Variables in the wide realm of WHY...

[Nikki50/50]

When all of this started for me (still drafting that), I of course researched the subject extensively...
No-one seems to know why males dress as females, as far as a common thread that ties us all together. Each person is different, and has her own reason for it. But what of that unknown common thread? Does it even exist?
I know that more and more of us are "coming out" in increasing numbers. A veritable 'snowball effect'. So I pondered. I ruminated. I thought about it, and at length; came the idea that the reason for why men dress as women is that the comfort femininity brings us may be closely tied to the polar shift of our "world" becoming a Woman's World. Men have had the reigns for a long time, now...and the balance in the War of The Roses is turning. We had a female presidential candidate, recently for instance...
A historic first.
Are we as men becoming more comfortable with our until recently un-nurtured feminine sides, as women become more proliferated among positions and responsibilites that men once held exclusive dominance and monopoly over?
I wonder about it. It behooves me to say I have reached no conclusions either way. I am simply tossing this idea out there, to see where it goes, if it goes at all.
Any thoughts?

[andrea lace]

We still live in a mans world and although females inevitably reach positions of power its still a mans world we live in. As for the reasons why we like to CD. I can only speak for myself. I feel comfortable as Andrea and feel comfortable as my guy self. For me dressing up stimulates the reward center of the brain or so I believe. There is a huge spectrum of people that use this forum and I am sure we all dress for many different reasons. I have only recently told my wife and she is fine with me CDing and I have also pondered this question for quite some time. I think most do it because it feels good to put it simply. Dress and enjoy
Andrea

[Beverley Sims]

The only thing I find is social attitudes are under review all the time and acceptance of our lifestyle is becoming more tolerant.

[Nikki50/50]

We still live in a mans world and although females inevitably reach positions of power its still a mans world we live in. As for the reasons why we like to CD. I can only speak for myself. I feel comfortable as Andrea and feel comfortable as my guy self. For me dressing up stimulates the reward center of the brain or so I believe. There is a huge spectrum of people that use this forum and I am sure we all dress for many different reasons. I have only recently told my wife and she is fine with me CDing and I have also pondered this question for quite some time. I think most do it because it feels good to put it simply. Dress and enjoy
Andrea

Social attitudes have always been subject to scrutiny...and I'm glad for the acceptance...I'm just wondering what is driving it. If the 'why' transcends each of us as individuals having a reason, into a bigger--much bigger--picture unfolding.
And yes it IS still a man's world...but that is changing. I didn't mean to imply that it had changed lol...
Subsequently, our roles and behaviors/mannerisms AS men in this world are changing too. It just seemed (at least to me) too close to dismiss as unrelated without some thought...

[Angela Campbell]

This has been around for ages, but it is usually a well kept secret. It could be that the fairly recent advances in communications such as the internet has brought it to the front and more and more people are finding out they are not alone and are getting more comfortable letting it show. As to why? Well can you explain why one would like dramas over comedies? Or prefer pizza over a steak? It is something we all have that is unique. We all have free will and therefore we have preferences. My only answer as to whY, is Why not?

[Kate Simmons]

It's a tough call and has to do with deep down feelings that we may not even acknowledge. I think sometimes when we see we have what men want, our focus and perspective may change without really realizing it. Our "X" half kicks in and we unconsciously want to look attractive and get attention. Just how far we go with that socially and on the transition scale is different for each person. Once we get a taste of femininity, however, it's hard not to want to continue those feelings.:)

[kimdl93]

We may be coming out in greater numbers, but that reflects societal changes in the degree of acceptance. And I agree that the world is becoming more female-friendly. However, there's an old rule in statistics....correlation does not imply causation. Many...most of us, were cross dressers or transgendered before the changes you mention had taken root. And there are cross dressers in all human cultures, many of which are deeply repressive of gender variants. No, the common thread isn't in the society, it's in ourselves..to very loosely paraphrase the bard.

[Wildaboutheels]

Mother Nature ...aka EVOLUTION. Specifically... MEN'S VISION.

The end.

[AndreaS]

My own personal reasoning for why I dress would be that I just enjoy embracing and experiencing femininity. It's kind of an all-inclusive thing that includes the look and feel of the clothes, the scent of a woman, the attitude, the difference in mannerisms, etc. I enjoy experiencing all of the physical and emotional aspects that dressing and playing the part of a woman brings.

Since I also enjoy a number of things about being a physical male, I guess you could say that I prefer to taste different flavours of ice cream instead of just staying with chocolate or vanilla. Variety is the spice of life, and I want to sample a multitude of different spices. Some spices will be revisited a number of times if they satisfy me more than others. And part of the variety for me is doing more and more things while dressed. Shopping, movies, restaurants, etc. are experienced in a whole new way when you're wearing a skirt and can hear your heels clicking while you walk.

No reason for doing the same boring thing over and over - life is too short for that, in my humble opinion.

[Maria S]

We still live in a mans world....

This may be the case. If so after nearly 50 years being the man perhaps it feels good to be able to take a back seat in life (sorry GGs no offense meant).

I believe I look better, act better and think better in Maria mode. It helps me gain extra confidence. After all if you can walk into a ladies toilet full of females of all ages and confidently do what you have to do and come out with your head held high any thing else seems a doddle.

Since I've been dressing during the day, 5 days a week it has become second nature instead of getting up in the morning going into boy mode having breakfast and then changing to girl mode as if it were a hobby I now get up and go straight into girl mode as any GG would do.

Maria

[Foxglove]

I know that more and more of us are "coming out" in increasing numbers. A veritable 'snowball effect'. So I pondered. I ruminated. I thought about it, and at length; came the idea that the reason for why men dress as women is that the comfort femininity brings us may be closely tied to the polar shift of our "world" becoming a Woman's World.


Sorry, Nikki, I don't really find much in this idea. I'd go along with Kim's analysis.


We may be coming out in greater numbers, but that reflects societal changes in the degree of acceptance. And I agree that the world is becoming more female-friendly. However, there's an old rule in statistics....correlation does not imply causation. Many...most of us, were cross dressers or transgendered before the changes you mention had taken root. And there are cross dressers in all human cultures, many of which are deeply repressive of gender variants. No, the common thread isn't in the society, it's in ourselves..to very loosely paraphrase the bard.

I'd add that the reason more of us are coming out now is that we can afford to. Bit by bit the human race is becoming civilized. There are ideas that are now largely accepted that didn't use to be: universal education of children, universal right to vote, respect for other races and cultures, the horror of slavery, etc. A rising tide lifts all boats. Gradually those of other sexual or gender orientations are gaining acceptance.

One bit of progress that the human race badly needs to make is the outlawing of war. I think I can safely say that there are few people in this world who, after quarreling with a neighbor, would see it as a permissible step to take to break into that neighbor's house and murder all present. Yet far too many people have no trouble condoning invading another country and murdering all present. We need to extend the concept of "neighbor" to inhabitants of other countries.

Annabelle

[DonnaT]

Not picking on anyone, just a basis of thought:

what of that unknown common thread? Does it even exist?
So I pondered. I ruminated. I thought about it, and at length; came the idea that the reason for why men dress as women is that the comfort femininity brings us may be closely tied to the polar shift of our "world" becoming a Woman's World.

Even if that were true (I have no idea) that does not explain why you first desired to cross dress.


I can only speak for myself. I feel comfortable as Andrea and feel comfortable as my guy self. For me dressing up stimulates the reward center of the brain or so I believe.
Again, that does not explain why you first desired to cross dress.

That's the common link that many search for, that initial reason why you first desired to cross dress.

But many never had that desire to cross dress, and it came about by happenstance. Examples: A sister dressed you; for a play; for halloween; role-playing with the wife; etc.

For me, I saw a neighbor girl and boy playing and he was dressed in her clothes. I was about 6 or 7 yrs old. I soooo wanted to be that boy then.

Why?

Was it a stimulation of the reward center of the brain? Maybe, but why!?

Maybe there is a small part of the brain that is Intersexed, male and female, and some trigger causes a synapses of the brain to link the two.

[Nikki50/50]

:D
Alot of good points here...all valid. I do want to reiterate that I do not intend to imply that I am taking or have taken a stance on any of these notions that I have expressed. The idea is there, nothing more. It was more of a question along the lines of of could it be this, or have something to do with it...
I only pose this idea because I have read alot of posts dealing with the whys and wherefores, but none of those I encountered took such a broad vew of a possible larger picture. Maybe the picture doesn't exist. But since I have always been one to question everything (one of my own self-validations that eventually and possibly inevitably led me here), I had to ask. LOL
My views are protean, wildly subject to change, all to get a better perspective of as much as I can.

[I Am Paula]

There's no good science to do with the XY theory, that we're already half female at birth, but it's the best I've got, so I'm sticking with it.- Celeste

[Frédérique]

Are we as men becoming more comfortable with our until recently un-nurtured feminine sides, as women become more proliferated among positions and responsibilities that men once held exclusive dominance and monopoly over?

It seems like that at first glance, but you have to somehow break out of this largely monocular vision of one’s own existence. I mean, I only know what I have seen and experienced during my own lifetime, so I can only comment on that with any degree of certainty. However, there has been a long history of crossdressing throughout the ages, and we are merely the latest version of this continual need to “break out” of our male prison garb. Seen in this context, I feel we are equal to, or slightly less experimental, than previous incarnations of the human race. It’s true that women are more prominent in areas that were once male-only, but, on closer inspection, I see the same gender divide in place, getting wider, not narrower, i.e. society at work...

Looking back, this has always been the case, and now, thanks to revisionist history, the role of women throughout history has gained a new appreciation. Unfortunately, men in touch with their feminine side are hardly ever revered, or even mentioned. To me, I keep thinking that there must have been crossdressers at all times, in all places, simply because it is a natural thing that springs forth in all sorts of environments and situations. This is the foundation we all stand on; even though outsiders cannot, or will not, recognize it. Regardless of the time or place, it seems to me that all men are not created equal, and some men prefer to step away from their expectations, doing something, during their relatively brief existence, that defines rather than confines. This has been going on for a long time, but it’s hard to see past the times we are living in...
:straightface:

[Jaymees22]

It would appear that it's a mans world but it really isn't. I believe women have power over men, it may be a little passive aggressive but they usually get their way. It's been said that one reason men CD is to feel that power, the power that women have over the family and men in general. Feeling powerful? Jaymee

[Sheren Kelly]

the reason for why men dress as women is that the comfort femininity brings us may be closely tied to the polar shift of our "world" becoming a Woman's World. .... Any thoughts?

I recently read the book "The Riddle of Gender" by Deborah Rudacell of Johns Hopkins University. She is a Biologist and in the last third of the book she discusses the proliferation of estrogen and androgen inhibitors in the environment. The increase in instances of transsexualism, and decrease in average sperm counts follows a documented shift in these environmental factors. It may not be the answer for all cases of transgenderism, but perhaps there is some causality to be considered in our changing environment.

[Julogden]

This has been around for ages, but it is usually a well kept secret. It could be that the fairly recent advances in communications such as the internet has brought it to the front and more and more people are finding out they are not alone and are getting more comfortable letting it show. As to why? Well can you explain why one would like dramas over comedies? Or prefer pizza over a steak? It is something we all have that is unique. We all have free will and therefore we have preferences. My only answer as to whY, is Why not?
I think you've hit at least one of the nails on the head. Whereas there have been gay neighborhoods in larger cities for a long time that provided a sense of community and at least some support, there's never been any physical neighborhoods for us. The Internet has provided us with a virtual neighborhood, IMO, and it's led to a snowball effect of people not just coming out to the world but also to themselves.


It seems like that at first glance, but you have to somehow break out of this largely monocular vision of one’s own existence. I mean, I only know what I have seen and experienced during my own lifetime, so I can only comment on that with any degree of certainty. However, there has been a long history of crossdressing throughout the ages, and we are merely the latest version of this continual need to “break out” of our male prison garb. Seen in this context, I feel we are equal to, or slightly less experimental, than previous incarnations of the human race. It’s true that women are more prominent in areas that were once male-only, but, on closer inspection, I see the same gender divide in place, getting wider, not narrower, i.e. society at work...

Looking back, this has always been the case, and now, thanks to revisionist history, the role of women throughout history has gained a new appreciation. Unfortunately, men in touch with their feminine side are hardly ever revered, or even mentioned. To me, I keep thinking that there must have been crossdressers at all times, in all places, simply because it is a natural thing that springs forth in all sorts of environments and situations. This is the foundation we all stand on; even though outsiders cannot, or will not, recognize it. Regardless of the time or place, it seems to me that all men are not created equal, and some men prefer to step away from their expectations, doing something, during their relatively brief existence, that defines rather than confines. This has been going on for a long time, but it’s hard to see past the times we are living in...
:straightface:
Frédérique, I think you'd enjoy reading a book called Transgender Warriors by Leslie Feinberg, a fascinating history of trans women and men throughout history, and you're right, males in touch with their feminine side have seldom been appreciated, particularly in Judeo-Christian cultures.

Carol

[sometimes_miss]

<snip>No-one seems to know why males dress as females, as far as a common thread that ties us all together. <snip>
It's because there is no 'common thread'. People want simple answers to complicated questions, and they refuse to believe there isn't one.

Then of course, you have those of us who can't accept the reasons they dress up, so that unhinges the theories as well.

Bottom line is, there ARE reasons why we dress up as females. Some people want to know, some don't. Delving into our past is not always a pleasant thing to do, and lots of people are simply more comfortable just accepting the situation instead of facing all the psychological trauma that may lie underneath.

[Nikki50/50]

[COLOR="black"]It seems like that at first glance, but you have to somehow break out of this largely monocular vision of one’s own existence. I mean, I only know what I have seen and experienced during my own lifetime, so I can only comment on that with any degree of certainty. However, there has been a long history of crossdressing throughout the ages, and we are merely the latest version of this continual need to “break out” of our male prison garb. Seen in this context, I feel we are equal to, or slightly less experimental, than previous incarnations of the human race. It’s true that women are more prominent in areas that were once male-only, but, on closer inspection, I see the same gender divide in place, getting wider, not narrower, i.e. society at work...


Much of crossdressing was historically accepted in the greater body of the public in the form of theatre productions, when women were forbidden on-stage. As for those who kept it behind closed doors and NOT for theatrics, the barrier of fear is the enduring cause which stems the ebb and flow of any wider 'acceptance'.
For this reason it may be that we are the more experimental, given the somewhat lessened restraint of modern gender expectation (however marginal).
As for the actual gender divide itself; I know that I had stated that I would take no hard stance on any issue, but I rescind that one statement only to say that my own belief is that the gender divide will always be there, and that will not change, ever. No matter how diminished or aggrandized that divide will no doubt fluctuate between as ages pass.

[noeleena]

Hi,

Why do men wont to dress in female clothes & look like women yet most of the dresser's cross dresser's dont wont to take on the resposibilty of being a woman. like giveing birth working at home looking after any were from 2 to 6 & years earlyer some 10 children, do the cooking looking after house & home day after day & year on year, no time for ones self cleaning up after sick kids & all the rest of life, & maybe take in work to help pay for clothes for the children ,& try to look sexy after a hard day or be sick your self, so your husband can have a evening & the bedroom capers,

& then postnatal depression, & later in life menopousal symtoms plus other detail. & after all that quess who cant be bothered getting dressed up for an evening,

Many of the trans & dresser's only see a glamorous life of being pretty & struting around haveing a good time,

Im allso seeing a change in many men wont to take over the womans domain i wonder why, men have had for many years had the upper hand are now being taken over by strong women , so the back door is dress like women did & then take over so you can control where women go & do ,

Men thought they had control, they lost out in many aspects so is dressing being used as a comeback for control,

...noeleena...

[Nikki50/50]

Hi,

Why do men wont to dress in female clothes & look like women yet most of the dresser's cross dresser's dont wont to take on the resposibilty of being a woman. like giveing birth working at home looking after any were from 2 to 6 & years earlyer some 10 children, do the cooking looking after house & home day after day & year on year, no time for ones self cleaning up after sick kids & all the rest of life, & maybe take in work to help pay for clothes for the children ,& try to look sexy after a hard day or be sick your self, so your husband can have a evening & the bedroom capers,

& then postnatal depression, & later in life menopousal symtoms plus other detail. & after all that quess who cant be bothered getting dressed up for an evening,

Many of the trans & dresser's only see a glamorous life of being pretty & struting around haveing a good time,

Im allso seeing a change in many men wont to take over the womans domain i wonder why, men have had for many years had the upper hand are now being taken over by strong women , so the back door is dress like women did & then take over so you can control where women go & do ,

Men thought they had control, they lost out in many aspects so is dressing being used as a comeback for control,

...noeleena...

How dare men refuse to give birth to children! Fie and spite upon us all, says I! And how dare we skip out on our menopause! Oh the shame of it!
...
I think you may be jaded, a bit much? Although if you do happen upon a man who can give birth but won't, please be sure and point him out to the rest of us. LOL!
I'll be honest; that post seemed more of a rant than a reply, and very fragmented. I may not know why we do what we do...I can only speculate, and offer said observations...however I am one hundred percent certain that is isn't for a 'life a glamour' as you so eloquently put it. Also, I am sure that it isn't about using crossdressing as a means to regain any "lost" level of control. Maybe control of ourselves.