Intimacy while dressed

[Amberhea]

I don't know about the rest of you but I am a very lucky girl in that my wife doesn't mind if I wear my lingerie while we are intimate. It is one of the great pleasures of my life and something I had fantasized about quite often when I was younger. It's not like me wearing lingerie turns her on but she knows it turns me on. Most of the time I wear thigh highs and either a bustier, bra, or nighty which inevitably comes off but my thigh highs stay on. I've been dropping hints I'd like to get some heels to wear to add to our intimacy and am hoping she will let me get some eventually, it's not that i'm pushing for it but just letting her know of my desire. I am not a full blown CD, but dress just down below, always panties, and recently painting my toenails and wearing leggings at home. I was just wondering about the rest. Does your wife allow you to wear lingerie or does she get turned on by you wearing or not allow it?

[Jenniferathome]

I never want to bring my cross dressing into the bed room. It's not about sexual stimulation for me. But moreover, I know my wife would not appreciate it. Even if I wanted it, I would never suggest it to my wife because SHE deserves her husband in bed.

[Ann Louise]

We have a great time in bed while I'm dressed Amberhea. We both love it!

[racquelr]

My wife doesn't get aroused seeing me dressed, but is okay with being intimate while I'm dressed. It's definitely something I really enjoy.
Actually, it was an encounter a couple years ago when she had me put on her lingerie while we were fooling around that gave me the courage to "come out" again about my desire to cross-dress.
It had come up before about 20 years ago, but then it went back into the closet for a while.
Now it's completely out in the open and while it's still not something she fully understands, she accepts and tolerates it.
When we are intimate while I'm dressed, I do tend to take on a more feminine role and tend to be more gentle and passionate, while she often takes on a more dominant role.
It's definitely a nice change of pace!

[AmyGaleRT]

That would be a big no-no with my fiancee. She wants her man in bed with her, and won't even let me wear nightgowns to bed for sleeping. She does, however, let me wear them around the house for relaxation, much as she herself does.

- Amy

[Diversity]

I wish mine did, but no, she is not at all wanting to be a part of me crossdressed. Count your blessings and good luck to you both.
Di

[Imeni]

I don't... understand. Now, for me anyways, I don't become some other person while dressed. I am me, I will always BE me, but... as far as it goes to make your wife happy, you also need to be aware that there are in fact two people in that relationship. So while you don't think she would like it, do you? Shouldn't there be some common ground? Maybe im just young and nieve but alot of what I've read so far doesn't really make alot of sense.

[VanIsle]

We both enjoy it very much :)

[andrea lace]

I have only told my wife about my CDing just recently and yes it has affected our sex life for the better.

[Ciara Brianne]

My ex-wife and I have been intimate while I have been dressed on several occasions. It is super exciting to me. she wasn't as crazy about it as I, but she loved the way it made me squirm and the affect my heightened arousal had on her. She liked it for variety in the bedroom too.

[Erica Marie]

Being single I may not have alot of input on this subject. But Im thinking the best would be to have your SO's support or consent or she is just doing it "because". If is in not truly enjoyed by both people honest to me its not worth it.

[MsJanessa]

If both (or more) partners are into it, there is nothing more exciting for me

[KatieGG]

He doesn't like to bring it into the bed room, I don't mind either way. The only time it happens is if he was already dressed and things just kind of happen and most of those times we didn't make it to the bedroom ;) Sometimes I kind of like to feel both our lip gloss while kissing and a skirt makes it easy to reach....nevermind :o

[SexyErica]

My wife on occasion will even ask if Erica can come out to "play"!!

[Yvonne York]

I don't know about the rest of you but I am a very lucky girl in that my wife doesn't mind if I wear my lingerie while we are intimate. It is one of the great pleasures of my life and something I had fantasized about quite often when I was younger. It's not like me wearing lingerie turns her on but she knows it turns me on. Most of the time I wear thigh highs and either a bustier, bra, or nighty which inevitably comes off but my thigh highs stay on. I've been dropping hints I'd like to get some heels to wear to add to our intimacy and am hoping she will let me get some eventually, it's not that i'm pushing for it but just letting her know of my desire. I am not a full blown CD, but dress just down below, always panties, and recently painting my toenails and wearing leggings at home. I was just wondering about the rest. Does your wife allow you to wear lingerie or does she get turned on by you wearing or not allow it?

I too am a lucky girl. My wife, although not turned on by my dressing, is fully accepting and allows me to wear lingerie and sexy nighties in bed, and when we are intimate. She refuses to accept me wearing a wig or make up, but I am more than content with what I have. Sometimes I wear my clothes throughout, sometimes she undresses me. The feel of a GG undoing my bra and cupping my boobs is one of the greatest ever pleasures.

[MissTee]

My wife doesn't mind. Years ago, when I first start dressing, it did add to the excitement. Now, it's no different than parting my hair a different way. From a stimulation perspective it does not add to or detract from intimacy for either of us. Besides, "It's just clothes," she says. They usually end up coming off anyway.

[Marleena]

Nope, not in the bedroom for me, she has made it clear. There is no sexual motivation because of clothes anyways. I'm just lucky she puts up with me being trans.

[Danielle_cder]

yep danielle gets to be involved intimately :D

[Kate Simmons]

In my personal case, dressing and intimacy have little or nothing to do with one another.:)

[Beverley Sims]

Dressing and intimacy has little enhancement, in our life as dressing has been there a long time.
Intimacy just happens whenever and whatever situation allows it.

[withasmile]

As cross dressing so far for him is a sexual thing, we definitely bring it into the bedroom. I'm fine with it and it's even more fun sometimes then 'normal' sex, because he is so into it. However; often he is not as good at pleasing me when dressed. That's a bit frustrating.

[racquelr]

For me, there is definitely a sexual component to cross dressing. I get aroused and feel very sensual when I dress.
That definitely carries over in the bedroom.
I have to say I'm lucky that my wife goes along with it - I don't think it's something she is really "into" or is turned on by, but she makes the best of it.
I don't think both partners have to always be getting something out of sex for it to be good sex.
In a long term relationship, I think there has to be some give and take for it to be a successful relationship and for both partners to feel satisfied.
Sex advice columnist Dan Savage refers to this as being GGG - Good, Giving, and Game. More specifically: good in bed, giving equal time and equal pleasure, and game for anything—within reason.
My wife is Giving and Game with going along with being intimate while I'm dressed, and the sex ends up being Good. In return, I make sure that here needs are being met as well. I actually think I tend to be more attentive to her sexual needs when I am dressed.
And even though I may be dressed, my wife still has her husband in bed with her. It's not someone else - it's just me feeling pretty and sexy.

[Mikkigurll]

I too am a lucky girl. My wife, although not turned on by my dressing, is fully accepting and allows me to wear lingerie and sexy nighties in bed, and when we are intimate. She refuses to accept me wearing a wig or make up, but I am more than content with what I have. Sometimes I wear my clothes throughout, sometimes she undresses me. The feel of a GG undoing my bra and cupping my boobs is one of the greatest ever pleasures.

I am somewhat in the same condition.My wife does encourage my crossdressing in and out of the bedroom. We go out in public. The day before yesterday, she ordered herself a couple of new bras and asked me if I wanted some as well. Of course, I said "YES!"

[Fuchsia]

I'm glad that some CD men are lucky enough to enjoy intimacy while Dressed. I dress because it feels good, it arouses me, it feminizises me and I like how I look but it's all a solo experience. I could wish it were otherwise but many aspects of my sexuality are for me alone and dressing is only one of them and that's how it is. We are all lucky to be able to dress to whatever extent is possible and to be intouch with that rich part of ourselves xx

[LilSissyStevie]

In a sense I'm always "en femme" during intimacy because I don't have a clear conception of myself as a man sexually speaking. The thought of it doesn't do much for me. Imagining myself to be female or at least very feminine allows me to be turned on. It really has little to do with the clothes. But I do like the ritual of dressing up for her when she requests it and she requests it because I like it. This isn't a big deal since our sex life is highly unconventional anyway. My junk has only rarely worked well enough to be her "man in the bedroom" and that has only gotten worse as I age. But there is more than one way to "skin a cat" as they say. I get far more enjoyment out of pleasing her than the reverse. I'll take a pill occasionally if that's what she wants. It all works because sometimes she pretends I'm a woman and sometimes I pretend to be a man.

[Christinedreamer]

My ex adored it when I wore a full length peignoir to bed and we had several matching outfits. Back in the 70s you could still find intensely feminine and frilly multi layered sets that drove us both wild. She even asked that I put on more than one as the material softness drove her wild. (it didn't hurt ME any either)

Word of caution though: If you are going to wear a multi layered nylon or satin gown, steer clear of satin sheets unless you have bed rails. The slipping and sliding all over was hilarious and so much fun.

[Maria in heels]

Amber...I too love to be Maria when intimate with my wife. Sometimes she even will hint and just say to me "how is Miss Maria" in the middle of the day, or when she is "hinting" to me. It is a wonderful feeling, and I do enjoy both my male side and being Maria and my wife being passionate with Maria

[SandraInHose]

When my secret was discovered by my wife, I have to give her credit for trying it a few times with me dressed. Unfortunately, it went over like a lead balloon. For the most part, she was repulsed, and that's when she hit me with the questions of how I would feel if she let her leg and armpit hair grow out, put on a fake mustache, and wore male underwear. I guess I had never thought of it that way, but still, I was hoping for the best. Oh well...live and learn.

Once in a while I'll wear crotchless pantyhose, and while she doesn't get anything out of it, she'll at least give me that without much resistance.

[Emma Beth]

Since we began this new level of our relationship when I came out, we have had a couple of opportunities to dress together. I surprisingly find that only while I'm dressed, I really like to see her in her new boxer briefs and she gets a charge out of me in my bra and panties. The intimacy is great, I can't put my finger on what it is just yet, but it has been great.

The other day I just got my first nightie and I can hardly wait till we have an opportunity with me in my new nightie. Especially since the both of us have been really frisky when I put it on for bed.

For the curious, it's a red with pink and white hearts with white lace camisole and matching pantie. The pantie has a scunchie bottom and I lurv the way it gives me a shapely back side

[Amberhea]

Well there have been some really great responses and certainly I'm learning. I guess I should add that for me, lingerie used to be something that was sexualized for me. Now I just feel pretty when I wear and sexy. My wife prefers to go naked which is fine with me, but occassionally she'll wear her thigh highs and a corset, but i like to feel pretty and sexy wearing my own lingerie for her and for myself.

[rachel_rachel]

In the last 13 months i've only worn men's boxer shorts about 10 - 15 times.. The rest i've worn something feminine.
My wife and i have a great sex life, i'm the woman, she's the man..

[Allison2006]

My wife sometimes complains about my wig bothering her if I wear it while we're being intimate. For that reason, I usually take it off, but other than that she has no problem with me dressing fem during intimacy.

[Jessica86]

Seems like there are lots of people who get the chance to. I have been wishing since the day I told my wife that this would happen to us. I know it's all about pleasing your partner, but what a girl likes, a man might not like. For example, my wife loves me in my uniform. I don't really find it that exciting because....I'm in it all the time. I'm used to it. I've done it though. I do tons of things for her that I thought.....I would never do. This is something I have dreamed about, and it's the only bedroom thing I have asked my wife if we could do. I can't think of anything else that I really....want to do. If that makes any sense. Maybe one day I will find out what it's like. You are all so very lucky. I think there is no better way to show they love "YOU" for who you are. You can't ever wake up again and wonder if your wife is accepting of you....

[Stephanie47]

Amen to the satin sheets. We slid around so much that after finishing the intimate acts we had to put the regular sheets over the satin sheets.

And, you and I must be of the same generation. Being married in the early 1970's we spent a lot of time on Saturdays in mid town Manhattan checking out the lingerie in Macy's, Gimbel's and all the other stores from Alexander's on 59th Street down to Macy's on Herald Square. We mostly shopped for my wife, but, we did buy floor length and tee length nylon gowns and peignoirs for me also. The bedroom play also included stockings and garter belts.

All that intimacy with lingerie came to a halt when both, she and I, realized my interest in women's attire was developing out of the fetish realm to cross dressing. Of course, in the 1970's there was no information available on men who liked to wear women's clothing.

Would I like those days to return? Not really! Maybe!


My ex adored it when I wore a full length peignoir to bed and we had several matching outfits. Back in the 70s you could still find intensely feminine and frilly multi layered sets that drove us both wild. She even asked that I put on more than one as the material softness drove her wild. (it didn't hurt ME any either)

Word of caution though: If you are going to wear a multi layered nylon or satin gown, steer clear of satin sheets unless you have bed rails. The slipping and sliding all over was hilarious and so much fun.