Reaction

[Jan W]

Ladies, I experienced an interesting reaction this last Saturday night while out at our favourite Club in Melbourne (Aus)

During the night I and my girlfriend (also TG) had for some reason a lot of interaction with GG's. While this often happens the amount was somewhat unusual.

Towards the end of the night a very nice (but inebriated) lady come up to me and enquired about our motivations to dress. I told her that if we knew the answer to that we would be in possession of some pretty exclusive knowledge but the shock came when she asked if we were a couple. I replied that we were straight and that we both had children. The look that came over her was absolute bewilderment! It spun her out, totally speechless.

Now the interesting thing was that this is an alternative club that is anything but mainstream.

I feel that this experience really points out the lack of knowledge in the community concerning us as a group.

Have any of you girls had similar experiences in your neck of the woods?

Jan

[sherri]

I have fielded numerous questions like that from gay guys.

The first shock for them comes when I tell them I'm not gay. That astonishes them. They tend ask very specific and persistent questions about my sexuality, so I tell them that I'm bi, but weighted toward hetero. I don't bring it up unless they do cuz it tends to kill the conversation - how did you put it? Spins them out. Lol.

As for why, I tell them it's an expression of a decidedly feminine aspect of my personality and character, that I feel more completely me when I adopt a feminine personna. If the conversation survives that little nugget, I go on to talk about feeling sexy dressed this way, that I want someone to respond romantically to my femininity, etc etc. If they maintain their composure and interest, I might mention that I have observed plenty of gays who, while they're dressed straight, behave like girls, so dressing like a girl is just an outward extension of that.

To me, it's a no-brainer, but it seems to mystify them. At least they act like it does. What I actually suspect sometimes is that some of them are drawn to it, but they don't want their friends to see them cozying up to the CD. There's a stigma there somewhere, although I don't understand it.

[JennyCD]

Almost everyone assumes that a crossdresser is gay. I also feel that's where many of us experience a lot of emotional anguish over our crossdressing, feeling that if we want to dress we must also somehow be gay. I know that caused me a lot of problems at one point until I finally realized that one has nothing at all to do with the other.

It's a lack of any real wide-spread knowledge about crossdressing. Most people's only knowledge comes from seeing drag queens on television. We also haven't exactly been well depicted in movies or television shows.

[Wendy me]

should it shock you ??? i meen what's the frist thing a gg will ask up abought our dressing??? thats sooooo easy the "are you gay?" see we have this jerry springer image that people see and with out being informed abought our cding that only get the negitive things .. at the point someone asks answer them and explane to them a bit or two abought our little world....

NOTE DISCLAMER:.........


in no way shape or form was my answer ment to offend any one that is gay , might be gay , knows any one gay, or might be just a little bi or even a lot bi...

thankyou....

[kathy gg]

hi,

For several years my hubby and I volunteered at the Pride booth that our group has and you can bet money that every year several curious gays and lesbians come up and ask about 'what is being trangendered?' At first I was a bit stunned, thinking out of of all the people, shouldn't they know??? But really just like wives or non-trans people, this is certainly not a subject one gets educated on unless you have a reason to do so.

Yes most gays and lesbians are shocked and surprised that a man who dresses as a woman c/would be hetrosexual and is *gasp* married to a female. Just seems as odd to them as many outside of the communtiy. It does not compute. But that said, I do find that once given the gist of the situation, they are almost immediatly accepting of the situation.

[Marla GG]

Hey Jan,

It's great that you got an opportunity to enlighten some people. I have to agree, people are not very well informed about crossdressers. I didn't really know of the existence of heterosexual CDs until I was in relationship with one -- despite being open-minded, despite having taken a ton of college courses in psychology and human sexuality, and despite having gay, lesbian, and "alternative" friends. The information just isn't reaching the general public the way it should be. It's rare that we get to chance to explain our lifestyle to anyone because they don't usually ask (unless, of course, they are drunk!)

[Kierci]

:iagree: with MarlaGG

[freshfrankie]

When I came out to my wife of 25 years a few months ago the first thing she said was"Are you gay?" I said"No" Then she said I could never have sex with you again because I'm not a lesbian" I replied "But I am!:) She moved out in October and I've never been happier. Her lose. I think she just can't accept the fact that I look better than her in a dress! Ladies,we all should of been born rich instead of good looking. :) Lots of you gals look great. Cindy Crawford eat your heart out!Big hugs.

Love
Jeannie

PS. Look around at most women and you will notice that we gals have some killer legs.

[SherriePall]

I was shopping for a sweater to go with a denim skirt before Halloween. After getting through to the young sales girl that it was for me, she fell all over herself helping me select a couple and then provided with a short denim skirt to try on with the sweaters. When I said I was only buying one, she reminded me that the store had a buy one, get one half off sale. I told I only needed one, but she said how about for your mother. No. How about for your sister? No, I said again, adding how about for my wife? She thought the usual -- dressing up is not for heterosexuals.

[sherri]

Something that mystifies me is that gays and lesbians obviously love drag queens - if you don't believe me, just go to a gay or lesbian bar any night they're having a drag show - yet so few are interested in CDs or TVs for personal relationships. I just don't get it ... but then I don't get Broadway musicals either. :confused:

[Clarissa3d]

There is a great amount of people that either don't know as kathy stated don't know until they have to.
To repeat the statement yes when I came out to my wife her first reaction was (all together) "are you gay" and I said no. Now to be honest my ex is very homophobic but she was say she is not. She just says it's wrong!

As many times as I tried to reassure her that I am not gay she could not find anyway to deal with it nor try to deal with my cross-dressing.

I have many different Friends and regardless if they are gay bi extreme or what ever there personal choice is, I realize first off I am not hear to judge others as I am NOT in a position to Judge! I mean I am sitting here in a skirt silk blouse and hose. Come on. No but truly each person here in this small world have many different gifts to bring to the table regardless of what they wear or how they look.

Before jumping into a repulse stance I would hope as i have seen in different thread today that a GF of a newly confessed cross-dresser people would be curious enough to simply want to learn more rather than pass judgment.

Sorry for the ramble

[Michelle Hart]

A few weeks back My GG amn I went to the Village station located in dallas. Here we were all dressed up and glamourus and this group of gay men kept staring at me. finally they start asking "the question" I said no of course but they just could not believe it.

I thought it was kinda funny that of all the people out there who can't "get it" they surley would be they did'nt.

Go figure......