dress up to children is bad?

[missmars]

If we crossdress our children or infant or kids younger brother is bad?

It can make him crossdresser.

[Kate Simmons]

I don't think it "makes" anyone to be anything. We are who we are. I think the main concern would be with regard to confusion of children as to who we are fulfilling a role and how it would affect their position in a family.

[Jenniferathome]

No. No one can "make" across dresser. You must be a cross dresser to want to dress.

[Annaliese]

No, if they become crossdresser it is because that is how they are and would have become one if you did not dress them.

[Beverley Sims]

Playing dress up only strengthens the urge that would already be there.
If there is no urge in the first place it is likely to be just another adventure playtime.

[Kimberly Renee]

Not sure of the meaning of your question. Is it if we crossdress in front of children or is it putting a dress on your son?

I'm reminded of an incident when I was a child of 5 or 6 (?). During an overnight visit to grandma that included going to church Sunday morning, it was discovered that I didn't a have a pair of clean underwear. I don't remember if it was because there wasn't one packed in my suitcase or if I had soiled them somehow.

Anywho, it was decided that I would have to wear a pair of my younger sister's panties. I really don't know why my parents thought this would be more appropriate than going commando (this was in the 70's). I do remember that it took both mom & dad to hold me up in the air while grandma slid the panties up my legs while I was kicking and crying. They just kept reassuring me that no one would know. I don't recall being teased by my siblings so they must have kept it a secret, but I pouted all during the service.

Now, in no way do I relate this experience with my desires to crossdress, but I suppose it could be debated either way.

[Foxglove]

I remember when I was a kid, my sister put a dress on my younger brother and then took him around to introduce him to the neighbors. She never put a dress on me. I'm trans. My brother isn't (as far as I know). So the moral is: if you don't want somebody to be a CDer, dress him up when young. Failure to do so can lead to disaster.

[Stephanie47]

It use to be a custom to dress little boys in the same attire as girls. That was societal custom and normal. It would seem most boys made the transition to wearing manly clothing without becoming cross dressers. I suspect, if a child is dressed en femme by play mates or adults, and, there is some affection associated with it, then maybe it will take him down the road to cross dressing.

What if you're babysat by an aunt, and, the female cousins will only allow you to play with them while dressed as a girl?

What if your mother keep stressing she wanted a daughter instead of a son? Would the son be more prone to cross dress? Or would he hate/dislike this mother?

I suspect many cross dressers keep a good number of shrinks employed.

[Barbara Ella]

I do not believe either of these scenarios is bad, either dressing in front of your children, or dressing your children in opposite gender clothing. I do not think it is wise to dress them, however, if only for one reason. Depending on their outlook, they will remember you dressing them, and thank you, or they will remember and hate you because you are the reason their life has not turned out the way they wanted. Let children advance at their own pace, just do not discourage them as they make their choices, and encourage them at all times with positive thoughts.

Barbara

[Amanda M]

I think, Missmars, that before I offer any opinion, I would like to know why you want to do this, and how old are the children? Also, what is the significance of crossdressing in your culture? Can you tell us more?
Amanda.

[Angela Campbell]

I would think it is best to let the children live as they are and if they decide to crossdress then support them, but I wouldn't make the decision for them or push them towards it. It is the individuals choice to make, even a child. I can remember my Mother telling me I could be anything I wanted to be, I wanted to be a girl and she said well, except for that you can be anything you want to be.

[Aylineira]

No, dressing in front of children will not make them into a crossdresser. Just like if you play the piano everyday for your child; it won't make him want to play the piano later in life. The choice is always theirs to make.

[Joanne f]

Not quite sure which way you mean this so if I get it wrong I apologise,
If you cross dress a child that is to young to understand what you are doing then yes I agree that would be wrong , if you cross dress in front of your children then I think that can only help them to understand that there are all types in this world and if they did grow up to be a cross dresser then you are there to support them but what ever happens I do not think that you can turn someone into a cross dresser it has to be within them to start with or they have to have an open mind to maybe try it just to see what it is like to have a dressing freedom of choice.

[BillieJoEllen]

I would on ocassion have to wear my older sister's panties and Ts when my boy undies were in the wash. On ocassion I would also be given some of her socks to wear. When I was older I was often used as a 'dress model' for a girl cousin. My mother often had me wear 'everything' that a girl would wear underneath. Out on the farm when I was about 9 or 10 I got my clothes dirty while at a party for my cousin. My aunt dressed me up in her daughter's clothes. This included underwear and a dress. It was very embarrassing and humiliating. But when I think of these things I can't make a link to when I actually did become a CDer. That was a totally unique situation. So, I don't believe with the experiences of what I had gone through that any of that actually made me a CDer.

[litangel]

The key to having healthy children who have a sense of choice, is before they are old enough to want to choose, dress them different ways, all over the gender spectrum, but without any fanfare. Just let it me ho hum, assume people can wear what they want. And then when they are old enough give them complete freedom and support them. I want to trust a child's soul, and follow where it leads, without any pressure or shame.

[missmars]

Today lgbt is not discriminated,but no parent choice there non-lgbt children to lgbt.

I dont decide about making crossdresser(If it is possible) is bad or good.

[Angela Campbell]

The key to having healthy children who have a sense of choice, is before they are old enough to want to choose, dress them different ways, all over the gender spectrum, but without any fanfare. Just let it me ho hum, assume people can wear what they want. And then when they are old enough give them complete freedom and support them. I want to trust a child's soul, and follow where it leads, without any pressure or shame.

I would be afraid to do this. Other children would be merciless and I would fear that this would bring on emmense shame from his pears.

[missmars]

Put dress to son.

[Keri L]

I am not sure that this thread is about dressing in front of or dressing your childre. But, I have been thinking a great deal lately about whether and when to tell my children about Cate. Right now, my daughter is 4 and my son is 2.

Can anyone offer any personal experiences on this issue or any good books on the subject? I want to be honest with my children, I suspect they may find out eventually no matter what, but I do not want to cause them any unnecessary dismay. In addition, I am worried that children this young cannot keep a secret, and I do not want them to suffer ridicule, if they let the cat out of the bag.

I appreciate any thoughts.

Warm regards,
Cate

[Jenniferathome]

Put dress to son.

Children should be allowed to play dress up. That means boys and girls in the 3 to 6 year old range will freely put on the other sexes clothing without shame. This is NOT cross dressing,it is playing. If you force your child into clothing for the opposite sex,they will not have fun.

Regardless, there is no scenario where one can make a cross dresser. None. In exactly the same way, you can not make a straight person a homosexual. It's genetic,not socialization.

[Kathleen Ann Trees]

I played dress up with the neighbor girls when I was 4 or 5 and I LOVED IT! Ever since I've longed to wear girls clothes. I have no idea if that play time was the catalyst for what would ultimately be.

Kathleen Ann

[JenniferR771]

Crossdressing and homosexuality are likely inborn, but not genetic, otherwise twins would be the same. Crossdressing or gender-unusual is more like being born left-handed. Hands and body looks the same, but something in the brain is different. Brain-sex variation.

It appears my crossdressing had no effect on my two brothers.

It is rare for sons of crossdressers to be crossdressers, judging by comments on this forum.

[WIFE GG/SO]

It is rare for sons of crossdressers to be crossdressers, judging by comments on this forum.

My husband is a CD'er. We've recently found out that his adult son is also a CD'er. I was really surprised by this. His son has never seen him CD'ed, but his son did know about his CD'ing. My psychologist tells me that there is good evidence that CD'ers are born that way. She doesn't believe it is a learned behavior, but an inborn behavior. But nobody knows for sure I guess.

Di

[CassandraSmith]

Only my opinion; I have no science or other experience than myself...

I suspect that it doesn't do anything. The need to do this comes from within not without and seems to be tied to the ability to fully relax but it's still kind of mysterious to me after all these years.

[Diversity]

I cannot answer this with any degree of knowledge. What I can say is that it is actually healthy for young children to play and experiment with dressing up in all kinds of clothes. To them, it is all in fun. Let them play. Repressing their emotional desire to play with clothes of which are typically worn by the opposite sex can lead to anxiety. Let them play and enjoy their time. It does not mean they will become CD, TG, etc. They will take their freedom and choose their own paths.
Di

[Aylineira]

To Caitlyn Powers: With your children, you can never know if or when your child will "out" you. From what I have studied and understood on this matter is that if you are a closet CDer you should speak to your children about keeping the privacy at home. Meaning that family matters should not be discussed with anybody outside of the home. This way it covers all matters private such as financial to arguments with the spouse to something as minor as "Daddy is wearing a dress".

There's nothing you can ever do or say that will make the child not say anything 100%. I know some people in this forum says that they did not want any ridicule to fall upon their children because of crossdressing and therefore kept it from them. However, this is something that you will have to figure out based on your child's personality and how much they can actually keep matters to themselves.

Now to keep in vein with the OP: Sorry I misunderstood the OP. No, making any child dress up will also not make them into a crossdresser. I know of a guy who grew up having to wear many of his sister's things growing up to the point where people thought he was a girl until he was 10. He says he's not a crossdresser but is open to people who are because of the experience.

[Keri L]

Thanks, Aylineira, I think I have at least a couple of years to learn their personalities and to read up on ways to present it to them.

Best,
Cate

[Jennifer in CO]

Our oldest daughter has no memories of being raised by "2 Mommies" when she was small. I didn't come back to the dark side (full time) till she was almost 4. Through round-a-bout questions about her earliest memories, she has said numerous times the earliest recollections are of events when she was 5 or 6 so my thought is your pretty safe up till somewhere in that age range. Later in life is a different story. Youngest was 3 and the oldest 10 when I had "lower end" surgery that made wearing pants a toss-up between painful and not possible. So, for close to 3 months I wore only skirts (usually ankle-length) or very loose fitting "harem pants". While she never really said anything, the oldest didn't bring any friends around for quite a while...

As far as dressing a child (on purpose), I would ask your motives before making a comment. Meaning, are you dressing the child because there are no clean clothes at the moment, the child shows a desire to associate with the opposite gender of its birth, or for your own jollies?


Jenn

[Ninotchka]

My daughters saw me in dresses all their lives. They grew up thinking it was normal for their father to wear dresses at home.
I never had a clue whether they told their friends or not. I was always treated with respect by them.
I think openness is the best policy.