Just found out today

[Tammy Nowakowski]

I just found out one of friends just drop a boom on me... That he is MTF
I'm wondering if if should tell him about me or not?

and also do you gals think it is a good idea to bring him in to our family?

tammy

[S. Lisa Smith]

Depends on how good a friend she is. She obviously trusted you, only you can figure out if you can trust her. If you tell her, then yes, bring her in.

[Dawn cd]

I'm sorry. I really don't know what you're asking.

[Alberta_Pat]

Tammy, I would increase her vulnerability before sharing your side of things. Ask to see some pictures.

Invite her someplace where you can share pictures over coffee or what not.

[Barbara Ella]

Tammy, that is one you need to figure out. She trusted you, so you need to ask why she sought you out. Might be good spend some time getting to know exactly what this person is thinking about and what plans they have for their future before you commit yourself to something you can never take back.

If they are serious, they may already be hanging around, never know

Barbara

[Tammy Nowakowski]

I know her for some time we stayed with her family

I had small feeling she was hiding something
i also told her i understand were she is coming from
so i may have let the cat out of the bag as some would say or it may still be in the bag hard to say

[Karen_K]

I think the question about whether to tell any particular person is best answered by considering the question: What benefit will this person derive from knowing? In this case, telling her may help her feel better understood, less isolated. Perhaps she chose to come out to you because she felt she needed to tell a sympathetic person. It of course depends on your comfort level with her too.

[Pythos]

Yes to both, provided on other aspects they are a decent person.

[DebbieL]

Your friend trusted you enough to share her secret, perhaps because she realised you might need an understanding friend. This is a chance for both of you to experience the end of loneliness that only CDs an TSs know. You cant imagine how much it feels to have a friend who knows your secret and still wants to be your friend. You both have so much to gain.

When people know both Debbie and Rex and call me Debbie when I'm in Rex mode, I know they are truly my friend. I'm safe and loved!

[Tammy Nowakowski]

thank you all for all your replys i'll keep an open mind
and again i may have open the box when it told her that i undersatnd were she is coming from
i'm think that she whats to Transition from male to female but i'm not 100% sure
when we stayed with his family i may have left some clues around that i was cding all i wore then was just panties and nightgowns to bed
i'm glade she came out to me
I'll wait for her next reply and i'll update on whats is going on

tammy

[Beverley Sims]

If you eventually open up to her and she transitions you will cement a wonderful relationship with each other I am sure.
Invite her to this forum after you have established a friendship.
Telling her about this forum before coming out means you will have just exposed yourself anyway.

[Tammy Nowakowski]

I'm going to invite her in to our wonderful family here
i feel safe here with everyone
tammy

[mikiSJ]

I am guessing her journey has been a tad more difficult than yours so far, so when/if you feel comfortable to her about you, don't be competitive.

[Genifer Teal]

A co worker knew about me for 8 years before I found out about her. She identified me at a party but I didn't see her. Eventually we met up at another event. Now we are good friends. We worked together on many occasions. She was always very nice to me. She is nice to everyone, so it didn't seem like special treatment. I still bug her how she kept it a secret for so long. Think about how your friend might feel if you wait a long time to tell her.

[Tammy Nowakowski]

i sent an email to her today and see what happens
i'm hoping things will work out for her and i she like 60miles away and we both do not drive and there are no bus in this area
she is vary caring and if it works out i'll see if can have her come in out the cold and join us here

tammy

[Tracii G]

Be supportive and accepting first and if later she asks tell her.
Let her know you will never "out" her.

[DeeDeeB]

If you are ok with her knowing, let her know, and soon. It could be so good for both of you to support each other.

:fairy1:
DeeDee

[Tammy Nowakowski]

I have good news when i told her about me she was shocked, she glad that i'm trusting her with this info and she told me she will not say anything to anyone
she working on Transitioning from male to female, i'm happy for her. She is in a homeless shelter not sure if it is transgender frienly or not so i'm worried for her.