View Full Version : Out with Sister and Family Acceptance!!!!
AnneB1nderful
02-20-2013, 02:09 AM
My sister has known about my desire to become a woman for about 2 months. She was ok with my occasional crossdressing. But, once I told her I was exploring living life as a woman, she shunned away. Well about two weeks ago, she said, "I'm ready to spend some time with my big sister, Anne." She said she had been "enlightened". I literally cried with joy. So, we made plans for Sunday.
However, Sat night, was my twin nieces's 21st birthday. I went as their uncle, and carpooled with my sister. Several other family members were there and we had a great time. But, I really wanted to be there as Anne. We leave at 2am and sister stays at my place. I slept in man PJs. Haven't done that in my apt since December. Just didn't want to shock her.
Sunday morning I dressed up, and she was totally amazed. Even a little jealous. She hadn't been around anyone transgendered, let alone her brother. I was pretty nervous. She was awesome and really helped calm me down. Next thing you know, I feel so comfortable around her as her big sister. We went to get mani's and pedi's. Then went for a little shopping and dinner at fast food place. After that changed into club wear and we went to a pride night at a club in Santa Barbara. She said I was a bombshell and was jokingly angry because I looked better than she did. Now I know I have too many manly features to pass as a woman (especially height). But, I really appreciated her comment. We met a couple of my other friends and had the best time I've ever had at a club. I actually danced with my sister. She lead. I've never danced with a partner while a woman. Was very different, but fun!
Next morning we went to breakfast and we blended in well. She said compared to all the t-girls she met at the club, I was the most passable. She said my manners, makeup, voice, all were very close to a GG. I asked her if she liked me better as Anne or as a man. She said she likes both Anne and her brother. "However," she continued, "compared to 'the man' you've been over the past couple of years, I like Anne much better. (For those that don't know, my wife of, at that time, 28 years, left me for another man just over 1 1/2 years ago. So, I was depressed quite a bit. That's another story).
So, I asked my sister what she thought if I were to fully transition. She said, "I don't like that thought and would definitely miss my brother. But, you should do what's best for you and not worry about what anyone else thinks." I told her I'm leaning heavily in that direction. I'm seeing a gender therapist and exploring everything it takes to transition. But it will take years. However, I feel like I'm ready to live as a woman now. I just have to get a few more things done (beard removal and work issues).
Sis says, "You should start living as a woman and make your apartment fit Anne. However, what will you do when you visit family or they visit you." I told her I would respect them. If I need to present as a man to them, I will. But, I really don't think I will ever be able to present as the man they knew. Nevertheless, I would do my best for them. I went on, "There may be a time, that I will not be able to present as a man at all. And I have to be prepared to be outcasted." She said, "That would be their problem and their loss. We have to accept who you are regardless of what we expected you to be." Well, that was put to the test.
I found out that my 28-year-old daughter spilled out to my brother, his wife, one of his sons, and my other sister-in-law that I want to live as a woman full time. They were all drunk from my twin nieces's 21st birthday and my nephew was the designated driver. My brother is a very judgmental "Christian" (I know oxymoron - but as we all know, it's unfortunate that most "Christians" are very judgmental - again, another story). Well, I can't do anything right by him. His wife is not quite as bad as my brother, but close. So, I expected when they found out, they would completely reject me.
I didn't know until next day when sister-in-law calls and says, "Just want you to know that I will always love and support you no matter what lifestyle you choose." She says she's available to talk anytime and would even like to help in my feminine development. Wow! That's not all. She says my brother, who I thought would immediately disown me, is "dealing with it well." That's a miracle!
So, I call my daughter and asked why she told them. She says she thought they all knew. I was not upset, but reminded her that I told her it was my responsibility to tell everyone and I hadn't done it yet. (The alcohol not only removes inhibitions, but I selective memory too.) Daughter said she didn't remember and needed help dealing with her dad needing to be a woman. She said she was really proud of me finally allowing myself to be who I really am. It's just so hard for her to look at me any other way, than as her dad. I told her, "Thank you. No harm. I'm not ashamed of who I am. You can talk to anyone you want about how you feel. But when it comes to what I'm doing, have them talk to me." She said, "Ok", but I don't expect her to hold to that. It's more important that she can talk to people about it and come to grips the best way she knows how.
However, now it's out there and I'm sure it was going to slip out to my parents some other way. So I called my mom. She took it rather well and said, "I guess now I have a son and a new daughter." But, I don't think she fully understands what I mean about "transition".
Now it's time to tell dad. He was taken aback. But as I was talking to him, he realized that I am the same person - devoted Christian, loving and caring for people, wanting to do what's right. But, I'm emotionally stronger. He said, "You know son, lot's of men crossdress...more than you would ever know." I laughed and said, "Dad, I'm good friends with more crossdressers than YOU would ever know." And we both kinda chuckled. I didn't get into the whole "transition" thing with him. But, at least he knows that I'm being the "real me" and is accepting of that. I'm sure the rest of the family will "compare notes" and will be able to fill in gaps. At least I was able to give him my take before the family gossip spread like wildfire and next thing you know I'm walking the streets as a transvestite prostitute.....wait! There was that night last month..... I was walking the streets of West Hollywood looking like a prostitute........(hahaha) (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?189046-Anne-s-Adventures-Jan-2013/page2).
This is an amazing story compared to all the other transition horror stories I've been reading in this forum. I don't know why things seem to be flowing so well for me. Maybe because I live in California. Maybe it's because this is really who I am and everyone knew it deep down. Maybe it's because this is the path God has set before me and I'm just following His will. Regardless of the ease or pain of this path I'm on, I'm staying on it. I'm 98% sure I need to transition. I will not start hormones or any surgeries until I'm an unwavering 100% sure. As it stands, it will take a miraculous act of God to convince me that this is not who I am and I should not become the woman I've kept suppressed for so long.
As always, I welcome all comments. The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly. Don't worry about offending me. In order to make the most informed, most important, most life-changing decision I've ever made, I want to be exposed to every point of view I can comprehend.
janet54
02-20-2013, 02:14 AM
Anne. With all my heart I wish you the best. Be well and happy.
AmyGaleRT
02-20-2013, 03:22 AM
Blessed sister Anne, I am so very happy that your family has been this good about this! I doubt my own family would react so well to hearing about me...though I do sometimes feel like telling my mother, if only so she'd know that I've taken the name she would have given me and am keeping it safe. I think she, of all people, would probably be OK with it.
I've had the feeling that you would go this route for quite some time, and I believe with all my heart that you will transition, and you will come out the other side of it to live the rest of your days as a happy, well-adjusted woman. And I will continue to thrill to your stories and successes, as I move forward along my own path...probably not to your destination, and maybe more with my own cautious pace instead of your "light speed," but towards my own happiness nonetheless. I'm always your #1 fan.:)
Love and hugs :love: :hugs:
- Amy
Emma Beth
02-20-2013, 06:13 AM
Anne,
I'm glad to hear things are going so well.
When I read stories like yours, it gives me hope that humanity can be so kind when we are so often surrounded by the ugliness that is too often presented.
It also give me hope and insight into the possibilities as to some of the directions my own path may lead as I take my first steps in my own journey. Where my path goes is anybodies guess.
One thing I know for sure, I'm happy with who I am and that's all that matters.
Many hugs,
Jamie
Sara Jessica
02-20-2013, 09:23 AM
What a wonderful read Anne, thanks so much for sharing the story in such detail.
A couple things come to mind. First of all, my mom had the same reaction when I told her. That lasted about 24 hours and has since evolved into more of a DADT. My regret there is that she cannot see me the same way ever again even though she now knows of my true essence.
The other thought is that I feel as if my role as a cautionary friend might have to change. You know that I worry about the speed of light that you are traveling but at this point you are an object set into motion and I see you hitting that 100% point sooner than later. That is not necessarily a bad thing, especially since you seem to be very aware of taking everything into consideration. I hope your therapist challenges you, just as I will continue to do as your friend, with a healthy dose of encouragement as well :hugs:.
Beverley Sims
02-20-2013, 10:38 AM
Everyone has expressed their opinions here and I think the only thing that needs to be let out slowly and only if asked is the nitty gritty of the transition process.
Tell everyone what they want to know but the intimate details.
Some may read and I think if women ask you women's questions answer them simply unless it is absolutely necessary.
I hope you and your sister will become soul mates. That would be wonderful.
I think there are times you will still appear as a man and that is wise when trying to condition others minds.
I wish you the best and I watch your progress with interest.
kimdl93
02-20-2013, 11:10 AM
Honestly, I'm impressed at how well your family has accepted the news. I have no advice to offer, just best wishes as you enter into this new and unfamiliar terrain.
melissaK
02-20-2013, 11:23 AM
I noticed Bonnie Raitt is playing in town this weekend, so her song sorta fits don't you think? http://youtu.be/mJ58TVYNFro
Let's give 'em somethin' to talk about
(Somethin' to talk about)
A little mystery to figure out
(Somethin' to talk about)
Let's give 'em somethin' to talk about
Julie Denier
02-20-2013, 11:24 AM
So wonderful that you are getting the love and support you need ;)
Megan70
02-20-2013, 11:53 AM
AnneB,
Wonderful story and pretty much answers to this point of your life the question I asked last week on this forum:
(Sticky) Ask A Transexual-post 24 I followed up with a couple others on that thread with posts 32 and #38. Now for the big events to evolve that I really am curious as to how you handle them is all family gatherings for the first time as Anne.You won't know til it happens. Keep us informed. Good Luck, you are very devoted to yourself.
p.s. ( to Sara Jessica. what does the acronymn DADT stand for?)
Annaliese
02-20-2013, 12:20 PM
Anne, great story it is good to see that your family is with you an this, good luck
FurPus63
02-20-2013, 12:27 PM
WOW! That is so cool! That's what transition is all about. My story is pretty positive too. I think I know how you feel. It's like God wants it this way and it's all happening so fast and so amazing. It feels right and natural. Doesn't it? My best experience so far was Christmas. Presenting myself to my family for the first time. I was astranged from most of them for over 10 months as I went through my transition. It was so cool. I was dressed in an amazing red dress and looking good (not bragging, I really think I looked passable and felt great). It felt so cool to hear my nephews refer to me as "Aunt Paulette!" I almost cried when my nephew (Godson, I'm Catholic) asked me to play poker with them as always! It was an amazing feeling. I'll never forget it.
Like you, I thought about presenting myself to some of my relatives as a man or dressed half & half to expose them slowly into it. I chose not to. I presented myself early in my transition (last May) to my Uncle (Godfather) his wife and son. They were shocked at first and in fact sort of pissed at me for a few months. But after having lunch with my Aunt in November, to my amazing astonishment, my Uncle invited me to spend Christmas Eve with them! That too was totally awesome!
I've had some set backs along the way. Recently losing my job but then getting hired right away for a company where no one knows I'm trans. I passed all the interviews including a group interview and was hired last Friday! When I think about that. Being hired into a company who doesn't know a thing about my past and only the HR department (whom has access to my driver's license which still has the "M" on it) that is utterly amazing! It says a lot about me not only being passable as a woman, but to the whole transgender situation as a whole.
We don't have to be sitting around feeling sorry for ourselves. We can make it in this bad world of ours! Isn't that cool? Good luck girl and keep going! Full speed ahead!
Paulette
Jennifer Marie P.
02-20-2013, 05:34 PM
Anne do what your heart desires.
melissakozak
02-20-2013, 06:15 PM
Anne,
Having just one family member who is accepting is great. My sister and I have gone out to dinner, and she honestly feels like she has a sister she has never really had. Glad to hear things are positive, however, one thing does alarm me and that is family members just spilling the beans without your permission. You should control who knows and who doesn't. I understand alcohol likely played a part in it, but I can't emphasize enough how important it is for you to be at the helm, so to speak. It is not easy, and you never know who might have serious issues with you....however, it sounds like things are fairly positive on your end....;)
Bree Wagner
02-20-2013, 11:04 PM
Anne,
That's just so much good news in one thread that it's almost hard to believe. :) We're all terribly happy for you and hope that the world continues to throw good things in your path. And of course, if it doesn't, that you give it a good kick and make it do it anyways!
-Bree
Badtranny
02-21-2013, 01:04 AM
You should control who knows and who doesn't.
Not possible. When a Trans person comes out they are OUT. This ain't no "almost full time" deal, this is ALL IN. She's transitioning for real, not just going to the club on weekends. This is some seriously juicy gossip and there is absolutely no way to keep a lid on it.
...there is no secret transition
Diversity
02-21-2013, 01:42 AM
Anne, you're fantastic in being so honest and open about "YOU"! I applaud your will and courage, and commend you on doing what is right for you and your journey in becoming the person you need to be. Your sister gave you good advice about living as Anne before you make the final decision. I send you my deepest wishes for the best, and my prayers will be with you all the way. Look forward to hearing how you progress over the coming years.
Kind regards,
Di
Kaitlyn Michele
02-21-2013, 09:40 AM
Not possible. When a Trans person comes out they are OUT. This ain't no "almost full time" deal, this is ALL IN. She's transitioning for real, not just going to the club on weekends. This is some seriously juicy gossip and there is absolutely no way to keep a lid on it.
...there is no secret transition
exactly...this is word to the wise...they thing ts women tend to underestimate is how disclosure is uncontainable and its very possible that it has a negative impact on your transition plans for all kinds of reasons you can't think of
Sara Jessica
02-21-2013, 09:54 AM
WOW! That is so cool! That's what transition is all about.
No, this isn't what transition is all about. Perhaps it's what it should be all about but that is not the reality for most and my concern for Anne comes out of my being witness to transition gone bad, very bad. She has come very far very quickly. I want her to know as much of the good & bad, beautiful & ugly as possible from any and all sources out there.
The reality is that for many who make this decision, there is loss of any combination of family, friends and/or career. It's a sad reality for certain and fortunately, Anne hasn't encountered these setbacks. And I truly hope she doesn't just as I sincerely hope you don't either Paulette. But chances are way too high that there will be significant challenges in the future.
I applaud Anne, I support her but I don't want to see these decisions made with without full disclosure of both the joyous positives that can come from transition but also the tremendous potential for the negative. There is an essay out there which has been around for years that talks about the realities of transition for many. I did a cursory search this morning and wasn't able to find it. It had key phrases such as things not being a bed of roses, etc. just because one transitions. It was a cautionary tale, it was a reality check. I wish I could find it and if anyone knows of what I am talking about, I would really appreciate a link to the essay.
Anne, I told you one of the first times we talked at any length that I would not be your cheerleader. I will offer a listening ear, encouragement, advice when possible and also a healthy dose of caution. Like I said before, I see what is in your heart and I sense where you are likely to go and as such, all I can do is to be there for you, bringing what I am able to the information overload mix that I'm sure you are encountering.
BTW, I totally agree with Melissa. You may not have come out to select people as transitioning but the cat is out of the bag, so to speak. You know cats don't like to get back inside. Your ability to control who finds out going forward erodes by the day. Not necessarily a bad thing but at the same time if this causes you concern, there isn't much you can do about it.
Kaitlyn Michele
02-21-2013, 03:24 PM
thats right Sara
the mistake we tend to make is this.
too many times, disclosure is viewed as an exciting, fulfilling moment when it should be a tool in your transition....you tell people that need to know, when the right time comes..
......but the disclosure in and of itself is thought of as transition when you are doing it...it feels like this must be what transition is!!! I told my brother and is ok with it!!! see what i'm saying???
because the next day, its real...the aunt who hugged you is not there., your brother called his buddy and said "you are not gonna beleive this...."
....you have not transitioned...you just said some words that felt good
..part of transition is crawling over broken glass to get to the end...you will bleed...it will suck....and its going to scare the hell out of you if god forbid in a moment of weakness you wonder if you are gonna go through with it, or you wonder if you need to delay it or your HRT gets screwed up, or you realize you don't really "pass" and freak out....etcetcc...shit happens......and then you start to think of all the people that you told...and that can be a very bad feeling...
the more people you tell, the more other people find out, its too juicy... you take risks that cannot be predicted....its how you lose jobs, and its how you become marginalized by your friends and peers, and in the worst case, its how you accidently let other people screw up your transition...
pls be careful...it is joyous and liberating to tell people who you are...but be patient and smart...it will be worth it in the end..
AnneB1nderful
02-21-2013, 04:07 PM
On lunch break and quickly read your replies. The debates are very helpful too. Hope no one gets offended and drops out of discussions. Debates are healthy as long as they don't make personal attacks.
Anyways looking for some advice. Estranged wife is living in WA state with "boyfriend", and she knows I'm dressing but didn't want details. I told her in Nov I'll sign divorce papers after 15 months saying i don't want divorce. Now she's probing for details of my life. She's also stating she's depressed and misses "what we had before things went bad." Additionally, she's got serious health issues.
Question: Should I tell her I'm planning to live rest of life as a woman, or let her figure out on her own?
Again, your opinions are greatly appreciated and understand it's ultimately my decision. Just want to make informed one and hope to draw if others' experiences and viewpoints.
Badtranny
02-21-2013, 04:12 PM
Question: Should I tell her I'm planning to live rest of life as a woman, or let her figure out on her own?
Whatever the truth is; Tell her that.
Jorja
02-21-2013, 04:29 PM
Question: Should I tell her I'm planning to live rest of life as a woman, or let her figure out on her own?
Do you feel you need to tell her?
Kaitlyn Michele
02-21-2013, 04:52 PM
Its highly personal with emotional risks i don't think any of us can even guess..
but the principle applies...does she need to know? how will it improve your quality of life to tell her? what would telling her accomplish?
divorce is rough..
how does bringing this up in the context of signing papers make things better for either of you?
these are the questions you can ask yourself...
Rianna Humble
02-21-2013, 05:33 PM
I could be misjudging what you wrote completely, but if your estranged wife is suddenly probing for details on your life since you have agreed to grant her the divorce she has been asking for, then it seems to me that she is after anything she can use to her advantage. Why give her facts that she can then try to twist to your disadvantage?
arbon
02-21-2013, 05:40 PM
My first thought was along the line of what Rianna said, but I was also wondering if is she in contact with other family members or friends that will talk to her about it? If so maybe it is better to talk to her yourself first.
AmyGaleRT
02-22-2013, 01:42 AM
Anyways looking for some advice. Estranged wife is living in WA state with "boyfriend", and she knows I'm dressing but didn't want details. I told her in Nov I'll sign divorce papers after 15 months saying i don't want divorce. Now she's probing for details of my life. She's also stating she's depressed and misses "what we had before things went bad." Additionally, she's got serious health issues.
Question: Should I tell her I'm planning to live rest of life as a woman, or let her figure out on her own?
I wouldn't tell her anything. These are awfully snoopy questions, and stony silence is all the answer a snoopy question deserves...if we can't employ the Callahan's Place solution, which is to have Fast Eddie the piano player blackjack the asker and dump him/her in the alley. :D
What's more, I question her motives in asking these things at this time. She wanted a divorce, which you didn't want but were willing to grant her in the interests of both of your happiness. She may be looking to dig up "dirt" she can use against you in a divorce court...particularly if she's working with a trans-hostile lawyer, or happens to draw a trans-hostile judge. You may need to "lawyer up" yourself and just tell her, "Please refer any questions to my attorney." If she is looking to play games against you, this would tell her you've seen through her. If not, well, it would still convey a nice "bug off" to her.
And don't let her use those "health issues" to try to guilt-trip you, girlfriend. Being Anne is, I think, a "health issue" for you, and she's not too anxious to show you the same consideration, is she?
Lending all the moral support I can :love: :hugs:
- Amy
Maria in heels
02-22-2013, 06:14 AM
Anne...thank you for sharing your beautiful family with us
AnneB1nderful
02-22-2013, 03:15 PM
I wouldn't tell her anything. She may be looking to dig up "dirt" she can use against you in a divorce court...
I could be misjudging what you wrote completely, but if your estranged wife is suddenly probing for details on your life since you have agreed to grant her the divorce she has been asking for, then it seems to me that she is after anything she can use to her advantage. Why give her facts that she can then try to twist to your disadvantage?
My first thought was along the line of what Rianna said, but I was also wondering if is she in contact with other family members or friends that will talk to her about it? If so maybe it is better to talk to her yourself first.
Amy, Rianna, Arbon,
I feel I know her pretty well. I believe she is sincere. Here's what she said in a recent message:
"As far as working on the divorce.....haven't been real proactive on that. Time, work, and other excuses get in the way. I think I am dealing with some other issues concerning that. Security, fear, letting go and moving forward."
She's lost again. She's not happy where she's at and who she's with. She left me because she felt insecure. How can she feel secure when her husband has to be a woman?
But now, she's sensing the strength and security in who I am. So, her probing is to determine if she can come back to me. Will I accept her? Can she accept me?
Yes, I will accept her. So, the question is "Can she accept me?" The whole me as a woman? I am hopeful she can. But, I'm also very doubtful she will. She's got way too many insecurities. So, I keep advising her to work on herself. Not to stress over a divorce.
the principle applies...does she need to know? how will it improve your quality of life to tell her? what would telling her accomplish?
how does bringing this up in the context of signing papers make things better for either of you?
K,
In my heart, I signed the papers in November when I agreed to sign them. So, it won't change my quality of life. Yet, I still love my wife. So my concern is her quality of life. I still believe, even as a woman, I am the best mate for her. I love her unconditionally and can help guide her through her emotional roller coasters. The problem was she saw me as a threat to her security. I don't blame her. I was confused and denying who I really was. But, I think she sensed it. So, how can I help her when I don't even know who I am anymore. If I would have known what I know now about myself, she may have still left me, but may not have run into another man's arms so abruptly. I don't blame myself for what she did. She did it. But, my confusion was a contributing factor to her desperation to find security.
Do you feel you need to tell her?
Jorja,
Yes, I feel I need to be the one to tell her. However, my fear is that she can't handle it and would take responsibility for who I am.
Whatever the truth is; Tell her that.
Melissa,
You are always direct and to the point. I don't mind telling her the truth. I just don't want to hurt her.
So, here's what I plan to do. I plan to ask her directly why she's probing into my life. That will help her examine the reason herself. I think I can gauge by her response what her true motivations are. We'll go from there.
Thanks for all your responses. They really do help me get a clearer perspective on things. All of you are such blessings. I just want to grab all of you with one BIG GROUP HUG!!! :bighug:
mikiSJ
02-22-2013, 04:12 PM
Amy
She may be looking to dig up "dirt" she can use against you in a divorce court...
California is a no fault state, and being transgendered will not be a reason to restrict visitation if any of Anne's children are minors.
Anne
Do you have any more neices with 21st birthdays coming up! You seem to have handled last weekend's celebration really, really well considering what got dumped on you ahead of your schedule!
Michelle55
02-22-2013, 04:33 PM
I'm still on the side that says "don't tell her anything". I'd finish with the divorce and then if she still wanted to know more, then I'd seriously consider telling her. If after that, you both feel like you should be together, start again like you did when you first met years ago. After all, you are a different person now. To be completely fair, I'm guessing she is different now too.
We never really know another person as well as we think we do. I was completely blind-sided after 26 years of marriage. No, my dressing did not have a significant part to play in the divorce (her words as well as my opinion).
At the time of the separation I felt we were right for each other. In the time after my divorce, I met and married a wonderful woman that LIKES Michelle. My Ex is still alone 8 years later and according to her sister, the Ex is pretty much unhappy with her life.
So, yes I was probably right for her, but I don't think she was the best for me. The best thing she did for me in years was move out and insist on a divorce. I would have carried a lot of guilt if I had done what she did, and even more when my life is better and her life is not. I took the high road and she made out like a bandit finacially, but I have a clear conscience.
You should first do what is best for you. Then if after your divorce is final and you still think being with your Ex is a good thing, then work towards that.
Oh and BTW, if you don't already have one, get a lawyer. He will at least make sure all the legal issues are handled correctly.
Ceri Anne
02-22-2013, 05:52 PM
So happy for you, and really envious of your weekend with your sister, that sounds so awsome. I wish you the best in coming to your decison on how far you should transition.
AnneB1nderful
02-22-2013, 06:06 PM
California is a no fault state, and being transgendered will not be a reason to restrict visitation if any of Anne's children are minors.
...Do you have any more neices with 21st birthdays coming up! You seem to have handled last weekend's celebration really, really well considering what got dumped on you ahead of your schedule!
My wife is living in WA and is a no fault state also. Fortunately all our children are in their mid-20s.
No more 21st BDays for a couple of more years. However, I think the cat is out of the bag and word is gonna spread like wildfire. Not worried.
I'm still on the side that says "don't tell her anything". .....
You should first do what is best for you. Then if after your divorce is final and you still think being with your Ex is a good thing, then work towards that.
Oh and BTW, if you don't already have one, get a lawyer.
I don't think she's even pursuing a divorce right now. I'm kinda leaning toward telling her so that will force her hand. Either divorce me because you can't accept Anne or accept Anne and come back. But, if she decides to pursue divorce in CA, we would have to liquidate our joint property. My parents are living in that house (long story) and we have some time shares. If we divorce in WA, we keep property jointly and don't have to liquidate. However, she can't afford payments would probably be more than she would get out of me from a divorce.
So, at this point, I'm just gonna wait and see what see what her intentions are and then decide from there.
Kelli Ca
02-22-2013, 07:08 PM
Ann as always I am so impressed by your attitude, but mostly your strength. I always. Feel soo much better after talking to you. It really warms my heart to hear the pure joy in your voice when talking abou your updates with family, w should all be so lucky as to have that level of acceptance. I like what Sara called it, your faster hen light journey, soo fitting. I feel your doing the right thing by not letting anything stand in your wy and taking life by the horns. You've been and are and will be such a good girl friend, and again I'm so happy to have you in my life. Your most definitely,, living the dream girl! Go for it!
AnneB1nderful
02-25-2013, 09:17 PM
Kelli,
You're such a good friend. I appreciate your comments and being able to talk to you about anything is such a blessing.
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