Movies, Fantasies and Regrets

[Eddie]

I was watching The Family Man the other night, with Nic Cage and Tea Leone.
( One of my fovorite movies, also, Forrest Gump )
I find myself thinking, sometimes longing for, a life like that. What if I didn't have the need to dress. I could have had a family and a life like that. I accept myself for who I am and am comfortable with that, but sometimes I think, wouldn't life have been better with my " Jenny" and a little Forrest? ( BTW, I ALWAYS cry when Forrest is talking to Jenny at her grave and gives her little Forrest's letter ). I know I can't change who I am, but every now and then I always think, what if?? Ugh!
Does any one else have these feelings?

[darla_g]

I love that movie Family Man. But don't think that dressing is an obstacle for you. Why would you say that? I believe that there are a number of partners that would be ok with it.

[Vanessa5]

I think there are a lot of us that think that way-if I weren't a crossdresser then my life would be sooo much better. However, we are who we are and should embrace our uniqueness. Who wants to be "normal" if "normal" people can't accept you for who you are. And if you accept yourself, then be comforatable in your skin.

[Jenniferathome]

No, never. I have a great wife and fantastic children. Cross dressing does not prevent a good life. It is a complication in any relationship but not a reason to give up on a life.

[lingerieLiz]

Thinking what if you might have had a better life is dangerous. First of all we are responsible for our lives. We make decisions and change directions along the way. Your life could be worse! Every time I feel sorry for myself I go by the VA hospital or a shelter and see people much worse off than I am.

I have had a good life. Would things have been easier if I wasn't a CD? Maybe, but on the other hand I have friends who have had bad things happen to them and I don't think any of them are crossdressers. I have some gay and lesbian friends that are happy with their lives and what they have achieved. I know other people who are crying the blues about their lives. It is all perspective!

[Eddie]

Thinking what if you might have had a better life is dangerous. First of all we are responsible for our lives. We make decisions and change directions along the way. Your life could be worse! Every time I feel sorry for myself I go by the VA hospital or a shelter and see people much worse off than I am.

I have had a good life. Would things have been easier if I wasn't a CD? Maybe, but on the other hand I have friends who have had bad things happen to them and I don't think any of them are crossdressers. I have some gay and lesbian friends that are happy with their lives and what they have achieved. I know other people who are crying the blues about their lives. It is all perspective!

I am happy with where I am in life and who I am. I have many good friends, a good job and good health. Not complaining. What I was trying to say, was that life would have been a little less complicated not having to deal with the CD'ing. After 2 divorces, I am still looking for my " Jenny" Not ever going to give up on life. I am not a quitter! I actually love my life!

[Beverley Sims]

Sometimes I get flashes of what you say, but I only have to see real life on the street to realise life is good for me.
X Dressing may have been a great time consumer for me but I still enjoy my little adventures now.
They used to be big ones when I was young and single.

[joanna4]

If that is your regret, I really wished that you would have lived life starting a family and having your " Jenny and little Forrest" just to have them. I will go that route as well and I know a lot of people do regardless of egos, drug addictions, etc. I'm sorry to hear that.

[Kate Simmons]

I've already lived the "what if?", had it all pretty much. Now it's my time to travel down the fork of the road I didn't take the first time. :)

[Gillian Gigs]

To live you life with regret and what ifs only leads to more regret and what ifs. Like the dog who chases its tail, it goes nowhere really fast. You will never be able to move on with life until you can accept who you are and where you are at. Yes, I know that you wrote that you accept yourself....but you are still saying the what ifs, and use the word regret in your title to this thread.

[SandraInHose]

^ What Gillian says is right on the money. I think of my regrets in life every day and it just drags me down even further.

Without going in detail, a LOT has happened over the past several years that has changed our lives dramatically. I can't help but re-live many of those moments that perhaps would have turned out different if I'd acted/reacted differently. On one hand, I'm still better off than some, but I know things could have been so much better. But I've got to learn to let go and move forward!

[Angie G]

Eddie I dress I have 1 wife 2 kids and 7 grandkids. It can be done. the only thing is just my knows she accepts Angie and she gets time with Ed her wonderful
husband.Seh even helps. Just keep on keeping on hun IT CAN HAPPEN.:hugs:
Angie

[CassandraSmith]

I was watching The Family Man the other night, with Nic Cage and Tea Leone.
( One of my fovorite movies, also, Forrest Gump )
I find myself thinking, sometimes longing for, a life like that. What if I didn't have the need to dress. I could have had a family and a life like that. I accept myself for who I am and am comfortable with that, but sometimes I think, wouldn't life have been better with my " Jenny" and a little Forrest? ( BTW, I ALWAYS cry when Forrest is talking to Jenny at her grave and gives her little Forrest's letter ). I know I can't change who I am, but every now and then I always think, what if?? Ugh!
Does any one else have these feelings?

My thought lately is how I'd be a matriarch by now if I were a genetic woman and how different and likely much more rich my life would have been. As a very thin person, I never really was able to compete athletically or physically in a male dominated world. Sometimes, I wonder if I'd be a lesbian but I suspect that I would have just found men interesting as a real woman and done what everyone else does--find a good man and settle down and make kids.

Regarding regret, I'm thinking this isn't about regret, it's about loss. There's two kinds of loss--losing something we have and the loss of never getting something we needed. When I think of my life, it's about what I needed but was unable to understand or even conceive of when I was younger because I so misunderstood my needs as a CDer. Had I known what I know now, I'd go out all loud and proud as a young person and asked directly for what I wanted in life. All this pain I've experienced as a CDer is just because I didn't understand it or how it makes me a special person.