This Forum inhibits Crossdressing

[Dragster]

My wife is anti-CDing, but fuelled by the enthusiasm and advice of many of you here, I'm making one last attempt to change her mind (I've posted the details elsewhere many times), but progress is painfully slow.
Before I found this forum, I used to take every opportunity I could get to wear something feminine. Even if she was out of the house for an hour or so, I'd find a sexy bra, stockings, satin slip etc. and just enjoy a few minutes of sensual bliss, often leading to relief! For longer periods, I'd wear more. Several times I nearly got caught when she came back earlier than expected, but so far I've been lucky for the 36 years we've been married.
Since I found this forum earlier this year, my desire to go the whole hog, and get into heels, wigs and make-up, ultimately to get out into the world, meet others with similar interests, and "pass" as a woman has increased, but still remains a distant dream. You've been an example to me of what can be achieved. But the urge to take up every opportunity to wear a little lingerie has subsided. I now only start to dress if I have a few hours where I know I won't be disturbed. Instead of dressing for the short periods, I jump on the 'net and find out what you've all been up to since I last had an opportunity to log on without my wife knowing. I think she knows that I visit here, but not how much time I spend at it, and she does not approve of that either.
So, since I found you all, my crossdressing activity has actually diminished. Perhaps just reading about it has become a partial substitute for doing it, and of course, it may be a different story if my wife was approving, or even supporting. Has anybody else noticed this?

Tony

[emmicd]

You're right to some degree. By coming to this website you find you're not alone and it does sometimes serve as a substitute for dressing.

However it is still nice to dress when you can.

It is also nice to know that there are many crossdressers out there.

emmi

[Kierci]

Hey Draggster, you can live vicariously through the rest of us if you would like, besides it is much cheaper on the wardrobe. And just think you dont have to worry about getting makeup on your clothes.

[Sarahgurl371]

I agree, I used to take every opportunity that I could. Just wear something for a little while. But now, after being here and talking with you all, I find that unless I have alot of time, I don't dress at all. Its to the point, that unless I have 6 or 8 hours to myself, I won't dress. I just really want to experiment with make up and the rest, and it takes soooooo long to get all done up only to have to immeadiately take it all back off. i find that very discouraging. And this forum may fulfill some of the need. I always feel better just being able to talk about all this!

[suanne]

Hi all. My dressing hasn't really changed that much. But since I have been on the cd forum I find that I don't beat myself up as much about dressing. It really helps to be with others with the same desires and interests as I have. I have been getting some good ideas on dressing and lots of other helpful things related to cding. The computer security thread has helped me also. I hope this is related to this thread and I haven't got off track here.


Thanks, Suanne

[jennifer easton]

Tony! I have found this to be true, only I didn't know how to put it, so thanks for saying it so well.xoxoxJennifer

[Helana]

Dragster

That makes a lot of sense. You are able to express your feminine thoughts here openly and receive encouragement and acceptance. That helps to fill the emotional void created by your wife's non-acceptance and thus eliminates the urgency you felt to crossdress when you were alone and without support.

You should point that out to your wife. SInce she is unwilling to recognize your crossdressing needs then she is wrong to try to prevent you from seeking support and friendship from forums like this.

I feel for you, it is a no-win situation when your wife refuses to budge an inch from her prejudices. It does not leave you with many options and pushes you into a corner. Somehow you need to find a way to get that message across.

[suezeq]

my partner a good one she lets me dress every day in one form or another we even went shopping for me to day nobody took a second look as i pickedwhat i wanted and then payed

[KatieZ]

But the urge to take up every opportunity to wear a little lingerie has subsided. I now only start to dress if I have a few hours where I know I won't be disturbed.


Quality vs. Quantity

It's more satisfying to spend leisurely Quality time rather than being rushed in half assed attempts. My own situation I don't have anyone or anything stopping me from dressing when I want. Depending on my work load I have spent up to a week at a time fully dressed. It has gotten to the point that I don't dress that much now because I miss the male side of me. I'm sure that is just a passing faze though. LOL


Hugs


Hugs

[ginafaye]

i still dress as much but this site is a godsend just for the comon ground we all share as in life there is always a path forward and as you look behind you can see others where you have been

[Ellaine]

But the urge to take up every opportunity to wear a little lingerie has subsided. I now only start to dress if I have a few hours where I know I won't be disturbed. Instead of dressing for the short periods, I jump on the 'net and find out what you've all been up to since I last had an opportunity to log on without my wife knowing.

Hi Dragster Quality (time) instead of quantity. Good for you ;) I think most of us go along that route, one way or another.
I do hope you make progress with your wife, is an open declaration on the cards?

Hugs Ellaine

[Marla GG]

Hiya Tony,

I have been following your posts since I joined the forum 6 months ago (is that ALL? And what the heck did I do with my time before that? Ha ha). I have always been impressed by your obvious love and respect for your wife and I have thought many times that if anyone had a chance of changing his unaccepting spouse's mind, it would be you. You have been so patient and understanding with her, and you have done everything right as far as I can tell, so believe me when I say that I really sympathize with your plight. Every time I see a post from you I keep hoping for better news. :hugs:

It makes perfect sense to me that reading the forum could become something of a substitute for actually dressing. In my chats with other wives, I have often heard them observe that the less their husbands dress, the more they they think about it and read about it. It's a shame that you have to choose one or the other, but understandable given your circumstances.

Happy holidays and best wishes for the coming year......

Love Marla.

[gennee]

I enjoy crossdressing, even if it is just wearing panties. Some days I wear more articles. I am not stressed if I do not dress up and the down time is a time to reflect on how far I have come. I cherish each time I wear any kind of women's articles.

Gennee:)

[Dragster]

Thanks to all of you who posted on my thread. Not for the first time since I came here, I find I am not alone! In the beginning (for me), I realised that there were lots of you out there just like me, and telling you my story was like lifting a heavy weight off my shoulders. Now I find many of you are also maturing into "quality, not quantity". When I spend the time to get dressed, I want to spend some quality time enjoying the feeling before stripping it all off before my wife comes home. I guess if I was into make-up and wigs, it would take even longer to get ready, and I'd want longer to enjoy it too.

Marla, I felt really touched by your post (and I still love your smile - lucky Angel!). Have you really been waiting with baited breath for good news from NW England? Obviously, so have I! And yes, I do love my wife dearly and I guess it shows. She does a fantastic job looking afer me too, especially this year since I've been on crutches for 6 months of it with two operations to straighten my big toes. But with the approach to Christmas, and me not able to help much with preparations, I don't think "My Husband Betty" will be out of the cupboard until the new year, so we'll both have to wait. 2006 will have to be crunch year, either way! Should I install a chimney, like the Vatican, so I can send up black smoke if no decision has been made, and white smoke when/if my wife eventually agrees that she can tolerate my CDing? Now there's an idea!

Thanks again for your support.

[Daphne Renee]

I understand where your coming from . My wife is one of those who thinks its ok during halloween but not really any other time. I have only been married for a few years but I hope my marriage lasts 36 years..

I do find some comfort in knowing I am not alone and I hope you do as well.

[andreaboots]

No offense to anybody here but I thank god I'm single again and live alone in my own home. As the old cliche saying goes, "been there done that" sort of thing and I absolutely hated it!! My current relationship with my GG/SO is one made in heaven. At my age I thought that finding somebody that not only understood and accepted it but encourages it would be impossible to find so I began to resign myself to a lonely and solitary life. I'm truly blessed in one way but cursed in another, meaning, I'll never know what it would be like to grow old with somebody you loved your whole life. But you gotta do what you gotta do. CD'ing for me now is something that is a very integral part of my life. The only thing that is missing with my current CD'ing experience is being with some girls dressed out somewhere that is CD friendly and or to have a private gathering with my new found sisters at my home or my GG's. Perhaps one day??? Love you all and the threads in these forums are invaluable!!! XXX:thumbsup:

[Kierci]

Has anyone seen any crossdressers around here? I have seen a crap load of ladies :D

[Dayna]

I read this post the other night and knew I was going to respond; I hope that not too many of my ideas are redundant.

I am. Therefore, I dress.

Wasn’t always that way, of course. My first interest in women’s clothing (especially panties and ‘hose) happened during puberty, during a time when I had few male influences at home; my older brothers had moved out, and my dad traveled a lot. Then, I dressed purely for sexual pleasure.

30yrs later, I find that I am rarely “turned on” by crossdressing. Now, dressing up is one of the ways I express my femme side. I strongly believe that all of us (men) have feminine traits, and we choose whether, and how, to display them. I call my softer side “Dayna”, and I reveal her in a number of ways:
- Wearing women’s underwear and lingerie
- Putting in makeup and a wig (even with somewhat androgynous clothes) to create a physical feminine illusion
- Taking photos of myself while dressed, to show others the femme qualities that I feel
- Pampering my wife and focusing on her pleasure
- Spending many hours on this forum, reading others’ posts and joining in discussions to better learn about who I am, and to become more comfortable and confident with myself.

So, has my desire to crossdress diminished since coming here? Perhaps. But only because I am discovering other ways to display my femme side.

[Jasmine Ellis]

Dragster, enjoy when ever you can darling, I know it's hard, cos when I was married I was like you only dressing when the wife was out. I told her after 5 years married that I love wearing womens clothes and now she's my ex. And I must say she's a friend to me not an ex, she's the only one in my part of the family who knows. I live and go out dressed.