a beginners guide?? :S

[Tracy - new dresser]

hi :) umm not sure where i should of posted this so ill start here, im only a CD but have no idea if im a MtF candidate..

where do i start? who do i see/talk to?

any starter guides on the net that have like yes/no questions to see if i should go further lol

im only 22 so im pretty confused and dont know what to do..


thanks in advance
Tracy - (CD)
xox

[SamanthaC]

Howdy, nice to see another Aussie. :)

Best suggestion is to find yourself a psychologist who specialises in gender identity issues. I got a referral to such a psychologist through my GP.

In terms of yes/no questions, seen plenty although they usually don't indicate much. I wouldn't put much weight in them.

If you don't mind me asking, is this new? What brought the questioning on?

[melissaK]

Sweetie, if you came over here to the TS side of the forum, why? The answer's within you, not within us; and it's not within any yes/no questionnaire.

You already know many TS start as CD for a lot of reasons, including that it's easier to rationalize our own "self acceptance" as a CD than as a TS. Some of us have always known. Some of us have to dig around through layers of cultural and moral conditioning by our parents or peers, and address our fears and undo our repressions of feelings to find out what we know inside. But in all cases, the answer was within each of us. And so it will be with you. :-)

[Tracy - new dresser]

Howdy, nice to see another Aussie. :)

Best suggestion is to find yourself a psychologist who specialises in gender identity issues. I got a referral to such a psychologist through my GP.

In terms of yes/no questions, seen plenty although they usually don't indicate much. I wouldn't put much weight in them.

If you don't mind me asking, is this new? What brought the questioning on?


ooo in melbourne :) wanna swap homes?

well where i live i doubt there will be a local psychologist who specialises in gender identity issues :(

and no this is not new to me at all, always been in the back of my mind since a teenage and even younger, just always pushed it away thinking im too masculine/ugly to ever become a woman so just forget it..

just now as ive gotten older its poping in my head more and more and mild depression is setting in (as much as i hate to say it)


Sweetie, if you came over here to the TS side of the forum, why? The answer's within you, not within us; and it's not within any yes/no questionnaire.

You already know many TS start as CD for a lot of reasons, including that it's easier to rationalize our own "self acceptance" as a CD than as a TS. Some of us have always known. Some of us have to dig around through layers of cultural and moral conditioning by our parents or peers, and address our fears and undo our repressions of feelings to find out what we know inside. But in all cases, the answer was within each of us. And so it will be with you. :-)

thanks :)

i kinda know inside, just wondering where to go from here thats all.. sorry bout the yes/no list lol

[SamanthaC]

ooo in melbourne :) wanna swap homes?

well where i live i doubt there will be a local psychologist who specialises in gender identity issues :(

and no this is not new to me at all, always been in the back of my mind since a teenage and even younger, just always pushed it away thinking im too masculine/ugly to ever become a woman so just forget it..

just now as ive gotten older its poping in my head more and more and mild depression is setting in (as much as i hate to say it)

Hmmm no thanks... Nowhere I'd rather be than in Melbourne :)

Otherwise, if you are TS, you'll work out in time how far you need to go down any particular path, as per Melissa's post :)

I might suggest making contact with the QLD Seahorse community if you have not already. No doubt you'll find local resources and contacts there.

[Tracy - new dresser]

Hmmm no thanks... Nowhere I'd rather be than in Melbourne :)

Otherwise, if you are TS, you'll work out in time how far you need to go down any particular path, as per Melissa's post :)

I might suggest making contact with the QLD Seahorse community if you have not already. No doubt you'll find local resources and contacts there.


ahhh but qld too hot lol :P

wow i didnt know there was a whole QLD based site :) thanks sooo much :)

[Michelle.M]

hi :) umm not sure where i should of posted this so ill start here, im only a CD but have no idea if im a MtF candidate..

meliisaK is right, you probably already know the answer.

I almost have to laugh; you sound like me. I began to come to grips with my gender identity at New Year's as well (all of that self evaluation and hopes for the future stuff) and began to take steps to find out what was going on. My therapist tells me this is typical - she gets most of her new clients around the beginning of the year.

So, first - good job! Asking the questions is the first and (for me) the scariest part. Getting the answers made it much better.

And like you, I already knew the answer, but I needed a professional to corroborate what I thought was happening, and I needed some context to help make sense of it all.

Find a therapist, and do it soon. No doubt other girls here from Australia can help you find a competent therapist who can help you o your way.

And Happy New Year!

[Tracy - new dresser]

And like you, I already knew the answer, but I needed a professional to corroborate what I thought was happening, and I needed some context to help make sense of it all.

well yes that pretty much it, i am totally scared actually too.

how do i go about finding a therapist? yellow pages lol?

[Jorja]

I don't know about a beginners guide but the first page should read " Run, Run away as fast as you can!!!!"

As you laugh at the Yellow pages, yes, that is exactly where you need to look. Call a few of them up and ask if they have experience with transgender issues. Ask friends for references. Here in the US many colleges and universities will have a good TG experienced therapist. You might look into that. Also, you will find most big cities will have a few therapist with TG experience.

[LeaP]

well yes that pretty much it, i am totally scared actually too.

how do i go about finding a therapist? yellow pages lol?

The WPATH site has a "find a provider" page. It doesn't give results from a directory, though. Rather, it will result in them referring you. The chances of getting a gender therapist are excellent, though. Unfortunately, you have to choose between a number of specialties (psychology, psychiatry, marriage and family therapy, social work) - all of which have gender specialists. I suppose you could submit several requests. There are several Australian cities listed in the location dropdown.

http://www.wpath.org/find_a_provider.cfm

[Marleena]

I was going to suggest somebody here create a TS handbook as a money maker. Somebody beat us to it though. Link: http://www.amazon.com/Praeger-Handbook-Transsexuality-Changing-Psychology/dp/0275991768

Oh..and Tracy I agree a gender therapist is a great idea to help you get some answers..

[SandraAbsent]

I agree with what everyone has said here, in that you most assuredly know the answer already. Find a therapist if you feel you need one. I choose to start my transition without one, and now I am starting to second guess that decision. I'm sure many of us here have scoured the internet for "how to guides." We may have even found some and picked bits and pieces from it, but none of them are ever complete for our personal and individual experiences. Unless you are a master of self evaluation and a master at handling both your negative and positive emotions or experiences, a therapist serves to help guide you through this. Deciding to transition runs you through a sea of emotions, and every step is filled with new complications, feelings, and experiences. Do yourself a favor and find someone to act as a guide!

[kimdl93]

I'll offer a slightly contrary opinion. It seems entirely possible to me that you do not know, deep inside, whether or not you are TS. Its not always immediately clear to everyone. If you read this forum long enough, you'll see many individuals who either were incredibly successful at suppressing their nature, or for whatever reason, became aware of their TS nature later in life.

Regardless of how one seeks the answer, it seems that the process is pretty much the same. At some point, you need to seek professional support in clarifying your self image, wants and needs. If you're beginning to experience mild depression, then I'd encourage you to speak with a competent psychologist soon. There's no reason to endure depression. Its very treatable in most mild cases without medication through cognitive therapy....basically retraining your mind to think in more positive, realistic terms.

[Kaitlyn Michele]

hi :) umm not sure where i should of posted this so ill start here, im only a CD but have no idea if im a MtF candidate..

............any starter guides on the net that have like yes/no questions to see if i should go further lol



Just based on your post Tracy i'd stick with being a cd, going into that forum, doing what you can to live a cd lifestyle and see what happens..
there is no reason to think of yourself as transsexual like its a continuation of your crossdressing...BY FAR there are more crossdressers than transsexuals, and you do not want all the problems being transsexual causes in your life

over time, if you are not a cd then it will become more and more obvious to you.

finding a therapist is a good step because they know lots of different people in the community...but it would also be helpful to just meet some people and i don't know whether you have any opportunity to meet people that are crossdressers in your area...

[ChelseaErtel]

I think it's good you are asking the question. If you are thinking you are TS, there could be several reasons. This site may influence you, or you are TS, or a CD etc.. As stated before, seek a gender experienced therapist and find out. Be TOTALLY HONEST with the therapist, think hard and dig deep and the therapist will help you find the answer. You are so young and you will be able to find the correct path if you seek professional help.

I'm 52 and just realized I was TS last about 7 or 8 months ago. I began questioning myself about 15 months ago and after seeing a TG psychologist we came to the conclusion I was TS. Didn't take us long considering.

So seek that professional help THEN begin to plan your life. If you are TS, then you have quite a lot to do but you are young enough and from the avatar seem feminine.

Good luck.

[Nicole Erin]

Only you can decide how you want to live your life. Not us, not your parents, not some overly expensive "therapist", not some priest...

The only thing I would say about how to live is - keep your options open. Do not get yourself into something you cannot easily get out of. That means - don't go joining the military, don't get married, don't have kids, and don't get in trouble with the law. Well unless you really need or want to do these things.

Also, do not worry about all the talk about what makes someone a "true TS" cause none of us really know. Since there are no "set in stone" rules about if one is TS, then how can someone really "know"? If you want to live as a woman, then do so. Unless you go and get expensive surgeries to feminize your face and privates, you can always go back to living as a man. Since such surgeries are expensive, you will know long before you have the money if it's the right choice.

I never did get why everyone is always saying to find some therapist. Do they need to be told what they already know?

[Tracy - new dresser]

Only you can decide how you want to live your life. Not us, not your parents, not some overly expensive "therapist", not some priest...

The only thing I would say about how to live is - keep your options open. Do not get yourself into something you cannot easily get out of. That means - don't go joining the military, don't get married, don't have kids, and don't get in trouble with the law. Well unless you really need or want to do these things.

Also, do not worry about all the talk about what makes someone a "true TS" cause none of us really know. Since there are no "set in stone" rules about if one is TS, then how can someone really "know"? If you want to live as a woman, then do so. Unless you go and get expensive surgeries to feminize your face and privates, you can always go back to living as a man. Since such surgeries are expensive, you will know long before you have the money if it's the right choice.

I never did get why everyone is always saying to find some therapist. Do they need to be told what they already know?


yeh i have no idea, im going to see psychologist? is there i difference lol. my problem is i dont really know whats going on in my head. one day im happy, next day im sad, third day woman, fourth day man. just blahhh. i only want to talk to someone face to face just so i can get it all out..