Is there a correlation between the urge to dress and stress?

[Allison Chaynes]

A lot of negative stuff has been happening lately to and around me (car, house, work, kid, spouse issues) and it seems like the desire to be the feminine version of myself is stronger each day I am under added stress. Is there any actually correlation between stress and increased desire to CD?

[AlanaG]

Yes I believe that there is, at least for me. If I have a stressful day at work or something else causing stress it makes me want to dress all that much more.

[Kelley]

I have thought about this recently and had an idea that it may be a form of escape. I was thinking that when I am dressed and fell more feminin I don't have to be the one that has to protect everyone else,no one will look to me to take care of them, someone else will protect me. It was just a thought.

[connie23]

Girls,
This is a great question. Nothing takes my mind off of a stressful day like dressing. It transports me to a whole new place, both exciting and relaxing. As I age, more relaxing and les exciting.
What a wonderful solution. I am thankful I have this relief.
Connie

[Allison Chaynes]

Glad I am not the only one! Kelley, your words are my exact thoughts right now.

[Debglam]

It probably does but I'll add that maybe it is the reverse. When I get out and get a chance to be myself, I feel terrific! The other things causing stress seem less "stressful" after a day out!

[bcpmax]

Yes, for me there is. With college application deadlines fast approaching, I've been wearing my bra far more often then usual. It's comforting and calms me down.

[Annette Anderson]

This simple fact took me years to see a connection.I just thought i was in a "weird" mood preceding to giving into the overwelming desire.I have always been a high strung person.Maby living in New Jersey all these years has made me this way,or i once heard someone say "blonds are hotheads". I'm a natural blonde(yeah as a guy).maby this is true ,i don't know.But one thing i do remember is about 2 years ago having alot of stress at work,the desires were just taking me over,i was dressing every free second that i had.But i also think depressed moods bring it on too.

[sissystephanie]

I would say that if there is a correlation between the urge to dress and stress in anyone's life there is another problem involved. I have been dressing longer than many of you have been alive, and do not remember ever having dressed or not dressed because of stress! And believe me, I have had a stressful life. But my femme life and my drab life are 2 separate things. I have never let them affect each other. I do love to be dressed enfemme!!

[Annette Anderson]

And believe me, I have had a stressful life. I do love to be dressed enfemme!!

Wait a minute,what?

[Michaelasfun]

For me, there is. Not just to de-stress, but it provides a getaway from anything else negative going on in my life. It's like opening an unread book that is fresh and full of possibilities. The first time I ever went out driving as Michaela, I was full of exuberance, the likes of which I hadn't experienced in a long time. So for me it represents not only escape, but happiness, and the more so the better I can make myself look.

[Tara D. Rose]

Yes, I not only think so, I know that it is so true that the more stressed you are, the more the desire to become our other side increases. But if other stresses prevent us from doing this, then more stress is added. Thus the stronger the urge to dress, a ying yang cycle.

[ClosetED]

I also strongly believe that dressing is done, for many hetero CDs, to relieve stress. It may not be as clear to those who want to be women. But here is the next question - why do we relieve stress this way rather than other ways? Genetics, environment, self-esteem issues, parents, sibling order, etc? Why not buy a sports car, fishing boat, hang out in a bar with friends? Do we have fewer friends than others? Love to hear some thoughts.
And since another thread commented on campiness, Hugs to all! xx

[Jan Michell Collins]

Hey Tara
I think the stress thing is true. I know when I have a bad day at work I feel so much better after some Jan time. My alter ego calms me down when she can express her self.

[MsJanessa]

yes, dressing is a real stress reliever for me and I'm sure for most of us here

[Shadeauxmarie]

For me, my desire for dressing up is always highest when I am stressed.

[Maia C]

Definitely a link! Our minds are already working overtime to keep those feminine urges in the subconscious. When we're under stress that energy is needed elsewhere.

[laura.lapinski]

For me it is. I noticed this a few years ago. I think I've figured a lot of things out and am OK with them.

[AllyCDTV]

I have gone through a few periods of crossdressing and a time of high stress preceded the start of each period. My latest period, which has lasted about 5 years was preceded by perhaps the most stressful time in my life. While the things that were causing the stress have passed, I have found that crossdressing gives me a chance to take enjoyable little vacations for a few hours. Relief from stress is no longer the motivator for me crossdressing and has been replaced by a more positive motivation, pleasure.

[heatherdress]

I do enjoy crossdressing and also recognize it is a stress reducer for me.

[Joanie_Shakti]

For me, yes. I've been dressing for a good forty years or so, but it was just occasionally until about four years ago when the economy started to tank, the banks went on a frenzy before the new credit card laws took effect, and there were major changes at work.

One of my theories about myself is because I don't have a wife or girlfriend to discuss things and have physical contact with, dressing is a substitute. The feel of a bra around my chest may be a substitute for a hug. I seem to have sensitive skin and the feel of the finer fabrics women wear against my skin, or a skirt brushing against my legs has a soothing effect on me.

I realize that women have problems too. And there are things I wouldn't want to put up with, menstruation, pregnancy, etc. But fantasizing about being female means I don't have to be stoic and macho, and I can escape the "manly" things that I feel I have failed at in life.

[Missy]

When in stress wear a dress

[Annette Anderson]

Here's a strange thought.Is it just the suppression of the feminine that causes the stress or compounds an outside stress.Because "guy mode" for me is always the one who burdens the stress.The stressor was still there after i would dress,but i just looked at it different and had a feeling "it will all work out"

[sometimes_miss]

A lot of negative stuff has been happening lately to and around me (car, house, work, kid, spouse issues) and it seems like the desire to be the feminine version of myself is stronger each day I am under added stress. Is there any actually correlation between stress and increased desire to CD?

Sure. Holding back the urge to dress up, causes stress. Which makes it difficult to hold back the urge to dress, and the cycle feeds upon itself until I give way, and dress up. Rather than go through that, I dress as a girl pretty much all the time when I'm at home. Makes the off time a little easier.

[Carrie R]

More stress makes me not want to crossdress, I'd rather take a long hot bath or try to get some sleep.

[Rebecca W.]

For me, there is. Not just to de-stress, but it provides a getaway from anything else negative going on in my life. It's like opening an unread book that is fresh and full of possibilities. The first time I ever went out driving as Michaela, I was full of exuberance, the likes of which I hadn't experienced in a long time. So for me it represents not only escape, but happiness, and the more so the better I can make myself look.

Michaela,
I too have had similar emotions when dressed as a woman. It is hard to describe sometimes but you have said it perfectly! My first drive home dressed as a woman was an experience that not only relieved all of the years of stress just thinking about it, but it also signaled a turning point in my dressing forever. I am never stressed out when I am dressed as a woman, only when I am not.

[Angela Campbell]

For me dressing causes stress. Probably from a lifetime fear of getting caught. I still do it every day but it is stressful to me.

[Angela Campbell]

But fantasizing about being female means I don't have to be stoic and macho, and I can escape the "manly" things that I feel I have failed at in life.

Joanie, I used to feel that way. Like I failed at being a man. Now I realize I was pretty good at pretending to be a man all those years. I wasn't much of a man in many ways but I fooled the whole world into thinking I was one.

[stephNE]

Without question, when I dress in femme, I have much less stress. I'm sure they are related. It might be a form of temporary escape.

[Jess1982]

I don't believe stress is why we do this. It does, however relieve stress. For me at times suppressing my desires to dress is somewhat stressful in it of itself.

[Shdow_dragoness]

Psychologists have proven that for some there is a correlation between stress and your everyday cross dresser.Now for me I do get the urge to do so when stressed as it relieves it and I can go about my day. Of coarse there are times when I dress, I gain not only focus but the energy and drive to do the things that stress me out such as getting groceries, picking up the kids, paying the bills, etc. It seems the benefits outweigh the cons of the situation.

[PretzelGirl]

I believe that stress is something that takes us at a singular moment due to events and then after that, it is up to us whether it still affects us. Doing healthy things helps alleviate stress. So is is natural for many to dress to help cope with what is bothering you. If so, that is a good thing as once you can get the stress under control, you can then work on dealing with the source. So who says crossdressing isn't healthy? :battingeyelashes:

[Kate Simmons]

I guess in some cases but it is most likely based on fantasizing as escapism than it is fact. The truth is it's way more difficult to be a woman than many think. To fulfill that role takes a lot of effort and moxie. Not many guys can do it. This is one of the real reasons we love and admire women so much.:battingeyelashes::)

[Nichola]

I think it's completely down to the individual & depends on the type of stress or situation involved. One thing that does seem common though, is that it does provide stress relief & a sense of happiness which can only be a good thing.

[Beverley Sims]

Dressing when stressed is certainly a form of release.

[Allison Chaynes]

When in stress wear a dress


I love this quote!

[Stephanie47]

Yes, for me there is. With college application deadlines fast approaching, I've been wearing my bra far more often then usual. It's comforting and calms me down.

You made an image of Linus and his blanket pop into my mind!

I find being totally en femme has become a great stress reliever, therapeutic in fact. I seem to make a mental transition from my male dominated self my inner feminine self. Primarily it does relieve the mental stresses related to combat experiences of forty plus years ago.

[Lacy PJs]

I asked a similar question about this a while ago. Yes, I feel that dressing has been a relief to stress for me as I look back on my life. When I lost my job, when I lost a loved one or when other things seemed to bear down on me, that's when getting dressed and getting dressed more frequently seemed to serve as a real stress reliever.

I might also add that sometimes going out and getting something "fun" (my term for buying something for dressing) also seems to be a stress relief. Guess you might say that when the going gets touch, I (sometimes) go shopping!

Lacy PJs

[Jessica Keys]

I have thought about this recently and had an idea that it may be a form of escape. I was thinking that when I am dressed and fell more feminin I don't have to be the one that has to protect everyone else,no one will look to me to take care of them, someone else will protect me. It was just a thought.
Yes, my thoughts exactly Kelly.
Also, I have always thought...how can I say this??? When we are "horny".
Yep!
Jess

[Allison Chaynes]

I am glad I am not the only one who employs "retail therapy" as a stress reliever. Based on my excessive warddrobe, I must be super stressed :)

[Lynn Marie]

Is there a correlation between the urge to dress and stress?

Nope, not for me. I avoid stress like the plague. I've already had a heart attack, and not all that interested in having another. I just dress because I like to. It's fun!

[Jaymees22]

Yes, When I'm dressed all my stress goes away and most of the time I didn't realize how stressed I was. It just drains out of me like magic! Hugs Jaymee

[Melissa_59]

Dressing will relieve stress many times, but it doesn't drive me to dress.

~Linebacker Melissa

[Rhonda Ann]

I agree, I strongly believe there is a connection. I don't think stress is the only thing that correlates with dressing. Any negative thing in life can increase the desire. Depression is another biggie, when I get depressed, I just want to go home and dress up. I agree with Kelley, I believe it is a form of escape.

[NicoleScott]

Stress relief can be a by-product of dressing, but certainly not a driver.

"Doc, I'm stressed. What to do?"
"Fishing?" "Hate it."
"Woodworking?" "All thumbs, and want to keep them."
"Golf?" "Can't afford it."
"Crossdressing?" "Hmmmmmm......."

"Honey, you'll never guess what the doctor ordered for relieving my stress ."

[Amy07]

I do the shopping first, then get dressed! Double stress relief for me!

[Laura28]

I find when ever i am under a lot of stress i have the desire to dress even more then normal. When i am dressed or painting my toes it is so relaxing.

[Allison Chaynes]

Stress relief can be a by-product of dressing, but certainly not a driver.

"Doc, I'm stressed. What to do?"
"Fishing?" "Hate it."
"Woodworking?" "All thumbs, and want to keep them."
"Golf?" "Can't afford it."
"Crossdressing?" "Hmmmmmm......."

"Honey, you'll never guess what the doctor ordered for relieving my stress ."

I tried this route with my wife after I started seeing a therapist... she laughed.

[kymmieLorain]

I believe I have had the same thing happen when I was wound up or stressed. All I could think of is how nice it would be to go home and slip into something soft and feminine.

Kymmie

[amia909]

i will agree i have found my self more relaxed when i get a chance to dress im able to focus and get some of my work done

[Jenniferathome]

There is no question there is a direct link. Even the rare cross dresser studies validate that point but anecdotal evidence presented here in numerous posts supports that theory. I'll add that in addition to stress, the loss of ability to dress, greatly increases the desire to dress. For those of us with kids in college, we feel that every summer and school break.

[NicoleScott]

But what is that link? Is it a correlation, or is it cause and effect? If stress causes crossdressing, why doesn't it cause everyone who is stressed to crossdress? Maybe stress prompts crossdressers to dress, and that dressing relieves their stress, but stress doesn't seem to have the ability to cause non-crossdressers to dress.

[Jenniferathome]

But what is that link? Is it a correlation, or is it cause and efect? If stress causes crossdressing, why doesn't it cause everyone who is stressed to crossdress? Maybe stress prompts crossdressers to dress, and that dressing relieves their stress, but stress doesn't seem to have the ability to cause non-crossdressers to dress.

Naturally, you must have the cross dressing gene to be affected. Achoholics want a drink when stressed more than when not. Same for smoking. Perhaps kleptomania is the same, ....

[Danielle tights]

I absolutely think there is a link between stress and dressing, the opertunity to become someone else for a time and escape for a while is in every human beings sub concious mind, whether it is dressing as a girl or indulging in a hobby like re-enactment (civil war or medievel etc). The promblem comes when the need to escape becomes stronger than the opertunity to do so leading to even more stress.

[Kate's at home]

I typically can't wait to get home from work and change...leave the day and it's stress behind...and on weekends I'm dressed most of the time. When dressed, I feel much more like who I really am. A kind of existential relief...

[CassandraSmith]

That theory has been around for a while. I first heard of it on Dr. Toni Grant's psychological counseling/advice syndicated radio show. I think there's some truth in it as I definitely find a much quieter place mentally when dressed. I don't think I totally understand why I dress though and in some ways, I'm thinking that leaving it a mystery is OK.

[gennee]

I love that! Couldn't have said it any better.

[gennee]

When I started out, if I went a week without dressing I would go nuts. I made up any excuse to go out and be Gennee.
All the stress disappeared.

:)

[NicoleScott]

It seems that stress causes people to do things that are comforting to them. For crossdressers, it's crossdressing. For others, it's whatever is comforting for them.

[Allison Chaynes]

I lost my job last week. Visited the therapist today and asked her if it was normal to want to dress more. Her answer was that anything we find comfort in tends to create a stronger urge when we are under a lot of stress. Thank God I quit drinking...

[NathalieX66]

In my eyes, ABSOLUTELY!

Absolutely.

Let's begin with the fact that I was a closet crossdresser since the age of 7. I loved diving into my older sister's clothes when she or my parents were not around. I wanted to be what girls are.
OK, that.

I spent many years being a closet crossdresser, even from high school, college, and my career. One day I got fired from a job (nothing to do with CD'ing) , and when I landed a new job I vowed to get straightened out, and I thought "eliminating my crossdressing" was one of them. ......didn't work.

I landed a decent job, then the stock market crash of October 2008 hit. My company laid off many people but they kept me on but I took a pay cut as everyone in the company did. I also had lots of credit card debt. I survived, but going back into CD'ing helped me cope with the adversity.

Now I'm an "out an about" transgender person, probably with no interest in transitioning to female permanently, but certainly with big permanent hair removal bills, and walking in public wearing dresses. Life is great!

Got questions? PM me.

[Jenni Yumiko]

I have thought about this recently and had an idea that it may be a form of escape. I was thinking that when I am dressed and fell more feminin I don't have to be the one that has to protect everyone else,no one will look to me to take care of them, someone else will protect me. It was just a thought.

This hits home for me