Early Years RLE

[kristyk]

I'm 50 years now, and I'm able to understand things about my gender and how I continue to feel the woman inside of me driving to get out. However this thread is to rem anise about the days during puberty, then during high school and then after high school.
My friends were all chasing woman, I on the other hand tried dating girls then woman after high school but I was a lousy date. I had this bad habit of discussing cloths, lip stick and other female things that not many men cared about. I can still remember thinking why would anyone want to be a man I to this day can't understand that type of thinking.

I guess I want to know if others had truly bad times during they high school and after high school days. I'm speaking of those that wasn't transitioning, or seeing a therapist during this time or even out at all. My friends where ultra males I played all sports and was well liked as a male. However keeping this transgender issue under raps created for me many a circumstances that to this day some friends still have no idea what I was doing, or what they actually saw. I hope someday I can have a long discussion with them but that discussion will have to wait until the time is right.

Hopefully I'm not the only male who disliked grade school, high school and the next 5-10 years after high school all because I had no help dealing with my transgender issues.

Happy Holidays
KristyK

[kristyk]

Beth it's great to look back at those early years, and I certainly wouldn't trade them. I would however like to go back and erase some bad decisions I made with good friends now not so good friends.

I've never been one to steal, but during my grade school days and high schools days I would steal cloths from my guy friends sister's. Over the years since then it bothers me that I did that, and now that I buy my own cloths I never need to do that again. I was caught by one of the sister's in her room holding up her cloths to see how it would fit she didn't say a word I apologized and left. She's now married and I know her husband, he makes a point to drop insinuations about people that cross dress every time I'm around him. I have always watched my back around him, but if he knows how many other friends of mine know. Maybe I more out than I think LOL

KristyK

Happy Holiday's to you

[danielleinbr]

The type of home and neighborhood I grew up in I learned quickly to hide my fem side. Self preservation I guess,lol. I didnt understand anything I was feeling anyway,I just thought I was really messed up in the head. Things like why do I like dresses, why do I want to kiss that guy, what is wrong with me, etc. Grade school and High School really stunk from that perspective. I was never really picked on, but then I hid things exceptionally well. When I went away to college it was like being let out of prison, lol. I was free to go out dressed, date guys, etc. But I was still a guy in class and most other activities. I learned then to be happy with who I am. I am still a guy most of the time even though I would like to be otherwise, but I am practical also. Maybe one day I will transistion, but for right now I am happy with who I am.