Accepted

[erica12b]

After reading the post (Feeling pretty) and thinking that the gg might find the cd’s attractive, I was thinking in the world we live in today are bi gg’s (or gay gg’s) not more acceptable than bi (or gay) guys? And it’s the image of a hot gg that can like a guy or another gg that as a society we accept her because society has put the “fem “ image up and we all worship it. Im not good with the written word like some, but here is one of my thoughts.
erica

[Monica Walters]

...are bi gg’s (or gay gg’s) not more acceptable than bi (or gay) guys?

I think in many ways that this is true. One factor is likely that straight guys don't find bisexual or lesbian GG's as threatening as bi/gay guys. If a guy isn't secure in his sexuality, he fears being attracted to another guy. But he can be attracted to a bi/gay GG without fear of losing his "manhood" (not to mention the fetish many guys have about being with two women***).

I know that in my case, as a young teen I was something of a stereotypical "basher" type (not that I actually did anything). I was very confused that I got that same little "tingle" around some guys that I did around girls. Since this wasn't supposed to be happening, I surpressed it and on the outside maintained a macho animosity towards "fags" (not a term I use anymore, though). It took me a long time, as well as help from a good friend in college (a lesbian GG), to come to terms with it.

Or at least that's been my experience.

*** As my lesbian friend told me, that fantasy is bunk, because if two girls are together the guy might as well not be there, as they weren't going to be paying him any attention... :cheeky:

[erica12b]

i tryed the two on one thing once and its hard to do walk talk and chew bubble gum / then do it on a tread mill and type, and wile balanced on a truck doing 6o mile on a moutain road . get my point the girls did not want each other just me and i wanted to be the mocho guy and it was not any thing i tryed to do any more .

[Monica Walters]

Well, my friend was talking about two real lesbians and there is a lot in the way she said it that amused me, so it stuck.

[erica12b]

society has put the “fem “ image up and we all worship it, all , hit me and make me think more

[Kimberly]

I told a mate I was bi, and he said to me later that day, "my opinion of you hasn't changed one bit!" He was very proud of himself.

I don't think there's any general bias. But it's true for most straight guys to have a lesbian fantasy - so bi women feel more appealing.

If it's bi GG's acceptance of CDing you're after, then you're asking the right question!! ;) I came out to a girlfriend a year ago, or so, and she loved this side of me. Turned her, (and me,) on more than anything else we'd ever done!

Ah, those were the days. :D

Anyway, I better move on before this becomes a thread for the Adult Discussion Area.

[Monica Walters]

Kimberly,

You mentioned that you don't think there's a general bias against bi/gay guys. I think that's becoming more so over time, but it depends on where you're located as well as your generation.

I noticed from your profile that you're 19 (oh to be 19 again and know the things I know now!). I think your generation has it a lot better in this regard as society has become more accepting than it was when I was 19.

There's also location. I grew up in a small town in East Texas and it's hard to describe the incredible pressure to conform to the expected "norms." You're expected to toe the line, get a job, get married, and go to church. And then there was my father. I think he must have seen something in me early on, because he was always on me about not being a "sissy," especially with my hair (he required that I keep it short). I now wonder if he wasn't trying to compensate for something, since I've since learned that my half-sister is a lesbian and my sister is also bi. You take all those factors, shake (don't stir), and it all helps explain why for many years I wasn't just in the closet but packed into a box stored on the top shelf at the back. ;) Not that I'm completely out of it yet, but at least I've thrown the box away. A number of people now know about me, but it's not something I broadcast (and my male alter ego is pretty masculine).

Perhaps this all means that things are getting better and that eventually CDing will also be more acceptable. If nothing else, at least you know about yourself and are able to talk about it while you're young. You can go into a relationship with all the cards on the table and hopefully head off any charges that you're lying by keeping secrets.

[Marlena Dahlstrom]

You mentioned that you don't think there's a general bias against bi/gay guys. I think that's becoming more so over time, but it depends on where you're located as well as your generation.

Your mileage may vary depending on where you live, but U.S.-wide there's a variety of surveys that show the younger people are, the greater percentage of them are tolerant toward gays and lesbians. One typical survey here (http://pewforum.org/docs/index.php?DocID=39) (see the chart midway down).

Incidentally, in a recent column Ellen Goodman referred to a survey (source not cited) showing that those who believed homosexuality was innate were vastly more tolerant than those who believed it was an individual choice.

Probably one reason some within the CD/TG/TS community are so obsessed with finding biological roots for our behavior.

(For the record, I think it's probable biology plays a role for some, but all too often I get the sense people are looking for a "it's not my fault" excuse, rather than acting like they deserve respect regardless of why they do it.)

[Monica Walters]

(For the record, I think it's probable biology plays a role for some, but all too often I get the sense people are looking for a "it's not my fault" excuse, rather than acting like they deserve respect regardless of why they do it.)

I think that there's a strong biological component for most people (like I noted above, it seems like none of my siblings is quite "normal"), but I also know that there are others for whom it is actually a choice.

As for the "it's not my fault" excuse, I think people are looking for a reason for why they're the way the are. There's also the idea that if it's not a choice then maybe the people who deride the LBGT community for their "lifestyle choices" wouldn't have an argument any longer. Frankly, knowing these types, I don't think scientific proof of a biological factor would be sufficient to change their minds.

[edited to fix annoying typo]

[Michelle Hart]

Reminds me of.....

"the enemy of my enemy is my friend"


By an large the straight comunity frowns on us. Since we have no "allies" there, we seek out each other for solidarity.The GLBT community I mean.

I see it as kinda an us against them mentality. If you read and listen to the coments from the straight's we need help to be "normal" yet they adimantly refuse to be accepting or educated on the subjuct of our situation. Some of our SO's accept us some do not.

Background, stigma, upbringing, etc. all are factors in how each of us percieve the world around us. Some consider us a threat for whatever reason and some do not. These thing we cannot change. What we can do however is strive to be good role models. Be good husbands, fathers, or friends. These are the things that we have control over.

Every body has things that scare them or cause insecurity or doubt. For us it just seems more amplified in some cases. If a GG has some deep seated Lesbian fantasy she may manifest it in being accepting or atracted to a CD/TG to keep it "sane" so she can still retreat to "I'm normal"

I read once that if you find an image (photo, video, other) arousing and later find out you were decieved by the object of the image there is nothing wrong with you.

Real women were built to be admired. Why be ashamed or hurt if you admire a well crafted copy or immitation?

[Monica Walters]

I read once that if you find an image (photo, video, other) arousing and later find out you were decieved by the object of the image there is nothing wrong with you.

Real women were built to be admired. Why be ashamed or hurt if you admire a well crafted copy or immitation?

I'd agree that being aroused by an image, even if the image is deceptive, simply means that you are aroused by the object portrayed by the image. But I think there will be people who perceive that they've been tricked, and people hate to be tricked. They think it reflects badly on themselves. Then add overtones of homosexuality (i.e. a straight guy being attracted to an MtoF CD), and some (especially if they're insecure) may react badly.

[Michelle Hart]

They think it reflects badly on themselves. Then add overtones of homosexuality (i.e. a straight guy being attracted to an MtoF CD), and some (especially if they're insecure) may react badly.

Very true, therin lies the problem. Those who feel that they have been trivked often forget what they were looking for or at.

Weather it is male beauty or female or a "copy" however good; accept it for what it is. Brad pitt is very atractive........ does that make me gay because I can apreciate his male beauty?? Ofcourse not. I am simply admiring him just as I can admire George S. Patton.

If however it is an intentional deception then yes anger or hostility may be warranted. That seems to be the key. Is the reader/veiwer aware that he/she is dealing with a copy?

We all want a Prad bag but don't mind having a copy if it does the same thing. Should someone see us with it and later discover it is a fake does that justify admonishment......I think not.