Okay, so I'm sort-of new and looking for advice...

[Rachael Jones]

Since I was about 13-14 I found myself dressing in women's clothes. I liked the sensations, and also the femininity of the experience. Part of it when I was younger was sexual, but as I got older I just became comfortable with wearing. Then, for a long time - I stopped. I thought about it many times, but never acted upon it.

Now I finally succumbed to the urge, and put on some borrowed clothes - a lovely long dress and I felt fabulous, and strangely comfortable again. Considering I have major depressive episodes due to work stress, this was a comfort that surprised me.

I managed to get a couple of shots off before my SO came back from an evening out. Like I said, that part is another topic, another time. The one thing a 12mp DSLR does (Photography is a hobby of mine) is it shows every detail. :sad: So my decisions now are - how far do I want to take this?

A lot of personal reflection - and I came to the fact that I should take it as far as I am comfortable with. There's no real rules as such, right?

But, as an almost complete novice, where do I start? I don't mind going off to another town and hitting some shops - I've done it before. Heck, I even bought underwear in an Ann Summers store, no problems! But do I start amending my body (I do need to lose some weight) or do I start with some of my own clothes, or even get makeup? Argh! Decisions!

And the other main question, apart from where do you start, is trying to define how to make my face feminine. I'm a hairy dude, even on the face, and if I didn't shave twice a day (which I don't always) I would have stubble/beard/forest 24/7. Any advice there would be awesome. :) I've been playing around with GIMP and some webcam shots but getting nowhere.

[Tracii G]

In order to proceed maybe you should come out to your SO and explain your urges.Coming clean is the first move.
She/He is your partner and hiding/sneaking around will only bite you in the backside later on.

[Leah Lynn]

I agree with Tracii. Discuss it with the SO (many threads here on that subject), and go from there. Hiding it will only work if the SO is blind or crippled, because sooner or later a shoe is left out or a package arrives and she opens it, etc. Honesty is the best policy at this point.

Leah

[Rachelakld]

I introduced my then GF to my "little hobby" by showing her one of my classy dresses, before the evening was over, we both had about 5 changes of clothes and ended up naked.
I can get about 5 hours out of a shave and covering foundation, any longer and I'ld have to re-shave and put foundation on again
I use an automatic camera as I get staff at art galleries, museums, shops etc to take some of my photos, and the Canon DSLR would be an issue for most.
Photos on my blog site

[UNDERDRESSER]

Well, i agree that telling the SO is preferable, if you think she will be at least accepting. A lot of women aren't. If you don't think she can handle it, ask yourself, "Can I give it up?" ( most here think you can't long term ) And if you can't give it up, is it worth the stress of hiding, and the near certainty that she will discover it, with all the extra aggravation that being dishonest will cause?

it's a difficult decision, think it through, putting the genie back in the bottle is impossible.

As for how to proceed, do you want to go out? Do you want to try and pass? Do you just want to look good to yourself in pictures? Or just want to enjoy the clothes at home?

[Rachael Jones]

Thanks for the replies. I'm considering my options re telling. Its hard because of fundamental religious issues, and I will leave it at that for now. I am aware of the implications, the aggravation. But I am thinking hard on this.

I'm not intending to go out, just want to look good myself. It would be nice to pass, but not an ambition as such. At the moment, just to look good, feel good and ease in to things. Years of cycling gave me some nice legs, and I have thin arms (not muscular at all). Like to lose the belly flab thought, and dressing gives me a reason

[Beverley Sims]

Welcome to the forum, and you are starting out the same as a lot of us here.
Decisions on just about anything you ask will come after reading many replies to posts.
You will go at your own pace and not too quickly I advise.
One thing you do need is to be honest with your wife, sooner than later.
Grooming and makeup can come later as you proceed down the road.
Shaving just before makeup seems to be what you require at the moment.

[andrea lace]

Imagine being dressed and your SO walks in on you that was a situation I thought of often. Tell your other half if you can. I told mine about a month ago and she was fine with it and has even purchased some outfits shoes and make up for me. I am now dressed and wearing my new wig I don't pass but could never dress and be as comfortable as I am now without telling my wife. Not all SOs are the same as my wife and lots are not as accepting and I guess that I am one of the lucky ones. You will never know until you tell your SO and you might be pleasantly surprised by your SO's reaction.

[Kate Simmons]

Whatever you do Hon, do it in a way that makes the whole experience fun. We have enough "chores" in life. Enjoy the femme time, enjoy the experience and the resulting ROI (return on investment) will be fantastic.:battingeyelashes::)

[Sandra1746]

Also good luck in your journey.

As many others have said, honesty is the best policy but it has to be revealed slowly. There are lots of resources on the web that describe how "religeous objections" can be overcome, in fact the observation that those objections derive from part of a parcel of rules that we would never accept today may be a start. However this needs to be done slowly, very slowly.

Best of luck to you and your SO and do try to enjoy life,
Sandra1746

[Tammy Nowakowski]

I agree with Tracii and the others honesty is the best policy
tammy

[Sophia Frances]

I feel like a bad person saying this, because of what's been written, but before you say anything to your SO I'd first get an understanding of how far you want to take this. I know if she finds out it will be horrible, but if this is something you are only going to dabble in once in a while and she has serious reservations about it....why go down that road.