasant experience and it was. I dressed very conservatively, at least for me, and wore minimal makeup and fake glasses. I was sure that I would be pulled over by the police for some reason so I wanted to be able to quickly get into guy mode. Of course that never happened.:heehee:

[PretzelGirl]

First, second, third, .... they have all been good. A lot depends on what you want to pay attention to. I have turned around after interacting with someone like a SA and may see whispering, but other than one lady, that was it. The one lady? She saw me and a friend sitting at a picnic table outside a store and she just got locked into a stare with her jaw open. I just smiled and when she kept looking, I also waved. That was it.

[Angela Campbell]

I went out in public this weekend for the first time myself. I spent all day Friday and Saturday as a lady. We went to a restaurant Friday night and no one said anything or even looked at us funny. We even used the valet parking. Saturday after going out to eat for breakfast, we went shopping at a local strip mall. No one batted an eye. Other customers would say excuse me, when walking by, and some SA's were very helpful in finding the racks with my size. If anyone knew they didn't let on at all. One of my "sisters" was with me but we did not walk around together. I went on my own to shop and so did she. She told me she was watching me and other customers and did not notice anyone look at me funny or act as if something was wrong at all. I just went about my business as a woman shopping, and this during Christmas shopping time. I was dressed to blend in Jeans, a nice t shirt top that said "merry christmas", some short ankle boots, and Light on the makeup. It was truly amazing! Yes at times I was near panic but in the end it was a pleasant and uneventful experience. The only person who seemed to care was me.

[Amy R Lynn]

I just smiled and when she kept looking, I also waved. That was it.
Sue,

This made me laugh!

that is the way to do it. Own it sister! Own it. I have to imagine when you waved at her, she had to realize that she was the one making a scene. I wonder if she felt embarassed then? LOL

[rocketscientist]

Wow Nichola! It's hard to believe you've only been out once before. You are so beautiful and passable. You have everything you need to go out and enjoy yourself. Dress to blend and remember that you belong as much as anybody else does. Hold your pretty head up high and smile at everyone. Your attitude should exude confidence. The first time is usually the hardest. The nervousness and unsurety of what might happen can be unsettling. But you have to push that aside and tell yourself that this is what you are going to do and nothing is going to stop you. After you take those first steps in public and come to realize that the world is not ending and there are no hordes of angry mobs with pitchforks you will begin to relax and actually enjoy being yourself. Try your best not to get hung up on passing with everyone but just try to enjoy the experience. If any of your pictures are an indication, you WILL get a lot of attention, if not for your beauty then for your great fashion sense. When you first go into a store, you will notice that most women will look at your feet first, so as to check out your shoes(wear cute ones!). Then they will check out the rest of your outfit. When they look into your eyes,SMILE. Men are easier. Just ignore them for the most part.lol. Good luck Nichola. Take some pics for us too! Hugs,Tonya

[TeresaL]

My experience have all been positive. I'm oblivious to being read, and never had any laughing or verbal issues. I try to keep in the next octave up, and no resonance. So the voice seems to suffice. It's good for me, and it sounds like you all are having a great time too!!!

[PretzelGirl]

that is the way to do it. Own it sister! Own it. I have to imagine when you waved at her, she had to realize that she was the one making a scene. I wonder if she felt embarassed then? LOL

I think her husband was more embarrassed as she was smacking his shoulder to get his attention and he was doing his best to ignore her. But I always believe when out that eye contact and smiles are the most disarming thing. If you turn your head away, they know they have the upper hand if they want it.

[kimdl93]

My first outing was a total surprise. My wife invited a neighbor over to join us for a glass of wine on the patio...while I was dressed! I was nearly fainted...but survived with no permanent wounds ;)

[Sophia Frances]

I just went through this. The worst part was two Guys who laughed and said "dudes" as we walked by. My first internal instinct was to fight...as that is the way my fight or flight meter is programmed...but as I just kept walking one of the other girls turned and smiled...and the guys smiled back. Later in the bar I asked her how she handled it. She replied that her male self is also a fighter, but as a woman he is more polite and friendly and SHE would never think of fighting. It really turned that entire experience around for me. Taking it a step further she said that every public interaction she...and I, by proxy...have makes it easier for "the next girl" out in public. It made me want to do it again.
Other than that one experience, everyone was polite, cordial and friendly. I did think that every person who laughed within my vicinity was laughing at me...but I'm certain that wasn't the case....it was my anxiety getting the better of me.

[Jilmac]

For me it was a mixed bag of emotions, plenty of fear and angst, but after all was said and done, it turned out to be very exillarating.

[sharonlb]

My first interaction while dressed was positive. It was a Friday afternoon and I was walking toward a riverfront park. A guy walking toward me stopped me and warned me there were some troublemakers in the park. He ended up talking with me for a couple of minutes. He wasn't judgmental at all.

[Lorileah]

I don't even remember my first time anymore. Must not have been too dramatic. I have had so many other adventures since then. I guess the first time for real was when I had a makeover and we went to dinner afterwards. Really didn't hear much from anyone else but I was out with a beautiful woman :) It has never been a real worry

[Nicole Erin]

first time I ever went out dressed was like ohh, 100 years ago. Well maybe more like 15.
I was in this knee-length black dress, made up, had my hair fixed and went to the grocery store and also did laundry.

No one really seemed to react. I do remember how hard it was to get out of the car and stuff.

[Wendrme]

My first time out was in winter so I was had on a bra and a blouse but buried under a black leather jacket. I had on makeup and a brand new wig and the feeling of driving dressed was fantastic. I did what I had always wanted to do - apply my lipstick using the car mirror at a stop light with other cars around me. Wonderful! I drove to a bridal lingerie shop which I knew to be friendly to gurls like us. It felt so good to park in the lot around the corner and walk to the store. I walked in and just the manager was there. We discussed what kind of bra I wanted and it was so nice to talk to GG in this circumstance with both of us wearing lipstick and eyeshadow. She measured me and finally we found the longline braI wanted and I asked her to cut off the tags and I would wear it. She did that and I got dressed over my new bra. When I came out of the dressing room other customers had come in, a mother and teenage daughter. They were right by the counter. I had left my leather jacket by the counter, so there I was in blouse and makeup and wig, new longline bra showing thru my blouse, paying my bill and putting on my leather jacket. Luckily I had refreshed my lips in the dressing room. The manager said have a nice day, dear and the two other customers smiled at me as I left the store. I glanced back and the three of them were in conversation by the counter. Don't know if it was about me or about the teenager's bra size. I kind of like to think it was about me. Walking to the car, I have never felt more like a woman.

[KristyPa]

I went to mixed bar gay/straight the first time. Sat in the car for like a 1/2 hr before I got the nerve to go in.
No one payed any attention to me at all when I went inside. Went to the bar, sat down and ordered a drink. Stayed there for a couple hours.
I figured this out instantly, I was over dressed. I actually had on a dress. No one wears a dress to a bar. I went the next week and dressed more like the other girls.
Most will tell you this. Don't over dress and the more you go out the easier it gets. You just have to make the first step. Try driving around the first few times.

[Kelly Smith]

I've only been out once & never came directly into contact with anyone, but I am thinking of giving it another whirl.
So I was wondering for those of you who've been out, how did your first interactions with other people go, was it nerve racking, natural or just fun & did it boost or dent your confidence?

Nichola, as feminine as you look in your AV and your profile pics, you MUST go out. There is something a little bit thrilling about it that is hard to describe. My first time out was for a makeover and some shopping. It felt perfectly natural and everyone was very kind and supportive.

Be careful of your surroundings. It would be awkward to encounter a half dozen Droogs while in heels and a 38D.

Hugs, Kelly

[LaraPeterson]

Nichola, my first outing was less than five years ago, but I remember it very clearly. Everything that could rattle did; everything that could shake did; every fear that could arise did; the antiperspirant didn't work very well; the makeup ran; the ankles wobbled; I had a ball.

I had the good fortune to meet some people in another country who talked openly about transgender issues. They clearly suspected that I was more than a little interested so they encouraged me a lot. That was my beginning out into the world. They held my hands and reassured me over an over. They are still my friends and I see them about once a year.

Now I'm doing the hand-holding. . .so go on out there as you can and enjoy yourself. Just be careful to only open up to those you believe you can trust and who will not judge you for who you are.

[Loni]

it will scare the () out of you. hart about to jump out of your body, sweaty palms, dry mouth, etc.

but after you will be as if on a drug. feels so great the first time.

some knuckle dragging dopes will be slobs, but most people will just not care and if you look and act like a lady they treat you as a lady.
the teenage girls like to giggle. a new thing for them. watch out for a cam, they are everywhere. enjoy it as you can make a persons day.

you should see us gals in the sf lgbtg day parade we are the river city gems in the southern ball gowns so many want to get there photos with us. makes for a great day.

enjoy it soon it just becomes another day, just out for another chore.

aka: normal.


loni


.

[CarleyR]

I agree that the interactions seem pretty scary. I went out twice in the last year and was frightened of interactions.

On the first outing, in a busy small downtown where skirts and tops weren't out of place, I noticed in advance Internet research that one local restaurant hosted a monthly gay gathering. I figured it would be open-minded so I went there. I avoided interactions on the way, even while walking through a mall. My heart was beating fast when I walked in. The hostess looked at me, smiled, and said, 'I'll bet you'd like to sit down!'. I smiled big, and she led me to a table on the side of the room. Out and dining as a woman! How exciting! I didn't disguise my voice (or say much) while ordering, but everyone was very nice.

In another city, I decided to go to a bar with live music. But there was a necessary interaction at the outset: they needed ID. I had to speak, but the hostess ignored my voice and treated me nicely, even complimenting my bracelet (which is nice!). I actually walked back to the hotel, got my ID, returned, and presented clearly male ID, using a male voice. Nothing but smiles from the hostess. Knowing that she knew, I asked her when I left to take my photo, which she did. So I was out, I was interacting, I was known as a crossdresser.....and nothing bad happened. Thrilling!

Hey, Chelsea and Theresa, how about hints for the rest of us in how to speak when dressed as a woman?

[FaithGrace]

I went out for the first time a couple of weeks ago (I only really started crossdressing about 6 weeks ago, except for occasionally secretly trying on my ex-wife's lingerie when she was out of town). My first time out I went to Target to do some shopping for some cosmetics and beauty products. I didn't have any problems and actually had a great conversation from a ggirl in the beauty isle and she gave me some recommendations. Since then, I've been out and about several times: shopping, eating, drinking, wherever... and have never had a problem. I've received a few funny looks and think that people have murmured behind my back, but no direct confrontation.

Of course, I am a 3rd degree black belt so if any guy ever messed with me they'd have to go to work the next day and explain how they got their butt kicked by a guy in a dress!

[PretzelGirl]

Of course, I am a 3rd degree black belt so if any guy ever messed with me they'd have to go to work the next day and explain how they got their butt kicked by a guy in a dress!

That will beat mace any day of the week. Maybe I need to go out with you......

[MssHyde]

I've only been out once & never came directly into contact with anyone, but I am thinking of giving it another whirl.
So I was wondering for those of you who've been out, how did your first interactions with other people go, was it nerve racking, natural or just fun & did it boost or dent your confidence?

you would pass very easy, you look very very nice. if you go out dressed you will only want to do it more.

[Nichola]

Thanks for the nice responses & no real horror stories which is good. Hopefully I can get as brave as some of you:)

[Monica Rafaela]

I had been going out to a transgender bar. At first it was pretty uneventful. But, then I locked my keys in the car and had to call AAA for help. I was expecting the worst, a rough guy with tatoos. The tow truck driver was a middle aged asian gentleman who was surprised to see me and kept calling me by my male name on the card. Overall, no big deal. Another time I was rear ended. I have been pulled over three times, I think just for the crime of driving around late near bar closing time. I do not drink and drive under any conditions, but had to submit to the sobriety test each time. The first time I was really nervous because it was one of my first interactions with the public. I was worried in that if an officer wants to take you to jail, he can invent some charge and do it. It turned out to be ok.

[Rogina B]

My opinion as well..I will always remember the night in Chicago that I was on my way to a TG event at a nightclub and needed a phone card badly.Not thinking anything of what neighborhood I was in,I pulled into a CVS ..I found the cards at the end of the isle,and went to get into the checkout line and discovered,I'd be one of 50 people in that line! What a sight I was...short leather skirt,heels,etc[club dress] in a checkout line of "people from the old country"! Just like being on stage...but closer!! All I could do was smile and chuckle to myself that "I gave em something to talk about". Life is too short to not enjoy yourself.
There are never any guarantees one way or the other. Just go out and do it and enjoy being yourself Hon. It's your life really. :battingeyelashes::)

[Sometimes Steffi]

The first time I went out en femme, it was to the Maryland Renaisance Fair. I rented a wnech costume and changed there, so there wasn't even the thought of plausible deniability. The girls who helped me dress (cinched up my bustier) were great. The were very encouraging and kind of doted over me.

I must have been seen by tems of thousands of people at the Faire, and very few even gave me a second look. A few girls gave me a big knowing smile and a few even told me how great my outfit was. One grunk guy was totally freaked out, but his friends pulled him away before any trouble ensued.

The being said, I still have trepidation going into all girld stores like VS, Ulta, Dress Barn, either en femme or en homme. I still haven't worked up the courage for VS.

[LadyPilot]

My first fully dressed outing with my with (then girl friend) we wen to a mall in north Seattle and at dinner at Macaroni Grill and it was packed so we had to wait about 15 minutes, once inside the service was wonderful and they took my order first. I did see a little pointing and all smiles from some of the staff when I went to pay and my guy name is on the credit card which was expected. Nothing hurtful.

One time I was just a guy in a dress, black nylons and heels and my wife wanted to see Bodies exibit so we stood in line and went inside only to find out that it was also a field day for the local school district hight schools. Lots (100's) of teenager's and nothing negative happened.

Go out and enjoy! LP

[christean]

I have only gone out dressed while at and adult theater, several times which makes it easier, and a cross-dress private club. but being with others dressed as a woman was very fullfilling.

[christean]

I would be even more fullfilling to have a professional makeover and look good then go out for in public , say shopping or for dinner.

[stacycoral]

you would pass very easy, you look very very nice. if you go out dressed you will only want to do it more.

She is right, the most people i have contact with have been very kind, i had a couple laughsmiles, but in general people don't mind you being out in the crowd, Ladies some times will come and talk to you, why your dress, and general will tell you if you need something to pull it off better, but there is always that one that just has to make a scene, and Nichola like Mss Hyde said. you passvery easy, and men will think your a nature woman,hugs girlfriend.

[KatieMichelle]

My first time out dressed was this past weekend. I stopped at the gas station with my girlfriend to grab some cigarettes on our way to the bar. I was immediately outed by a gay guy inside, who loved my hair, and offered me a few makeup tips. I was slightly nervous, since I was unsure how the other customers would respond, but no one seemed to pay me any mind. After we got to the bar, a couple there, thinking we were both cis-girls, offered to buy us drinks. After talking with us for 10 minutes, they realized Katie was actually a CD, and my girlfriend was a hetero female. It was a great first time for me!

[LauraBird]

So my first "real" outing (my first actual time leaving the house was for Halloween which IMO doesn't really count), my wife and I went to a drag show in downtown Chicago. I was a terrified nervous wreck the entire car ride down, paranoid that every car we passed could "tell". When we got to the place, hopped out and walked in, the host greeted us and said, "Right this way, ladies!" THAT little statement rocked my world... and I relaxed a little. I was still pretty uptight, with my mind going a million miles an hour, and eventually my wife leaned over and told me to relax. I tried my best, eased back a little, exhaled... and enjoyed the show (forgetting I was even dressed in the first place!) I think I relaxed a little TOO much though - my wife asked one of the performers if she (he) would be willing to say hello to me personally since it was my first time out dressed, and she responded with, "NO lady sits like that!". I guess I "spread out" too much in the chair in my efforts to relax (oops). But all in all, it was a good evening.

The 2nd time out - wife and I spent the day shopping. Once I got over the initial nerves, it was totally fine - nobody even batted an eye. I purposely avoided dealing with SA's (voice would be a dead giveaway) but out and mingling in public was totally fine. We even went walking down Michigan Ave. in downtown Chicago (with LOTS of people around) and I felt as invisible as anyone. One thing I noticed - other women in department stores are so focused on the shopping before them, I think you could probably walk by in a pink dinosaur suit and no one would notice. But I think the clothing contributes, too - I wore a basic sweater dress, leggings, flats, and some light makeup that day. Go out in a leather mini and 6" heels and you're more likely to get noticed.

I did one TG specific event this past Halloween... and while I met some great people, mostly I was not impressed. It was great to be able to walk around the room freely and completely NOT worry about passing (though I believe I did look pretty good, my wife did an awesome job with my makeup)... but, without wanting to potentially offend somebody here, I'll just say that overall the majority of the crowd really wasn't my cup of tea. I think I'd prefer to go out for a night or whatever with a group of GG's, or just by myself. I think it would attract less attention.

But back to my earlier point - clothing. I've found that, as Laura evolves, I have less interest in the skimpy and strappy, and more interest in the simple and passable. My wardrobe has changed over the years to something that while still very stylish (IMO) it's also pretty conservative. I think if the clothing blends in a little bit, you won't stand out as much.

[mikiSJ]

I haven't really been "out', but earlier this month I did dress in front of a seamstress I had never met before. I did not try to be really femme or talk in a femme voice, just soft and quietly.

She was wonderful, made me feel totally at ease and even joked about my height (5'13" in heels) and how she had to reach up to measure my shoulders (she is maybe 5'4").

I doubt I will feel as comfortable when I finally do get out, and I hope the first person I meet is a kind as my seamstress.

[Ceri Anne]

I absolutly love going out dressed. I have seen a few side glances, heard some snickering, but most of my reactions ahve been very good. I'm impressed with the facination most people have when they talk to you. People I have met in bars, at retail stores, have all been great. I've been lucky I guess and never ran into someone who was cruel. Even had a cowboy come on to me once......was polite but backpeddled when he found out I was CD. Women seem to be the most curious and inquisitive. Made a lot of new friends that way.

[LaraPeterson]

My first interaction was with a male business friend. I "bumped" into him at a bar. He didn't recognize me at first, but it didn't take long. I don't know who was the most shocked. He has been a good friend for several years now and is one of the few people who know a lot about my en femme self. He made me feel quite at ease, and that helped me a lot with future meetings.

[GinaD]

My first interaction was as a teenager. I liked to walk on the beach and was doing so when I met a woman doing the same. She just walked up to me when I paused to look at the ocean and started commenting on how beautiful the scene was. I had been dressing and going out for awhile and was pretty comfortable in a bikini and coverup at the beach. I had already prepared myself to just act as natural as possible if anyone talked to me so I responded back to her as if nothing was amiss. We ended up walking the beach together that day and had a great conversation. At first, she never let on she knew I wasn't really "Diana" (at that time) until we had returned to our starting point. It was then that she warned me how unsafe it might be to walk the beach dressed as I was, as the "locals" might react negatively. She happened to own a house on that beach with her husband and invited me to come by when I was in the area. We became friends and shared quite a few walks together. She was a wonderful woman. She even gave me a few tips on how to be more "girly".

[Jamie Christopher]

Nichola:

I agree with a lot of previous posts in that you are really very pretty and won't have too much to worry about. People are going about their daily routines and you'll find you don't need to put too much stress into what they may be thinking. It is very exhilarating, almost intoxicating, to go out presenting as a woman, something I've always wanted, and now do. Like Renee said, start with a drive through, do a bit of shopping, work on softening your voice a bit for that face-to-face with a cashier. I don't pass very well, but confidence helps a lot. When face to face with a cashier that I know has read me, I just remain very pleasant and confident, and get smiles back - they can tell I'm enjoying myself, and spending money to boot! Enjoy yourself!

Jamie

[HannahF6]

My first real interaction with another person happened so fast, it was over before I knew I was into it. I was out dressed in a local park, needed a washroom so decided, as I think is right, to use the women's. As I stepped out of the washroom there was a woman arriving, she held the door for me, she gave me a polite "Hi" and continued on - it was a non event, I hadn't had time to start quaking in my shoes, I had been assessed for a fraction of a second and evidently came up female.

Hannah

[KellyM]

My first time out dressed was on a business trip. I brought a dress and wig but didn't have any makeup. I put on the dress and wig and went to the local K-Mart. No problems in the store, but as I walked out I passed 2 girls in their early teens. Right after I passed them I heard one of them say to her friend "Hey - that was a guy!". By then I was on my way to the car. I kind of chuckled to myself. But gotta wear some makeup next time. I've been shopping lots of times and never had any problems. Probably my best outing was to a museum. I wore a denim jumper, black opaque pantyhose and knee boots with about 2.5 inch heels. I felt pretty sexy about my outfit. No problems all morning walking around the museum. For lunch I went to the museum cafeteria. Just picked up what I wanted and walked thru the checkout line. I didn't even have to open my mouth. I was a little nervous about talking since I have a kind of low voice. Only talking I had to do all day was buying my ticket - just walked up and said "One" in as fem sounding voice as I could. One trip to the ladies room after lunch - no problems and touched up my lipstick. Great outing!

Kelly

[kits]

offer still stands babes, only had encounters twice, really helps to find someone you can feel comfortable with without any stress and release yourself a bit....

[aalynn88]

Seriously, you are totally hot!! You'll have no problem passing!
To answer your question, I've been going out for months now and it has been a totally positive experience!

[Cheryl T]

It was nerve wracking for sure. I was at an outlet mall with my wife and we went to the Dress Barn. While my wife went to try things on the SA tried to chat me up...asking if I was going to try anything on, if I liked the jewelry they had and so on. I didn't want to talk and make myself obvious and I see now that the SA was just trying to be helpful and get me to relax, but it was not having that effect at that moment.

Now I don't even give it a second thought and will talk to anyone. If they know, then so be it...if not, better still. No more nerves, just enjoyment.

[Stephanie47]

My first and second, and, therefore only times I ventured out with the intend of communicating with humanoids, it was Halloween. My first outing was to a Winchell's Doughnut Shop. The woman attending the counter complimented me on my look, which was totally en femme from wig and makeup to black heels. That made me feel good.

My second Halloween adventure was to a Safeway. I bought a bottle of Coke. The cashier really did not say anything. However, a guy in his twenties laughed hysterically. I had on a black dress and black heels, wig and makeup. I would not say it was disappointing, because, the guy acted like an idiot.

My recommendation would be to limit your exposure to ridicule. Go to a place that is naturally appreciative of cross dressers as they would be of the general public. In my area I have noticed on occasion small signs in the shops of a store that indicates it is gender friendly. And, one shop did offer appointments. Another resale shop interviewed in the newspaper explicitly stated it had many transgendered clients and welcomed them. Of course, there are gender friendly social activities. Go where you are appreciated.

I went back and looked at some of your postings of pictures. I think you appear to have the poise to interact with the general public. You look to be a little heavy on the five o'clock shadow, but, maybe you were just modeling the attire for us.

[Tracii G]

It was nerve wracking and fun all at the same time.
I think one of the first times I was getting a drink out of a machine at a grocery store (outside). There were 2 female employees sitting on the bench taking a smoke break.
One asked me for a light so I fished thru my purse and handed her my Bic.
She said thats a really cute purse I have one that is a darker blue I love it.
I said yeah they have lots of room in them for the size.
She looked closer and said watch for those guys over there they always try to hit on girls out here.
As I walked away her friend said gosh I think guys in drag are so cute.
I was terrified and elated all at once if thats possible.LOL. That was quite a while back and I think things are getting better for our kind.