What causes the urge to crossdress?

[adrienner99]

I know this question is old and tired for some, but after many years of dressing it still fascinates and eludes me....Is anyone aware of any credible studies or articles on what causes the urge to dress, or of any theories that actually make sense?

Mainly, I know I just love it and would find it miserable to live without my feminine things...and yes, the reasons may vary by individual...still I wonder if there is not some common element....

[Jenni Yumiko]

I think if they knew for sure, they would try to cut it out of us. So we can be fixed to conform to the norm.

[Girl]

It just feels right. I totally feel like a girl and so I just have to dress as a girl. I can't imagine myself any other way.

[katlee]

When I am depressed or want the rush of something that I can control.

[Kelley]

I read a paper written by a CD who is a professor at a major collage. It was a well written analisys of his development as a CD. At the end of the paper he addressed the question "why do we dress en femme". After writing a very detailed description of CDing his answer was very short "I don't know". I don't think anyone knows why so I just leave it as it just is.

[sometimes_miss]

There's no one simple answer to this, because we do it for an assortment of reasons, many of which aren't acceptable to the affected individual so that they refuse to admit even to themselves why they do it.. Sure, people have tried to study it, but it really defies any one answer; the most obvious reason, is that most crossdressers simply won't come out of the closet to become part of any study. The only ones of us who ever get noticed by the psychiatric societies that might be interested, are those who go to therapists; not a really good sample to study, as there's no way to know exactly how representative that sample is of the whole group. If you want a theory for one person that figured it out for himself, well that would be me (and it took decades for me to do it, probably because the therapists I went to knew less about the subject than I did). But you'll have to read my bio to learn the whole story. Link is in my signature at the bottom of my posts.

[Jenniferathome]

There are not studies that can show why, only some common themes reported by cross dressers like stress relief, calming, inner peace, that kind of cross. It is obvious to me that it is genetic because no one would choose to be a cross dresser.

[sometimes_miss]

There are not studies that can show why only some common themes reported by cross dressers like stress relief, calming, inner Pete, that kind of cross. It is obvious to me that it is genetic because no one would choose to be a cross dresser.
No one would choose to be a bigot, seriel killer, or mass murderer if they had the choice, either. The simple explanation of course is, 'sh!t happens'. Various life experiences influence our thoughts, and believe it or not, our own thoughts can change us; for good or bad, and for 'male or female'.
I had no desire to dress as a, or be a girl, until after I was molested (other than the occasional notice that my older sister seemed to be treated better than I was, to which I attributed to her being female) and until that occurance, I felt in every way that I was a boy, behaving as such as well as self identifying as one. But, thereafter, various influences in my life continued to move me towards crossdressing, as well as distort my gender identity to the point where I began to believe that I 'felt' like a girl by the time I was a teen. Our minds aren't 'finished' when we're born, they continue to develop throughout our lives, and external events can make either temporary or permanent changes in us as our lives progress. A simple example is, that if we constantly do an activity, we get better at it, up to the extent of our physical capacity and our knowledge of it. This is not to say we are entirely consciously aware of what's going on, or that it's a 'choice'; it goes on whether we are aware of it or not, and or if we want it to happen or not. My abuser planted the seeds of gender identity disorder into my head; as years went on, assuming that he was right and that god had made a mistake, I read into past happenings in my life that I thought indicated that he was correct, which reinforced the idea that I was really female. Too young to have the knowledge to discredit his suggestion, I went along with it, gradually reinforcing it until I was teaching myself to be a girl. By the time I learned enough to dispute the idea, the feelings of being female all the time had become part of me. Knowing that it is false, does not stop the feelings. My own theory, which has been supported by a few therapists that I have spoken to, is that at some point in our lives, our gender identity becomes permanent: It is not at 'one second, one minute, one day in time', but gradually as something in our minds 'sets', much in the same way that our speech pattern sets during puberty, as at about that point it is set into us whether we will develop an accent when we learn new languages. None of this is written in stone; there are no studies being done, basically because it would require lifetime controlled studies, which we do not do on humans. And as no other creatures are advanced enough to speak to us, there is no way to do experiments with them, either.

Or, you can simply go with the Popeye theory: 'I yam what I yam'.

Edit; an even better example is military training, where they 'break you down' and then build you into the soldier they want you to be. For the lack of a better term, 'brainwashing' is nothing new. And when done for a long time, whether inflicted by an outside source or by our own behavior and beliefs, it becomes more and more likely to be permanent. Whether you want to believe that certain pathways in our brains become 'stronger' or whatever, continuous reinforcement of repeated behavior makes it more likely to feel 'normal' to the individual.
The huge problem we have with crossdressing is the ingrained homophobia throughout the world; virtually every male is told from the moment we are self aware that being feminine is a horrendous thing, we're even taught that god feels it's wrong. So you have a huge population of crossdressers who can't even admit to themselves that they have any connection to wanting to do, act or be female. It goes so far as to cause some of us to split our personalities into 'our male self' and 'our fem self'. You'll often see written on these forums men talking about their other 'female personality' as a distinct different person(a). It's a way of avoiding any connection with that behavior, which their male mind simply cannot accept as part of himself.

[TeresaL]

There are not studies that can show why only some common themes reported by cross dressers like stress relief, calming, inner Pete, that kind of cross. It is obvious to me that it is genetic because no one would choose to be a cross dresser.
There are studies from medical and psychological professions, however we may with some due, respect, reason, and our own logic refute and refuse these studies.

Genetics is an underlying theme and/or ingredient throughout the professions. Another ingredient needed is a trigger. The long or short fuse which ignites the inborn disposition and proclivity to crossdress. Multitudes of events, persons, and physiological events can trigger our genetic behavior, no matter how long the dormancy. So we are indeed varied when tasked to come up with a valid reason.

Latter day triggers may even occur by the influence of testosterone. Not all of us, though.

IMO and personal experience, normal serum testosterone and lowered DHT levels increase the urge. For me, my DHT was decreased due to a popular prostrate medication. However, tests revealed that my serum levels remained normal, while DHT was reduced. My cross dressing did increase. Later, my serum level was reduced and now my cross dressing is gone. See Anne Vitale for a more professional explanation. She has patients who completely lost their desire to crossdress upon starting an HRT regimen.

Not all of us fit that profile of course, but the need to know is available for those who wish to do the research or have the experience. HRT also is not something that would be considered for our population as a whole, and leans to the transexual side of TG umbrella. There exists a multitude of factors that need to be carefully weighed and assessed, and it is not a recommendation of mine without all the steps necessary to go down that path.

There are more than a handful of theories, and yet there is still not a one-fits-all solution. This is simply my take, however erroneous it may be. Yet after living through my personal experiences of this, I'm not that anxious to turn in my female role for a strictly cis gender life.

Our nature to cross the gender line is small, and not completely understood by either professionals or society in general. Society is probably our biggest stumbling block and stone casters.

[CassandraSmith]

For me, the potential for CDing was passed through our family as a valuation of things that were feminine. It manifested itself in several family members who are in the healing professions. For me, I was exposed to a grandmother and mother who were very strong willed and together women. My dad checked out before I was born. Mom basically wore the pants and she was very beautiful too. I think that clothing was something like armor for her and she would put on her makeup every day as if she were putting on war paint. I think I strongly identified with her power and also her self worth issues. So clothing became tied to feelings of safety and the expression of feminine energy. No wonder I was fascinated by it!!!


Cassy

[rachaelsloane]

What causes the urge to crossdress?
I might be in the minority here, but I why does it really matter? How many wonder why they like the arts or sports?
I enjoy it and don't plan on stopping anytime soon. Where did I leave my glass of wine?

[TeresaL]

I might be in the minority here, but I why does it really matter??
It probably matters to others though, for various reasons. Firstly, the OP asked.

As for me, my wife has asked many times. Telling her that I like panties, and it feels "oh so good," will do nothing for her but fuel a nasty feud. Those aren't answers, they are the results. (We feel good because we crossed dressed, but why did we cross dress)?

Then, those who study behavioral fields sometimes make it to our sector of the woods to study our "oddity." They look for answers and will make their own up in white papers, thesis, and DSM type manuals.

Not least of all is society, who without (or with(?) an answer hounds us as perverts at the very least. We aren't publicly free, yet we are public domain and moving targets when out and about. Bigots are still around,and some really do See us as fair game for prey. They will take a MtF to an alley and do anything anything. Those folks don't need answers, but knowledge might prevent just one beating or death. If only one of them that counts had an answer.

We really should be free to be us.

Those who don't need answers to anything are not necessarily the minority. But those that do, and are explorative in nature, or in trouble with dressing would like a fair shake, a fair deal, and an explanation.

[Beverley Sims]

It is not an old and tired question at all.
Even if it gets repeated there is always a new idea in the melting pot.
Personally I think it is just part of me.

[anastasiafantasia]

For me personally as a gay male who has never worked as a drag artist i find it quite difficult to explain.I don't fit the "normal" straight male paradigm of a CDer.However i think it totally has to do with expression and escapism with me.I find i can express myself, my mood etc.. with feminine clothing more readily and easily than en homme.It also allows me to escape from everyday pressures and delve into another "persona"; however inaccurate or false it might be compared to a GG's everyday perspective.Fantasy i guess is the key word for me personally.

[CassandraSmith]

I might be in the minority here, but I why does it really matter? How many wonder why they like the arts or sports?
I enjoy it and don't plan on stopping anytime soon. Where did I leave my glass of wine?

For me, it was just an excuse to talk about myself ;-)

[Chickhe]

I believe there are a lot of variables that trigger it. I think many people who CD are so repressed that eventually they become compulsive over time. I think though, there is something built in to more or lesser degrees and social conditioning has a huge influence on whether you feel like you fit the mold or not. One thing I struggled with most of my life was having different thoughts and pleasures than many people...I often hate joining groups because I just don't get the same enjoyment they are getting off repeated simple slapstick, but at the same time I still like being part of a team and what I noticed is in my own child, she recognizes that she also had huge different interests that most of her classmates...so I try to encourage her to try their ways too...just to experience life...so I wonder if some of it is just related to finding someplace you can call your own vs. feeling like a conformist... ...I am also genuiely fascinated by the transformation so...maybe we just know what's fun when we see it.

[Sometimes Steffi]

The biological answer is a dopamine defficiency. The cultural answer is what does it take to boost dopamine.

[busker]

There have been many more, to my recollection, who have started cding just as puberty hits. I did, at about 13, and it stayed a while and then it more or less went dormant for many years. It appeared on and off but returned just about the time I turned 60. Hormones?? Very likely. Andropause is the male version of menopause. After my cancer surgery, I started to develop gynecomastia and when I got blood tests, my T was in the ballpark, but my estrogen was higher that a females count and higher had she been in menopause.
I also think there is some psychological stimulus as well and that probably varies with the individual. Hormones would certainly explain the "older beginning CD" . There is likely some hormonal causes when the fetal brain gets masculinized as it may NOT get enough testosterone and retain some characteristics of the female brain. Female fetuses need no hormonal changes to become female. It doesn't have to be genetic necessarily. There are lots of switches that turn on and off the genes and they can get fouled up--blue eyes is a good example.
I read a recent paper that suggests being gay IS NOT genetic as it would eventually die out since there would be no reproduction among gays but history does show us that some gays to marry, have families and thus may pass along some predisposition. Another study with quite a bit of proof shows that women who bear a lot of children a more likely than not to produce gay sons in that or other generations , so great great grandma who had 10 kids is likely to have produced some gay children. So, we could also be within that spectrum--not necessarily gay but feminine in some part of out psyche. Gay may represent the ultimate feminization of the male fetal brain, and lesbian may represent the ultimate masculinization of the female fetal brain..

[franlee]

Self gradification, whether it be narsistic, sexual or theariputic including any combonation this should cover the base of it. Now we can go further and define it but I have never seen a situation where it was a "have to" to live. I would verture to bet that in almost all situation the urge comes from a need for sexualality and stimulation to what ever degree, I have found it true that at my age the big "O" is not always the climax to stimulation, a pysical act is not even called for except the touching and feel of the clothes and application of makeup, sometimes and most for me is just relaxation and be able to escape the problems and worries of the moment. Recess, if you will! But for the new beginners it is more intense, I would lay odds on it if the truth could be revealed in each case.

[AllyCDTV]

I've seen a few of the studies discussing the biochemical link to it and I feel it has some general validity. Stress and the social environment probably also come into play. All of these contain a wide variety of variables and what combination works to influence one to crossdress is surely different for all individuals. A big factor for me and one that I see rarely discussed is that I have always been aroused by blonds with bangs and big boobs so I created one to look at in the mirror and get off on. Sorry not very scientific and high minded but it works for me.

[DebbieL]

I know this question is old and tired for some, but after many years of dressing it still fascinates and eludes me....Is anyone aware of any credible studies or articles on what causes the urge to dress, or of any theories that actually make sense?

This has been a question for at least 8,000 years. India has hjira, men/women who are believed to be both male and female. The god Brahma is often depicted with 4 faces, one of which is a woman. Transsexualism is probably almost as old as when women focused on gathering and men focused on hunting. Weaker males often stayed home with the women, learned to gather, learned herbs, learned medicine, learned to cook, and learned "magic". Native Americans often considered transsexuals to be two-spirit people who became healers, wise men, and guides. In many northern civilizations, women were warriors, and effeminate men became wizards.

It was spread of Islam, and the Christian imitation of Islamic morality that promoted the concept of gender conformity.

About 1 in 100 children are born with sexual ambiguity, sometimes called "intersexed", born with visibly different parts, including smaller than normal penis, un-descended testicles, girl with larger than normal vulva and/or clitoris. About 1 in 10 children are born with secondary characteristics - males with index fingers longer than their ring fingers, females with ring fingers longer than their index fingers. Cat scans on these children when they are older often show an underdeveloped limbic system in males, and and larger limbic system in females.

20th century society is more tolerant of more masculine women. Perhaps the World War II experiences of Rosie the Riveter made those of that era who became parents after the war. Among the baby boomers, about 1 in 5 girls was a "tom-boy" and about 1 in 6 boys was a "sissy" in first grade. By third grade, the MtF boys had learned to live in stealth mode, often to avoid not only persecution of the other boys, but also of fathers who had served in the military during WW II and had a very dim view of 4Fs, and other "draft dodgers" who stayed home during the war. Girls on the other hand, were given permission to wear pants, at first after school and week-ends, but by the late 1960s, most schools were allowing girls to wear pants and baggy shirts to school. By the 1970s, women were wearing pants to school, church, almost anywhere. By the mid 1970s, the style was "unisex" - but with the emphasis on letting girls dress more like boys.

On the other hand, boys were forced into their male gender roles, often violently. In elementary school, they were often bullied as "sissies", in Junior high, they were mislabeled as "queer", "fairy", "faggot" and other terms for homosexuals. Since they were living in stealth mode, trying to avoid these labels, they often buried their own feelings and desires. As young children, they could wish a magical transformation, Disney movies showed them frogs who turned to princes, Cinderella becoming a princess, Beasts who became princes, on Gilligan's Island a machine transferred the minds of the characters into the bodies of the other characters. Even Star Trek had an episode where Captain Kirk's conciousness was transferred into the body of a woman.

By puberty, however, sex education classes explained to them the differences between genders. Then came the predictable changes of puberty. As voices dropped, hair grew, and muscles formed, hope was lost. For many, even the possibility of a sex change like the one Christine Jorgensen had seemed impossible. It was too late. Many tried to commit suicide. Many succeeded in killing themselves. Other turned to drugs, alcohol, fighting, and high risk behaviors. They die in accidents, fights, or at the hands of homophobic bigots.

Almost anywhere in the cycle, the young by tried cross-dressing. Initially, it might be just a desire to see what it's like to be a girl, or it might be the desire to actually become a girl. At the same time, the intense fear of being labeled, being discovered, being targeted, can trigger both transsexuals and cross-dressers to go into deep stealth mode. Often, the only remnant of their feminine desires is the desire to cross-dress. Other desires, such as social activities, become more acceptable as they begin dating, socializing with women in later high school, college, and in career.

For many of us, it's like being a Jew in Nazi Germany. We become so adept and keeping our secrets, hiding our stash, playing numerous different roles, depending on who we are with, becoming adept "social chameleons", that we can become almost anything and anyone, except ourselves. We even deny our desires. We have lost hope that we could ever become the beautiful girls we wanted to be. We look at women in beautiful outfits and we know we can't BE those women, the best we can do is wear the clothes. For those of us who have large Adam's apples, who have grown too tall, and can only wear plus sizes because our chests and shoulders have grown too large, even the possibility of living as a woman seems beyond our hopes.

This is a time of wondering and despair. We find our secret times and places, where we can put on a sexy outfit and wonder what it would be like to be a beautiful girl, to go to a prom, or a dance, or even be a bridesmaid at wedding, or even to be the bride. Then we are confronted by the realities of our reflection in the mirror, the picture that gives us away. A carefully posed picture might give us the illusion, but we know that we can't go out and pass as beautiful women. Still, for the few hours we can dress, we have the fantasy of being a woman, being seduced by a man or woman who will seduce us as beautiful, sexy, desirable creatures who are wanted and loved for who we are.

But as the time for dressing ends, the despair returns. The loss, the knowledge of a hope that can never be fulfilled, a wish that can never be granted, slaps us in the face. We go back to our masquerade, and we do our best to enjoy our lives as men as much as we can. If our wives dress more masculine, we may even resent their ability to cross-dress in public. If they dress very feminine, we may find ourselves struggling with envy and jealousy, wishing we could be as beautiful as they are. We do everything we can to live and conform to our male gender roles, to survive. Our careers, our families, our marriages, our standing in the community, depends on our ability to maintain the facade.


Mainly, I know I just love it and would find it miserable to live without my feminine things...and yes, the reasons may vary by individual...still I wonder if there is not some common element....

There is a question on a "Gender test" that I find very interesting.

I have a magic wand. It can turn you into a man or woman, at will. If I change you into a woman, you will immediately have a family, friends, and career that you love just as much as your current family, friends, and career. If you get changed into a man, you will continue to be a man, and won't ever be able to cross-dress again. Would you:
1 - Change into a woman and give the wand back?
2 - Change into a man and give the wand back?
3 - Change into a woman and keep the wand so you could change back and forth depending on the time of day?

Keep in mind that as a woman, you don't HAVE to dress up all the time. You could wear pants, flats, and baggy sweaters when you don't feel like wearing skirt, heels, and tight top. If you wanted.

Which would you choose?

Is it possible that 1 in 5 boys who started out as sissies, and 1 in 10 who survived to become adults - are still transsexual?
Could it be that claiming to be cross-dressers is our way of accepting an otherwise unacceptable situation?

[Jenny Gurl]

I don't know exactly what causes it, but I know in me it was nature and not nurture. I was born with a feminine side, it was not a choice or anything that happened to me in my childhood. I remember as far back as Kindergarten being more comfortable around the girls, and wishing it was acceptable for me to dress like they did. Expressing a creative person within me with clothing, hair, and makeup was something I longed for but quickly found it was socially unacceptable and something to keep hidden. I hope someday they do find the TG Gene so it will be confirmed that it is something that a person has no choice in and they may be able to express themselves without fear of being persecuted. When I see these brave crossdressers here breaking down the social barriers by going out into public and changing the way we are perceived by the public it makes me proud. I have read accounts of outings of many here and it makes so happy to see so many people blazing a path for future generations. I hope some day we are accepted for who we are and not the stereotypical way we are suppose to look and act based on our sex.

[Jeannie]

Nothing in particular causes the urge to dress, I just like to do it. I am very fortunate to have a wife that goes along with it and helps me. I am also retired and sometimes I have nothing better to do so getting my girly on is it.

[Jilmac]

I believe it's something hard wired into our system, and we'reborn with it. The urge might manifest itself at different ages in all of us but it's there from the begining of life. I too, thoroughly enjoy my feminine side and would feel incomplete without it. For me, the urge manifested itself at around age seven and will be with me until my carcass is being covered with dirt.

[Annette Anderson]

IMHO The subconscious mind is always working and fully aware.The rational mind more or less is an interface between us and are environment.We might not even be aware of the real "triggers".

[LaraPeterson]

I can, therefore I do.

[Annette Anderson]

IMHO The subconscious mind is always working and fully aware.The rational mind more or less is an interface between us and are environment.We might not even be aware of the real "triggers".

[DeeArel]

I have analized myself extensively on this subject and am finally at peace with myself. For a short and sweet answer, it feels good physically and makes me feel wonderfull mentally and emotionally.

If you want the how and why all this became to be, I will respond to a PM request.

[Wildaboutheels]

Only ONE thing is a given for CDers. Every single one is unique.

And certainly some, are simply born in the wrong body.

Others might have been raised with a bunch of sisters who got all or most of mom or dad's attention. Or raised solely by their moms with never a male or father figure around. And undoubtedly, FEMALES of any age do get more attention and are far more likely to receive compliments than are Males.

Also I don't think any SANE person could fail to recognise that females in general and "attractive" females in particular have a certain POWER over most men, simply because of a man's prime directive. And even "average" looking women can be sharp enough to choose the "RIGHT" clothes, and choose a good hairstyle and color for her face, become skillful enough with makeup etc. to transform themselves into "attractive". Women don't spend all this time and effort because they enjoy it. They do it because they have to. Certainly there are men that are envious of this "power" that women have and would like to have it themselves???

Way too many other [possibly] contributing factors to type out.

"...still I wonder if there is not some common element...."?

I think if you simply read the answers to the most popular threads, that come up over and over and pay attention to the photo gallery, there is no mystery to it at all, and the common element is undeniable.

The glue that binds most all CDers [MtF] is our vision and HOW the male brain operates because of his vision. Evolution has done a great job as usual. Our vision is what enables us men to fulfill our "prime directive" at a moment's notice.

Just ask yourself one Q. How do you stop [most] male CDers? Take away his camera or his mirrors. The big O is all powerful and what keeps the Human race going. It does not matter HOW one gets to the promised land so I find it sad that so many at this Forum feel such shame and guilt about it for so many years.

[GroovyChristy]

As some of you have suggested, I imagine it is a fetish for many of us. Some men may not currently be able to find a woman to be with, so they do the next best thing and create that woman for themselves, or they may enjoy it for other sexual reasons.

But I can only really speak for my own experience. While I do get some arousal out of wearing women's clothing, I also get great peace and comfort that I am unable to find elsewhere. I believe this is because women's clothing expresses who I am better than men's clothing. When I put my panties, leggings, etc. on, it feels like coming home. I think there are aspects of femininity and masculinity in the spirit of each person, but one usually is more prominent and for me that is the feminine. When I put on female clothing, it can be a spiritual experience which is as powerful and affirming as many church events I've been to. I feel right with myself and with the higher power that I believe in.

There are probably many more reasons that people do this, and I don't necessarily think that any is more valid than another. We are all brave for exploring the sides of ourselves which are not widely accepted by society.

[cassexy]

well for me, i love to be a female first, next i find female clothes are more softish, colourful, appealing and i love being in them. i love the different ways of dressing and love being in the softness, different varities,different types of dresses, lingerie, make up, wigs etc. i simply love to be in them. maybe my fetish of not being a female is some what mitigated by this

[adrienner99]

Wildaboutheels--If you do not feel some shame and guilt, I wonder why we cannot see your lovely face in your avatar?

[Lvjim]

I am feminine and the most comfortable
in skirts and panties
I dress in mens clothes for work etc
For me nothing really triggers my dressing
I go for as feminine as i can get away with
in the situation i am in

[Sarah L]

Crossdressing is only "odd" or whatever because of society's idea of what is and isn't appropriate for people to wear. Nothing in nature says that skirts are for women and pants are for men. I believe that most crossdressers like to wear a dress (or any other article of women's clothing) for the same reason a woman would like to.
It appeals to one's tastes. That's all it is.

Our excitement probably comes from the fact that most of us had few opportunities to dress when we were growing up. Let's say two people live across from each other. Tomorrow, they both walk out their door wearing a dress. One is a female who works in an office. The other is a crossdresser going out the door for the first time. It only makes sense that the crossdresser would be excited (and nervous) while the female might not give it much thought.

I am generalizing, but I think there is alot of truth in this.

[NicoleScott]

We are all recycled star dust.

If that's true, I should have a heavenly body. Maybe I didn't get enough star dust.

[AltairaMorbius]

It has always been there. I believe my earliest expression of it came when I was around 6 and told my mother I’d rather be a girl. Biologically my Mother had severe food poisoning in the last trimester of her pregnancy with me. I have read studies of mothers who were under stress during pregnancy that have lead to higher rates of gay male children, i tculd extend this to crossdressing.

Cheers,
Amy

[Naomi Newman]

To me crossdressing is normal, its the outside that reject it, which is odd, because 2000 years ago we were all wearing nothing, its just excuse the phrase "mans ideal" behaviour thats things are like they are, which is all down to education and social backgrounds

[Karen Corona]

I just like being pretty and I'm still capable of doing it.

[Meg East]

I might be in the minority here, but I why does it really matter? How many wonder why they like the arts or sports?
I enjoy it and don't plan on stopping anytime soon. Where did I leave my glass of wine?

I agree. Why waste time finding the why. Every "professional" or "expert" has his or her training based bias which shows up in their opinions.

Both my crossdressing and my wine make me happy.

[Ambrosia]

My urge is to feel feminine wit h a great make up session, my favorite wig and a great dress.

[sometimes_miss]

<snip>Is it possible that 1 in 5 boys who started out as sissies, and 1 in 10 who survived to become adults - are still transsexual?
Could it be that claiming to be cross-dressers is our way of accepting an otherwise unacceptable situation?
Sure it could, if that's really what they were in the first place. I'm sure that there are also lots of homosexual men who have buried their desires so far due to societal disapproval that they need to identify as 'just crossdressers' as well.
Just from reading the forums here, I can tell that there are lots of us who still aren't sure of who or what we are, because there's often more going on than just wearing the clothes.

The gender test question; since it's a magic wand, I'm surprised that we only have three options, since none of those three fit what I need; if the wand is going to turn me into an old lady, no thanks, that's no better than being a crossdressing old man.

[CassandraSmith]

To me crossdressing is normal, its the outside that reject it, which is odd, because 2000 years ago we were all wearing nothing, its just excuse the phrase "mans ideal" behavior that's things are like they are, which is all down to education and social backgrounds

Speak for yourself Kimosabe ;-) (http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Kimosabe)

Actually, 2000 years ago, people were just as concerned about what they were wearing as now; however, you probably would have been burned at the stake for wearing a T-Shirt because only something with a demon (the demon of Spandex) could be stretched over your head and then fit tightly on the body! I shudder to think of the social upheaval a pair of Nike's might make then too.

[meri]

(This is written from a male perspective for M->F CD's)

I have also wondered why are we attracted to women at all? Why do so many of us want to make love to them? I believe it's all connected...

I think it all boils down to we are "half, not whole". We crave physical contact and love making with women because deep down inside, we are incomplete. We have our "masculinity" in abundance, but have suppressed anything feminine in our selves. This is due to hormones and culture. Hence, we are attracted, pulled, we "yearn" for the feminine.

There are several ways to satisfy that yearning. Making love with a woman certainly goes a long way, but it doesn't last very long. Dressing brings the experience even closer, more personal and stimulates us to more directly experience the feminine in our lives. Or perhaps, release the suppressed and hidden feminine that is already within. It is a less "intensive" experience, but it is longer lasting. It lasts as long as you are dressed.

Many of us identify as transgender, sort of a "mixture" of both genders biased in one direction or the other, but definitely somewhere near the middle. I for one, consider this to be the perfect, balanced human being. From a human race "survival" standpoint, it's probably a good thing that there aren't too many of these "perfectly balanced" human beings around, it might have an impact on world population. We could potentially put ourselves out of business. Of course, we don't have to worry about any such outcome for a long, long, long time.

[ClosetED]

Each has a theory, but there are no known answers. It may be different for everyone or a few common themes. But to lighten things up, I was discussing with therapist why I do it, and it may have to do with being under so much desire to excel and being so capable, that I feel like Superman who can't ask for help and my wife equates me with Jesus, the only man who was perfect. But Superman wears tights and Jesus wears flowing gowns, so that must be it! :heehee:

[CynthiaD]

... no one would choose to be a cross dresser.

Why not? I love being a Crossdresser! Why would I choose to be anything else?

[Acastina]

I also think there is some psychological stimulus as well and that probably varies with the individual. Hormones would certainly explain the "older beginning CD" . There is likely some hormonal causes when the fetal brain gets masculinized as it may NOT get enough testosterone and retain some characteristics of the female brain. Female fetuses need no hormonal changes to become female. It doesn't have to be genetic necessarily. There are lots of switches that turn on and off the genes and they can get fouled up--blue eyes is a good example.

Sometimes Miss, above, describes a good example of a psychological stimulus, in the form of childhood trauma, but such stories are the exception to what is otherwise quite mysterious. The rest of this paragraph hits closer to the mark.

A lot of people don't understand that all fertilized eggs are female by default, other than the presence of XX or XY chromosome configurations (or rare variants), and that XY males have to undergo a complex process of differentiation during gestation. Given the complexity of the human organism, obviously a lot can go slightly or greatly amiss in the process. The best theorizing I've seen (best because it answers the most questions without inherent contradictions) is that what we call sexual orientation and gender identity are formed at distinct, relatively early phases of development and rely on precisely timed and dosed infusions of hormones from the mother to program the developing brain. Get the timing or dosage off a bit, and the brain gets "miswired" in some way or another. The abundance of possible combinations of such mistakes would explain the wide variety of gender-variant behaviors we know, from hyper-masculine gay men to lipstick lesbians to straight crossdressers to full-blown TS surgical candidates.

Of course, empirical proof is elusive, because it would require experimenting with fetal development and seeing if the results supported the theories case by case, and the "brain sex" argument was and is controversial. But if one is looking for a tight theory that answers the basic questions well, this is it.



I read a recent paper that suggests being gay IS NOT genetic as it would eventually die out since there would be no reproduction among gays but history does show us that some gays to marry, have families and thus may pass along some predisposition. Another study with quite a bit of proof shows that women who bear a lot of children a more likely than not to produce gay sons in that or other generations , so great great grandma who had 10 kids is likely to have produced some gay children. So, we could also be within that spectrum--not necessarily gay but feminine in some part of out psyche. Gay may represent the ultimate feminization of the male fetal brain, and lesbian may represent the ultimate masculinization of the female fetal brain..

It's not so much a question of being "genetic", as the fetal-development theory outlined above could include such non-genetic factors as an expectant mother's illness, injury, medications, nutrition, and other things that could cause endrocrinological abnormalities during pregnancy. The theory that gays would die off over time is really pretty simple-minded, since, as you point out, plenty of children have been fathered by gay men living in denial.

The second-and-later-sons study is intriguing, and it tends to support the fetal-hormone theory, since the strain of multiple pregnancies could easily affect the endocrine systems of some mothers and cause those timing/dosage issues in subsequent pregnancies.

[Joanne.England]

Maybe, just maybe - it is caused by society itself. clothing is not natually specific to a sex. Wearing a short skirt in summer is a good way to help to keep cool. wearing tights under other clothes is a good way to keep warm. Wearing a bra with padding / forms is a way of being able to look similar to those we want to be with (fitting in) or desire. I've just undone my bra. What a relief!!!.

[MissTee]

I have to admit I don't ponder it much. I just enjoying doing it. My wife, though, has a theory. She says because I'm a "creative" (artist, writer, et al) and have an appreciate for color and beauty -- yet I make my living as an engineer -- dressing, then, gives me the creative outlet the inner me desperately craves. She says it's like when you've gone without water for a long time, and you don't drink any, then the craving get stronger until you give in.

"Hmmm. Yeah, that's it," I say.

[JenniferR771]

I agree with Busker, mostly. Crossdressing is not genetic as it would run in families and be double present in twins. Perhaps epigenetics could explain crossdressing.

I feel that crossdressing begins before birth and perhaps is a result of incomplete masculinization of the early fetus' brain (hypothalamus). Perhaps it is a mild form of transexualism. If crossdressers are different from transexuals...then there should be examples of transexuals who are crossdressers...and examples of transexuals who are not crossdressers. CD, TS, both or neither.

[phelicia]

Now I CD because it makes me feel good. I like to feel pretty and feel like a woman, not that I really know what a GG feels but I like to imagine it. It took me years to figure out why I started to CD in the first place, for me it was rejection from girls, after being rejected from girls over and over I started wearing my mothers clothes, I wanted a gf so I created one, I was the girl.

[busker]

I agree with Busker, mostly. Crossdressing is not genetic as it would run in families and be double present in twins. Perhaps epigenetics could explain crossdressing.

I feel that crossdressing begins before birth and perhaps is a result of incomplete masculinization of the early fetus' brain (hypothalamus). Perhaps it is a mild form of transexualism. If crossdressers are different from transexuals...then there should be examples of transexuals who are crossdressers...and examples of transexuals who are not crossdressers. CD, TS, both or neither.

Jennifer, I read of a study that looked for illness occurrence in identical twins and the conclusion of the study was that only about 12% get the same disease.
What keeps me on the line of thinking about body chemistry is that being a CD occurs world wide, so it lets out local influences and family influences which is unknowingly based on Lamarck's ideas: "Lamarckism is the idea that an organism can pass on characteristics that it acquired during its lifetime to its offspring."
familial influence theory has been --obviously--discredited as an evolutionary theory. Perhaps some people don' like the idea because it takes them out of the loop--they had nothing to do with being a CD--they are "just following (biological) orders". well, we do that anyway, but I think that CDs make this special in their lives and to be sort of a puppet to nature is a little disheartening. As I pointed out, there are musical prodigies, math whizzes and all sorts of children born into ordinary families, and they generally follow their "star". Some eventually become just "ordinary " people but most excel within their gift area. The value of this being chemical in nature is that it IS the answer that we can provide that seems to support "we don't know" and supports the "I yam what I yam" crowd to boot, and the frequency world wide indicates that we are indeed NOT ALONE.

[VickiTheGamer]

I started when I was really young and find it to be exhilarating, but I have found the URGE to do so a great deal stronger when certain circumstances are in effect. I find I like being a male and female, but chose to live as a male and my CD interests have stayed behind closed doors. As for the circumstances that urge me to dress MORE often, they are.

When Single:
If I have not been out on a date in a long time
If I am dating but I don't have sex at all with her
If the women I date might be sexual BUT she is not very Feminine (may not dress feminine, or her behavior is too masculine to find her to be as attractive as she might be otherwise to me. Any number of ideas that could portray a lack of femininity on this one).

When I have a Girl Friend (how it is currently for me):
I found the urge is greater the longer we go without having sex (many many months now)
I also found that I really like "sexy" looks and if my GF chooses not to be sexy much, I tend to want it and start to do it myself. It's like wanting to dress her up, but there isn't any way in hell she will dress the way I want her to, so, instead I do.

It's like, the less I am around a sexy (and sexually active) women, the more I desire dressing up.

When younger, (5 years old up to puberty), I found I dressed because it felt good. Once I hit puberty, I found it as a sexual release. Now that I am older, it is one, the other, or both. Sometimes I dress up and get excited and masturbate, other times I dress up and just feel good and hang around the house all day (not a work day of course) doing what ever. No urge to masturbate or anything.

[missmars]

For internal pease

[FrillyShelly]

What causes the urge to Crossdress ??? The answer to that is easy - SATIN !!!

[busker]

I started when I was really young and find it to be exhilarating, but I have found the URGE to do so a great deal stronger when certain circumstances are in effect. I find I like being a male and female, but chose to live as a male and my CD interests have stayed behind closed doors. As for the circumstances that urge me to dress MORE often, they are.

When Single:
If I have not been out on a date in a long time
If I am dating but I don't have sex at all with her
If the women I date might be sexual BUT she is not very Feminine (may not dress feminine, or her behavior is too masculine to find her to be as attractive as she might be otherwise to me. Any number of ideas that could portray a lack of femininity on this one).

When I have a Girl Friend (how it is currently for me):
I found the urge is greater the longer we go without having sex (many many months now)
I also found that I really like "sexy" looks and if my GF chooses not to be sexy much, I tend to want it and start to do it myself. It's like wanting to dress her up, but there isn't any way in hell she will dress the way I want her to, so, instead I do.

It's like, the less I am around a sexy (and sexually active) women, the more I desire dressing up.

When younger, (5 years old up to puberty), I found I dressed because it felt good. Once I hit puberty, I found it as a sexual release. Now that I am older, it is one, the other, or both. Sometimes I dress up and get excited and masturbate, other times I dress up and just feel good and hang around the house all day (not a work day of course) doing what ever. No urge to masturbate or anything.

This may actually be a mistake to think that dressing and masturbation are on an equal footing here. Puberty is the TIME we get sexual urges, get the urge to flog the dog because NATURE is pushing us to become sexually mature. We may be combining the fact that we have on panties and are now masturbating and thus we have cause and effect when in reality, the 2 things may not be connected at all---just in our own minds. Other kids at 12 masturbate but don't wear panties, so it makes sense that the 2 things don't necesssarily go together. However, if one makes the association that wearing panties causes us to masturbate, then we will probably always have that k\l ink in our minds. The shame that some feel may be realy due to MASTURBATION--not panties.

[MssHyde]

good input here! I'm sure many think the desire is spiritual as well, my wife thinks I need to rebuke satan away.

I told her thats not the reason, I have felt the pull all my life. (It does give me a inner high though)

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Adrienner, It's just who we are and it's just what we do.

[Leila Be]

To feel what I otherwise don't feel. An alternative comfort zone. That feels good.

[Nichola]

Genetics is an underlying theme and/or ingredient throughout the professions. Another ingredient needed is a trigger. The long or short fuse which ignites the inborn disposition and proclivity to crossdress. Multitudes of events, persons, and physiological events can trigger our genetic behavior, no matter how long the dormancy. So we are indeed varied when tasked to come up with a valid reason.


This is how I feel Teresa, I do think it could it could be genetics & there was certainly a trigger point for me at a very early age.

[Jeanna]

"The cause of the urge crossdress" I crossdress every day in men's clothing because I have too (work,play, social stuff). I dress normally when I get the chance.

[Ariel111]

For me it's two-fold, sticking it to society and rejecting the norms and being able to feel and let out the feminine side. My wife loves the fem side because I'm more open and emotional. It's a balance that is much needed.

[CassandraSmith]

Jeanna,

LOL! That was the best response I've ever seen.

[Stefanie Miller]

No idea but having been dressing since mid teens and now mid 50's I accept it as part of who I am. And having my wife accept it makes life that much better. She has said it makes me happy and that is good enough for her. I am one very lucky person.

[Alice Torn]

I really do not know why. I know i was picked on and ridiculed by boys in school, and by brothers at home. I wet the bed until 20. I joined the Air Force, to prove i was a man, to my brothers. I seldomed talked to girls, because i was shy, afraid, and felt unworthy to talk to them I saw later, after i started experimenting with my sister's and mom's clothes, that the Bible condemned crossdressing, in Deut 22:5. So, my like has been dominated by fear, guilt, and shame, and at 58, still is. However, i accept this vice i have more, now, and just try to keep it under control, as an older odd single man.

[Diversity]

It's a good question, and one which I try to understand everytime the urge hits me, which is becoming ever stronger and more frequent. I just enjoy wearing women's clothes. Why? I just don't know.....
Di

[April_Ligeia]

I look at makeup and women's clothes and just want it. Life would be simpler if I knew why. Actually, life would be simpler if it were socially acceptable.

[larissa-laurie]

I think it might have something to do with some form of sexual desire. When I was 13 and my sister dressed me up totally girly from nylons to a wig with makeup and jewelry for an evening, I slowly felt the stimulation and arrousal for the bedroom. I asked her for two nights after that and she dressed me up saying I made a good looking girl and I should go to school with her to the all girls school. I really wanted to fulfill fantasy after fantasy and it was difficult when dressing was not possible. Usually my feminine dressing ended up leading towards sexual fulfillment if even in the mind only.

[prene]

Just seems natural for me.

I just wish I had the 100% original female body

[PaulaQ]

I think it might have something to do with some form of sexual desire.

I used to think this was the case for me, and I suppose it still is to some degree. I think it started out that way, when I was young, and this disturbed me. But I've noticed lately that this isn't always the case anymore, and that sometimes, it just feels more normal. Part of me finds that more disturbing, to be honest.

[Karencd37]

I might be in the minority here, but I why does it really matter? How many wonder why they like the arts or sports?
I enjoy it and don't plan on stopping anytime soon. Where did I leave my glass of wine?

A perfect response. It doesn't matter. As a youth it was a concern for me....(why am I different?) Then, when I discovered I wasn't alone, I relaxed and enjoyed both sides of me - my male life and my female side. I don't want to become a woman,or wish I was female (Not that there's anything wrong with that.) I just enjoy the times I have to bring out and express my feminine desires. I think the hard part is many of us need to keep this special part of our personality concealed for one reason or another.