hahah i messed with some guy today.

[Nicole Erin]

So here i am at work, leaning against something like i always do cause it is boring there... Thinking about the "good ol days"... ANYways...

Some guy comes up and says "I have been wanting to tell you for a long time how brave you are to work here (said in nice way)..." and I was like "Oh why is that?" and he said something about how people can be blah blah... "don't you know what i am talking about?" I was like "no" and he danced around it a second and said something about how i was going thru a sex change. I started laughing and said, "No I am not, I was born female" and he was all apologetic and walked away with a dumb look on his face. :devil:

Some people detect me and some don't apparently. When they do, I just correct them as if they had mistaken a GG for a TS.

Hey if I cannot pass as well as i like, at least I can lie about things.
See folks, people might think they "know" who you are but if you can confidently lie, people are not normally gonna argue about it.

[DeeArel]

Well done!

However, you probably messed with half the workforce. He got his information somewhere and will take your response back to the source eventually.

[AllieSF]

Well done, but I would appreciate his effort to be nice, awkward as it was.

[Wildaboutheels]

(said in nice way)..." So it "appears" he was courteous and undoubtedly curious? Looks like you had a good opportunity to educate him? But chose not to?

There IS no way for anyone here to know they "passed" just because strangers never batted an eye. Most folks have more important things on their minds than CD busting. I mean... WHY should strangers care?

Unless you are one of the self proclaimed mind readers here, you don't know WHY he asked. Maybe HE is a CD still in the closet and was simply stating he admired your courage?

[Badtranny]

Most folks have more important things on their minds than CD busting. Maybe HE is a CD still in the closet and was simply stating he admired your courage?

Nicole is not a CD. She is in transition and has been living full time for quite awhile now.

[stephNE]

That is pretty funny, imagine the other conversations going on today.

[Traci Elizabeth]

That has not happened to me but you handled it well.

[Anne2345]

LOLOLOLOL!!!! Too funny! Great story!


So it "appears" he was courteous and undoubtedly curious? Looks like you had a good opportunity to educate him? But chose not to?

I know you mean well, but life ain't always about educating people. You gotta have some fun along the way, too. Even if you're the only one in on the fun. ;-)

[Rianna Humble]

Looks like you had a good opportunity to educate him? But chose not to?

Transsexuals should not have to spend their lives apologising for who they are and educating people.

[KellyJameson]

I'm always going to be nervous about men when it comes to being TS so I'm probably over reacting but be careful for your own safety.

I could see this turning out very ugly for you.

From your words he appeared to be trying to be kind,accepting and supportive which is rare in this world from men.

If he knows differently or learns differently you may now end up with an enemy you did not want or need because he will now feel humiliated by you.

I understand the hurt of not being seen "truly" or addressed appropriately but I urge caution in how you treat others if they are not attacking you or intentionally being rude.

Try to be sensitive to the emotional context you find yourself in so that you build goodwill toward yourself by others.

This does not make you weak,passive or cowardly but accepting of others attempts to do the right thing even if they are fumbling in their attempts.

Our world is very difficult for others to understand and I personally try to have compassion for them when I see an effort is being made on their part.

We need all the friends we can get.

[Genifer Teal]

I agree that you should stand up for who you are. I get why you handled it the way you did. I do think you may have lost an opportunity to educate some people who were genuinely reaching out to try to understand us better. You could have basically said the same thing with a little more explanation and it could have gone so much further.

[LeaP]

No-one should EVER feel any obligation to "educate" someone about something so intensely personal. That the guy was trying to be nice is noted, but that doesn't change the personal nature of the comment. It was intrusive and ignorantly rude.

[Nicole Erin]

As one ex-member here advised - one should not talk about being TS. I don't discuss it with anyone except family, close friends, and of course other TG. especially not at work cause once you start talking about it - word gets around and people think it is a pass to start asking their questions like who we sleep with, our old name, start calling us "he", and what is between our legs. It has been brought up at work in the past a couple times. It happens. I blow it off.
I don't even ask my TS sisters about their genitals, who they sleep with, or their male name. NOT my business.

Feeling the need to educate the public is why some TS out there who could otherwise pass without question will always be known as TS instead of women. I salute those TS but I have no desire to educate people.

I mean gyod at work it is bad enough as it is. Some of them insist on calling me by my first name (which is female) instead of by Erin even though that is how I intro myself to everyone. I can imagine the fun they would have if they knew my gender status for SURE or knew my old name.

Wildaboutheels - No I don't know why he asked. I can only assume he was trying to dig up some little piece of dirt about me. I have met some "experts" on TS who of course know one girl that you could never tell it was a guy or they have slept with over 500 TS

Kelly - yeah maybe I did gain some enemy. I do not go to work and ask people to guess my gender. Just because we (TS) exist is not reason for folks to be nosy. I am just there to punch the clock and collect a check. With needing friends - I don't need a lot, just a few good ones which I have. Quality here.

[Kaitlyn Michele]

I think you handled it great ... you handled it in a way that expressed both your own personality and how you felt in that moment...

those that want to educate in these moments i humbly suggest you stop reading...stop typing!!!!!

Get up right now from your keyboard...drive to the local mall and start walking up to people and telling them your story...otherwise you are missing a huge opportunity to educate people to help them understand us better...

[Pokergal420]

I think you handled it great. We don't want to be commended for what we are doing, we just want to be treated as any other female. If that is too much to ask, then don't speak to us. I had a woman at work ask me, how I look so good. I played stupid, and she kept circling around if I had any work done. I was deeply offended. Yes she was complimenting me that I look good, but what she meant is you look good for a man. I just walked away, and other co-workers told her not to address my transgenderism. She later apologized, but only because she thought I would go to HR.

[kimdl93]

I think that's fair. He was so presumptuous, if well intended. You taught him not to jump to conclusions!

[LeaP]

You taught him not to jump to conclusions!

Great point on the "you missed a chance to educate the public" theme. He DID get an education!