Coming out

[Janelle_C]

I am making good progress with my therapist. We have been talking about me going on HRT. If you where to take my wife and grown children out of the mix I would do it yesterday, but they are in the mix. I talked to my wife this weekend about whether she understood that I was leaning on going down that path and she said yes she knew that. We talked about how that would effect our relationship, we are both committed to staying together but we know it will be different and will take some more counseling. But before any of this I have to take steps to come out to the people I love. I have already done a lot of changes to myself, long hair, pierced ears, long nails.....but I don't think people automatically think oh he wants to be a woman. So this Wednesday I'm telling my first person, a close friend who I know will not judge me or tell any one else until I'm ready. Even throw I know she is going to be the easiest one to talk to I'm still nervous. Down the road I'm worried how my kids and I will enter act, right now they are a big part of my life. I know they will always love me but I don't know if they will accept me. Wish me luck Janelle

[Persephone]

It isn't easy, Janelle, but it is so worth it. I came out to all of my local friends and every one of them has stayed friends. Now I am free to go everywhere, to do everything, and to be me!

I wish you the same blessings that I have enjoyed.

Hugs,
Persephone.

[outhiking]

Good luck to you. You have all of our support.

[StaceyJane]

Good LucK, Janelle!

[Sandra]

Janelle if your wife is not already a member may I suggest that she join, and join FAB she'll get a lot of support in there as I have.

I'm sure that telling your friend will go ok, just be honest with her, as for your kids, you'd be surprised at how they react, even more so how much they already know. Our daughter said she known for some time that there was something...luckily she was and still is ok with everything.

Good luck and keep us updated.

[Starling]

Janelle, I'll join the chorus of good-luckers!

:) Lallie

[Rianna Humble]

It is great news that your wife is committed to seeing this through with you, I hope she understands that you know how special she is.

Letting people around you know can seem daunting, but if you prepare well enough should go relatively smoothly. Please don't forget that if you are asked a difficult question about which you are unsure, then "I don't know" is a valid answer.

I have no experience of having children of my own. Do you think it might go better if you were with your wife when telling your children?

[Laurie Ann]

Janelle,

I want to add my voice to the chorus of well wishers.

[Janelle_C]

Janelle if your wife is not already a member may I suggest that she join, and join FAB she'll get a lot of support in there as I have.

I have suggested that see join but at this time she doesn't want to. She seems to take each step that I take okay, but then she goes on about her life like nothing is different. I think she holds a lot in which worries me a little. When I start to take the steps I need I think it will become much more real for her. Hopefully she will come her for support.

[melissaK]

STOP. Don't do it! Janelle, Are you plum crazy?
Trying to be yourself? Really? Telling a friend! how humiliating!
You think it might make you happy or something?
You march right down to the barber and get that hippie hair cut - you think you're 18? You think you're in a rock band? Your not! Then get home and clean those girl clothes out and throw them away! PURGE NOW!
And who's that whiney enabling touchy feely counselor? Stop payment on that last check right now. If you can't suck it up and be a man then use those counseling payments for some electro-shock therapy, that ought a stop this nonsense of wanting to be happy dead in its tracks!!

:^)

(I'm obviously very excited and hopeful for you. I just wanted to remind you of how far you've come).

[emmicd]

It certainly is not easy coming out but for me I had no choice and things are going ok. I still have my wife and son. I still have my sisters. I still have my nieces and nephews. I still have my friends. I have a great new job where I am accepted as Emily.
I am very lucky! I can pinch myself! I wish you all the best in your journey and wish everything works out as you hope it to.

Emily

[StephanieC]

Good luck! Discussion with your wife is priceless.

-stephani

[Anne2345]

Coming out to friends and my sister is among the most important things I have ever done for myself in my life. Without them, and the blessings and support of my wife, I could not have made it this far. I am certain I would have been lost, lost, lost beyond redemption had I foolishly attempted to do this alone (I did try, though, and the attempt damn near killed me, but I digress).

Regardless, it has been soooooo much easier with the support, acceptance, validation, and love I have received in so doing. And that I can be me, with no pretense, no facade, no act, is beyond priceless. I wish you well, and my thoughts and hopes are with you!!! :-)