Lorileah
01-01-2013, 11:20 PM
OK, let the vegging out begin.
There is a term called "sub drop" that some here may know. In a way I think we have the same thing in the TG community. At least it seems similar. Where you are riding high then suddenly you are like Wile E Coyote looking down at the canyon floor.
*looks down, holds up sign "oh oh" sound of bomb dropping and the puff of dust*
Seems for the last three months I have been going non-stop. I did this because I didn't really want to have time to think and ponder. But that has a way of catching up with you no matter what. I am in the midst of what everyone here knows where I am questioning why I am what I am and why I keep doing it.
I have been riding the wave. I have been having a great time. I fell into the same trap I was in when I was in high school. I was working really hard to be a cool kid I didn't pay attention to my real friends. So that is the warning here, know when you are being schmoozed and used as a stepping stone by people who have their own agenda. Lesson for the day :)
New Year's eve. Wow. Several weeks ago I was told I had been volunteered to tend bar at the "club" (as the male me). Being the nice guy I am and also because I can't say "no". I agreed.
The weekend before Christmas, we had a sort of "welcome home party" for one of our members who has been working with FEMA in NYC for the last month. He got a 6 day vacation and now he is back there. Since it was a Friday night I went as Lori ( I am not wasting weekends :) And this way if the party got dull I could go somewhere else). This group knows me and accepts me so it wasn't a surprise at all. But as time went on (and I stayed the whole evening) they started joking that Lori should be the one tending bar. There were remarks about how I would get more tips and how more people would hang out that the bar. One woman said she didn't think I could do it in heels all night (hang in there). One told me to wear a short skirt and I would sell more top shelf drinks.
Well, I didn't back down. I told them I would do it. :facepalm: I really wanted to do it as I am working on being "me" as full time as I can.
So last night was the party. I dressed as I usually do, nice LBD, hose (ok not as I usually do because I don't like hose) and my 3" pumps. The matting behind the bar is rubber with 1" holes in it. My worry was constantly stepping in the hole. It was not an issue. I was totally comfortable working the bar. I had to keep putting my reading glasses on though because I didn't have the keys on the register memorized. Amazingly my legs and feet held up well. No more tired than if I had worn flats. (One thing here though, buy good shoes. If you buy leather and make sure they fit, you can go all night. You buy cheap or plastic..well nuther whole story on that). I did have two pairs of shoes as back up.
One of the patrons over indulged a bit and it was obvious he could not drive home. My co-bar tender called a cab (free rides home NYE if you drink too much) but it would be an hour wait. I watched as he swayed and weaved in his bar stool and decided I should hold him up. Here is where the whole heel thing went terribly wrong.
First he was in a bar tools and i just made sure he didn't crash to the floor. But I had a job to do as I could not just stand there all night. I tried to keep an eye on him as I worked the bar but somehow I got distracted. A patron came up and asked me if I knew the guy who was drinking had left the bar. I looked up and he was GONE:eek:. I rushed from behind the bar and found him staggering toward the back door. With the help of another man we stopped him. He was not willing to have us keep him there and he fought with us (not punch throwing but more wrestling). There I was, trying to hold this man from falling to the floor and stop him from leaving, on a slick tile floor in 3" heels. We did our little dance (believe me a drunk person has strength you don't realize) and he pinched my arm, pulled the material on my dress and twisted and turned. Finally he was sinking and the two of us could not hold him up so my compadre grabbed a chair and we lowered him down.
It was cold here last night and the hallway was not well sealed from the back door draft. That's when I felt the chill. :eek: I kept one hand on the man and reached back; my dress was above my hips. He had somehow pulled the hem up and it stayed there. I was standing in the hallway in my underwear and thigh highs exposed to anyone who came by. As quickly as I could I rearranged myself to some semblance of decency. I left my helper here holding our friend as I went to check on the bar business. it was under control so I went back. By this time the inebriated guy, was flashing back to his days in Nam and reliving an ambush he had gone through over 40 years ago. It took three of us to hold him down and with the help of our club chaplain who talked him down, we got it under control .
This is where I broke down though. I was emotionally exhausted and I started to cry (both from the physical and from the empathy over his days in the military). Then I realized that all the physical stuff on the hard tile floor had made my legs and feet start to hurt. I was worn out. It wasn't the bartending but it was something I never expected, that I would be involved in a physical matter. My first worry? What was my eyeliner going to look like. It was waterproof I guess because when I got to the mirror it had not run and even my hair was in place. One patron told me I looked I had just finished a good date.:rolleyes:. (OK that was not a direct quote but I can't print what he REALLY said)
It was time for the midnight toast and I waited until that was over to change shoes to my 2" Mary Janes with a bigger heel, but the holes in the mat were exactly the same dimension as the heel. Evey step I took I stuck in the mat. So I did break down and put on flats. 6 1/2 hours on my feet in the stilettos though. Not bad I think.
I had many compliments about my look. Everyone treated me like how I was dressed (some still have trouble getting used to calling me Lori or using feminine pronouns but they are trying. I am a Chica not a hombre). Yes I can Bunny Dip.
Our friend who had too many? He refused the cab and no one knows where he went (we could not force him and by the time we could get detox he was gone), but while waiting for the cab he asked me out three times. I am not sure but I hope he does not remember me accepting his date Saturday night:nailbiting:
There is a term called "sub drop" that some here may know. In a way I think we have the same thing in the TG community. At least it seems similar. Where you are riding high then suddenly you are like Wile E Coyote looking down at the canyon floor.
*looks down, holds up sign "oh oh" sound of bomb dropping and the puff of dust*
Seems for the last three months I have been going non-stop. I did this because I didn't really want to have time to think and ponder. But that has a way of catching up with you no matter what. I am in the midst of what everyone here knows where I am questioning why I am what I am and why I keep doing it.
I have been riding the wave. I have been having a great time. I fell into the same trap I was in when I was in high school. I was working really hard to be a cool kid I didn't pay attention to my real friends. So that is the warning here, know when you are being schmoozed and used as a stepping stone by people who have their own agenda. Lesson for the day :)
New Year's eve. Wow. Several weeks ago I was told I had been volunteered to tend bar at the "club" (as the male me). Being the nice guy I am and also because I can't say "no". I agreed.
The weekend before Christmas, we had a sort of "welcome home party" for one of our members who has been working with FEMA in NYC for the last month. He got a 6 day vacation and now he is back there. Since it was a Friday night I went as Lori ( I am not wasting weekends :) And this way if the party got dull I could go somewhere else). This group knows me and accepts me so it wasn't a surprise at all. But as time went on (and I stayed the whole evening) they started joking that Lori should be the one tending bar. There were remarks about how I would get more tips and how more people would hang out that the bar. One woman said she didn't think I could do it in heels all night (hang in there). One told me to wear a short skirt and I would sell more top shelf drinks.
Well, I didn't back down. I told them I would do it. :facepalm: I really wanted to do it as I am working on being "me" as full time as I can.
So last night was the party. I dressed as I usually do, nice LBD, hose (ok not as I usually do because I don't like hose) and my 3" pumps. The matting behind the bar is rubber with 1" holes in it. My worry was constantly stepping in the hole. It was not an issue. I was totally comfortable working the bar. I had to keep putting my reading glasses on though because I didn't have the keys on the register memorized. Amazingly my legs and feet held up well. No more tired than if I had worn flats. (One thing here though, buy good shoes. If you buy leather and make sure they fit, you can go all night. You buy cheap or plastic..well nuther whole story on that). I did have two pairs of shoes as back up.
One of the patrons over indulged a bit and it was obvious he could not drive home. My co-bar tender called a cab (free rides home NYE if you drink too much) but it would be an hour wait. I watched as he swayed and weaved in his bar stool and decided I should hold him up. Here is where the whole heel thing went terribly wrong.
First he was in a bar tools and i just made sure he didn't crash to the floor. But I had a job to do as I could not just stand there all night. I tried to keep an eye on him as I worked the bar but somehow I got distracted. A patron came up and asked me if I knew the guy who was drinking had left the bar. I looked up and he was GONE:eek:. I rushed from behind the bar and found him staggering toward the back door. With the help of another man we stopped him. He was not willing to have us keep him there and he fought with us (not punch throwing but more wrestling). There I was, trying to hold this man from falling to the floor and stop him from leaving, on a slick tile floor in 3" heels. We did our little dance (believe me a drunk person has strength you don't realize) and he pinched my arm, pulled the material on my dress and twisted and turned. Finally he was sinking and the two of us could not hold him up so my compadre grabbed a chair and we lowered him down.
It was cold here last night and the hallway was not well sealed from the back door draft. That's when I felt the chill. :eek: I kept one hand on the man and reached back; my dress was above my hips. He had somehow pulled the hem up and it stayed there. I was standing in the hallway in my underwear and thigh highs exposed to anyone who came by. As quickly as I could I rearranged myself to some semblance of decency. I left my helper here holding our friend as I went to check on the bar business. it was under control so I went back. By this time the inebriated guy, was flashing back to his days in Nam and reliving an ambush he had gone through over 40 years ago. It took three of us to hold him down and with the help of our club chaplain who talked him down, we got it under control .
This is where I broke down though. I was emotionally exhausted and I started to cry (both from the physical and from the empathy over his days in the military). Then I realized that all the physical stuff on the hard tile floor had made my legs and feet start to hurt. I was worn out. It wasn't the bartending but it was something I never expected, that I would be involved in a physical matter. My first worry? What was my eyeliner going to look like. It was waterproof I guess because when I got to the mirror it had not run and even my hair was in place. One patron told me I looked I had just finished a good date.:rolleyes:. (OK that was not a direct quote but I can't print what he REALLY said)
It was time for the midnight toast and I waited until that was over to change shoes to my 2" Mary Janes with a bigger heel, but the holes in the mat were exactly the same dimension as the heel. Evey step I took I stuck in the mat. So I did break down and put on flats. 6 1/2 hours on my feet in the stilettos though. Not bad I think.
I had many compliments about my look. Everyone treated me like how I was dressed (some still have trouble getting used to calling me Lori or using feminine pronouns but they are trying. I am a Chica not a hombre). Yes I can Bunny Dip.
Our friend who had too many? He refused the cab and no one knows where he went (we could not force him and by the time we could get detox he was gone), but while waiting for the cab he asked me out three times. I am not sure but I hope he does not remember me accepting his date Saturday night:nailbiting: