crossing the line

[andrea lace]

I was wondering how many girls out there act feminine when dressed and in girl mode try there hardest to act girly.I have thought about this a lot and feel for myself this would take an enormous amount of hard work to get right.I have decided that when dressed as Andrea I would just act like my male self but while dressed my wife called me Lacey (her little pet name for Andrea) and I really felt good when she called me this I don't know exactly why it felt so good acceptance i suppose.What I was really wondering is for those who act feminine when dressed do these traits pass over to your male persona and do you feel uncomfortable when this happens.I have only told my wife about my wants and desires and she is the only person I have come out to and would feel really annoyed if I was with my friends and in guy mode Andrea's traits started to show through. Many thanks girls

[AllieSF]

You have a logical worry. I think it really gets down to, as you say, being outed by yourself unintentionally when female traits flow over to your male side. Not sure of your age and experience, but in my case being old, experienced in life in general, retired, single and ready to live my life as I feel, I hardly ever worry what flows from one mode to the other. When I dress en femme, I want to act femininely (not girly because I am too old for that!), in my presentation, mannerisms, how I walk and sit, and hopefully one day getting my voice a bit more feminine and less masculine. I have also found that very little if any true feminine traits actually do flow over when in male mode. When they do, I normally catch them and stop what ever that was. I have also become better at coming up with quick responses to unexpected questions, again based on life experiences. I feel comfortable with myself and hopefully you will too some day in the future. Good luck and thanks for asking.

[Melissa Rose]

I sort of have the same problem; however, I look at it in a different way. My feminine traits are the norm and I have to butch up when presenting as a male. I really don't try to be feminine, it is the more natural state for me. I have to work at being more masculine in some ways. I spend more time in public as a woman and more people know me as one so I'm usually on autopilot without really thinking about it.

[genevie]

The more I let the girl out, the more the girl comes out. I've noticed lately at work, that I'm more something. I don't know the right word for it. Lighter? Breezier? What ever it is, feels great.

[andrea lace]

H AllieSF i am 41 years old and only came out just recently. My wife is cool with it and has done nothing but help since I told her, she has given me make up tips bought me lingerie and let me wear her clothes.I have always dressed in secret at times but only with things I could put away remove or take off in a hurry.I have asked my wife if she thinks I am a bit camp at times she says no but people who get to know me well assume that I am gay even though I am not attracted to men in any way.I assume this is because I am in touch with my feminine side and always have been even though I don't think I act in a feminine way.I have always struggled with this gender identity thing and didn't even know what it was or how I was supposed to feel.My wife and I have been finding out about Andrea together and only recently it feels like someone has turned the light on

[Cheryl T]

My wife and I were out one night and as we were riding home she commented that I acted very feminine.
I told her "It's not an act". Once dressed it's just me, I don't try to 'act' I just relax and am who I am.

[Kate Simmons]

Once you become comfortable with yourself and your feelings, you can drop the "act" in both directions.:)

[Beverley Sims]

I think only girls of slight build and aged about twenty have a license to act girly.
They look cute, the rest of us just have to wear it.
If you have been dressing a while and your knowledge of female habits is good you do have to be careful about joining in a mixed conversation about female habits and fashion.
It is hard but rewarding to act ignorant of the subject.

[AllieSF]

Andrea, you made me think about me before I ever even thought about dressing as a woman. t was about 12 years ago and I was leaving my job and location after 7 years and went to my going away party with family and friends. Later they sent me some pics when I was at my new destination. I had lost weight, am petite in body structure and had shorter hair because it was easier to get ready and go after taking a shower. I looked at the pick and said to myself, now there is a femme guy. It was not common for me to see pics of myself seated. Normally they are mostly standing. There I was with my legs crossed almost like a woman, my arms and hands close to my body, and well maybe you can imagine the look. So, I had the look before I ever thought of dressing. Go figure. Maybe that was pre-leaking??!! I would not have cared if someone had made some comment about it because I was comfortable with who I was then, and care even less today what they think I may be for the reasons stated in my post above. It truly is a nice place to be, not perfect but nice.

[carhill2mn]

I always do my best to act like a lady. As a result, I am usually treated as one!

[kimdl93]

In reality we are a mix of traits, some which may be interpreted as feminine in one setting, and go unnoticed in another. I don't make a conscious effort to act in an exaggeratedly feminine manner, but certainly some of my traits seems more so when I'm en femme. Don't sweat it!

[Petra_Briar]

The more I explore my feminine self, the more my feminine traits are coming out.... AND IT FEELS GREAT!

[Angela Campbell]

There are many things I am learning to do just to appear more like a lady, such as keeping my knees together, that are things GG's learn from childhood that boys are not taught. I guess I am also having to unlearn many things boys are taught to do as well. It is all a choice for me as I want to be female as much as it is possible for me, so yes it is hard, very hard, but others have done it so I can too. Yes many of these things are beginning to cross over to my male side. I do not care. I do tend to be careful in some situations but I am getting more towards that direction. I have always been a little girly anyway and learned as a boy to hide it as much as I can just for survival. I am now at the point where being thought of as a "sissy" (which is what I was called a lot as a boy) really does not mean much anymore.

[Kathleen Ann Trees]

As long as I can remember I've had this feminine side and am finally getting to know it. I've never thought or felt I was a girl, but I wish I would have realized when I was younger it is okay to let that side of me live. So now I find I like learning about and experiencing femininity. It can be stupidly simple things like noticing a subconscious little wrist droop when I relax while carrying a purse, to more consciously slowing and softening my voice when dressed. Now I struggle with how to be a leader at some level versus waiting for the world, including my family, to catch up.

[marny]

The more I let the girl out, the more the girl comes out. I've noticed lately at work, that I'm more something. I don't know the right word for it. Lighter? Breezier? What ever it is, feels great.

genevie. you look alot like mary ann from gillgans island! yes?

[GinaD]

Andrea,
As Gina, I enjoy being as womanly as possible. The voice doesn't really make it there but I spend a lot of time watching women and adopting their mannerism, posture, etc. as Gina. As Gina, I feel that I am a woman and act accordingly depending on my activities. But, it is a conscious effort. I don't have to think about my male persona, and I don't think Gina bleeds over to the male world. Could be wrong, but it seems as if my thought processes are distinctly different in each role.