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View Full Version : It's the "Little Moments" That Make All the Difference.



Persephone
01-14-2013, 04:48 PM
Most of us know the drill -- last kid picked for the teams, one of the favorites among the bullies, all the crap we went through growing up.

Who knows? Maybe it would have been the same if we'd grown up on the girl side?

I don't know, but I do know that after all the years of crawling out from the rocks I've begun to find some of those "Small Moments" that can make the difference.

This week had three examples that brought a lift to my spirits and very nearly tear to my eyes 'cause when they happen they just feel so damn good!

1. I was at a meeting of my women's spirituality group, about 20 of us (the other 19 were, to the best of my trained eye and knowledge, GG's, none of whom know I'm any different) crowded into someone's home.

Our hostesses' husband was there as well, although he didn't take part in the meeting but was around, probably because there was a table with snacks, and he was looking glum.

One of the women turned to me and said, "Poor guy. The only man in a room full of women."

Secretly, I smiled inside and thought, "Almost."

2. My son was taking some acquaintances out for dinner, people who had never met my spouse or me, and he invited his Mom and his "Aunt Barb" to come along.

His confidence in my abilities really made me feel great!

We spent the entire evening with the group, one more guy and two women, and there was never a flicker to indicate that anything was "unusual."

The next day I asked him if there were any comments and he said, "No. The only thing one of the women said was that she realized afterwards that she had gone on and on telling you one of her stories and she hoped she hadn't bored my Aunt."

3. My women's social group (different from the group mentioned above) has a monthly dinner get together. About 20 women attended this month and while many in that group do know that I have an "unusual past" they have become comfortable with me.

Every month we celebrate the Birthdays of the women who are there. This month I was the only Birthday woman there. I seriously had a tear in my eye as they had a Sundae with a Birthday candle brought for me and they all sang "Happy Birthday Dear Barbara" (for those who don't know, Barbara, not Persephone, is my name).

Vignettes of life.

Hugs,
Persephone.

Laura912
01-14-2013, 05:40 PM
One of these days I am going to come to southern California and look you up and turn green all over you because you make all this look so easy!!! :clap:

kimdl93
01-14-2013, 05:55 PM
Those moments would certainly make up for the school yard indignities and years of hiding (I actually don't know how many years you hid from yourself...). I know most of us can look back with some regret that we didn't come out earlier in life. Was that the case for you too, Barb?

PS. 37 posts to 10,000 then I promise to shut up!

Barbara Ella
01-14-2013, 06:08 PM
Wonderful vignettes of life for sure. "Little" moments might lie in the eye of the beholder, and to my mind it would be a true woman who looked at them as little moments. A lot of us would consider these miraculous moments.

I guess you are a true woman and have that perspective now. Good for you, Barbara (just love that name)

Barbara

Lady Catherine
01-14-2013, 06:57 PM
I love to hear all these positive things. So happy for you.

Kate Simmons
01-14-2013, 07:35 PM
This is exactly the way things should be my friend. I love the fact that you are always just yourself. :)

Eryn
01-14-2013, 07:44 PM
Thanks for sharing those moments with us.

Having socialized with your son in both modes I will say that he is wonderful with those of us who live two genders. I have never felt less than welcomed and comfortable with him.

Marcia Blue
01-14-2013, 08:28 PM
Barbra,
I am so glad you had such special moments. Everyone needs more of them, since no one ever really has enough. Enjoy them all!!

Beverley Sims
01-14-2013, 08:48 PM
Barbara,
I think it is wonderful for you not to be bullied for who you are and be praised instead.
This goes for many others as well.

Dana L
01-14-2013, 09:02 PM
Great to hear how things are going for you. I think many of us would hope to get to that place. About the bullies, it's possible they may have been one of us and were scared by what they saw inside themselves and overcompensated to not be discovered or to prove their manlyness to themselves.

S. Lisa Smith
01-14-2013, 09:15 PM
I always enjoy your posts!!!! It's wonderful how you live your life!!

Leah Lynn
01-14-2013, 09:32 PM
It's those moments that make life worth living. Lovely, cherished moments.


Leah

justmetoo
01-14-2013, 10:28 PM
lovely little moments indeed. :) I'm glad to read about those.

RenneB
01-14-2013, 10:49 PM
It's those moments that make it all worth while. I too count my blessings everyday and thank the big girl 'upstairs' for blessing me with health and every now and then the time to be myself....

Thanks for being just Barb, Barb..

Renne.....

Kathi Lake
01-15-2013, 01:11 AM
And we here love to hear about those moments. Hey, ain't nothing wrong with vicarious happiness!

:)

Kathi

Deedee Skyblue
01-15-2013, 08:12 AM
PS. 37 posts to 10,000 then I promise to shut up!

Yeah, right... Please don't!

Deedee

docrobbysherry
01-15-2013, 12:46 PM
There's a special feeling that runs thru u when u realize someone thinks/thot u were a female.

For most of us, that rarely or never happens. You're blessed, Barbara!

Foxglove
01-15-2013, 03:08 PM
Hi, Persephone!

I had one of those moments this afternoon. I was in a café having a cup of tea. These four guys came in for a meeting and a bite to eat. From their conversation I'd say they were building contractors. They were all huge. Lately guys have started looking like an alien species to me.

I'm not exactly huge myself--5' 3", if the humidity's fairly high. I can tell you I felt very small. I sighed inwardly and said, "I really should have been a girl!" But the feeling the moment gave me was rather nice actually. I felt like I fit in, something I haven't often felt in my life.

Best wishes, Annabelle